Adult-FanFiction.org : Harry Potter

Reviews for Eternal Mistakes On The Spotless Soul

By : CryingCinderella

From ANON - sevsgirl on October 13, 2008
Cinderelly, Cinderelly
Night and day it's Cinderelly
Write an update, get them coping
Make them happy, not so moping

Through the reading and the crying
She always keeps us hoping

She writes around in circles
Till she's very, very dizzy
Still they holler

We need an update Cinderelly!

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From ANON - cranky monday reviewer on October 13, 2008
Congratulations, you've made a Hermionescicle.

And now I have to go and she'll have to stay frozen til tomorrow.

:::pouts:::

cmr
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From ANON - cranky monday reviewer on October 13, 2008
Ahem.

Hermione's dying while you take your time updating.

I hope you're happy!
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From ANON - sljh on October 12, 2008
As bad as things are for her, as much as she didn't plan this pregnancy and thinks that adoption is the responsible thing to do, given how fucked up her life is right now, this is why I think she should keep the baby:

"She panted, closed her eyes and wept silently. The baby was beautiful. Covered in placental goop and little bits of blood and hair, the baby was beautiful, her baby. Hermione shook her head, closing her eyes more tightly than before. She would not be a single mother. She could not allow herself to become attached. But before she could protest, the doctor had placed the squealing bundle into her arms. It cooed and made gurgling sounds for a moment before closing its eyes.
...Hermione nodded, wiping the tears from her eyes. It would not be easy to give the boy up, but it was something she had to do."

She wants to keep her baby, instinctlively. In her heart, she wants to be a mother to her child. All this running away and being flippant and sarcastic is just a way to distance herself from the pain. And this is probably the worst pain of everything that she's been going through for the past few years, and that's saying a lot.

Severus should Legillimize (?) her while she's recovering from her hypothermia, assuming he actually rescues her. His excuse is to see what information he can find out. His SLAP IN THE FACE will be the reality that her life has become, no matter how hard she tries to keep doing the right thing. Heh, maybe he'll even feel a tiny twinge of sympathy, and will decide to help her out with a few things instead of trying to bring her down like everyone else.

In this story, I don't think it's remotely possible for there to EVER be a true HG/SS ship. If there is, it will be a very long time coming, as in many months or years. But what CAN be accomplished is he can be a little bit of a hero in that he can help her find that stupid plant and help her with her research to find the cure for lycanthropy, so that she can clear her name and get back on her feet. And if he had any heart at all, he would help keep her child if that is what she truly wants in her heart, damn the circumstances, and help her get that, whether he wants to have anything to do with his son or not. That's about the only thing that could remotely redeem him in this story.

But reading about Hermione's downward spiral and Snape's apparent satisfaction, not just indifference, is really depressing. IDK
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From TriniMinx on October 12, 2008
Hmm, this Lenore. I don't think she's as good or as great as she seems. But she strikes me as having more backbone and being more "real" and less of a smitten-whore, than pretty, little, dead, selfish Nalina (who I want to still whack over the head). But, as much as Lenore doesn't bother me. I don't want "Baby HermSnap" (yes, I've named the unnamed baby) going to her. I want Baby HermSnap w/ Uncle Harry, who I do trust! So can you add that to my plot bone in the snow? Prettttyyyy please?

Ugh, your Severus makes me so mad, it's unreal. I get all bothered when I read about him opening his mouth, its enough for me to want to stop reading, but then I don't because I'm really liking the story so far within recent chapters. So it's like this bad addiction at the moment. Stupid, stupid, stupid Severus. Can you write me into your chapter as Sasha the Defender, come to take her stilettos and beat Severus upside the head, hoping to knock sense into him??? Argh! I hate hating him because he's my favourite HP character EVER. Grrrr. Lordy, woman!!!

Hmm, I like to think Lucius got smashed in the church's wine cellar, LOL. That would be too funny.

Goodness, I feel so sorry for Hermione. The poor girl :o/
It's like she WANTS to die...But its understandable considering that she feels all alone in the world without anyone who she thinks cares enough about her. Not to mention she is conflicted about her baby because she didn't get an abortion. I think that if she had the means, she would have kept it and moved on with her life. I really want her to find the root, get her life on track, take her baby and live happily ever after without the asshole you created that IS your version of Severus Snape!

Yes, yes, I've decided, the rest of your charcters besides Baby HermSnap and Hermione (and perhaps Uncle Harry) should all go to hell and battle it out in Wizarding Jerry Springer-land!

I'm expecting you to make him a complete asshole when he finds her in the snow. And then I'll hate him more...that seems to be your style so far. So I'll be surprised if he seems remotely human if and when he finds her all icy and blue.

Poor Hermy :o(

kk, update soon!

Sasha
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From ANON - sljh on October 12, 2008
yeah well....Lenore raising Hermione's baby isn't all that different from Nalina raising it...

I have really enjoyed this story so far and there are a ton of twists and turns but I'm don't know. It just seems to be about everyone else and Hermione is nothing but a plot point, a tool, for each of them. She's continually villianized and victimized and nobody really seems to give a shit, except to lay blame on her. Now she's moments from death and nobody seems to broken up about that either.
The only happy ending I want to see is Hermione coming out on top: getting the plant, making the potion, curing lycanthropy, deciding to keep her baby, and leaving all those fucked up people far behind while she goes and gets a real life, where she's happy. All the rest of them can continue with their soap opera lifestyles and leave her alone.
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From ANON - Electrical Storms on October 12, 2008
Woo-hoo! More chapters! ::pops more popcorn to settle in for some good reading. Gives CryingCinderella more chocolate as an incentive to post more chapters today. The good stuff, not Hershey's. Godiva chocolate, baby!::

Dun-dun-duuuuunnn! Lenore wants the baby. I don't get any warm and fuzzy feelings from her seemingly philanthropic attitude. I didn't get any warm and fuzzy feelings from her, period. Her tacky comment about Severus going after Hermione when Nalina was hardly cold for a week now was delicious, though. Severus must really be badly distracted to not have at least threatened to hex Lenore for that nastiness. ;0)

I'm glad Severus (well, eventually he will, when he resolves the Hermione matter) is thinking and wondering about the timeline of Nalina's pregnancy. All sorts of squicked-out possibilities there. ::shudders::

Gah, poor Hermione. In the throes of what has to be post-partum depression along with all the other misery heaped on her right now. Buck up, girl, you're a tough cookie.

Nalina isn't (or wasn't...oops) an innocent, doe-eyed young thing, methinks. Lenore clearly isn't. Lenore can't be offering to take Hermione's child out of the goodness of her heart. (Well, DUH.) Something sinister is afoot...calling Harry Potter for help!

Hey, Hermione! Get out of that damned snow and kick Lenore's ass! While you're at it, kick some sense into Severus Snape, too. :0)

I can't wait for more!

::sends more Godiva chocolate to CryingCinderella:: There's more where that came from. ;0)

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From Heidi191976 on October 12, 2008
Another great chapter. I can't wait to read more.
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From catysmom1028 on October 12, 2008
I like it. Please update soon.

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From KellyJCR on October 12, 2008
I know I shouldn't be to surprised that Hermione has all but given up on herself and her life but really, she is a gryfyndor. i am really waiting for her to buck up the courage and be that headstrong know-it-all she can be. I know the guilt of Sevs situation is weighing on her greatly but, deep down if she thinks about it there is something more to the story. She just has to realise that. I am also wary of the fact that Lenora wants the baby. Im sure itsnot for her Nalina the baby has nothing to do with her and I get the feeling she doesn't care much for Sev. Is she looking to seek revenge on him some how I can't put my finger on it but, she is up to something. I am still trying to work out the rest of the plots swirling on my head. I could go on for days but alas, I shall give you and my kitty a break. Well done!!!!!
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From neelix on October 12, 2008
oh...so lovely to read a long chapter - I got through half a mug of coffee!

Brilliant plot twists...twisting like a twisty, turny thing - I look forward to how you are going to tie up all the frayed ends!

And thanks for doing the responses in the reviews section - it makes it easier to enjoy the story.... for me, anyhoo!

Looking forward to the next installment, same time next week.... *cue music*
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From CryingCinderella on October 12, 2008
NarcissasSister- I'm glad to know that I'm helping convince you're husband of your madness. Hehe. Poor kitty, *gets the kitty life resusitacion kit ready* There you go, another chapter on it's way, and I thank you for complimenting my genius.

Heidie191976- Ever the detective, good thinking. Hope you enjoy the next chapter.

ArabellaSnape- SO much for you not complaining. ;-) But yes, poor Hermione!

ApollinaV- *comes speeding back in, tank half full* Look, it's better than totally empty. *smirks* Yes, earth shattering conclusion of the Dumbledore variety can hardly ever wait til morning. And don't worry, no amnesia, and well, let's hope there's no kidnappying, though with the Malfoys involved you can never be too sure. Don't worry, this isn't fondue, so no cheese. Just trying to keep dramatic plot structure flowing, hence the soap reference of the Dumbledore chapter. I don't feel like this is a soap, although it did occur to me that Lenore is one of the biggest soap tricks in the book, but I hadn't thought about it like that when crafting it at the time. *grumbles about the heap of questions which I'm not answering* Yes, well everyone has a name, but for the moment, this baby does not. And that will come to light later. I'm sure. I hope. Hang in there and keep reading!

desirae- glad that you're enjoying the fact that Nalina is not an elephant. Though she is dead. Very dead. I recommend chocolate for PMS in the future, dear.

neelix- hehe! I was suddenly reminded of Days of Our Lives, when you said that. The only show I used to watch (that and Passions, but Passions was so bizarre I never considered it a soap) but alas, you won't have to wait long for the new chapter. enjoy it! And as per your request, I'm trying this whole review on the review board thing...though it's dodgey, and characters may have to suffer for my annoyance at having to do so.

HermioneSnape- Yes, he's contemplating. As should you be. :-p

Sljh- Agendas and angles all will be revealed. And thank you for appreciating the work. I got some heavy sleep and am now ready to get back to sound and light design, as well as producing this next impro show, and a few other things...possibly like updating this story. ;-)

LyraAphroditeMoon- Finally someone you like! :-p Yes, well I like Lenore better myself, I think, but that's only because she has a pretty bird name. Thanks for continuing on with the story! I'm killing you? *snickers* And your plot bone? *tosses it toward the big snowy field* There you go. And the baby is with the ministry, though all that may change soon, if it hasn't already. Sasha, is it? Yes, well, do try and keep those questions bubbling in your mind, as I'm not answering any of them! :-p

RedWritingHood- Bad Molly indeed! And I thank you for the compliment, I do try to craft twists and turns whenever I can. Do continue on, and find out what happens to this ragtag band of people up in the mountains.

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From TriniMinx on October 11, 2008
Oh lordy.

She's gone again? You're killing me.
Where is Hermione's baby? Where is my plot bone??? Why isn't he with uncle Harry???
Miscarriages, eh? Whatever. You need longer chapters :o)

That being said, why was it so important for Nalina to get married before Snape and pretty, little, dead Nalina had their baby? Why was it so important that Lucius needed to get drunk in the wine cellar of the church after the wedding was stopped?

I'm curious though, what did Ginny fine? Why is it so important that she didn't tell Draco what she read and Lucius stopped her? And what does that all have to do with Severus' marrying pretty, little dead Nalina before she gave birth?

And what the bloody hell?! Where did Hermione go? again?!! Geesh.

I must say though, as I said before, I'm glad this emotional abuse is over for now. The mystery and adventure sets in and I'm a happy Sasha :o) Literally can't wait for your next updates!
Yay!

Make it soon (as long as you get your homework done!!!)
:o)

Sasha
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From RWHandLoraineProductions on October 11, 2008
Oh, you do spin a mighty interesting tale. A secret twin, a wondering mother and a grieving man. I cant wait to see what happens next...and Molly! BAD BAD Molly!

Red
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From TriniMinx on October 11, 2008
Ooooh!!!
A twin! That IS exciting.
I still say stupid Severus, I hope you make him apologize to Hermione at some point. I'm still hoping for that; the dumbass. Grrr
I like ths Lenore. She seems better to me, than pretty, little dead Nalina.

:o)
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