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Reviews for The Wolf And The Prey

By : Lilredwitch
  • From Nghtcrwlr on October 13, 2009
    lol you could totally tell that was RP'd.... almost every sentence started with Severus or Remus xD kinda like msn

    Severus Says:

    Remus Says:

    Severus Says:

    lol it was good though... you need to work a bit more on making it sound more like a fic than an RP though.... unless you purposly went for the RP style then...
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  • From ANON - Anon on December 28, 2008
    I really liked the story line, (and it was hot!) but it may be a good idea to revise the writing style. I know it was a messenger conversation, initially, but it's kind of hard to follow with the tense changing (Severus pushES, then Severus pushED, and back and forth), as well as every sentence starting with either "remus" or "Severus". I think if you revised it and made it more into a regular fic format this story would be awesome! Good job
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  • From MasterofPie on May 14, 2008
    hahah nice fic
    mwhahah possessive Remus!
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