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Reviews for Cracked

By : Mermaid-in-a-Manhole
  • From VeltsuVI on December 25, 2019

    Interested to see what Harry is going to do with Tonks.

    Also is there going to be more of (sex) slaves? If it's then this maybe should be in threesome/moresome catalogue. If there's only Tonks as sexual slave. (As Dobby and Winky are slaves, but maybe they don't share bed with Harry.) There is Harry/Tonks sub in Het.

     

    I don't know how far this story is in other sites, but if you're planning to put Hermione and/or Ginny to Harry's slaves, Harry could claim them by life dept, he has saved boths lives. (One story before used that before.)

     

    (Don't wait many reviews from me, i don't write these lot, i just read stories)


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  • From Cloudbringer on December 16, 2019

    Chapter 1:

    Top notch. I really enjoyed the way you worked the sudden shift of Harry's personality with something believable. It didn't take me out of the Potter Universe, everything felt organic to it. I also enjoy the new calculating manner he has. I think the only slip up I saw was having Hedwig fly away twice without mentioning her return after the first departure to the bank, unless I missed something. You kept your descriptions and action on track with the story without slowing it down. Everything felt relevant to the story and information we needed to know. I feel that in this chapter you placed a lot of plants for later use. Nice planning. I think I caught them all. Lots of items that will come in useful later when everyone long forgets about them, then ohhh I remember! Nice proof-reading too.

    Congrats.


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