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Reviews for Malfoy\'s Mate

By : anonnomore
  • From ANON - CWolf on April 11, 2005
    I can barely get through this, the sentence structure is just terrible. The short sentence fragments the plague your story really disrupts the flow of your words. The characters and plot are devoid of any development as well. I love D/Hr fics but this one lacks everything that draws the reader into liking the pairing. Your story need an incredible amount of work.
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  • From ANON - Kiri on April 11, 2005
    Also - It's "enema", not "enigma". www.dictionary.com is calling.
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  • From ANON - Kiri on April 11, 2005
    Your characters are either totally OOC or flat and devoid of personality. I agree with Stratyllis - Hermione has NO character in this fic, and she really could be replaced with a blow-up doll. Veela!Draco is missing his Draco-ness, and thus appears very flat and boring. As for your Snape/Pomfrey thing... Uh, what's with that? They're both completely out of character.

    I don't understand why you made this a Draco/Hermione fic at all to be honest, seeing as you took away any shred of personality the characters once had. You could replace each protagonist's name with another character from the books, and the personalities would fit just as much - want a Veela!Flitwick/Lavender Brown fic, anyone? Just use Word's find and replace feature! Also, throwing in special powers and wings for everybody just reminded me of magical-girl-anime shows... And everyone over the age of eleven HATES magical-girl-anime.

    For an example of a GOOD (albeit seemingly abandoned) D/Hr fic, search for "Adamo Fidelitas" by Pixiezombie. Compare your work with hers, and see where you've gone wrong. >_>
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  • From ANON - Doodle0876 on April 11, 2005
    Can you update a little faster? Lol, I really really enjoy yor story!
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  • From ANON - Anon on April 11, 2005
    this fic is really disturbing.it gives little thought to the pleasure of a woman and allows rape and abuse and things that are both disgusting and disturbing. its revolting

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  • From ANON - Anon on April 11, 2005
    wow, i wanna see more flash backs of the school... I wanna know exactly what Hermione's Training was.

    How come she only remembers it when she is sleeping?
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  • From ANON - Susanna on April 11, 2005
    Great chapter!! Can't wait for the next one. One thing though...I could do without the Snape stuff. Lots of Draco/Hermione would be better!!
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  • From ANON - LadyMalfoy730 on April 11, 2005
    OOOH! Update soon! I love it!
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  • From ANON - Hanna Delacour on April 11, 2005
    I hope hermione can get some control back... It is so hard to watch her have to give up her free will to draco. I really like this fic so please update soon!
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  • From ANON - LaLa on April 11, 2005
    Yes! You FINALLY updated. I love this fic.

    Honestly I thought the last chapter was a little scarry and a little uncleared. Where in the world did that school come from? Was this intantional on Draco's part? Please clerify that. And what does Snape has to do with all this? Anyway, I hope that Draco takes his human form soon. As much as I love a jelouse and controling Draco, I think it's too much. Ordering Hermione to empty her blader... What happened to her request during the bonding ceremony? Didn't she ask for her free will andlove?

    Continue soon. I can't wait for more.
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  • From ANON - Becky on April 11, 2005
    I dont understand the school part... but freakily enough i found myself being turned on by it.


    please update fast!
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  • From ANON - lazy on April 11, 2005
    wow. continue please.
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  • From ANON - Anon on April 11, 2005
    ENEMA!

    SO NOT SEXY. Not because it's squicky but it's not does not convey anything this reader would enjoy. UGH!
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  • From ANON - liz on April 10, 2005
    OMG please update soon I need more!!!
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  • From ANON - REI on April 10, 2005
    I find this last chapter *very* confusing. Also, an engima is a mystery: an enema is fluid inserted rectally.
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