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Reviews for A Magical Foursome

By : Allyrion
  • From OmniViceUser on January 04, 2020

    Maybe not another Chapter, but a Sequel could be nice. One with more Plot intended, and Relationship development


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  • From ANON - Diana on July 16, 2014
    update soon!
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  • From ANON - pooh on April 26, 2014
    loved it! I like to see the good guys get "it" sometimes. hehehe
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  • From ANON - MDR on March 30, 2014
    Very nice story! But it does sort of demand at least an epilogue.
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  • From ANON - Diana on March 04, 2014
    Update soon!
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  • From ANON - Luna/Wind on February 25, 2014
    I loved all three chapters of this and will definitely check out your other work. I do think an epilogue is in order though. The entire time I read, I wondered if it was real, or if it was a fabrication of the Room. I hope it is real, and would love to read of the morning after where Harry discovers the truth one way or the other.
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  • From GertrudeFlint on November 05, 2013
    A competently-written story, firmly within the conventions of the mass market vanilla-straight-male-fantasy porn genre. Does what it says on the tin: a reader of that genre who wants "Room of Requirement foursome" will find exactly what he expects, and be satisfied. Just as many tourists are satisfied when they can confidently expect McDonald's food to be exactly the same, anywhere in the world: when the aim is to stick to a formula, delivering the standard elements and being predictable counts as success.

    A cut above average for AFF fics, simply because the spelling and grammar are good. This writer could easily get freelance work in some erotica categories, if he can churn out this kind of material reliably; there certainly is demand for it.

    - Canon inconsistency: list of Harry's sleeping roommates in Gryffindor leaves out Neville Longbottom.
    - Typos:
    "Ginny noticed Harry drawn's gaze"
    "hair and body shaking appealing as she approached"
    - Consider naming the girls in the summary, HP/GW/HG/LL, to make ships perfectly clear for potential readers. Adding the word "harem" could bring in readers searching on that term.

    The story's narrated in third-person omniscient by a voice that clearly isn't Harry's; it's older, more formal. (If I had to match it to any HP character... probably Percy Weasley.) Once the sex gets going, the language sprouts additional adjectives and the standard porn-assortment of nouns for genitalia, becoming more descriptive without sliding into purple prose - except for one line, more likely to inspire hilarity than arousal: "His manhood was a fine specimen, a teenage rod of maleness..." [reviewer pauses to ROTFLMAO]

    Noting the writer's ability to make the story flow smoothly through a formulaic sequence: blonde/brunette/redhead cliche, check; detailed comparison of breasts/nipples/pubes, check; F/F oral with explicit statement that it's all for the man's benefit, check; exaggerated semen-output, check; explicit and hyperbolic semen-appreciation, check; etc. All rolls along with no awkward transitions, to a definite conclusion with an option to continue.

    Overall rating: Exceeds Expectations. Readers who are seeking this type of porn should be very happy with this story, especially if further chapters are similar.
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  • From ANON - jhh on November 03, 2013
    Hi!!!

    I just came across your story!!! I really love the story of Harry with Hermione,Ginny and Lunna!!!

    I hope you continue this story so that we can see the four of them pleasuring each other.

    Again, thank you for this amazing story and I hope to see you in next chapter!!
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  • From saiyoakikaze on November 03, 2013
    Love your description of the characters and each of their different physical characteristics. Are you planning to expand it because I hoping for some actual action :)
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