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Reviews for Consequences

By : Aline
  • From MotekElm on May 12, 2017

    Excellent story. Has a plot, sex, romance and battle. 

    2 frustrations:

    The grammar and tense switching.

    The idea that H would get off of being raped. Just no. But having gotten passed that, it's great.


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  • From Trelweny on August 17, 2012
    Why is it that I am always more upset about Ginny not being understanding and therefore a poor friend than when Ron does the same or worse?
    Sorry... rhetorical question.

    Wonderful story. Thank you for having a Draco/Hermione story during the war that though their roles were important for the winning of the war they remained not as important in defeating Voldemort than Harry. I like seeing that aspect of the canon retained in fanfiction. I was really impressed with the involvement of Wizarding politics. Such potential differences between the muggle world and the wizard world have always been at the back of my mind considering the differences described in the original books; always makes me think there must be more that we could not see or were not told.

    I was amazed how you basically had a consensual non-consensual first interaction. Not many could pull off something like that but it worked, with Hermione explaining how she wanted to give herself to Draco but not necessarily that way. I loved how Draco in retrospect figured it out. Although slightly disturbing I couldn't help but laugh.

    The dance was one of my favorite scenes and I absolutely loved the use of Flower Language in the proposal. The exchange of partners was beautiful and entertaining.

    I'm always pleased when Draco takes a 'too proud as a Malfoy to bow' stance against Voldemort. It's probably my favorite reason to read Draco fanfics -searching for stories containing it. Thank you.

    I really enjoyed reading this, and I'm really impressed that you did so well in a language that is not your first! Sure, there were a lot of errors scattered throughout or misuse of words/tense/grammar/etc. but I've read far worse in native speakers' works! You did a really commendable job and I'm sure that a beta or editor would have smoothed over most of those errors no problem.

    Thanks so much for writing!
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  • From ANON - Palsville on May 01, 2010
    It was an interesting story. Good start decent middle and great ending. I think the beginning could of had a bit more filling out about Hermione's want of Draco before the Halloween event, but that is only a personal opinion and since that was originally a oneshot I can understand why it wasn't done like that. Good Job!
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  • From ANON - ml on March 15, 2008
    This was a very enjoyable story! I really didn't like the beginning but it turned out fabulous! I can't believe Ron, he's just nuts! Ginny too - although not as much as Ron.
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  • From ANON - jara on August 15, 2007
    this story was BEATIFUL!!!!i really liked it! i even stopped reading other stories just to finish this one! greatly written! your english was great, better than most =) so compliments on that. the only exception was a few of the conjugations.. but i mean it.. only a few. not like it matters.. cos the story in its entirety was FABULOUS!!!
    i LOVED the fact that you kept draco in character.. not like other stories... and that ron turned out to be a prat.. i dont like him. at all. and that you made it believable for harry to fall for someone other than ginny.
    so yes. all in all.
    Fu-reat job!
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  • From ANON - Jem on June 08, 2007
    This was a marvelouss tory! I always keep my eye out for a nice long story with plot! ^_^ I loved your portrayel of Draco and Hermione. You kept things fairly slow and let the relationship build. Thanks for such a great and HIGHLY entertaining story. Jem
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  • From ANON - Baby-gal on May 20, 2007
    V. good.
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  • From ANON - Anonymous Gal on May 18, 2007
    Oh dear lord, you just HAVE to end up following those damn cliches? It was so good, and I thought you were one of the few who wouldn't do this...but no. I was wrong.
    Fuck, you just ruined the story by following the whole "Draco and Hermione fall in love. They keep it a secret. Hermione gets pregnant. Everybody knows. Blah.Blah.Blah..." Jeez.
    I just wish that someone would NOT write a cliche like that.

    Adn you had so much potential too. Don't expect me to read anymore of this.
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  • From ANON - Anonymous on May 18, 2007
    Very good. I really like it!
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  • From ANON - XRazorXBladeXKissesX on May 17, 2007
    (I used my penname from ff(dot)net)
    I have one major comment to make on this: please, please, please use proper grammar. Sentences are not supposed to be six-seven lines long. I hate to say this, but whoever is beta-reading this is doing a poor job. The spelling in okay, you need some work wording (i.e.: bitten ought to have been written "bit") as well as tenses. But the major problem is the fact that a paragraph several lines long consists of one sentence. Every paragraph is written like this, and it's not good. I suggest you learn how to break paragraphs into sentences. Yes, there can be more than one sentence in a paragraph.
    That's the only major complaint I have.
    Onto the content: I LOVE the story in whole (when I ignore the grammar issues), and I think that you describe the emotions and scenery well. You've managed to pull me into the plot, and I really like it.
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  • From ANON - Stag on May 06, 2007
    I really enjoyed your story. As I got to the later chapter, I kept thinking back to the beginning. There's a very interesting progression in the characters. Good job!
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  • From lukablack on May 05, 2007
    Me encant
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  • From nonentity on May 04, 2007
    btw, I really like Chapter 23 in particular--Hermione and Draco's interaction over Quidditch, Draco teasing Harry that he needs lessons in snogging, Draco remembering Ginny's cattiness, and Harry's intro to wizarding politics.
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  • From jamieblye on May 04, 2007
    I just found this story today and read the whole thing. It was brilliant! Wonderful characterization!
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  • From nonentity on May 04, 2007
    4th paragraph--house-elf experimenting depression--experimenting should be experiencing

    you have such great detail in this epilogue! I love the maze with the fake monsters in particular. The accidental magic in the sandbox was great too. I also like Hermione trying not to overwork Winky, Hermione taunting the portraits, and having to fool the Malfoy Manor anti-contraception spells by going on vacation. Hermione blasting open the door of her prison was pretty funny too.

    Have I mentioned how much I love the maze with fake monsters?
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