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Reviews for Draken Blood

By : Morbid_and_Sexy
  • From ANON - Anon on August 26, 2012
    I think that it would be good if Tom was one of Harry's mates and wasnt as evil as dumbs made him out to be.
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  • From ANON - PhotoshoppedBeauty on August 26, 2012
    I tried to keep reading, really I did but its just not doing it for me. The story seems entirely to rushed and the characters aren't that well developed (compared to RotD). And I know this is your alternate take on Rise of the Drakens, but it would've been nice to see your own plot line and words instead of using StarLights. And yes I know she gave you pernission to use her story as inspiration, but I just would've liked to see your own personal ideas not hers.

    But good luck with your story anyway. Hopefully this will help you further your writing skills.
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  • From LadyFreak on August 26, 2012
    i like how this story is going. I still think you are rushing through it. I'm interested in seeing how the DL fits in. I'm glad StarLight_Massacre gave you permission though. Its a very interesting storyline :)
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  • From ANON - booboo on August 26, 2012
    first i congratulate you for your attempt however i fear this story does not live up to starlight massacre's rise of the drackens as the story is less interesting in the fact that you get to the resukt you wabt far to easily.
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  • From ANON - Saphire Phoenix on August 26, 2012
    I do like this story, but I think that you could do with a little more character developement. The people can feel flat or one dimensional if you don't get into their heads once in a while. I do love that you made Hermione a Draken. She usually gets overlooked in these types of stories.

    I personally vote for Johnny and Severus to be Harry's alternate mates. I adored the visual reference that you gave.
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  • From ANON - heartstar on August 25, 2012
    more please!
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  • From ANON - Anon on August 25, 2012
    I'm going to point out something to all of you crying foul on this poor girl. If you look at her story on FFN (THIS story posted there), StarlightMassacre has reviewed it twice.

    Chapter 1, 2-27; mentions PMs between them
    Chapter 2, 3-6; nice bit of concrit

    Now, if SHE thought this girl was plagiarising, I'm quite sure she would have said something. As the story is now posted here, I'm also certain she would've reported it herself.

    We've emailed StarlightMassacre to confirm the existence of permissions. We're waiting for a reply. As the review board on fanfiction.net STRONGLY indicates permissions do in fact exist, there is no need for staff to take punitive action against this user. There is also no need for people to drag this author through the coals without checking facts first.



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  • From ANON - Ajablue on August 25, 2012
    I hope you don't feel my first review was a flame. I honestly didn't intend it to come across that way. I am trying to give a different perspective that you can hopefully use to improve your writing. Criticism can help us evaluate ourselves, though I can get defensive about it myself.

    Anyway, here is another bit of question this new chapter has brought to mind. Aside from the fact that Harry is an underage wizard, who though gifted in defense, hasn't had the best teachers in his years thus far, I am interested in how you plan on Harry's pregnancies playing out. Do you see him having the same level of difficulty as Starlight does in her story? If so, how will he still be able to teach when he is heavily pregnant?

    You might also consider giving your audience more of a look at the thought processes and motivations behind your characters. If we know what an individual is thinking/feeling it can go a long way in making us sympathize with the person and then we can be more accepting of the actions they take.

    Honestly, I am probably going to bow out at this time. I do wish you the best of luck with this story and your writing in general. I personally am just finding the pacing too frentic and am having trouble suspending disbelief with everything you've set up so quickly.
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  • From ANON - Ava on August 25, 2012
    I wasn't expecting Hermione to be the first mate! It's a bit....interesting I suppose. I thought it would be Severus, hell, I would've even guessed Neville if he was in the running. Intersting indeed. Can't wait to see what else you come up with!

    Cheers!
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  • From ANON - sm on August 25, 2012
    Wow... what a rip off. Obviously a poor copy of The Rise of the Drackens by StarLight Massacre, who adopted the story from Jayde Alyxandre, who's original story was called Dragon Kind. The author of this mess should be ashamed of themselves. I hope AFF pulls the story and bans this plagiarist.
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  • From Aromanight on August 25, 2012
    love it! cant wait for more, please update again soon, this is off to a really great star :)
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  • From ANON - aislinn on August 25, 2012
    I've never understood the need for character bashing, or the obvious complaints directed at Rowling couched in a fic(i.e. Harry's rant at Dumbledore), but it seems to be a popular past time. I think ajablue has some excellent, constructive criticism for you - give it some thought, as it's meant to help you improve your writing/storytelling.

    I'm out; the Draken creature is fascinating, and I'd be interested in reading another story about them, but not a re-telling of the story already being told, especially from the tired "Dumbledore is manipulative and evil, as are the main Weasley characters" meme.

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  • From ANON - Anon on August 25, 2012
    Another "The Rise of the Drackens" Copy?
    Is that really necessary?!

    You even used some of the lines from the original...
    Congratulation: You are the fifth, that is to lazy to think for herself...
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  • From ANON - thrnbrooke on August 24, 2012
    Way cool!
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  • From ANON - heartstar on August 24, 2012
    Ohy I love this! more please when you can.....
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