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Reviews for A Time To Give In

By : spiderkiller
  • From ANON - Gwen on September 27, 2009
    Great story. one of the best ss/gh I/ve read.
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  • From Elphaba on May 27, 2009
    Great chapter!
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  • From Elphaba on May 27, 2009
    "Vixen, meet little Severus. He has been waiting a very long time to meet you." Best Line ever Great Story
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  • From chickaboo on May 27, 2009
    Oh that was great! Thanks so much for sharing it!
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  • From dreamer24 on May 27, 2009
    I really liked your story, so please don't take offense at what I am about to say. I think that you have a lot of potential as a writer, and you could benefit from working with a beta. You have a lot of easily remedied errors, and a beta could help you with those. If you're interested, you can search at www.thepetulantpoetess.com/beta.php or at perfectimagination.co.uk for a beta. There are some really good ones listed on both sites. But you know, for a first story, you did well and I commend you for your effort.
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  • From dreamer24 on May 26, 2009
    Yay, a lovely follow up.
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  • From chickaboo on May 25, 2009
    Wooohooo! You're writing more for this one! I'm so happy! I can't wait for more!!
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  • From soldiersgirl0709 on May 25, 2009
    You know what...I liked it. =) I havent reviewed anything in a long time, havent had anything to say about much of what Ive read lately but this was a nice little bit to read before work on a rainy Monday morning. Your writing wasnt so bad, dont worry about an occasional small type-o, its fan fiction, its supposed to be fun!! Mind you I'd have a different opinion if it were a published work, I hate finding type-os in a book =) but thats what paid editors are for! You did a great job, Duckie!


    Happy Writing!
    S_G
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  • From DawnEB on May 25, 2009
    So, how many people did they wake up? I'd love to see a morning after chapter :)
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  • From ANON - sevibaby on May 24, 2009
    I would like to see you continue with this story. I really liked it.
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  • From ANON - Daygonna on May 24, 2009
    This was a fantastic story! I really hope you continue it and don't just keep it as a one-shot. There's so much more I want to know.

    The ending so warming. They both wanted the other, but didn't think the other reciprocated. I fully support a few more chapters!
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  • From spiderkiller on May 24, 2009
    neelix,

    It's quite ok. I thank anyone who offers good and construtive critism. I knew I should have gone searching for a beta, but I had no idea where to look! lol

    I know my email shows up as hidden but: to anyone who is free and able to help me I beg you (on hands and knees)to email me with any advise at spiderkiller007@yahoo.com

    Thanks again neelix. Honesty is greatly appreciated for any future stories I might do.
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  • From Angie30 on May 24, 2009
    Very Hot and Erotic! Excellent job *Fans Face* Certainly has brightended my morning. :)
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  • From neelix on May 24, 2009
    oh and I forgot to say - you can't keep this hanging as a one-shot! Too many unanswered questions...!! What Happens Next... ??
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  • From neelix on May 24, 2009
    Hi there.... First of all I want to say that I enjoyed this story and the unresolved sexual tension between them was quite evident! It really kept me reading. There is a "but" though (and I hope you take this in good faith. It's no critisism, you only have to read some of my own unbeta'd stories to know that I was once in your shoes!) You really need a beta to help you with your punctuation, grammar and sentence construction. Even when you re-read your own work, there may still be errors that you have missed... we all do it. That's why beta's exsist! If you need one, try The Petulant Poetess and look in the forum, or maybe advertise here for one? I'm sure someone will help. I hope you do, because the content of your story was very, very good... and hot! Oh man... I wanted to be Hermione, face to face with Severus... *fans self*....
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