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Reviews for Dementor Kiss

By : Ladtheove
  • From Danyealle on October 19, 2011

    Please correct your disclaimer


    It does not contain one of the two required elements. Namely, the part in which you state that no profit is made. It must be clearly stated in that you make no money/profit.


    Failure to correct the disclaimer will cause your story to be hidden from public view after a week from the date of this warning, butnot deleted; you can still correct your disclaimer, which will then be unhidden again as soon as possible. Continued failure to correct the disclaimer will cause the hidden story to be deleted after 30 days of being hidden. Re-uploads of hidden stories are deleted immediately, no warning given.

    Below is a link to the Terms of Service in its entirety

    http://www.adultfanfiction.net/tos.php


    In addition, the next link listed is to the FAQ regarding disclaimers.

    http://www2.adultfanfiction.net/forum/index.php?showtopic=3560

    The FAQ on how to change your disclaimer can be found here:

    http://www2.adultfanfiction.net/forum/index.php?showtopic=18857


    You can also review our news post on the topic for a complete explaination, found here:
    http://www2.adultfanfiction.net/forum/index.php/topic/17420-site-news-11-6-10/
    Please also take a few minutes to read the content guidelines.

    http://www.adultfanfiction.net/guidelines.php

    Please remove this review once your disclaimer is corrected.




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  • From betelgeuse on October 16, 2011
    OMG you're back!!! I didn't hope for it anymore. So glad I was wrong 'cause I really, really, really love this story. The plot it's great, I've never read something like this. Azkaban and the Dementors always fascinated me, but there aren't many stories about them as real characters, obviously. And Draco as a white Dementor is melting me.
    Please don't stop writing this story. Hope to read another chapter soon. Kisses
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  • From magentasouth on October 16, 2011
    I'm guessing its a linguistic issue, since you don't seem to be a native speaker, but your writing style is very difficult to read. It seems like you have a decent plot and you are conveying action in a relatively gripping way but the actual phrasing etc is very distracting in places. Please don't be upset by this but I suggest getting a beta to iron out the language kings in the final draft. E.g. when talking about Hermione you have used he instead of she several times. At first I thought you were talking about Harry or Ron. Then there are some places where I did not actually understand what was supposedly happening because it was not clear from the context. e.g. the part about the ministry - scream! and disapparate. Then you missed necessary words in places - e.g. when you are asking to be shown to malfoy's cell.
    All in all - its quite frustrating since the vague impression of the story is enough to make me want to read it, but reading it requires a LOT of processing.
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  • From JoyGrim123 on April 02, 2011
    I absolutely love this!
    The sole idea of this story is as intrigueing as it is facinating...!
    The white dementor concept is wonderful, as well as this whole Azkaban tour the trio are having there.

    True, there are some grammer errors, but none which interferes with catching the idea of each chapter =)

    Can't wait for the next chapter! -Joy.
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  • From SilentDreamer on March 30, 2011
    Woho new chapter!! I'm am very very intrigued with Draco, I knew he was the white dementor! Also they where quite a few spelling errors, suggest you re-read the chap again. Great work! KUDOS can't wait for more, I am dying for some Harry/Draco interaction. ;p
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  • From SilentDreamer on March 14, 2011
    Yay!!! ;) Can't wait for the next!!
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  • From betelgeuse on March 14, 2011
    Great story! I love it. It's intriguing, misteryous, really well written and full of suspance... and Draco was there only few moments in the first part... I can't wait to see him more!
    Update, update, update. Kisses
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  • From SilentDreamer on March 14, 2011
    YAY!! Love the chapter, can't really wait for this story to actually star I'm really looking forward to the White Dementor! KUDOS once again and please update soon. ;)
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  • From bloodshound on March 13, 2011
    dementor animagus?...cool
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  • From Cinder1013 on January 26, 2011
    I really like this story. Great plot. And you've done a beautiful translation.
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  • From SilentDreamer on January 25, 2011
    Loved this story, very interesting. Can't wait for the second chapter!! ;)Kudos~~
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