If I Ever Lose My Faith In You | By : Heliona Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female Views: 918 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0 |
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story. |
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and all related
items do not belong to me. None of the characters belong to me. Most of them
are the brainchild of JK Rowling, and the others are those of Kyizi's. No
copyright infringement intended. Title belongs to Sting.
Rating: PG-13 for the moment, although
it will likely be raised for later chapters.
Spoilers: Philosopher's Stone, Chamber of
Secrets, Prisoner of Azkaban, Goblet of Fire and Order of the Phoenix, and
Kyizi's fic, "Every Little Thing She Does is Magic."
Distribution: Please ask, the answer will
likely be yes.
Feedback: As always. Yes, please. This is
my first time writing from Remus' point of view, so I'd love to hear what you
think.
Yahoo! Groups: Kyizific
Notes: This is a companion piece to Kyizi's fanfic,
"Every Little Thing She Does is Magic." You must read
that before reading this, otherwise nothing will make sense. This chapter
includes all the events in chapters 1-3 of "Every Little Thing She Does
Is Magic", so you'll need to read them first. The pairing in that is
Snape/Hermione, and as such, there will be mention of that in this fic. If you
don't like that, then I suggest you don't read it, although it has, almost,
converted me to that pairing. There is no pairing in this fic (as yet).
Dedication: To Kyizi, since she asked me to
write it!
Special notes: I know that in an interview,
JKR said that Remus was a half- blood, and so therefore would know quite a bit
about the Muggle world, but Kyizi said in her first chapter that "he's
having issues with the Muggle world" so I'm assuming that he's a
pure-blood, and therefore doesn't really know much about Muggles.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Remus flopped down on the sofa, exhausted. He closed his eyes,
but opened them again quickly when unwanted images raced through his mind.
Pulling out his wand, he lit the fire, staring into it moodily for some time.
Finally, he pulled himself
together enough to drag himself off the sofa and into the kitchen. He made
himself a cup of tea, ignoring the pile of dishes in the sink. Staring blankly
out of the window, Remus didn’t notice the tottering dishes until one,
disturbed by his sleeve, fell onto the floor with a crash. Then, he jumped and
dropped his mug as he spun round with his wand out.
It took him a full minute to
realise what had happened. He repaired the smashed plate and dropped mug, and
cleaned up the puddle of tea on the tiled floor. “This is ridiculous, Remus,”
he muttered to himself. “You’re a nervous wreck. You need sleep.” There were
many times that he had told himself that, but it made no difference. The more
he slept, the more he dreamt. And he didn’t like his dreams.
“You need to talk to someone
about this. You can’t go on alone,” his inner voice continued. Remus growled.
He was extremely disconcerted that his inner voice sounded a lot like Sirius.
“I have to go on alone, there is no one else,” Remus said aloud, making himself
another cup of tea with shaking hands. “Great, I’m talking to myself again.”
Remus heated up the leftovers
from the previous night’s dinner, and carried them into the living room.
Curling up on front of the fire, he opened his case notes and began to read.
The mission Dumbledore had sent him on was getting complicated, and Remus
wanted to make sure that he had all the facts before barging in recklessly.
“Although you’ve been doing a lot of that lately,” his inner voice argued.
Remus clamped down on the voice.
He needed to get this work done now, despite being so tired. There was no way
he was going to get himself killed because he didn’t know the facts. He’d seen
things go wrong before, and he didn’t want to emulate his best friend. Remus
growled one more. His thoughts were running away with him again.
He awoke some time later. The
fire, enchanted to stay lit, roared merrily beside him, keeping his right side
hot, almost to the point of scorching. His left side was somewhat colder. There
was pale light coming through the closed curtains, and Remus surmised that it
was early morning. Groaning, he lifted his head. Several papers stuck to the
side of his cheek. He pulled them off, sure that there would be ink marks left
on his skin.
Shaking his head at his
stupidity – it had been years since he’d fallen asleep on top of notes – Remus
made his way upstairs to the bathroom. Looking in the mirror, he could see that
he was right. There, on his left cheek, were the words “in the ear”. A thought
flitted through his mind, hearing the comments of James and Sirius the last
time he’d awoken with writing on his face. Memories of his time at Hogwarts
were resurfacing more and more, and Remus was having a harder time banishing
them. Instead, he threw himself into his work. At least then his mind was
occupied.
Remus expected the mirror to
comment on this, until he remembered that it was a Muggle mirror, and he lived
in a Muggle house. He still wasn’t used to living in the Muggle world. Getting
to and from places was exceedingly difficult. He had placed Apparition wards
around his house, so Apparating was out of the question. And his fireplace
wasn’t connected to the Floo Network for security reasons. Portkeying had
become hea heavily regulated, and that meant that Remus had had to resort to
the Muggle way of getting about.
He had considered buying a car,
but it had been years since he’d driven – he’d learnt during his self-imposed
exile from the Wizarding World after Sirius’ sentence – and he wasn’t sure
whether he wanted to endanger people every time he had to go to work. His
dilemma had been solved when Dumbledore had given him a present. Sirius’ bike.
It was the only thing, apart from his wand, that Remus possessed that was
magical, although Remus didn’t dare fly it. Sirius was the only one who could
actually get it to fly reliably every time he took to the air. How Hagrid had
managed it fifteen years ago, Remus didn’t know. It was also the only thing
that Sirius had left behind, aside from 12 Grimmauld Place.
Remus grimaced. Grimmauld Place.
He had been asked to live there, but had declined. There was no way he was
going to live there on his own. Sure, the Order met there and, for
part of the summer, Harry lived there too, but for the majority of the time,
Remus would have been the only one. It wasn’t until later that Tonks had
decided to move in there, and by that time Remus had already bought his Muggle
house. Still, with both himself and Tonks on Order duty, they would not have
been likely to be in the house at the same time. He knew he couldn’t have
handled living in the place that made Sirius who he had been when Remus had
first met him. Being surrounded by images that reminded him of Sirius was a
nightmare for Remus. How Sirius survived living in that house Remus did not
know.
Facing demons, however, was
something Remus was extremely adept at. After all, he had to face his every
month. So, once again, he would steel himself to enter Sirius’ childhood home
and report to the Order his findings, such as they were. Sighing, Remus ran his
hands over his face. He noticed that they bore more scars than they used to,
his face was more gaunt, and his hair greyer than ever. “That’s what you get
for going on a mission with that slimy git, Snape,” his inner voice said.
Remus rolled his eyes. “All
right, Sirius, will you please stop talking to me in my head!” Then he threw
his arms up in the air. “I’ve completely lost it, I really have.” Ano inn inner
voice, which sounded much more like his own, said, “That’s what not getting
enough sleep gets you. Now go to bed.” For once, Remus didn’t argue. He would
need all the sleep he could get to face the Order later that day.o:p>
~*~*~*~*~
The meeting was over. Tonks had disappeared to rest – she
looked as bad as he felt. Molly was cooking lunch whilst the Weasley children
and Harry did more spring-cleaning.
After being shooed out the
kitchen, Remus searched the house for the teenagers. Drawn to the living room
by the sound of laughter, he watched through the doorway as Ginny and Harry
pelted Ron with cushions. Ron was retaliating furiously and eventually cornered
Ginny. Harry attempted to rescue her by pounding his cushion on Ron’s head.
Just then, Harry’s cushion burst and feathers flew everywhere.
Remus grinned. The look on their faces was priceless. It
reminded him of when James, Lily, and Sirius had had a pillow fight in their
seventh year. By the time they had finished, the entire common room had been
covered in feathers. Remus sobered immediately, and was only drawn out of his
reverie by Harry touching his arm.
“All you all right, Remus?” the
boy asked, the twinkle in his green eyes fading.
Remus pulled himself together
and smiled. “Yes. Just reminiscing. I don’t suppose this,” he waved his hand to
take in the feather-covered settee and floor, “was part of Molly’s
spring-cleaning plans?”
Ron grinned ruefully and
shrugged. Ginny smiled softly, her deep brown eyes sorrowful. Remus had noticed
that Ginny’s eyes were always like that when she looked at him.
“Well, I suppose I’d better help
you tidy up,” Remus said, smiling. He got out his wand, and helped, despite the
protests from the teenagers. “Look,” he said, “I have nothing better to do.
Besides, I haven’t seen you all summer.”
They gave in eventually, and the
four of them worked hard until lunch was ready. Molly came into the living room
to find it sparkling, the cushion repaired, and no trace of feathers anywhere.
Ginny went off to wake up Tonks for lunch, and Remus, Harry, and Ron followed
Molly back into the kitchen.
“How’s Buckbeak?” Remus asked,
his mouth filled with bacon and eggs.
Harry grimaced. “Not too good.”
He pulled up a sleeve to show a thin scar on his forearm. “He’s still not
recovered. I don’t know what else to do.”
“Hagrid’s no help,” Ron added.
“Every time he goes near Buckbeak, he bursts into tears.”
“He’s happier when Tonks goes to
visit him,” Ginny said, “but of course, she can’t be there all the time.”
Tonks smiled tiredly. “Remus,
perhaps you could…”
Remus held his hand up. “No,
Tonks. I know what you’re going to ask me, and the answer is still no. I’m not
living here. I’m perfectly happy where I am.”an>
“Are you?” his werewolf hearing
picked up Tonks’ mutter, but he didn’t react.
“Have you seen Hermione
recently?” Remus asked, changing the subject.
Harry shook his head, and Ron
looked depressed. “Only once, but that was a while ago. She’s keeping to
herself.”
“She’s probably still grieving,”
Ginny pointed out.
“Have you seen her?” Harry
asked, knowing that Remus lived close to Hermione.
Remus nodded. “I saw her last
week. I had dinner with her and her aunt Linda. Who’s appetite is amazing. She’s reached
the stage in her pregnancy where she’s craving all sorts of weird combinations.
It was Marmite and chips last week.”
Everyone at the table bar Molly
grimaced. “I craved charcoal when I was pregnant with Ron,” Molly said, a smile
on her face.
Ron looked sick. “Charcoal?”
Ginny grinned. “Maybe that’s why
you are the way you are,” she teased, ducking as Ron feigned hitting her.
Remus added, “Lily didn’t have
any cravings. It was almost like she wasn’t pregnant at all. Although James did
say she had mood swings. Sirius and I were forever getting calls for rescue
missions.”
The table went silent for a
moment, and then Ron asked, “So, how was she?”
Remus frowned, and then realised
he was talking about Hermione. “She’s fine. Although throwing herself into her
work. I’ve been tutoring her in Advanced Defence Against the Dark Arts, at her
insistence.”
“Why on earth would she want
tutoring during the summer?” Ron asked, incredulous, forgetting that Hermione
usually studied during the summer.
“Because she’s trying to keep
her mind occupied,” Harry, Tonks, and Remus answered in unison.
Ron’s face became understanding.
“Oh, right, of course.”
The rest of lunch was eaten in
relative silence, and afterwards Remus, having offered to wash the dishes and
having been declined, went up to see Buckbeak. The Hippogriff was indeed
looking the worse for wear, although he did look considerably better than last
year – Remus was sure that the presence of Harry and Tonks had encouraged the
Hippogriff to continue living.
Remus spent the rest of the day
with the creature. Before, he hadn’t even thought about the Hippogriff, and now
he felt guilty. It hadn’t occurred to him that Buckbeak was going to be
affected by the absence of Sirius.
“You were being really
close-minded, Remus,” his inner Sirius said. “You thought my death affected
only you. Look at Harry, he’s lost his parents, and then his godfather. You’re
the only one left to keep an eye on him.”
“Harry’s got Ron and Hermione,
and the rest of the Weasleys,” Remus retorted.
“What about Tonks? She’s only a
young Auror, and you know she loved me. Us rebellious Blacks had to stick
together.”
Remus smiled slightly. “But
still, first James and Lily, and then you, and then Peter, and then you again.
Sirius, I can’t think about anyone else any more. I can’t lose anyone else.”
“Now you’re sounding like me,”
the Sirius-voice said. Remus could hear the amusement in the voice and could
picture the smirk on Sirius’ face. “Remus, there are people down there that
need you, whether you like it or not. And the more you distance yourself, the
harder things will get for them,” the voice went on more seriously. “And
besides, I would hope you’re out for revenge.”
Remus shook his head. “No
revenge. What’s the point? Besides, if people need me, and I go looking for
revenge, what happens to them when I die?”
The Sirius-voice snorted.
“Remus, if you don’t get revenge, you know Harry will try, and then he’ll
die. Besides, James, Lily, and I are counting on you. And you can’t lie to
yourself. Which by extension means you can’t lie to me, since I’m only a voice
in your head. And that means that I know you’re seeking revenge, even if you
won’t admit to anyone but yourself. Why else are you working so hard?
Yes, it’s partly to banish the dreams, but that’s not all of it, is it?”
“When did you get so logical?”
Remus asked gloomily. He knew the voice was right. “All right,” he said loudly,
disturbing Buckbeak, who had been dozing. “I’ll keep an eye on Harry, and make
sure that when he does go off for revenge, he takes me with him. Merlin, I’m
turning into Sirius! It must be the motorbike.”
Remus stood up and looked at
Buckbeak. The Hippogriff looked more relaxed and happy than Remus had seen him
in the last year. “I promise I’ll visit more, Bucky,” he whispered softly
before he left.
~*~*~*~*~
Later that week, his mission was
finished. He reported the results, such as they were, to Dumbledore, and was
now free, for the time being. Deciding to visit Linda and Hermione, Remus
bought a bottle of wine from the local corner shop, and rode the motorcycle
over their house.
Thinking back to the
conversation that he had had with Harry, Ron, and Ginny in Grimmauld Place had
made him pick up the phone, a Muggle device he was becoming adept at using, and
called Hermione’s aunt, suggesting a return to their usual dinners. Linda had
become a true friend, despite the fact that she didn’t know his true nature,
and her enthusiastic curiosity about magic kept his mind off other, more depressing,
subjects. Also, Remus thought that Hermione might want more tutoring in Defence
Against the Dark Arts.
Linda opened the door and smiled
broadly. Remus smiled back, taking in her glowing face, and round belly.
Pregnancy certainly suited her, although, since he hadn’t met her when she
hadn’t been pregnant, he really had nothing to compare her appearance with. “Come in, come in, Remus. It’s good to see you.”
She took the bottle of wine from him with a smile, and led him into the
kitchen.
His werewolf nose was already
twitching, but he waited until the smell became very apparent to him before
saying, “Linda, what’s that smell?”
Linda’s eyes widened. “Oh blast,
I forgot, I left the mince on.” She dashed the rest of the way into the
kitchen, which was beginning to fill with smoke. Once she reached the stove,
she turned it off, and shoved the pan containing the meat off the hob.
Remus opened a window to let the
smoke dissipate. A coughing from the kitchen door alerted him to Hermione’s
presence. “Have you been burning things again, Linda?” she asked, smiling.
Linda shrugged. “What can I say?
I just don’t have a knack in the kitchen.”
Remus moved to stand by the
stove and peered into the pan. “What were you making?”
“It was meant to be lasagne,” Linda
said mournfully.
Remus smiled. “Have you got any
mince left? I think I can revive some of this.”
Linda nodded, and Hermione
fetched the mince out of the fridge. “Remus, you’re a star for doing this,”
Linda said, handing him a large dish.
Remus shrugged. “I don’t mind, I
actually like cooking. Besides, if I don’t, we’ll have to order take-out again,
and I think that the Chinese has begun to think we’re starting our own takeaway
and checking out the competition, we order there so much.”
Once Remus was in charge, the
meal went according to plan, and the result was delicious. The three of them
talked about magic and various other topics, until Hermione’s yawns were nearly
splitting her face in two. She grinned at the looks Linda and Remus were giving
her. “I think I may give up and go to bed. Good night.” She gave her aunt and
Remus hugs and left the room.
Remus waited until he could no
longer hear her footsteps and then turned to Linda. “So, how is she doing?”
Linda smiled. “She’s doing
really well, actually.”
Remus returned the smile.
“Throwing herself into her studies is working, then.”
“And I think that our guess
about what she’s actually doing is right,” Linda added. “I just wish that she
would tell me what she was doing, that way I could help her.”
Remus smiled comfortingly. “I’m sure that there is a very
good reason Hermione isn’t telling you, and when she is able to, she will do.”
Then he grinned mischievously. “And when she does, I want to be the first to
know.”
Linda’s eyes twinkled merrily.
“You bet. So, anyway, tell me about Hogwarts, and what it’s like to grow up
knowing you’re a wizard.”
Remus sobered slightly. He
wasn’t entirely sure that Linda was ready to hear about his life. She had found
out that he was a werewolf only the week before, due to him having to explain a
comment that she had overheard Hermione say to him. Still, he was tired of
being on his own, and maybe it was time to talk to someone who wasn’t directly
affected by the people that made up such a large part of his life.
Once he had started to talk
about growing up, being bitten, and how that had affected him, his joy and
apprehension at going to Hogwarts, meeting the people who were to become his
best friends, Remus found that he couldn’t stop. When he got the part about
Sirius dying, he very nearly broke down, and it was only Linda’s soft
reassuring him that nothing had been his fault that had stopped him.
Of course, she didn’t know that
Peter’s death had been his fault. Logically, he told himself over and over
again that the deaths of James and Lily, and then Sirius were not his fault.
After all, he couldn’t help having been bitten by a werewolf when he was nine.
But some part of him still insisted that if he hadn’t gone into the forest to
pick wildflowers for his mother, none of it would have happened. He wouldn’t
have become a werewolf, and so he would have been trusted enough to be
considered to be the Secret Keeper instead of Peter. Then James and Lily would
still be alive and Sirius wouldn’t have gone to Azkaban, and wouldn’t have died
two years ago protecting Harry, because Harry wouldn’t have been the
Boy-Who-Lived.
Linda seemed to realise where
his train of thought was going and drew him out of it, managing to convince him
that there was nothing to be done to change the past, and that he had to hold
on to the pleasant memories he had to live in the present. Finally, Remus
smiled slightly. He knew that Hermione had overheard most of the conversation
from the stairs – his werewolf smell had caught her scent almost immediately,
but he didn’t begrudge her eavesdropping. After all, he had done quite a bit of
that in his life.
After that night, Remus did his
best to cheer up slightly, and he and Hermione grew closer, possibly as a
result of her overhearing his conversation with her aunt. He tried to stay
cheerful all through his three-week mission with Snape, undercover amongst the
lower-ranking Death Eaters, however, it had been extremely difficult,
especially since all that they had found out was that there was a leak, but
they still had no idea who it was.
Remus returned to tutoring
Hermione happily, as it kept his thoughts away from what was happening outside
the house. All too soon, though, she no longer needed his tuition, and
Dumbledore had another mission for him. This one involved him in a stakeout
situation for two weeks, something he was not looking forward to.
Remus left Linda and Hermione’s
house for the last time that summer feeling a sense of loss. He had enjoyed the
time he had spent at the house, and knew that once term started again, things
would never be the same again. He and Linda had concluded that Hermione was
studying so hard because she was taking more than one set of exams over the
summer, and since his assistance was no longer required, it did not take a
genius to work out that her exams were coming up. He wished her luck the only
way he knew how, without giving away the fact that he had guessed. He gave her
a huge hug, and a quick peck on the cheek, saying, “It’ll be all right,
Hermione, don’t you worry.”
Hermione seemed to think that he
was talking about her returning to Hogwarts for her final year, as he had
wanted her to, and smiled. “I know. Take care of yourself, Remus.”
“I’ll do my best.” He left then,
and returned to his own house. It always seemed quite cold after he had visited
Linda and Hermione, despite his attempts at making it his own. However, since
he was only there half the time, anyway, normally it didn’t make much
difference.
After packing for his mission,
Remus fell into bed. He was tired, but wasn’t looking forward to going to
sleep. It had recently been a full moon and, despite the Wolfsbane potion that
Snape was still supplying him with, it had not been an easy transformation. The
physical process was no different than normal, however, it brought home to him
how much he missed Sirius. When his fellow Marauder had been in Azkaban, it
hadn’t been so hard, as he had believed that that was where he belonged, having
betrayed all those that trusted him.
The hole in Remus’ heart was made even larger with the
knowledge that Sirius had been innocent all along, had somehow stayed sane
whilst in Azkaban, and, after escaping, had done everything in his power to
keep Harry safe, to the point of recklessness, as was his wont. For a short
while, he had had Sirius back, being there when
he was transformed, like he had been all those years ago. Now, it sometimes
felt as though he was working on automatic pilot, or as though someone had put
the Imperius Curse on him. Remus shuddered, and tried not to think about that
particular Unforgivable.
Tomorrow, he would be leaving
for the Peak District, to observe Augustus Rookwood who, it was rumoured, was
attempting to infiltrate the Ministry again, using his contacts. He had a
holiday home in the Peak District and was going to be spending the next two
weeks there. Thanks to Tonks, they knew exactly where his house was, and the
Order had secured a small cottage in a nearby wood for Remus to stay in whilst
he was watching Rookwood.
With thoughts of how he was
going to survive the next two weeks alone in a strange place, spying on a known
Death Eater, Remus finally fell asleep, and had very uncomfortable dreams. The
next morning he awoke early, although not considerably refreshed.
He travelled by motorbike most
of the way, and met up with Tonks at an arranged point. She took possession of
Sirius’ bike (in Remus’ mind, it would always be Padfoot’s, not his) and
exchanged it for a beaten up old car in which
Remus would drive the rest of the way. The motorbike was too conspicuous.
When Remus saw the cottage he
was meant to be living in, he couldn’t believe his eyes. It appeared as though
it only had half a roof, and three windows were missing. Fortunately, Rookwood
had not arrived at his house yet, which meant that Remus could discretely
repair the cottage without any magic detectors being alerted.
The next two weeks were hell,
even more so than Remus had first suspected. The cottage, despite his repairs,
was cold and damp, and the late August nights chilled him to the bone. On top
of that, he couldn’t go to the shop on a regular basis, so he was subsisting on
a meagre amount of food. His stomach had stopped growling after the fourth day,
and thereafter was filled with a constant ache.
There were no facilities for a
shower in the cottage. In fact, Remus had stopped calling it a cottage, and
referred to it as a shack, for that was all it was, really. In earlier times,
he supposed that it was used as a summerhouse for the occupants of Rookwood’s
rather opulent house, but it had been forgotten about and the seasons had not
been kind to it.
By the time Rookwood had
returned to his town house, Remus was decidedly the worse for wear. He had not
been getting a huge amount of sleep, mainly because he didn’t want to dream,
but also because Rookwood’s activities took place at various times of the day
and night.
He returned to his house
thankfully. Tonks had told him that there was an Order meeting to be held the
next night and had given him a file to read. It had informed of Hermione’s
involvement, and of the prophecy concerning her. Frankly, Remus wasn’t that
surprised. He’d known that there was something special about the girl for quite
some time.
mso-bidi-font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Century'>The next day, Remus dozed, and
finally remembered, at the last minute that he had to be at Grimmauld Place.
Remus grimaced. This work was definitely getting to him. He was always punctual
if it was humanely possible. Taking a quick shower in an attempt to wash away
his worries, Remus ignored the Sirius-voice that was telling him that it wasn’t
the job that was getting to him, it was his wracking guilt.
“Have faith in yourself, Remus,”
it told him.
Remus merely growled, grabbed
his keys, jumped on the bike and sped over to Grimmauld Place. He was in no
mood to listen to the Sirius in his head at the moment.
When Remus arrived, Arthur,
Molly, Bill, and Snape were already assembled. His werewolf hearing picked up
Albus saying, “We are just waiting on – ” before he opened the door. “Ah,
R, he, here you are.”
“Sorry I’m late, Albus,” Remus
apologised, sitting down next to Snape. He noticed the Potions Master glancing
concernedly at him, and offered him a weak smile in return. He knew he looked
bad, but he must look terrible if Snape was concerned about him. Remus banished
that thought as one of those that belonged to the Sirius part of him. He knew
what Snape had sacrificed for the Order and what he had done, and thus knew
that Snape was considerably more caring than he liked people to think. Still,
he did remember the face that had stared back at him in the mirror earlier that
day, and he hadn’t liked the look of it. Remus thought that he looked as though
he was about to collapse at any moment, and, truth be told, he felt like it
too.
Snape, on the other hand, looked
his usual sour self, perhaps slightly more so now that Hermione was a Professor
at Hogwarts. Remus smiled to himself. Snape would no doubt hate having to work
alongside the girl, correction, young woman, that had plagued his classroom for
years. Still, at least it wasn’t Harry.
Albus was not going to beat
around the bush today, it seemed. “We seem to have another leak.”
Remus observed the reactions of
the people around the table. Everyone bar himself and Snape, who had been the
ones to inform Dumbledore of the fact, looked shocked. They had all thought
that after Vector’s dismissal, the leak had been plugged.
Arthur Weasley frowned. “Are you
sure, Albus?”
Snape answered. “Quite,” he
said, as Albus glanced at him.
“I’m afraid so, Arthur,” Remus
added, sighing, and staring tiredly at the table. Just thinking about all this
made his head ache.
Bill asked the next obvious
question. “Do we have any idea who?”
“No.” Snape was, as usual, short
and straight to the point.
"I'm afraid we have
nothing," Albus added with a sigh. "Voldemort is closing in, and our
only hope is that he does not discover the only weapon we have before it is
ready."
Severus raised his eyebrows.
"You had better hope Professor Granger does not discover this either. And
I highly doubt she would appreciate being thought of as a weapon, let alone our
last hope."
Remus felt inclined to agree
with him. Hermione was extremely intelligent, but she was still a Gryffindor,
and one that hunoundound with Harry Potter. If she found out, she was likely to
lose her temper, and Hermione without her temper was something that Remus did
not want to see. All he said, though, was, “Indeed.”
The meeting went on, and Remus
informed them that his mission this time had been a success. Rookwood was
indeed trying to infiltrate the Ministry, however, his attempts had failed.
This, at least, was good news.
Eventually, the meeting broke
up, and Remus made his way upstairs to see Hermione and Harry. He found them in
Harry’s bedroom, Hermione fast asleep with her head on Harry’s chest.
Remus smiled and entered
quietly. He walked to the edge of the bed, and woke Harry up gently. When he
saw him, he frowned. “You look terrible,” he informed him.
“Thanks, nice to see you too,”
Remus replied, chuckling.
Harry laughed quietly, but the
movement caused Hermione to wake up. She growled at him, and he kissed the top
of her head. “Sorry, Mia,” Harry said, yawning, “but you have a visitor.”
Hermione turned around and saw
Remus, who had moved into the room and was now crouching by the bed. She
smiled, and then, after looking him over, frowned. “Remus, you look awful.”
Remus chuckled again, and Harry
mumbled, “That’s what I said.”
Remus smiled. “And to think I
was about to tell you that you looked marvellous. Bed hair aside, of course,”
he added, winking.
Hermione sat up, leaving Harry
to work the crick out of his neck. “Thank you,” she said. “But really, Remus,
what’s wrong?”
There was no way that Remus was
going to tell Hermione anything. She had enough on her plate, and there was
nothing that she could do to help him, anyway. “There’s nothing wrong.”
Hermione just looked at him for
a moment, and then threw her arms around him, hugging him tightly. He returned
the hug, having missed Hermione’s gentleness and willingness to dish out hugs
to everyone andone.one. He thought of her hugging Snape and the resulting
reaction and chuckled, pulling back to sit on the bed. Hermione and Harry made
room for him, and Hermione smiled her warm smile at him, but Remus could see
the worry behind her eyes. Remus sighed inwardly. He really didn’t want her to
be concerned about him.
“It’s not as bad as all that,”
he told her, smiling. “I’m a little tired, and I think I may be coming down
with the werewolf flu. It’ll pass,” he added, remembering Sirius coming up with
that as an excuse for missing Potions once.
Harry raised his eyebrows and
smiled, unconsciously emulating the look that James had given Sirius over that
comment. “The werewolf flu?” he asked.
Hermione sniggered, and soon all
three of them were laughing. Remus was glad to be laughing once again, and
watching Hermione hit Harry’s arm made him grin. Then she turned to Remus,
looking serious. “Remus,” she said, “I want you to promise me you’ll get some
rest.”
“Yes, mother,” Remus replied, unable
to shake the memory of Lily saying the exact same thing twenty years before.
Harry chuckled, but he, too,
looked serious. “You know she’s right, Remus.”
Remus groaned inwardly. What had
he done to deserve having two teenagers wanting to mollycoddle him? “Maybe the
fact that you look like you’re about to pass out has something to do with it?”
the Sirius-voice suggested. Remus mentally rolled his eyes, and answered Harry.
“Isn’t she always? She is, after all, the youngest Hogwarts Professor in history,
you know.”
This comment prompted Hermione
to say, “Oh, Remus, I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you.”
Remus smiled. “It’s all right,
Hermione,” he told her. “Linda and I had it pretty much worked out after the
first two weeks of the summer. When you finally told her, she decided she
should tell her partner in crime.”
“What?” Hermione asked, her eyes
wide.
Remus laughed. “You may have
been able to fool this sod,” he said, indicating Harry, “but I’d like to think
I’m rather more intelligent and – ouch!” Harry had hit him.
Harry smiled warmly. “You may
look like hell, but that doesn’t mean I’ll let you insult me.”
Hermione rolled her eyes. “Men.”
Remus was about to protest when
there was a knock at the door. Hermione called out, “Come in.”
The door opened, and Snape
entered the room. At least, he put his foot over the threshold. Remus didn’t
think Snape wanted to be any further into Harry’s bedroom than that. “If you
are ready, Professor Granger, we will be returning to Hogwarts shortly,” Snape
said curtly.
Hermione nodded, sliding her
legs off the bed. “Thank you, Professor, I’ll be down in a moment.”
Snape nodded and left. Remus’
hearing caught Ginny Weasley asking to speak to Snape privately when she
returned to school, and wondered what that was about. He made a mental note to
ask Snape thxt txt time he saw him. Turning back to the two teenagers in front
of him, Remus heard Harry asking Hermione if she was busy for the rest of the
holidays.
Hermione replied by saying that she had to look over
student records, which prompted Harry to look fearful. Remus chuckled as
Hermione reassured him that she wouldn’t be looking as his. He imagined that
Harry’s work was as exemplary as Sirius. They both had had other things on
their minds whilst they had been at school, although Harry’s was distinctly
more serious.
Harry looked relieved, and said, Remus laughed loudly at that. Harry’s face became torn, as it The pair promised to arrange a Everyone was gathered at the END Part One (Part Two – Harry’s
p>
“You never know. I could be a genius.”
James had used to say that Lily all the time, but it had never worked. He saw
that Harry looked insulted, and Remus quickly explained.
always did when someone mentioned his father, and Hermione hugged him hard,
making him laugh. “I have to go,” she said.
meeting before the term starting, and then it was time to leave. Remus stood up
and offered Hermione a hand. “I’ll walk you downstairs,” he said, pulling her
to her feet.
bottom of the stairs, apart from the conspicuously absent Ron, who, Remus had
gathered, had not taken the news that Hermione was the new Professor at all
well. After goodbyes were said, Hermione and Snape left the house, and Remus
was left to wonder how Hermione was going to cope with the new challenges
before her.
PoV coming soon)
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