Life as I know it | By : BlindedHP Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Harry/Snape Views: 75938 -:- Recommendations : 2 -:- Currently Reading : 6 |
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story. |
Title: Life as I know it
Summary: This fic is BDSM. Harry is not the boy that everyone expects him to be when he first enters Hogwarts. This fic is Snarry slash with Snape as Harry's Dom.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything Harry Potter related. This magical world belongs to JK Rowling and various publishers. No profit is being made from this.
Warnings: BDSM, dom/sub, non-con, dub-con, sexual situations, master/slave, chan, violence and some more that I can't think of right now.
Chapter 13 (Posted on 4 March 2015): The little green monster...
"YES Sirius! I'm fine. In fact, I've never been better. Professor Snape is a great Apprentice Master and he's taking good care of me." Harry smiled at the figure of his Master who stood in the corner, with a scowl on his face.
Sirius turned to Snape as Harry smiled at him, frowned at Snape, and then turned back to Harry.
"You'll tell me if he does anything questionable to you, won't you?"
Harry looked at Sirius in bewilderment before the meaning of the words registered in his brain and he scowled at his godfather. Sirius looked at Harry once, before he swiveled and snarled at Snape. His godson was spending way too much time with Snape if he was picking up facial expressions from the dour man.
"You still haven't told me why, exactly, you refused to let anyone come see you for two whole weeks, two weeks!."
Harry sighed and held up his hands in surrender.
"I'm sorry Sirius but there was some kind of poison on the blade that Bellatrix stabbed me with and whatever it was it was also contagious. Professor Snape had to put up a shield every time he came near me during that time, and I just didn't want to 'infect' anyone else with it. Believe me, it's no fun to have your hands and feet switch position, reversed positions! I had to walk on my 'hands' which were my feet and eat with my 'feet' which were my hands and my right hand was actually my left foot and its just way too complicated to explain to you!"
The soft, barely noticeable snort from the corner had Harry turning around and smirking at his Master. He could see the veiled amusement in the man's eyes, but he could also see pride and just a bit of smugness. The man had clearly not realized just how much of a Slytherin Harry truly was…
"Okay, okay Harry. I get the picture and yes, in that case, I'll thank you for keeping everyone at bay. Especially Remus! Just think how it would have affected him, what with the full moon having been during the time you were 'contaminated'."
"Jeez, thanks Sirius, you make me sound like I'm a disease!"
"Well, you were, weren't you?" Sirius laughed and Harry quirked his lips at that.
"Maybe, but that's over now and I'm fine. We better get going, the feast is about to start. It was nice seeing you again Sirius. Are you back for good now or do you have to go on some or other 'errand' again?"
"I'm afraid I'm leaving again, tonight as a matter of fact. Oh, did you know Harry; they've set a trial date! With Peter captured, I'm as good as a free man!"
Harry couldn't help but smile at that. He really didn't like the thought of someone in his 'family' being on the run from the law and being hunted by dementors. His own remembered experiences with the horrible creatures made him shiver.
"That's great Sirius. I'm really glad for you."
"You know what that means though, don't you? You can come live with me! I'll be your legal guardian as soon as I'm acquitted of any wrong doings."
Panic was the only way Harry could describe the feeling building up inside him. He liked Sirius, the man was fun to be with and a real prankster; but live with him? That would mean leaving his Master, leaving the one person who had been a constant in his life for five years now. No, he couldn't do that, wouldn't do that.
Harry smiled weakly at his godfather before turning questionable eyes to his Master. Master Severus gave a barely perceptible shake of his head and Harry felt relief wash through him. No, Sirius would not be his guardian, no matter what the Ministry decided on.
"Come Potter! Your celebrity status might impress some but I assure you that I'm not one of them. Your godmutt has an assignment to get on the way with, so if you can wrap this up, we can leave."
"You're not the boss of him Snivillus!" Sirius turned back to Harry then. "He's right unfortunately; I really have to go Harry. Let me know if you need anything though, anything at all."
"I will. Thank you Sirius."
Harry gave his godfather a loose hug before quickly stepping away. He'd become used to giving and receiving hugs from his Master but anyone else was still a foreign concept to him.
Master Severus opened the door and Sirius quickly left after sending another scathing look at Snape.
"Come Harry, we really have to get going if we're going to make it to the feast without drawing unwanted attention to ourselves."
Harry was surprisingly the first person seated at the Slytherin table and he waited anxiously to see if the person he wanted to speak with the most, was going to sit next to him or not.
As soon as Draco entered the hall, Harry's eyes followed him. Draco had not yet spotted Harry though, but as soon as he noticed Harry sitting in their usual spot, his steps faltered a bit.
Harry smiled reassuringly at him and Draco regained control of his body. Striding proudly down the hall and to the seat next to Harry, Draco nodded curtly at anyone who greeted him, before he pulled the chair next to Harry's out.
The proud and somewhat obnoxious air around Draco was intact as usual, but Harry could see the worried look in his friend's eyes.
Smiling at Draco and greeting him with a friendly "Good evening", Harry could almost see the relief in Draco's eyes.
"Good evening Harry. Had a good summer?"
Harry decided that maybe small talk was the best for now and so he humored Draco with answers to questions and some questions of his own.
The sorting went almost unnoticed by the two as they traded stories about their summer and by the end of the feast, Harry had run out of 'frivolous' topics to discuss.
"Meet me in the classroom two doors down from the Potions classroom in half an hour." Harry stated as they stood to leave the hall. Draco nodded that he'd heard and left with the rest of the students.
Harry quickly made his way to the chambers he shared with his Master, where he waited for the man to return.
"I'm going to have a little talk with Draco in twenty minutes. Was there anything you wished me to do before I leave?"
Master Severus had just entered their quarters, and he gave Harry a penetrating look, before making his way over to 'their' couch.
"No thank you Harry. Do you wish me to be there when you talk to Draco?"
"I think it best if I talk to him alone first. I'll inform you of what he says, but I doubt he'll have made a real decision just yet."
"You're right of course. Draco won't make a decision until it becomes absolutely necessary for him to do so. Come here a moment Harry."
Harry quickly stepped over to where his Master was seated and knelt in front of him.
"I put the spell - the one that was to punish you if you did something you knew I would disagree with - in a sort of 'dormant state', but I think it best if I re-activate it again. I will tweak it a bit, well a lot, so that it sends me a visual of what you're doing at the time, and I can decide whether or not it should go through with the punishment. That way, if something like what happened with Umbridge happens again, I can just give you one good spanking to let you know that I'm not pleased with your decision, and if you continue, I'll decide which course to take. If I'm in the vicinity, I'll come to you, otherwise I'll be forced to let know you just how much you displease me at that moment."
The thought of having that particular punishment active again made Harry cringe on the inside, but he knew that nothing like what had happened the last time, would happen again.
"Yes Master. Thank you Master."
Master Severus waved his wand while saying a rather lengthy incantation and Harry gasped at the tingling feeling on his buttocks. Oh, this was not good, his cock was twitching at the sensations the spell evoked.
Blushing as he stood, Harry quickly bid his Master a good evening and went to the classroom he had agreed to meet Draco at.
It became readily apparent that neither of them knew how to broach the subject, which they knew they had to discuss.
Harry looked over at where Draco was idly twiddling his thumbs, while looking at the far end of the room, but clearly not seeing the room itself.
Deciding to be blunt, as neither of them had come up with a good way to start, Harry said the first thing that came to mind:
"I'm not mad at you for leaving us to deal with all of them alone. I know your father was out there and that you were torn between the two sides." Harry was gratified to see that Draco was at least listening to him, as he could see the blonde boy twitching as if he wanted to run away again. "You're my friend Draco and that means that until such a time as we come face to face with each other on opposite sides of a battle, I will stand by you and help you anyway I can."
Draco turned to face him then, and Harry could see the turmoil boiling behind the grey eyes.
"You still want to be my friend? Even after that?! What kind of person leaves a friend in the middle of a battle to fend for himself? I left you in the middle of six, or as I thought at the time, seven, Death Eaters after your blood. You would have had to fight – what was it, four – Death Eaters on your own as Professor Snape took on two of them. You don't know how relieved I was when I saw the other Professors come to your aid."
Harry smiled sadly at Draco before he walked over to the boy and sat down beside him.
"I know what you did Draco and I understand completely where you're coming from. Believe me, were my father alive and we loved each other as much as I can see you love your father, I would not have been able to decide between the two of you. I'm glad you didn't make a rash decision, as I'm afraid to think of who you would have chosen, no don't say anything, I don't want to know if you would have chosen your father or me. Choose for yourself Draco. Don't choose one side because you want to please either one of use, choose for yourself and decide what you think is best for you in the long run."
Silence fell between them then and Harry just sat there thinking of that day during the 'battle'. He was glad that Draco had not made his decision that day, as decisions made in a panic usually led to deep regret or heartbreak.
Turning to Draco again Harry decided to finish off and then return to his Master.
"I'm glad that you're my friend Draco and don't want to loose you over something as stupid as a war. Yes, we will eventually have to decide which sides we fight on, but I've learned the hard way that friends or anyone you come to care for, means more than anything else in the world. Even a war. We will all die eventually, and I feel that I would rather die with the knowledge that I had friends and people who cared about me, than knowing that I kept myself secluded and separate from everyone and thus died alone, having accomplished absolutely nothing in life."
Harry finished with that and was in the process of standing up when he felt strong arms grip him around the waist, and looked up just in time to see Draco close the space between them and plant his lips on Harry's.
Nothing like this had ever happened to Harry, and the feeling of a warm body pressed up against his, caused his cock to twitch and harden a bit.
Just as he was about to pull away, a sharp smack on his buttocks made him gasp, and Draco's tongue found its way inside his mouth.
Another sharp smack hit him and Harry pulled away from the arms around him.
"I'm sorry Draco, but I have to go."
With that, he rushed out of the classroom and to his Master's quarters. He didn't know exactly what had just happened, but he knew that his cock was definitely interested in the feelings those lips on his had stirred.
His bum was burning a bit with the two sharp spankings he'd received and he dreaded having to face his Master. The fact that the man had not once but twice activated the spell, made it clear to him that what had just happened had not pleased his Master, at all.
Coming to a stop in front of their quarters, Harry took a deep breath and eased the door open as silently as he could.
His Master was pacing in front of the fire but as soon as Harry entered, he turned to the door and froze.
Harry didn't know what he'd expected when coming to face his Master, but the emotions swirling in those black depths had certainly not been what he'd expected.
Hurt, he could identify but other emotions also burned in his Master's eyes, and Harry couldn't help but turn away from them. It hurt to look at his Master at the moment, for he knew that he had hurt the man deeply.
No one said anything though, and when Harry had at last gathered up the courage to once again look at his Master, the man silently pointed at Harry's door. Harry all but fled to his room.
Stupid, stupid, stupid! Severus paced in front of the fire once again when Harry's door had closed. The spell had for some reason or another decided that maybe he would not be pleased to see Harry kissing someone, someone other than himself.
As soon as the picture of Harry and Draco had appeared in his mind, he had activated the spell. Rage, hurt and betrayal swirled through him but when Harry gasped as the spell punished him, and Draco took advantage of the situation, Severus saw red. Luckily, after the second time he had activated the spell, Harry had realized that he was very displeased at the moment and had said a quick goodbye.
Now, as he could logically think about what had happened, Severus cursed himself for acting rashly.
Yes, seeing Harry kissing another had hurt, more than he cared to admit but that was no reason to punish the boy. Their contract at the moment was such that Severus, while the boy's Master, was more of a mentor figure than anything else. He cared for the boy, disciplined him and helped him when needed. He had agreed that any sexual aspect of the relationship would be left for when, and if, Harry decided that he wanted to enter a real Dom/sub relationship with him.
That he had already decided that he wanted Harry as his sub, was not relevant, as he would not force the boy into anything. He wanted their relationship to be consensual when they decided to take it further, and forcing the boy into anything was definitely not safe, sane or consensual.
He would just have to put his own feelings back behind that hard shell he had built around his heart, and hope that it would keep him from going insane.
Something was wrong, horribly wrong but what it was, Harry wasn't certain. His Master had been acting weird for months now and Harry was at the end of his rope.
He didn't know what had triggered this change in his Master's behavior, but most of the signs pointed to one thing: Draco.
Master Severus had been harsher with Draco than he'd ever been with anyone else. As Draco and his Master had always had a rather amicable relationship, Harry couldn't help but wonder what had happened that his Master seemed to now hate Draco.
Harry himself had taken to spending less time with Draco, as every time he was with the boy, his Master showed up and scowled fiercely at the two.
Harry wanted dearly to talk to Draco about what had happened at the beginning of the year, but an opportunity never presented itself. He was either busy with class, doing potions with his Master, or swallowing lumps when his Master came up behind him and Draco whenever they finally found time to talk.
His Master's behavior toward him had also changed. Some days Harry could feel eyes on his back, and knew that his Master had once again taken the Time Turner to keep an eye on him, but other days his Master completely ignored him. It was driving him crazy!
One Saturday evening Harry was lying on the couch in the living room, reading a novel he had found in the library, when his Master entered. The man scowled fiercely at Harry and snapped at him to go to his own rooms as he was contaminating the furniture in the lounge.
Something about the tone in his Master's voice triggered memories Harry had long suppressed and he snapped.
Falling to his knees, Harry began apologizing profusely. He apologized for anything and everything he had done wrong. He apologized for accidentally moving his Master's toothbrush half an inch from where it had been the week before, when he had slipped and grabbed onto the sink, and his hand had brushed against the toothbrush moving it slightly. He apologized for putting two sugars in his tea instead of one and a half as usual – he was developing somewhat of a sweet tooth. He apologized for any and every transgression he could remember doing the past seven months.
He became aware of strong arms around him, rocking him back and forth, and couldn't hold his tears back any longer.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. If Master tells me what I did wrong, I'll undo it. I won't ever do it again, I promise. I'm so, so sorry!"
"Ssshhh Harry. Calm down, its okay. You did nothing wrong, I promise. Ssshhh, calm down."
The calming words continued and Harry eventually loosened the death grip he had on his Masters' robe.
"I'm the one who should be apologizing Harry. I've been absolutely horrible to you, and everyone else, these past few months. You did nothing wrong Harry, nothing! I'm sorry, really truly sorry for what I've put you through. I can't tell you just how sorry I am Harry; that you've lasted as long as you did without snapping is a miracle. You're stronger than you give yourself credit for Harry."
Harry shifted a bit until he was pressed up with his back against his Masters' chest. They were both on the floor in front of 'their' couch, but Harry couldn't care less. His Master's arms were once again around him and that was all that mattered.
"There's really no excuse for my behavior Harry, and I'm afraid that I have to confess that it is all due to jealousy. I won't tell you what I was jealous about just yet, but know that I will do my best to not let my jealousy cloud my judgment. If you wish to move out of my quarters for a bit, feel free to do so. No, I'm not kicking you out. I love you Harry. I'm only now beginning to really see how much you've come to mean to me and the thought of loosing you scares me to death, but I won't let my own selfish desires influence you."
What his Master was saying was making absolutely no sense at all to Harry, maybe he really was as stupid as Master Vernon had always said, but there was one part he did understand though.
"Thank you Master, I love you too. I'm not really sure what love feels like, but I've never felt this for anyone else, so I think it could be love."
Master Severus tilted Harry's head back so that Harry was looking up into his Master's eyes. A soft gentle kiss was pressed to his forehead and Harry smiled at the gesture. He felt safe there were he sat. He'd never felt safe with Master Vernon's arms around him as that had always been when he'd been held down but with Master Severus, Harry had never felt safer than with Master Severus' arms around him, as if nothing in the world could harm him as long as he was with his Master.
Sighing contently, with the knowledge that things would be better now, Harry snuggled closer to his Master and closed his tired eyes in sleep.
"Good night, I love you my Master."
A slight tightening of the arms around him made him smile, and he heard the soft whisper of his Master's voice.
"Good night Harry and I love you."
The fact that his Master had stated it as a promise and not as a confirmation of his own feelings towards Harry, with an 'I love you too', filled him with a rush of joy and something else he couldn't identify, but he knew it was something good.
Harry wasn't really sure what had woken him but he had a very uneasy feeling in his stomach. Soft cursing reached his ears and Harry sat up in bed. That sounded like his Master. Looking at the clock on his bedside table, Harry could see that is was just after three in the morning, and no where near time for them to wake up.
The sight that met him as he entered the living room, would forever be planted in his brain. His proud, stubborn Master was on his knees with one arm held close to his chest, and the fingers closed in a fist, while the other hand had a death grip on the forearm close to his chest.
Harry could see the pain in his Master's eyes and the expression on his face, but was helpless with what to do to aid his Master.
A spasm overtook his Master and the hand which had been holding his left forearm fell away, as his Master crumbled to the floor. Harry could just make out the beginning of what he knew was the 'Dark Mark'; glowing a brilliant red as his Master fell to the floor.
He was at his side in an instant, and pried the fingers wrapped around the bruising flesh away. His Master opened his eyes when he felt Harry's hands on him, but could say nothing as he was too focused on not screaming to trust himself to speak.
"What's happening? Is it Voldemort, is he calling?"
Harry felt truly helpless in their current situation, as he didn't know what he could do to ease his Master's suffering.
Panic set in as Harry realized that his Master had lost consciousness. He remembered seeing his Master with a bottle of relaxing cream mixed with something Harry hadn't been able to identify, a few weeks back, and realized that his Master had probably used that every other time Voldemort decided to torture him through the mark.
Harry searched each and every cupboard in their quarters, but he couldn't find the salve his Master had used. He even entered his Master's bedroom – something which he had never done before, as he had been expressly forbidden from doing so when he'd first come to live with his Master – but at the moment he thought that the situation warranted his breach in that agreement.
Nothing. There was some relaxing cream but none of the relaxing cream his Master had mixed with some other potion. Harry didn't know what his Master had mixed it with every other time, and so he was really helpless and disheartened about what else he could do, or as the case was, that he could do nothing.
Picking his Master's head up off the floor, he summoned a pillow which he put under his Master's head. He just sat there idly stroking his Masters' hair in order to sooth him in any way possible.
When another spasm ran through his Master's body, Harry gripped the arm with the Dark Mark tightly. The instant his fingers touched the mark he heard hissing in his head. The hissing became words as Harry focused on it and he realized that Voldemort was chanting something, something which was causing his Master terrible pain. His Master.
Harry focused on the voice in his head and hissed back at it. "Leave him alone! He's not yours anymore. He's renounced your ways and will never follow you again. Leave him alone!"
Harry could feel the shock coming from the monster who was doing this to his Master, but just fought harder as Voldemort started fighting back against him. Harry pushed with all his might against the presence he felt in his mind, and as soon as it was gone, he focused all his attention on building a shield. He realized that even though the voice had been at the back of his mind, the source had actually been the landscape he found himself on. There were symbols painted on the ground but Harry couldn't decipher a meaning to any one of them. He focused on building the shield all around the symbols on the ground. There were hundreds of them, but when he at last finished, he could see that it had formed a sort of dome that would keep anything out and away from those symbols. Nothing could touch it from the sides, from above or from below. It was completely shielded.
As Harry realized that he had accomplished what he had wanted to do, fatigue rushed through him and his mind went blank as he felt his body fall to the ground and loose contact with his Master.
End Chapter 13
So, what did you think?
AN: The 'landscape' Harry found himself on was the spell Voldemort used to create the Dark Mark.
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