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Reviews for Potion Mishap

By : rachelmary
  • From Bonecollector on June 09, 2008
    Love this story!
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  • From Shadow12300 on June 07, 2008
    please update thank u
    ja
    shadow
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  • From Bonecollector on June 07, 2008
    very interesting start. I'd really like to see where this goes. will you tell me when you get the next chapter up? please
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  • From anniea on June 07, 2008
    well what's going to happen. you've tickled my interest but where is the rest. update soon *kisses*
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  • From soloflamelady on June 06, 2008
    oh that's not fair you can't stop there update update update.
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  • From Dreamwind on June 06, 2008
    I think this could be a good fic, but it needs a lot of work. First the chapter can't even be called a chapter because of how short it was, that will turn off readers. Second is that you skip around a lot and don't add any details about how things got from one point to another. Like when the potion covers Harry, there isn't any mention of that. he just suddenly itches. I would suggest getting a beta reader, it helps a lot to catch things you might otherwise miss.

    Sorry if this sounds like a flame, it's not. I just thought I would give you some suggestions to make your story better.
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  • From LydiasTravel on June 06, 2008
    Great start. Update soon! (Small note: writhe doesn't have an 'r' on the end)
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  • From Hambares on June 06, 2008
    Nice start. I can't wait to see if what Harry's reaction is. Will he cry at all the strangers?
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