schedule
August 22, 2010 at 12:00 AM
You'll update right? I mean I know the story is creepy, scary, desturbing, sicking and dwon right horrofing so far but it's good. I love it.
schedule
August 11, 2009 at 12:00 AM
XDDDDDDDDDDDDD
YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I wanted to write a scene like this in my BS, but it would have been a bad idea... anyway. Loved the rape scene. And the "Harry-Destroys-His-Balls" Scene. XD That was fucking AWESOOOOOOOOOOME!!!!!!!!!!!
*dance*
Let's see, a few pointers... If you don't need to use the verb 'was', don't use it. I can't remember the exact word, but... 'Macnair was moving above him'. You can easily change to 'Macnair moved above him'. Was stagnates the motion of a story, as it is a descriptive verb and not an 'action' verb.
XD
I'd freak out on the forum, but I'm still not speaking to Marms. *crosses arms and sulks like a child*
YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I wanted to write a scene like this in my BS, but it would have been a bad idea... anyway. Loved the rape scene. And the "Harry-Destroys-His-Balls" Scene. XD That was fucking AWESOOOOOOOOOOME!!!!!!!!!!!
*dance*
Let's see, a few pointers... If you don't need to use the verb 'was', don't use it. I can't remember the exact word, but... 'Macnair was moving above him'. You can easily change to 'Macnair moved above him'. Was stagnates the motion of a story, as it is a descriptive verb and not an 'action' verb.
XD
I'd freak out on the forum, but I'm still not speaking to Marms. *crosses arms and sulks like a child*