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May 22, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Chapter 2 part 2 please!!! How will he change?
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May 22, 2010 at 12:00 AM
I love it already, and one way to destress is to read or write, listen to music, paint, hiking canoeing things like that. usually those tend to help a lot
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May 21, 2010 at 12:00 AM
ahh i see when then you did a good job of making harry seem like harry also i think the diloge flows well and isn't borning pleas keep this story going i can't wait to see how it ends
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May 20, 2010 at 12:00 AM
I didn't find your dialogues boring at all, to be honest I didn't even notice that there was a lot of it until you point it. In other words, I believe you are doing a good job in keeping things fluid and interesting. However, you may want to expand things a bit by maybe describing a bit more of the surroundings, movements feelings, etc. But only if you feel comfortable doing it, I like how your are doing it so far and I'm for sure intrigued by the plot!! :-)
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May 20, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Ack! I can't wait to see what happens next!!!!
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May 20, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Well, I guess my perception of the first chapter may be a bit skewed by my preferences, but I certainly hope that what ever directions your mind has spun off in are fun for the fic!
~Hazel
~Hazel
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May 19, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Thanks for the update! My only critique would be that you could use more descriptors, like your story not being wholly, or mostly, comprised of dialogue. Other than that, I'm still very interested in seeing where this goes. Please keep up the work!
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May 19, 2010 at 12:00 AM
You've had me at hello... But seriously, this is an amazing story, that I'm desperately hooked on and cannot wait to read the next chapter.
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May 18, 2010 at 12:00 AM
You're only a chapter in, and I already find it unbelievably hot. I can only hope that this is heading where it seems to be; I ADORE a strong, dominant Harry. I'm looking forward to seeing where you go with this. Love it; update again soon!
~Hazel
~Hazel
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May 18, 2010 at 12:00 AM
wow and i don't think you made harry o.c. yet anyway no one knows what harry was like right after the final batle and i always disregraurd the epiloge anyway, i really like the way this story is headed so please write more thanks