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Reviews for Temporary

By : sabreenthequeen
  • From ANON - Michelle Day on February 02, 2005
    Hey, screw the guys who think your 12, cause i like the story (and i'm 18!!).
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  • From ANON - LadyMalfoy on February 02, 2005
    GAH! This is a good one. I was kinda like..."What the hell is this when it first started out but now i can tell that you're maturing it up. It's so much better! I hope you update soon!!
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  • From ANON - h on February 01, 2005
    h
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  • From ANON - Shmee on February 01, 2005
    I want more! Please give me more. *gets on knees* I beg of you I need more.!!!!
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  • From ANON - --- on February 01, 2005
    i don't think its a bad story at all, its better than reading all that smut.
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  • From ANON - rie on January 31, 2005
    it's not over yet right? coz you made every chapter looks like the end..with draco's sweet words :)
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  • From ANON - Rei on January 31, 2005
    This is definitely some of the worst, most confusing writing that I've ever read. You make many spelling and grammatical errors in the first chapter. These are things that even a spell-check would catch. If you are serious about what you write and wish to improve your work, I suggest getting a Beta for your fics (hopefully someone who has been around for awhile and actually knows what they are doing!).

    Not to sound too harsh, but I agree with your other reviewers: this sounds like a Harry Potter/Clueless cross-over! I know it is important that every author have their own style, but I would suggest reading LOTS of other fics before attempting any more of your own. See if you can't emulate your favorite authors a little bit. Or e-mail them and ask for writing tips.
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  • From ANON - it\'s so totally kewl!!! on January 31, 2005
    Like, OMG, it's Harry Potter in the land of dumb-ass valley girls. Since when did Hermione get stupid? how old are you? 12? 13???
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  • From ANON - stag on January 28, 2005
    *gooey* Is there more?? *holds up bowl*
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  • From on January 28, 2005
    love it
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  • From ANON - anon no more on January 28, 2005
    Very good Draco/Hermione. I loved him kicking Ron's a@@.
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  • From ANON - tygress on January 24, 2005
    Are you going to continue? I really hope so, I was really enjoying your story.
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  • From on December 26, 2004
    0o0o, that's nicely done. The narrative is a bit strange in some parts, but overall I like it muchly. Is there another chapter coming? Lovin' it,
    x~Beki~x
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  • From ANON - krisy on December 24, 2004
    OK that was great But are Draco and Hermione ever gonna have an actual relationship or become public. PLEASE KEEP WRITEING
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  • From ANON - tygress on December 21, 2004
    I enjoyed Delightful Pain, but I'm really enjoying this work. I can't wait for the next installments. Your writing is clear and draws the reader in. Brava on a good fanfic.
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