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Reviews for The Line...Crossed

By : Witchcraft
  • From RandH4ever on September 15, 2007
    "I'll call you Hermione." Couldn't you think of anything more original than that?
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  • From ANON - Anon on June 11, 2005
    What happened to Ron?
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  • From ANON - Ohimesama on January 21, 0000
    aww that was so sweet and yummy all in one! it was worth the wait! ^_^

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  • From ANON - Sage on January 11, 2004
    Nooooo! Don't ever end this story! Okay, I'm done. What's up with Harry's kids?
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  • From ANON - Perry D. on January 10, 2004
    Wonderful story and I do hope this continues. Harry and Hermione's children sound very interesting, especially the one sorted in Slytherin. More chapters would really be nice.
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  • From ANON - Macy Gray on January 04, 2004
    Awwww! Poor Hedwig and poor Harry. Ron will get his! *Shakes fist angrily*
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  • From ANON - Blackrose on January 03, 2004
    Great story. Keep it up. I hope Ron doesn't cause too much of a problem and hope Snape shows his true colours.
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  • From ANON - Sage on December 27, 2003
    My cheeks from all the sweetness. I kid, nice to see them happy together. And having sex. ^^ Good update.
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  • From ANON - Sage on December 07, 2003
    Godric? Well, that last chapter was different...keep the chppies coming. =)
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  • From ANON - Macy Gray on December 05, 2003
    Good stuff. Even though I'm furious for the way Ron treated Hermione, I hope he can be 'saved' and Harry and Hermione still stay together.
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  • From ANON - Angelina Weasley on December 05, 2003
    Well, glad to know Ron's wacko for a reason. I actually feel terrible for Ron now that I know he's being manipulated. And Godric Gryffindor added too? Wild story but extremely likeable. Keep the chapters coming, okay?!
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  • From on January 21, 0000
    Please finish that. that was so realistic i could almost feel them.
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  • From ANON - Sage on November 17, 2003
    Killer update! Harry and Hermione loving each other is just so damn adorable. Still would like to know what the hell is wrong with Ron? Why is he acting like that? Update again real soon, please. ^^
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  • From ANON - Perry D. on November 15, 2003
    AW! The chapter was sweet. Harry and Hermione in love is adorable.
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  • From ANON - spikeprop on November 15, 2003
    Okay, I am a creative writing major in college, and I thought I'd give you some feedback you can actually use instead of just critising you as some of these other reviewers have done. First of all your characters need to feel more sympathetic. I see that people are angry about the fact that characters are different. This wouldn't be a problem if you took the time to delve more into Ron's character. WHY is he beating Hermione? Why is he different after the confrontation with Voldermort? Secondly, pacing pacing pacing! Most of the story is in summary, so THAT'S why it feels like it's running too fast. I felt very detatched reading it. I felt nothing for any of the characters because it was in summary. The way to combat that is to go back to the beginning. Don't just tell us that Ron's been different. Have Ron and Harry interact in a scene. Draw out the part where Harry discovers Hermione's being abused. Add a few more scenes in the story in general. You're dialogue is really good, and I think if you add more scenes with dialogue, the story would vastly improve. On the other side of things, I like the idea of the story. I'm all for fanfics where Ron's the bad guy. I'm a Slytherian symathizer, and I love seeing the good guys go bad. I also like the pairing. I really like how you write Harry. He's good without annoying me. You have a good start here. You just need to revise a litte, and you could have a wonderful story.
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