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Lost and Found	By : TheLibrarian Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female Views: 3257 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 1
- 2
Lost and
Found

� 2005 by
MMHG aka Gypsy Heart

Summary:
Merlin�s Beard! This is yet another fanfiction
inspired by the snarky and, erm,
sexy, Severus Snape. It
involves, among other things, gloomy dungeons, hidden desires, passionate
embraces and stolen kisses, all placed against an actual plot�

Disclaimer:
Harry Potter and all his friends (and enemies) are the brain-child of J.K.
Rowling. Exclusive ownership belongs to JKR, Arthur A. Levine Books and
Scholastic Inc. Jane Sinclair and all additional characters belong to me. You
belong to yourself.

The only
thing I own at the moment, apart from the clothes on my back and certain
effects necessary to sustain life, is my new laptop, which I�m supposed to use
to type up my thesis � but I won�t tell, if you won�t�

JKR, thank
you for thinking up this gem of a magical world, and please forgive any bad fanfiction written by those who are not worthy (including
me).

Feedback:
Greatly appreciated.

Distribution:
www.Adultfanfiction.net and
Fanfiction.net. If you want to post my story anywhere else, please let me know.

Comments: Set after HBP, so major spoilers ahead!
Originally, this story was intended as a one-shot PWP, but as I was writing I
became inspired. To those people who can�t handle multi-chapter prose � do
yourselves a favor and hit the BACK button now. Unless, of course, you feel
adventurous � in that case, please read on and enjoy!

Rating:
If children are thought a suitable audience for a story where people called
Death Eaters torture and kill the innocent, grisly hooded skeletons try to suck
out your soul, and a crazed psychopathic maniac, who makes Hitler look like a
preschool teacher, is out to dominate the world, they certainly won�t go blind
reading my story � well, at least the first few chapters. Rest assured, once it
gets too wild, appropriate warning lights will flash and parents will be asked
to shield the eyes and ears of their impressionable offspring, who � come to
think of it � shouldn�t be here in the first place. Kids, go and read Tom
Sawyer, or something similarly educational.

Nonetheless,
it�s rated R for now, but this might change down the road.

***

I once was lost but now am found

Amazing Grace, Traditional

Chapter
One � The Return

Jane
Sinclair had been in London for
less than two hours and was already running late. She had managed to make her
way to King�s Cross from the airport after her rental car reservation had
mysteriously disappeared into cyberspace, only to find that in order to change
trains, she actually had to walk a couple of blocks to the other train
terminal. Now there she was, lugging a large suitcase, a carry-on and a purse
up the narrow staircase bumping into people hurrying past her. Out of breath,
Jane reached the top of the stairs and quickly oriented herself before deciding
to simply follow the throng of people walking briskly in one direction. Her
suitcase suddenly tilted to the side, painfully twisting her wrist. Cursing
under her breath, she struggled valiantly to straighten her stubborn valise
without causing a major pile-up on the narrow sidewalk.

She dragged
her unwilling luggage towards the King�s Cross terminal, barely sparing a
glance at the colorful shops and restaurants lining the street. Checking her
watch, Jane realized that she was cutting it rather close and she picked up her
pace. Once inside King�s Cross, she felt momentarily lost. She looked around,
trying to figure out where to go. Things certainly had changed since the last
time she�d been here. People of all shapes and sizes were pushing past her,
each apparently knowing where they were going. Her gaze fell upon the
electronic board announcing all the upcoming trains. For a moment she scanned
it, searching for her train until she caught herself. With a little smile Jane
gave a slight shake of her head. Of course the Hogwarts Express wouldn�t be
announced so blatantly. It never had been. She sought shelter behind an
information booth and pulled out the document she had carried with her across
two continents and an ocean. Jane unfolded the worn yellow parchment and wiped
over the creases. She knew the content by heart, of course, yet she quickly
scanned it again.

Dear Miss
Sinclair,

I am happy to inform you that you
have been selected to join the teaching staff at Hogwarts
School of Witchcraft
and Wizardry as Professor of Muggle Studies. Given
the unfortunate events of late and the reorganization of the Ministry of Magic,
it has been unanimously agreed upon to remedy the regrettable decision that
resulted in your banishment from the Wizarding world
thirteen years ago. Recent events have called for the revision of certain laws,
and the Ministry has assured me that upon your arrival, you shall be awarded
with full amnesty regarding your past.

Before his untimely demise,
Professor Dumbledore had selected you specifically with the intent to offer you
this position. As the newly appointed headmistress of Hogwarts, it pleases me
to extend this offer to you now. Your considerable experiences in the Muggle world would be an invaluable addition to our
curriculum. Furthermore, it was Professor Dumbledore�s opinion that considering
recent events involving He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, educating our students in the
Muggle way of life is of vital importance if we want
to save both our worlds. Allowances will be made for the fact that you were
never given the opportunity to complete your education here at Hogwarts. Should
you accept this position, we will provide you with the extra instruction you
require to fully re-enter our world.

The Hogwarts Express leaves King�s
Cross, as always, from Platform 9 � at 11
AM on September 1^st.

Sincerely,

Minerva McGonagall, Headmistress

PS: My dear Miss Sinclair, I am
sure this letter comes as a surprise, if not as a shock, to you. It took us a
while to discover your whereabouts, especially since you changed your name
following the whole debacle so many years ago. I remember you well, and I
always thought it a shame that your outstanding academic achievements,
excellent school records and unblemished character were not enough to vouch for
you and sway the Wizengamot. I am delighted to offer
you this position, and hope with all my heart that you will be able to overlook
the past. To be frank, you are needed here, for reasons I cannot divulge
just yet. You should know that there was another reason you were chosen by
Professor Dumbledore, which I shall reveal to you in person, should you accept
the post. If it is your wish to forgive us our trespasses against you, we would
gladly welcome you in our midst once more.

MM

Jane sighed,
tugging the letter back into her pocket. Yes, thirteen years were an
awfully long time, especially when you were on your own. Many things could
happen in thirteen years, but the past could never be erased; nor the
bitterness or the loneliness. Blinking away the unbidden tears that suddenly
had welled up, she looked up to scan the direction signs. Northbound trains
left from platforms nine and ten. Well, she thought, that�s a start. She
grabbed hold of her suitcase and fought her way through the crowd. Eventually,
she reached the wall dividing platforms nine and ten. Her hand stroked the
rough brick wall beneath the Platform Nine sign. Thirteen years ago, the
portal had been sealed, denying her access to the world she had been born into.
She pressed her hand gently against the wall and felt it give way. Even though
she had expected it, it startled her. Up until now, she had been plagued with
doubts, wondering whether someone wasn�t having a terrible joke at her cost,
forcing her to spend her savings to travel to England.
But, no, it was all real. She had been forgiven. She was finally going home.

Mindful of
the people hurrying past her, she huddled against the wall, closed her eyes and
quickly let herself be swallowed up. Jane never had understood why magical folk
kept running into it � especially since the danger of discovery was so much
greater that way. The sound of a whistle blowing and steam being forcefully
released told her where she was even before she opened her eyes. The Hogwarts
Express stood before her in all its colorful magnificence. Happiness surged
through her and her heart skipped a beat at the wonderful sight. For years she
had dreamed about coming back, but no dream or memory had prepared her for the
vivid reality. She took in the scene before her. Children were being seen off
by their parents. Some were exchanging hugs, others handshakes. First-years
clung to their mothers, not wanting to leave the safety of the arms around
them, while older pupils were pretending indifference. Trunks and animals are
being loaded into the train. All in all, the hustle and bustle presented a
whimsical picture � had it not been for the number of cloaked men and women
lurking behind luggage carts and in dark corners all along the platform. Aurors! Her mind recognized them from a
distant memory. Jane briefly wondered what they all were doing here. It
probably had something to do with the events Professor McGonagall referred to
in her letter, she concluded, something about He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named.
She frowned, trying to recall what she knew about him, the Dark Lord, but all
she remembered was that he disappeared the night he killed the Potters sixteen
years ago. Could he have come back?

The train
whistle interrupted her ponderings. She checked the giant station clock and
realized that it was time. She joined the remaining few students as they
scrambled to board the train. As soon as the door slammed shut behind her, the
train jerked into motion. Thanking her lucky stars that she managed not to
leave any of her luggage behind in the rush, Jane slowly made her way along the
cart looking for a child-free compartment. Most of the compartments were already
filled with squealing pupils, while the occupants in others were in an
unnaturally somber mood. Puzzled, she pushed on, while mentally compiling a
list of questions she intended to ask the Headmistress. One other thing she
noticed was that the number of students seemed to have considerably decreased
since her years at Hogwarts.

She finally
reached a compartment occupied by a lone adult passenger. Tired and unable to
go any further, she breathed a sigh of relief and slid the door open. The man
seemed to be asleep and she tried to be as quiet as possible, but to no avail.
Her bags clattered noisily against the door as she entered and the man stirred
slightly. Jane bit her lip, hoping she hadn�t woken him, and quickly deposited
her purse and carry-on on a nearby seat. She contemplated her suitcase with
some misgivings, knowing that somehow she�d have to get it up onto luggage
rack. She rubbed her already sore arms in a feeble attempt to rally any
remaining strength. Taking a deep breath, she grabbed her suitcase and moved to
heave it up. Unfortunately, just then thirty-six hours of sleep deprivation
began to kick in and her arms gave out. She tried a second time, and a third,
when the suitcase suddenly became weightless and floated neatly onto the rack. Moments
later her carry-on settled gently down beside it.

Jane swirled
around and found herself face-to-face with the man who�d been resting by the
window. She presented him with a smile, which � although not brilliant � she
hoped expressed her gratitude and relief.

�Thank you,�
she said heartily, pushing away her tiredness. �I�ve been traveling for over
twenty-four hours, and��

He tugged
away his wand and returned her smile. �No need to apologize,� he returned
casually. �Glad I could help.�

He indicated
the seat across his and they both settled in. Sitting opposite each other, she
had the chance to inspect her fellow traveler more closely. He was older than
her, about ten to fifteen years, but still youthful despite the gray streaking
through his brown hair. The lines on his scarred face spoke of a hard life and
his eyes hinted of the countless things he�d seen � many of them unpleasant.

She pointed
at his coat which was balled-up against the headrest. �I�m sorry if I woke
you.�

He just waved
her off. �Don�t worry. I can always rest when I get to Hogwarts.�

This perked
her up. �You are a professor there?�

�I am
returning as Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. My name is Remus Lupin, by the way.�

She shook
his proffered hand. �How do you do? I am Jane Sinclair.� The name she had given
herself thirteen years ago rolled smoothly over her tongue. Her real name was
nothing but a distant memory, a secret, reminding her of her past life, of the
person she once was. However, she would never be that person again. Too much
had happened since then, too much that could never be rescinded.

�You will
also be teaching?�

�Yes. Muggle Studies.�

Lupin surprised her with his reaction. His eyebrows shot up
and he straightened slightly. �You�� he choked out incredulously. �You are the
new Muggle Studies teacher?�

She frowned.
Somehow she felt that she should have gotten more information from McGonagall
before accepting her offer. �Yes,� she answered slowly. �Why?�

Lupin was still struggling to compose himself. �Oh, I just
expected� um, well�� He was taking great pains to avoid her questioning eyes
and his gaze fell upon her suitcase. �I should have realized�� he mumbled. �You
didn�t use magic to lift your suitcase onto the luggage rack.�

She couldn�t
help but take offense. Inexplicably, she had hoped that upon her return to the Wizarding world, the identity she had cultured for the last
thirteen years would allow her the luxury of anonymity and a chance for a new
beginning. She should have known better. One could never leave the past behind
� no matter how hard one tried. Her pride kicked in and her chin came up.

�I see my
reputation precedes me,� she said wryly.

Lupin�s expression softened. �Please don�t be offended. And
you needn�t worry. Not many people know of you and who you are. Only a select
few were informed of your, er, past.�

She looked
more closely at the man sitting across from her. He sounded sincere enough.
�I�see. And you are one of those select few?�

He nodded.
He didn�t seem very happy about it, though. �I am.�

She settled
back into her seat keeping her gaze steadily on him. �Maybe you can answer some
questions for me, then?�

Concern
spread over his features. He shifted uneasily in his seat. �I�d rather not tell
you anything until we get to Hogwarts and you have had a chance to meet Minerva
and the others. It�s not that I don�t want to help you. You must have many
questions, considering that you were completely cut off from our world for many
years��

�Thirteen,�
she supplied helpfully, a flash of satisfaction surging through her as she
watched him cringe. Almost immediately, however, she regretted her
spitefulness. This man had shown nothing but kindness towards her ever since
they�d met. He had nothing to do with her past, so why was she punishing him?

�Thirteen,
yes.� He cleared his throat. �From what I understand of your circumstances, I
can only imagine the hardships you must have encountered after your, um��

�It�s all
right. You can say it,� she encouraged him. �After my banishment.�

�Yes, well��

She
shrugged. �It�s the truth.�

Lupin stared at her, incredulous. �You are not bitter?�

�About what
I did? No. About what happened afterwards? Yes. I lost everything. And
no amnesty can ever bring it back.�

�I�m sorry.�
Again, Lupin sounded sincere.

�It wasn�t
your fault,� she assured him. �I have learned to live with it. Some days it�s
just harder than others.�

He nodded,
as though he understood. As though he himself knew what it was like to be
ostracized. She suddenly realized that she liked this man. He was a potential
friend. Suddenly the compartment door was pulled open and a pretty young witch
with bubblegum-pink hair squeezed inside.

�Wotcher gorgeous,� she grinned, plopping onto Lupin�s lap. She threw her arms around his neck and kissed
him soundly on the mouth.

Slightly
flushed and rather reluctant, Lupin extracted himself
from the woman�s passionate embrace and clearing his throat, drew her attention
towards Jane.

�Oooh� Sorry,� she giggled insincerely, making no attempt to
remove herself from Lupin�s lap. Instead she wriggled
slightly, snuggling against Lupin.

Jane
grinned. She liked the young woman at once. �I�m sorry,� she said. �I barged in
here without checking whether it would be alright. My only excuse is that I was
tired and simply couldn�t carry my bags any further.�

The young
witch frowned in confusion and threw a questioning glance at Lupin. �Dora,� he said quietly. �This is Jane Sinclair, the
new Muggle Studies teacher.�

Dora�s eyes
grew round as she gave Jane a quick scrutiny, taking in her Muggle
clothes. �Oooooh,� she exhaled knowingly.

Jane smiled
wryly. �I take it you also are one of the select few who know about me.�

Dora slid
off Lupin�s lap and sat beside him. �I�m Nymphadora Tonks, but everybody
calls me Tonks. Weeeell,
everybody but Remus. And only because, well��

Tonks turned beet-red and looked adoringly at the man
sitting beside her.

�Dora is an Auror,� Lupin threw in.

�I see.�
Jane didn�t really, but she suddenly realized that she was too tired for serious
talk and lengthy complicated explanations. For the first time in thirteen
years, she decided to trust a person other than herself and believe Remus Lupin when he said that all
her questions would be answered at Hogwarts.

***

As the
Hogwarts Express pushed its way through the thick autumn fog, Jane settled back
in her seat and fell into a relaxed conversation with Remus
Lupin and Nymphadora Tonks, who quickly opened up once they realized that she
wouldn�t push them any further for answers. Jane was surprised at how easily
she herself came out of her shell and how intently they were listening to one
of her travel anecdotes. She had just reached a particularly thrilling point in
her story, when the compartment door opened and a matronly witch with a refreshment
cart inquired cheerfully whether they were in need of a repast.

Tonks threw her a disgruntled stare. Her annoyance at being
interrupted, however, quickly turned to one of shock.

�Oh no, is
this the time already,� she exclaimed, shooting out of her seat. �I have to
patrol. Don�t finish the story until I get back.�

She planted
a quick kiss on Remus� lips and squeezed out into the
corridor. Jane watched the young Auror disappear
before turning her attention to the man across from her. Remus
had also watched Tonks leave and his love for her was
unmistakable. When he finally looked at her, his eyes were still shining with
unabashed admiration. Jane felt a pang of jealousy squeezing her heart. Not
once in her twenty-nine years had anyone � not even her parents � looked at her
that way. As though she was loved, as though she mattered. She quickly blinked
away the tears that threatened to well up. She had learned early on to hide her
feelings, to build a wall, to wear a mask. To pretend not to feel. With some
effort, Jane grinned at Remus.

�I like
her,� she said sincerely. �She�s refreshingly frank.�

Remus nodded proudly. �That�s my Dora. There isn�t a false
bone in her. She tells it how it is.� He grimaced slightly, thinking back. �She
often puts her foot in her mouth, though.�

�She�s an
original. Not many people dare to be so open. Not many can afford to.�

He nodded
again, in agreement. �Especially nowadays, given�� He caught himself quickly.

�Look,
Professor Lupin,� Jane met his gaze levelly. �I may
be ignorant of what has transpired in recent years, but I am no fool. Nor am I
blind. I�ve seen the Aurors at King�s Cross. Given Tonks� presence, I assume they are also on the train. Now,
the only reason I can think of why a bunch of Aurors
should bother with a train full of students is that they are here for
protection��

Remus opened his mouth to interrupt her, but she raised a
hand to silence him. �Please, let me finish.�

He nodded in
acquiescence.

�I will not
ask you any questions at this point,� Jane continued, purposefully ignoring his
sigh of relief, �but only because I am too tired to think clearly. Besides, I
don�t believe that you know the precise reason I have been asked to
return.�

Lupin cleared his throat. �That is correct, Miss Sinclair��

�Jane,� she
corrected him.

�Jane,� he
nodded. �All I know is that Dumbledore thought you were important.�

�But
Dumbledore is dead now. He didn�t die of natural causes, did he?�

The man
sitting across from her deliberated for a moment before giving his answer. A shadow
crossed his face, warning Jane that what he would tell her would not be pretty.

�Death
Eaters attacked Hogwarts last term. There was a battle�� Remus
broke off, his Adam�s apple jerking convulsively.

Jane gently brought
her hand down on his. �That�s all right. You don�t have to tell me more. I
don�t want you to relive this tragedy.�

He looked at
her gratefully. �I have been in more fights than I care to remember, but this
one was the most gruesome� yet. Many innocents were hurt.�

Jane
squeezed his fingers comfortingly before drawing back. �The memories are always
more painful than the actual event.�

Remus looked at her, surprised at her insight and grateful
for her understanding. But then he recalled her past and knew she spoke from
experience.

�That they
are,� he agreed.

They didn�t
speak for several minutes, each lost in their own thoughts.

�Well,� Jane
finally broke the silence, �all this at least answers one of my questions.�

Remus looked up, questioningly.

�When I was
at Hogwarts, the train was never this empty.�

�Yes,� he
said, �I had hoped it wouldn�t come to it. But after what has happened I can�t
blame any of the parents for being afraid. I believe some will escort their
children personally to the school, but I fear that still many won�t have
allowed their children to return.�

�So, the
Dark Lord has returned. I was wondering about that.� Jane noticed Remus� inquiring glance and explained. �Something Professor
McGonagall mentioned in her letter to me.�

�Your
parents were supporters?�

Jane
wrinkled her nose, thinking back. �They were worse. They were indifferent. We
never talked about anything unpleasant. One simply did not do that. It wasn�t
seemly. Keeping up appearances at any cost. My parents always believed that
actions should be left to those who didn�t have anything better to do or those
who had nothing to lose. That was why my, uh, behavior, had been such a shock
to them. They considered it quite heretical.�

�I�m sorry,�
the man whom she�d known for only a few hours said.

Her eyes met
his and his sympathy was almost her undoing. She slowly shook her head, wiping
the memories of hurt and disappointment from her mind.

�It�s all in
the past,� she told him decidedly.

�That�s the
attitude,� he smiled again. �We have to look to the future, not wallow in the
past.�

�Yes,� Jane
sighed, �which brings us back to why I have been summoned back to Hogwarts
under full amnesty.�

�Yes.�

�Will I be
auditing your class?�

�Pardon me?�

�Professor
McGonagall implied that I could finish my own education at Hogwarts,
considering that I, uh, left school before finishing my sixth year.�

Remus frowned briefly. �I believe you are to receive
private instruction after hours and on weekends.�

�Yes, I
see,� Jane nodded. �It would be difficult for me to assert my authority and
demand respect from my students, if I am taking classes with them.�

�Indeed, it
would be somewhat awkward.�

�Besides, I
have no idea if I can still do magic. I haven�t used it in thirteen
years.� Jane gave a small laugh. �I�d hate to start all over again as a first
year. I couldn�t stand having to repeat six years of Potions with Professor Snape.�

Again, a
shadow passed over Remus� face. He tugged
uncomfortably at his collar and cleared his throat.

�Professor Snape, uh, no longer, erm,
teaches at Hogwarts,� he finally informed her.

His strange
reaction didn�t go unnoticed, but Jane decided to ignore it for now.

�That�s a
relief,� she smiled. �He was terrifying. I suppose I should be grateful to him,
though. My fear of him and his foul temper motivated me into studying. I lived
in constant terror that he would ask me something in class and I wouldn�t know
the answer. I would have never reached N.E.W.T. level without him.�

Remus noticed her smile becoming whimsical, her voice more
wistful. �You know,� Jane continued, �despite my fear of him, my years at
Hogwarts were the happiest in my life. I felt valued here.�

�And you
shall be again,� he assured her. �I am certain of it.�

�That is my
hope. It�s the reason I accepted the post. I no longer care about revenge or
vindication. I just wanted to come back to where I once was happy.�

�I
understand,� Remus told her. �I also spent some of my
happiest times at Hogwarts � among my friends.�

�It would be
nice to have a friend there,� Jane admitted quietly, not quite meeting his
gaze.

�And you
shall,� he informed her firmly, extending his hand. �Let me be the first of
many.�

Jane looked
at the proffered hand and almost burst into tears. Fighting down the tears, she
reverently put her hand in his and shook it, sealing the deal.

�My, my,
my,� a voice from the door startled them. �I leave you two alone for less than
an hour and you�re already conspiring.�

Tonks grinned good-naturedly as she moved to Remus� side once more. His arm automatically sneaked around
her shoulders, drawing her against him.

�Dora,� he
informed her, �Jane and I have decided to become friends. And she likes you,
too.�

Tonks gave a giddy little squeal. �She does?�

Jane
grinned. One couldn�t not like Tonks. She was
exuberant, brimming with life � it was infectious.

�Many people
think I�m too much too take,� Tonks offered. �I�m
lucky Remus is such a patient man.�

�There can
never be too much of a good thing,� Jane assured her. Tonks
squealed again.

�Hear,
hear,� Remus agreed, squeezing her shoulder.

�Will you
tell me the rest of the story now,� Tonks pleaded.

Jane didn�t
have the heart to deny her.

===

A/N:
This marks the end of Chapter One. I hope it peaked your interest and you�ll be
back for Chapter Two.

===
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