Click Here!

Reviews for Inamorato

By : Pheobi
  • From thrnbrooke on August 04, 2010
    Sooooo need chapter 14!!! I'm hooked!
    Report Review

  • From ANON - Toni on August 01, 2010
    interesting story - a bit different and that is very hard to find... please add me to your alert notifications. Keep up the good work!
    Report Review

  • From ANON - ursulaB on August 01, 2010
    love this story so much!! I cant wait for the next chapeter!
    Report Review

  • From BreathlessBliss on August 01, 2010
    Hey Fallen, another great chapter. I love Luna! That line was perfect so funny. :) Well untill next time. ~Bliss
    Report Review

  • From ANON - Nour on July 31, 2010
    Interesting; I'll be looking forward to another chapter! I like creature fics like this and yours seems to have a unique twist to it. I really like how you worked the whole "finding-out-what-creature-he-is-through-process-of-elimination" scene; it had a more believable quality than other stories that just go, "Boom, your a ___ Harry!"


    There are some inconsistencies that I wish to point out, simply as constructive criticism. First, Hermione is obviously against Harry and Draco's relationship, I get that part, but in an earlier chapter (not sure which one, but I know it was the one where Harry sat in Draco's lap during Potions class) you wrote something along the lines of Hermione hugging them both and eager to be a part of their "wedding." My advice, write out all of your characters and their stance in the piece you are writing BEFORE writing the story itself. It makes things so much easier, plus I know when I write, I sometimes get caught up in one scene, then completely forget about that important scene when I get caught up in another. It's just a lot easier to reference a little footnote, "(Hermione = Bad)," than to go back and rewrite a chunk of your story.



    Another thing, please slow down when writing relationships. Take a breath, relax, then try to visualize this, "The mean bitch/bastard from high school that has humiliated and insulted you and your peeps for over half a decade, has suddenly invited you to their birthday party." Would you go? Would you honestly take the time to dress up presentably, then go out and purchase a gift with your own money (because showing up without a gift is just plain uncouth, not to mention, terribly awkward when gift opening time comes), for some stuck-up little snot whom you can't stand? No, you wouldn't! You'd sooner gate crash with aforementioned scorned friends and tear that place up than put on a gracious face and celebrate said scumbag's birth! My point is, when writing Harry/Draco stories especially, you must ease into it. I do appreciate the element of attraction in a fic, but even Lady Lust cannot wave her magic riding crop and "poof", everything be peachy keen.



    I feel like I'm coming off bitchy, but I'm honestly not trying to. It just really threw me for a loop when I read the first few chapters and I was like, "Yay! A great beginning, some intrigue, suspense is building for Draco's appearance, a little in-depth knowledge of creature-status." Then, " H: -sniff,sniff- Mmm, you smell yummy. D: Really? Thanks! Hey, wanna get hitched, since you're kinda attached at the hip there? H: Sure! That way I get to smell you all day! H + D: Yay! Love!" If you can imagine, my eyes were spinning going "what the hell just happened?"



    I won't speak for other readers, but I like quite a bit of angst in stories, maybe a little pinch of heartbreak on the side. Anyway, I like where you're going with this so far, especially since I'm getting the vibe that Harry is gonna be the bottom (call me crazy, but I can't read anything without Harry as a sub, lol). Please don't be angry with me, I really wasn't trying to come off sounding Hermione-ish!




    My best wishes,
    Nour
    Report Review

  • From NightLo on July 30, 2010
    ...Any more specific we need to know about Peri? Such as mating ritual or period, perhaps?
    Report Review

  • From ANON - KillingProphet on July 30, 2010
    I sat down on my laptop to read your story, got through the first chapter and when I clicked on the next one I actually got my lazy arse up to go to the house computer because the chapter took too long to load. Which is a huge thing for my because I really am that lazy.
    You have an amazing thing going, I love how you are discriptive without being overly so; no offence to E.E. Cummings but too much detail is well, too much.
    The only thing I can find falt with is how Draco talks. He uses a lot of sland words like 'cause, I can understand Harry saying it because he is laid back and didn't have a formal upbringing. Draco on the other hand had a strict childhood. That seriously is the only thing I can possibly find wrong, and seriously thats like finding out that there's an invisible scratch on the wall. It's amazing, so please, oh please, update soon.
    KP
    Report Review

  • From erospandora on July 30, 2010
    woot flying
    Report Review

  • From ANON - kit on July 30, 2010
    love love love this story! I cant wait for the next chapter please make it soon! Will Harry fall at all and have to have Draco catch him (snickers)anyways please update REALLY soon!
    Kit
    Report Review

  • From ANON - tamikolee on July 29, 2010
    Yay, so great to get an update :)
    Report Review

  • From thyladyx on July 29, 2010
    yay!!!! update!!!!...stupid Hermione...shes supposed to be the smart one honestly. Great chapter. I love this fic so far and can not wait to see more of it...please don't take so long to update next time?p retty please with a cherry on top?
    Report Review

  • From ANON - Anon on July 29, 2010
    i love the by plays between every one i hope you update soon i really love this story


    all my love The Maiden Lyra
    maiden6of6the6dark@yahoo.com
    Report Review

  • From ANON - Kiba on July 29, 2010
    woot was wondering when the next update would be i wonder whats going to happen with hermione and i wonder how fast harry will take to learn how to use his new wings
    Report Review

  • From ANON - KitixUnrest on July 21, 2010
    This story is awesome. I love that you give your own spin on real lore. Not to mention I love selkies. The one thing I question though is why would Harry want to fly quidditch with his wings spread? The bludgers would be hell I'd think. I dunno. Please add me to the update list. :)
    Report Review

  • From BreathlessBliss on July 17, 2010
    Hey hun, what an amazing thing to come home to after a long trip another great chapter! Drunkin draco is soo cute and funny, I can just picture him stumbling around talking about all the injustices (ie shopping problems, broken nails, cute gryphendors to bed, etc.) hehe... Anyways I can't wait to see if they can really get to know eachother without many more fights. :] Many cookies for another chappie please please. :) ~Bliss
    Report Review

T.O.S. | Content Guidelines | DMCA Info | F.A.Q. | Facebook | Tumblr | Abuse | Support | Contact | Donate

Click Here!