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Reviews for The First Heartbreak of Severus Snape

By : Ms_Figg
  • From ANON - Ms_Figg on November 21, 2005
    Hi all. Yes, this was a really ugly story. It had to be ugly to start him on his path. This was a young Snape age 17, never in love before
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  • From ANON - Provocateur on November 21, 2005
    Ms. Figg,

    I have enjoyed many of your other stories, as your Snape/Hermione series is particularly strong. My praising them is saying a lot, considering that I am primarily a Draco/Hermione shipper. Still, I must convey that I was a little disappointed in this one for several reasons, the main reason being how you chose to deal with sensitive subject matter.

    I think that a majority of Adult Fan-Fiction fans enjoy seeing mysterious male characters take on strong sexual personas. Power is an aphrodisiac, and seeing a reserved character transform into a Sex God is often fun. I consider myself a Snape fan, so although your take on Severus as a porn-star extraordinaire doesn't necessarily jive with my idea of him - sexual or otherwise - I see definite merit in your generally well-written and creative prose.

    My main problem with this story is how you have taken your formerally sexually expressive interpretation of Snape and transformed it into something far uglier. In this story, Snape is a full-blown misogynist. I understand why he would be hurt over Sabrina's betrayal, but at the same time I have to agree with the other reviewer who said that the pedestal he put her on reeked of masculine sexual insecurity. In his mind, the ultimate woman is one who shuns sexuality unless it is experienced within the confines of marriage. The most troublesome part of this is that your story excused - nay, celebrated - his vengeance and his condemnation on and of her. Must a good woman always be one who is asexual? Certainly you do not believe this to be true, judging by your past works that sing the praises of unconventional sexuality in both men and women.

    Snape's abhorrent revenge did not seem the least bit justified. It was cruel, unncessary, and ripe with chauvenistic pretense. He had a right to be angry, yes, but perhaps that anger would have best been expressed in a less brutal manner. Still, what troubles me most is the glorification of Snape's sexist ideals. In this case, I have to say that I sympathize with your somewhat vapid and poorly developed OFC, not your insecure hero.

    Still, I look forward to more of your Snape/Hermione stories in the future. You do have a gift for writing unapologetic erotica, and I generally do enjoy your work.
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  • From ANON - Hypatia on November 21, 2005
    Charmy-

    In the third paragraph of the first chapter, it's clear that it's Snape's decision to hold back, since she's of such "good character." Translation: Snape's more than willing to put her on the "Nice girls don't put out until marriage" pedestal. We are given no hint as to what SHE wants; hell, she might just be shy! And from the way the poor thing responded to Black (without a lust potion, no less!!) I think if she was such an adherent to the White Wedding Cult, she would have fought his advances. I can't help but see her as a victim and a pawn used by both Snape and Black.

    I think Severus' (mal)treatment of her might have been more acceptable had she deliberately played games with his head and with his heart, say if she was in on something with Black from the beginning, but this appears not to be the case.

    The whole intrigue of Severus Snape is that you just never know how much good he has in him, or how much bad. Personally, I like to keep guessing.
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  • From ANON - Hypatia on November 21, 2005
    I think the problem I had with this story was Snape's way overdone Madonna/Whore complex. The readers are led to believe that it was HIS decision to hold back, and that the girlfriend may have been more than willing to take their relationship to a deeper, physical level had the subject been broached. Which makes what he ultimately did to her all the more vile, from an ethical standpoint. We know that he redeems himself via Hermione's love some 20 years in the future, but I was a little uneasy with this portayal of him, and was glad the girl (who struck me as more of a Hufflepuff than a Ravenclaw) didn't end up with a Snape who was so full of misogynist sexual issues.
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  • From ANON - Maela on November 21, 2005
    Wow...poor Severus. And poor Sabrina. :( I can totally see something like that pushing him into Voldemorts ranks though.
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  • From ANON - melusinesara on November 21, 2005
    great fic, as always! wonderfully dirty..who in their right mind would screw Sirius instead of Severus anyway?! ;)
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  • From ANON - Maria on November 21, 2005
    Ooooooooooo.....you do have a naughty mind! That's why I love your stories so much! Wow, I love how you write Snape - I can't wait for more from you.
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  • From Ms_Figg on November 20, 2005
    Maria: Thanks for that. I've changed Lucius to an OC, Felton. Man, I've got to get my timelines straight. sigh. Yes, bad Severus is soo soo good.
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  • From ANON - Maria on November 20, 2005
    I like this so far. I can definetely see Snape becoming such a bitter man from the combination of being a social misfit in school along with being betrayed by a woman. I love how you write Snape in all your stories - very forceful and dominant. BTW - according to canon, Lucius is older than Severus by about five years (I can't recall if it was book 4 or 5 that the Daily Prophet stated he was 42 - I think - and JKR said in an interview that in book 4 Snape is 35 or 36.) I know it doesn't really matter to the story, and I like stories that have them as school friends, but I'm just making an observation. I'm really looking forward to reading the next chapter - abusive Severus makes me so horny I'm sure it's not healthy!
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  • From Ms_Figg on November 20, 2005
    Charmy so right! Thank you. Changed it to Lucius Malfoy. :)
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