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Reviews for Myrtle Moaning

By : BeefJerkyYo
  • From Gamesofdark on September 23, 2017

    an absolutely brilliant start! i really, really love myrtle as a pairing, please update soon!!! (^_^)


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  • From ANON - Yesplz on October 24, 2014
    More please?
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  • From MacPhisto on March 21, 2010
    PLEASE add a second chapter!!
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  • From HoosYourDaddy on November 05, 2009
    Hmmm, well, it's an odd and interesting premise for a smut story.

    If I may, a couple suggestions: first, Harry's characterization is a bit uneven. He goes from being disturbed by Myrtle to enamored with her too quickly. There's no real explanation for why he suddenly thinks of her as a potential love interest. This is PWP, obviously, but characterization matters in all stories.

    Second, you have a tendency to use Harry's name when the pronoun 'he' is more appropriate. Look back at your paragraphs. If it's clear that Harry is the one performing the action, just use 'he.'

    Good luck...
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