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Reviews for Inter Vivos

By : Lomonaaeren

From ANON - SP777 on February 14, 2009
con't..

Whoa!!! O_o

BIG Mistake alert!!! BIG..BIG Mistake!!!

I didn't mean 'Changing of the Guard', I meant 'A Potion named Desire'.
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From ANON - SP777 on February 14, 2009
about #16....

1. In the words of Lucy from Charlie Brown, ''Aren't they the CUTEST thing!''
on a scale of 1-10, the ''Awww..'' factor was a....8 1/2. You can do better than
that.

2. So, what DOES 'Inter Vivos' mean???

3. On the story idea, from what I'm thinking I think it would be best in the tone
of how 'Changing of the Guard' was like, a little bit of drama...a little bit of
witty sarcasm.

As a matter of fact, it WOULD be best told from Draco's POV, because I've noticed that you see more through Draco's eyes than Harry's. Besides, this is about Slytherins wanting just bit of R-E-S-P-E-C-T.

It would be like a little lesson in irony...and I'll let you figure that one out.

Now, here comes the stretch of the imagination, what moves could Draco do?

Hmm....good question, here's an answer.

Let's say Draco is on good terms with his father and during the summer, Draco
flew with his father to the States, since he had business over there and Draco IS
curious to know what it's like over there. While over there, Draco comes across the wonderful, but BRUTAL sport that is football and he's amazed at how similar it is to Quidditch.

It would be fascinating because first he's watching it on television and second, he's having a brief, but brilliant epiphany on how to train his Beaters & Chasers.

Oh, by the way, might as well make Draco captain of the Quidditch team,
otherwise it wouldn't work as much. Plus, if you don't know much about football have a guy do a mini commentary of a recent game for you on paper, then do some changes. ANYWAY that's just part of how to get it started.

Then, you fill in the blanks.

NEXT, comes the Quidditch matches and Gryffindor is surprised by how Slytherin is giving them a run for their money. There are just TOO many close calls, but Gryffindor is still winning because of Harry's Seeker skills.

Then, you fill in the blanks.

NEXT,...and this is your decision on how you would fit this in....Draco sees on
television again, or magazine with moving pictures, moves & twirls performed by gymnasts/divers and wonders how he can incorporate those moves on a
broom. As a matter of fact, Lo' you could invent a move solely ''created by'' Draco
that would go into Hogwarts: A History. :-)

But, it has to be grand. Oh, Then, you fill in the blanks.

NEXT, somewhere in there, you develop a romance. Hmm...how would you
do that and it wouldn't involve drama? Well, that IS what makes a good writer
how to create a romance when the atmosphere ISN'T charged with angst & drama.

...and I'll end it here for now. So, does that help if you go for it?
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From serenagold on February 14, 2009
Awww... their embrace on the roof was so wonderful. You've made the rest of my day. ^^
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From Mangacat on February 14, 2009
Well, that really done some good at last. I love how you portray their growing feelings for each other the way they absolutely DON'T figure out what they're feeling might be because it's completely outside of any range of possibilities they are considering. And in turn we all know where it's headed and can't wait to get there, while you dangle it in front of us like that. Just, extraordinary writing...
Cat
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From ANON - SP777 on February 12, 2009
about #15...

I have a plot idea I want to throw your way, please consider it for a POSSIBLE
story.

I was reading the section on the Quidditch match and how Draco was musing on
how Harry was good on a broom AND how good some of the Gryf' players were.

Okay, that's all well & good, BUT no matter how good you are most of the times,
is it possible you can mess up a few times?

So, this story idea popped up.

*What if Draco realizes that the reason the Gryffindor team are good, because of the fact, they work as a UNIT. No matter how much the Gryffindors get on each other's nerves or fight, they are comfortable with each other.

Which is completely different from how Slytherins are. Meaning...since the children come from aristocratic pure-blooded families, the mentality would be something
close to ''all about me'', which Draco displays the most. Therefore, even though the
Slytherin team play together, they are busy using underhanded Slytherin tactics
to crush the other team, instead of developing their strengths & relying on each other
to strengthen their weakness...and watching out for their fellow team mate.

Plus, Draco needs to learn a different way to fly against Harry. I don't know if
it's because of the fact Harry is smaller since he is fast, but Draco needs a new technique where he would HAVE to be daring for a change.*

ANYway, that's what came to mind.

What do you think? :-i
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From ANON - DTDY on February 11, 2009
Well one thing that Severus and myself has in common: we hate and I mean HATE to be wrong.
Draco and Harry has some mending to do...
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From ANON - MewMew2 on February 11, 2009
Excellent. Please update this story once more when you have the time.
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From LadyPiro on February 11, 2009
Ohhhh DRAMA!!

That's okay though. I have faith in Harry and Draco and the hope that they'll have had hot sex by the end of this story.

I luv your updates. They come at the best times.

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From Mangacat on February 11, 2009
HOLY crap. no might not have been the best way to go about it... as smart and cunning as they are, those Slytherins keep doing the elemental mistakes because they don't dig where the abuse actually REACHES... MAN.. I wanna throttle them, all of 'em.
Cat
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From callistianstar on February 11, 2009
I didn't figure everything would turn out all right right away, but I still am glad that Severus knows. (Dumbledore would nod and stroke his beard thoughtfully and say something about how Harry had to stay with the Dursleys anyway.) I have an intense dislike for Dumbledore in the canon sense as well, so his own contradicting statements of saying to Harry he'll reveal everything (in the last year) and then now not even telling him about the Order, or seeing him...ugh. But I am glad nevertheless that Severus tried to take some kind of action. (
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From serenagold on February 11, 2009
:o

Draco fucked up his relationship with Harry!! Oh noes!!

I hope he finds a way to fix it! :(
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From ANON - qwerty on February 10, 2009
"Left alone in the classroom, it occurred to Draco that that might not have been the best way to go about confronting Harry." - understatement of the year

It's frustrating that Severus wants to help Harry but can't completely removed his warped frame of mind that Harry is just like his father. argh!
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From Mangacat on February 09, 2009
Well, well, well... I mean all along I wondered how an intellectually high and so sharply intelligent man like Severus manages to entangle himself so far into his own arrogance and ill-advised bitterness as to completely ignore the blatantly obvious and make exactly the same mistakes he accuses Harry of in his own mind. Yet, he's only human I guess and at least, he fell real hard now, finally.
Well, there is your opening, Sevie, use it!!
Cat

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From LadyPiro on February 08, 2009
Oh my god. I think this is going to end up being my favorite story by you. The characters are so well thought out and even with all the complex emotions you manage to weave the tale so well and awwwwww Draco is soooo cute! And while Snape is being...Snape-y I still forgive him, be cause he can't help it. And you said berk. That made my day. You rock.

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From ANON - MewMew2 on February 08, 2009
Excellent job. Please update once more when convenient for you.
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