Adult-FanFiction.org : Harry Potter

Reviews for Beyond the Veil -- COMPLETE

By : LaBibliographe

From Crittenz on April 20, 2008
I was like.. Are they gonna do it? Are they gonna do it? Are they gonna do it? Darn it all.... Their not gonna. At least not this chapter. Their magic you think they could use a basic healing charm or something GAH! At least Hermione is coming around. *waits impatiently as always for the next wonderful chapter*
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From chickaboo on April 20, 2008
I just want you to know that my heart was beating a mile a second while I read that. Good grief....Lucius has got me seduced! lol Looks like Hermione is going to get to do all the caressing that I'm dying to do eh? Lucky bitch...lol! Seriously great update. I also want you to know that I managed to frighten my cat by letting out a happily surprised squeak at seeing an update (I refuse to call it squealing...I have to maintain some sort of dignity....). Did you know that cats are actually capable of the ultimate death glare? Anyway, as always I loved it and I can't wait for more!
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From ANON - maddie50 on April 18, 2008
That was quite suspenseful for a spanking scene. The fact that Hermione's having a good think about whether she could carry out the task turned out to be mental torture for Lucius was very amusing. Sending her off to the bath afterwards for a soak was good thinking. You turned Lucius's wank almost into a religious experience you wrote it so well and he had a bloody good time with his must needed release.
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From ANON - Rini on April 18, 2008
I've just started reading the fic and I have fallen in love with it as I have with all your others!

Chapter 13 (and previous chapters)

"scrambled eggs" yep, definitely got a giggle out of that! Even tied up, Lucius can't be meek or submissive, oh well what can you do?

Spanking Lucius... drool

I really want Hermione to hurry up and realise how shaggable Lucius is and give into the desire... I guess it's because she was so screwed over by Ron and that other one (his name's not important enough for me to remember). Arseholes. Oh and not to mention that evil old biddy and those thugs forcing Hermione into prostitution for their own selfish desires - if that wasn't enough to mess her up then I don't know what is...

Maybe Lucy will help to address those confidence issues of hers...

Did Hermione manage to find a family to insinuate themselves into before her abduction?

Will Lucius be using his actual surname because it might be a little weird if he were to go back into the magical world and meet the Malfoys of that time? Or maybe the Malfoys were still in France during the 1800s??

I don't think Lucius could honestly be expected not to cheat and steal to get money (and property) especially in their position... totally on his side and not any of those unsavoury characters he took from - they certainly wont be needing it now they're running about the Forbidden Forest.

I will be waiting patiently for your next update...

Rini
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From Crittenz on April 16, 2008
I don't think I qualify as a lurker simple because I wait until I read the last chapter available before I review. I like this story. It's a fresh take on things. I would also like to say that I demand more chapters and soon. *nods* Okay so ... can I please have more chapters??? I'm not really good at demanding things. I just can't wait for Hermione to come to her senses and realize that Lucious Malfoy is a georgeous hunk of man and should be slept with at all costs. Plus it wouldn't hurt Lucious any if he told Hermione he wanted to be with her forever. Then she might be a little more receptive to his attention. Have you ever just wanted to jump into a story and slap some sense into the characters. *shakes head* Then again you are the author you could slap sense into them but, it's better if you don't.
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From blueartemis on April 15, 2008
I like that she kind of dragged it out. But yeah, I think he got what he wanted. And she is definitely hooked now. Not necessarily on the caning, but on him. That ass sounded like a piece of art.
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From ANON - doodle on April 15, 2008
Falls - it is a new term for me. It makes sense thanks for adding to my vocab. Your writing is like a present waiting to be consumed. I always to a quite time of the day to savor it.
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From Damiana on April 15, 2008
Hmm...I think I might leave him tied up so that he can't just decide when his spanking comes to an end.

Chapter 13---*readies drool rag*

Hehehe. He got exactly what he deserved...

Hmm. Now I wonder if Hermione will hear Lucius' exclamations and if she'll finally understand what's really going on.

There is such a lovely set-up for more canings in the future...both of them lied. She about the number of strokes and he about his desire for the same.

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From Utopia on April 15, 2008
Hermione, Gryffindor honesty to a fault!

16 for twelve, I like her reasoning!

*snort* scrambled eggs! lol! (which is amusing, seeing as the egg is a female thing!)

She had a ruthless Death Eater tied spread-eagled facedown on her bed and her most pressing problem was how to get his pants off his derriere. well, what other kind of problem are you going to have? Silly Hermione.

Hermione frowned, knowing there was a flaw in his answer somewhere, but she was too interested in delving under his hips again to care. he can't get hard THAT quick, luv, it takes a minute or two to get the blood filling all those little tubes. She wasn't a studier of the sex organs, I see. lol.

one of those elegant, attenuated, swanlike creatures who would be an ornament to his name. Hermione as a major issue with self confidene! She is as elegant as graceful as any other woman! She's no ugly duckling either! I don't think she'd want to be an ornament for him! Rather an equal. She needs him to give her a confidence boost!

He wanted those sixteen swats, a good wank, and then he wanted to sleep for ten hours. In that order. yep, sod all the pureblood crap and manners, this bloke needs some "alone time". lol.

My other half is a bottom worshiper, but goodness knows why he'd worship mine! lol! Though, I'd worship Lucius's arse, and ANYTHING else on that body!

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From Utopia on April 15, 2008
What number am I on? 12?

skin flautist! *snort* Don't want a sax player then? I can audition twice! And the other members of the orchestra can get in line behind meeeeeeeee!

*right, sensible hat on*

Firstly, oh your word usage makes me shudder! LITERALLY! I quite simply ADORE a good vocabulary! You should give us a word-in-a-chapter with a definition at the end, then we can advance our vocab with you! Learn as you have fun and-all-that-jazz!

His mind is running at a mile-a-minute and it's gone of on a tangent and not come back! He's got the wrong end of the stick completely! (Typical bloke!)

It isn't as if this spanking is a sexual game with rules and codes of conduct - this is pure brutalisation and Hermione is terrified! I know his psychological state at that precise moment isn't brilliant; but what he's doing is degrading and uncalled for! He needs Hermione to trust him, not be frightened of him! The tentative friendship they had has just been thrashed away!

I have a sinking feeling that Hermione getting her own back won't involve the fear that Lucius bestowed on her! He's going to enjoy it, and not experience what she has just been through! I'd have cut his hair - messing with his looks would hurt more than smacking his arse!

Hermione stood by the bed watching Lucius
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From Scarybearhair on April 15, 2008
Aw LaBib, I myself would love to be the one tied. Of course you probably already guessed that, simply from my writing. lol But I must say, hot damn, what you just wrote is so frickin
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From tambrathegreat on April 14, 2008
Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you. That was just too... Lucius and his hand. um... I think I better not say anymore. I hope Hermione gets some of that goodness later. Great job.
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From Phreakdom on April 14, 2008
I love the way you write Lucius. I really do. He
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From bluezauza on April 14, 2008
"This was a man in his absolute prime, a fully grown, fully developed male with a masculine package that promised untold delights to any female lucky enough to be his choice." hihihi

Sweet Merlin....what a vision!!!!
*giggles like a fool*

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From ladyravenna on April 14, 2008
When you mentioned there being a lemon ahead, I was hoping that Lucius and Hermione would finally get together. LOL. Ah well, seeing Lucius from Hermione's point of view was equal enough. And I agree with you 5 seconds is Lucius' limit for meekiness, a second more, it would be sort of weird and make you wonder if he went through a complete psychological change.
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