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Reviews for Ashes of Armageddon

By : emilywaters
  • From ANON - whitehound on August 07, 2008
    Very good, in a sad way - he's so terribly insecure, and it goes all the way back. It's going to take a long time for Harry to teach him that a) his body really isn't that bad and b) he doesn't have to be perfect to be desirable in any case. I foresee a major emotional upheaval over the glamours coming up, because Harry will want to really see him, but then the scars will freak him out. Yet, he has the power to make Severus feel better about them.

    Some typoes in this one -

    'The third letter simply had two words:
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  • From ANON - kunitsu on August 07, 2008
    Wow that was incredibly sexy and sweet. I love how Severu's insecurities are starting to be put to rest and he is letting himself be more open to Harry. It amused me that Hermoine told Severus that Harry would be dropping, not neccesarily that but the way she said it. Keep up the wonderful work
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  • From ANON - Black Nighshade7 on August 07, 2008
    Wonderful. How they interact with each other..., how nervous Severus was when he heard Harry would come to his house, just wonderful, perhaps Severus will learn to open up too...
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  • From ANON - qwerty on August 07, 2008
    Yay! Severus is beginning to relax again!
    Awesome chapter!
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  • From SoftObsidian74 on August 07, 2008
    They are so adorable...but in a really sexy authentic way that reminds me of being in love for the first time. Your Sev is just so endearing. I loved the way he was running about worrying over Harry's arrival and trying to play it cool by not looking like he cared. You've managed to keep him in character but cut into his innards and expose his frailties without degrading his character. Bravo on that Emily, it's not easy to do. Also, I love how you incorporate Hermione into your stories, well, really all of the characters from the HP universe, because this is their universe, and use them to help the plot and growing love between the two main characters along. Sev trying to please Harry was just hot, and the fact that he wouldn't let Harry please him makes me wonder if that has something to do with the bond or his inability to fully let go and be vulnerable just yet. I know it may be too soon for him. I loved loved the rose bit. Sev sacrificing pain and his skin to make sure Harry wasn't hurt was so beautiful and sexy. It always amazes me the way you manage to convey the simplicity of power dynamics within the relationships you create, whether it's overt S&M or an seemingly vanilla interaction, you still manage to make it all quite powerful even if it's buried just below the surface. AWESOME chapter : )))
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  • From ANON - Jean Lamb on August 05, 2008
    It just struck me that the slave bond affects people differently (d'oh!). With Dumbledore, it only gave more scope for manipulation; with Voldie-Harry, more scope for hellish torture.

    But with Harry and Severus alone, it seems to give more scope for love. I rather like that. And I really like Harry letting Snape take the initiative. Any other way, and Snape would be curled on the floor having horrible flashbacks to other situations in his past, perhaps not just Voldie!Harry ones.

    Ok, he'll end up curled on the floor having horrible flashbacks anyway, he won't be able to help it, but this time there will be someone with him who truly cares--which is, alas, a first in Snape's (with the likely exception of Poppy).
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  • From ANON - moma on August 05, 2008
    I'm very grateful for this chapter because I believe now that this story won't be finishing yet. (I Really like Ashes..., I don't want it to end).I've got the feeling that you have something waiting for us...hopefully not bad for our heroes. Ah!, and I did't understand what you mean with the very last sentence?As always, GREAT JOB.

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  • From ANON - whitehound on August 05, 2008
    Incidentally, there's another thing which might be helpful for Neville, although at this point Snape won't know about it (but Harry does). In the books, Luna managed to remain detached, level-headed and practical while Hermione was being tortured.
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  • From Leentjef on August 05, 2008
    THIS WAS A VERY VERY GOOD CHAPTER
    KEEP GOING AND POST SOON
    BYE BYE
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  • From Leentjef on August 05, 2008
    post ssooonnn
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  • From ANON - Fairner on August 05, 2008
    ch47 dont kno what to say really lolz XD
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  • From SoftObsidian74 on August 04, 2008
    The passion is mounting...but in a realistic way considering their histories together. I'm glad we got a chance to see what is going on with George, Lee, and Oliver. So sad about George and Oliver..not sure what to make of Lee but I'm glad Sev found out, even if it was to ease his knowledge that he and Harry aren't alone in their misery. Loved that kiss : ) and that they'll be seeing each other more. I'm glad that Sev had a talk with Neville, he really was beating himself up, I guess I understand why, but if he had intervened this story may have turned out totally different, I hope he comes to realize that. Can't wait to see where they take this and how they will get there considering these little awkward conversations are bound to riddle their interactions for a long time. GREAT update : )
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  • From ANON - whitehound on August 04, 2008
    Much better! And just the right thing to say to Neville, not only because it's true but because Neville will now be able to feel "Severus and I are in this together, we have a shared experience" rather than "I let Severus down". And since Neville is seeing Snape (rightly) as a suffering hero he can't now see himself as a villain or a coward for doing just what his hero had to do.

    Should you ever feel inclined to do a tidy-up there are three typoes in this chapter, btw.

    doing the decent thing and avert his gaze - mid-sentence change of tense, should be "averting" not "avert".

    he decided he may as well remain - mid-sentence change of tense, should be "might remain" not "may remain".

    Dust had been removed from he world - "the world" not "he world".
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  • From ANON - kunitsu on August 04, 2008
    Wow that was just wonderful. I love how you deviated Neville from his usual mold in fanfics, where he becomes brave but still the shy Neville even after the war. I find it quite refreshing, I just hope he doesnt do anything to Harry. This story is truly something else
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  • From emilywaters on August 04, 2008
    Well, as for why I re-wrote the last chapter, there are two reasons.

    1) The transition between a painful discussion and happy moments was too abrupt for my liking. (Emotional believability)
    2) I wanted to directly connect Severus' conversation with Neville to the discussion Severus had with Harry. (Moving the plot forward)

    That said, I had spent a good week re-writing this chapter, had a dozen versions of it, and I am quite ready to let it be as is at this point... Flow or not, I don't think it breaks the mood of the story in any drastic way, or presents some OOCness that wasn't there before.
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