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WORD of WISDOM - Not!	By : ZooArmy Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Harry/Draco Views: 2339 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 1-WORD of WISDOM - Not!
- 1
THE CHALLENGE: Sticky!SituationsChallenge by Lady_Diablo

MY TASK: Draco learns a new word and cannot stop saying it. Harry gets annoyed
and learns a new way to get the pureblood to shut up. Hello, busy mouths.

I copied and paste some things from Wikipedia.

Please don�t ask how I know the word, this story is all around. I can�t
remember anymore. I just can say that I know it for quite a while and it makes
me always giggle. And I surprised myself by using it for a HP/DM fic.

I�m sorry, I know this story isn�t good, let alone fulfil the defaults, but it
was my first try at crack!fic
and apparently I suck big time � it�s not crackalicious
at all. *sniff*. I think it really sucks. EW!

THIS IS NOT BETA�D! And I�ll only bother
my beta with it, if you think it�s worthwhile. If you think this sucks, I�ll
simply delete the story.

LADY_DIABLO I�m sorry. I realised I
should have left this challenge to people that are more talented. I hope you�re
not angry or too disappointed. The stories of the other authors are probably
much more to your liking.

��

WORD of WISDOM � Not!

DAY 01

�Oh please, Harry.� Draco whined when they flopped down on the couch. It was a
late Saturday evening and they only had gotten back from dinner in a
restaurant.

Harry grabbed the remote control from the coffee-table, with Draco hanging at
his right arm, and pressed the Power button to bring the telly to life. He
began channel-hopping and tried to ignore the whining and pouting on his right.
The evening had been so nice � until now.

�Harry,� Draco said and pushed out his lower lip. The dark haired young man
made the mistake to look at his lover and regretted it immediately. Huge,
round, shiny, grey eyes looked at him pleadingly, what stressed the pout
tremendously. �I want to see it, muffin.�

Potter groaned and covered his eyes with the arm that wasn�t about to be
absorbed by Draco, through clutching to it tightly.

�But I don�t want to. There�s nothing to catch my interest. I don�t want to see
naked women.�

�It�s a documentary, you could learn something.� Draco tried to persuade his
boyfriend and crawled even closer to him.

�Yeah, about naked woman��

�And men.� Draco piped in. He pressed his lips against the spot under Harry�s
right ear and hummed quietly. �You could learn something about naked men.� He
suggested and felt Harry shudder at the sexy voice he had chosen.

�I think� I think I know enough about men, even the naked ones.�

�Harrrryyyy.� The blond drew out his name in a whiny tone and began
pouting again. Harry had enough. He tossed the remote control in Draco�s lap
and sighed.

�Fine. Fine! Watch your bloody �documentary� about
pornographic films.� He called and wriggled his arm out of Draco�s arms.

The slighter boy squeaked in joy and threw his arms around Harry�s neck to kiss
him fiercely. �Thank you, muffin.� He mumbled against
swollen lips, before he stretched out on the couch and rested his head in
Harry�s lap.

�Yeah, yeah, whatever.� The Gryffindor grumbled, but
needed to admit the kiss made almost up for what would follow now � but only
almost.

Draco switched over to the right channel and the first picture made Harry
wanting to pull the plug. The so-called documentary began with a close-up of
enormous boobs, with the title arranged that it covered the nipples. He had
expected that much from a report about porno film production, but did they need
to scare him from the very first minute?

Those boobs had been monstrous, after all. And he needed to suffer two hours
trough this? Never before had he been so eagerly waiting for advertisement.
Draco sensed his annoyance and patted his knee gently.

�I love you, muffin.�

�Hmmhmm.� Harry mumbled and settled for two boring,
maybe even disgusting hours. He didn�t need to know anything about porn, he could have his own porn behind that door over there
� in their bedroom � with Draco � without a camera or bystander, mind you.

---

Harry had fallen asleep. He had fought against it, no actually not; he had
welcomed it. In the first hour of the documentary he had learned too many
things he didn�t want to know or see and would never forget.

He knew now that� pornography was derived from Greek. �Porne�
for �Whore� and �graphein� for �to write�� They
appeared shortly after the creation of the motion picture in the early 1900s� In
the 1970s pornographic films were semi-legitimized� The industry releases about
11,000 titles on DVD each year.

Well, okay, that may have been interesting facts, but there were also the
disturbing ones, why he had welcomed to fall asleep. So he learned that there
existed something called �Slash � Fiction�; stories about serial- or film
characters and their fictional homosexual love-life, which were surprisingly
mostly produced and watched by females. Strange.

The narrator had also said something about different pornographic sub-genres,
and wow, there seemed to be bulks. The most disgusting and nauseous had been
the illegal ones and Harry wondered how he could have fallen asleep on such
sick things. Bestiality, Child pornography, Hard Crush,
Incest, Rape, Snuff.

He jerked out of his sleep, remembering the last picture he had fallen asleep
to; the set of a shooting, a vast bed, one woman (an ugly one in his opinion)
and two too hairy men and the narrator talking something about
double-penetration.

Draco lay still in his lap and watched the documentary interested and began
snickering suddenly. Harry focused his droopy eyes on the telly and saw a man
giving another a hand-job. They called that �documentary about pornographic
films�? This WAS porn in itself!

�A Fluffer
is a hired member, no matter if male or female, of the crew of a pornographic
movie whose role on the set is to sexually arouse the male participants prior
to the filming of scenes requiring erections, which is mostly achieved through
oral or manual stimulation of the penis.

�Many adult film stars today maintain
that fluffers are a thing of the past, needed in the
'70s and '80s when the crew, shooting on celluloid, needed much more time to
prepare a shot. Erectile dysfunction drugs such as Viagra have also taken part
in replacing fluffers.

Today fluffers aren�t part of porn film productions
anymore, out of cost concerns. In heterosexual films the female part takes
place as fluffer, whereby celebrities of the scene postulate
not to fluff; the supporting actress takes over the fluffing then.

Homosexual actors choose one of the other actors, he finds attractive and they
fluff each other. Of course, these �preparations� do not proceed in front of
the entire filming crew.�

The narrator said some ultimate words and the final credits appeared on the
screen. Draco lay in Harry�s lap and shook with laughter. He looked up and saw
Harry gazing down on him as if he had grown a second head.

�You think that was funny?� Harry asked and the blonde thought Harry would
start gagging every minute. He sat up, still hilarity sparkling in his eyes,
and ran his hand through Harry�s locks.

�Not really, some of the things were really squirmy, but� Draco began chuckling
again while talking. �Fluffer, oh my, that�s the cutest
word I�ve heard in a long time.�

Harry�s face turned a strange colour, something close to green. �But you heard
what it means, didn�t you?�

�Of course.� Draco said indignant. �But, if you don�t
think about it, the word is funny. Fluffer.� He said again, just to say it. Harry rolled his eyes and
picked Draco up from the couch. He didn�t even want to think about the outcome
of Draco�s new affection for this weird word.

The last time it had happened, it had been the word �rubber-ducky�. Every
bloody second word of the Slytherin had been rubber-ducky. It had taken one
whole week until he got bored with it.

He flopped the blond on the bed and didn�t even care
to undress him.

�Fluffer.� Draco said with
pure excitement in his voice and chuckled. Harry crawled under the blankets and
pressed a soft kiss on Draco�s forehead.

�Night, love.�

�Night, Flu� er, muffin.� Draco chuckled.
Harry groaned. The brunette rolled around and let Draco alone to get all hyper
about this porno film term. �Fluffer� was the last thing
he heard when finally falling asleep.

DAY� 02

This was worse than rubber-ducky. And if this sentence makes no sense to you,
you haven�t read the story properly till now

Harry was close to tears. He sat in front of the fireplace and massaged his temples.
Draco�s new obsession, yes, obsession; it had grown to one in Harry�s opinion,
was driving him mad. The boy overacted a bit, but this bit was enough.

This morning they had gone to the grocery and Draco didn�t keep his mouth shut,
just like at breakfast. But in public it was hell. Harry was so embarrassed, he
thought about sixty percent of the other customers did know what Draco was constantly
saying, regarding the looks they sent them.

If so, there were more perverts out in the world than he had thought. Or they
just stared, because Draco was repeating a nonsense word again and again. Not
even children had such phases.

�Fluffer� Harry shuddered. The word repulsed him. He
had even tried to snog Draco into silence earlier, but when he needed to let go
of Draco�s sweet pink lips to breathe, the little git couldn�t help it and said
�Hmm, fluffer fluffer.�

Images of the documentary had flooded Harry�s mind and he had pushed away from
Draco. He couldn�t even touch the Slytherin anymore without getting sick or
thinking about trying to strangle him.

Harry heard the kitchen swing-door flap and knew that Draco was in the living
room. He didn�t look up and remained on the floor in front of the warm
crackling fire. Draco sat on the couch behind him and ran one finger over
Harry�s back.

�Fluffer.� Draco grinned.
Harry swallowed hard.

�Fluffer.� Spoken quickly. �Fluuuuuuuffer.� Stretching the word
almost endlessly. �Fluffer.� Singing the word. �Fluffer.�
Purring the word. It wouldn�t take long and Draco
would start to perform the word pantomimic.

Harry pressed his eyes shut. That purr was his purr. Draco only used it to call
his name. At least he had thought so.

�Fluffer, fluffer,
fluffer, fluffer.�
It turned into a chant and Harry concentrated on his breathing not to scream in
agony.

�Draco, love, please. I beg you, stop it.� He said calmly, in complete despair
and pressed every word through heavy breaths. The brunette suddenly felt Draco approaching
him and lifted his head slowly. Malfoy was on all four next to him and looked
at him through half-lidded eyes.

�Muffin,� he purred and Harry�s eyes lit up; he hadn�t said the bad F-word, and
we�re not talking about �Fuck�, mind you. Draco crawled a little closer and
licked slowly along Harry�s cheek. �Hmmm,�

�Not Fluffer, not fluffer.�
Harry begged mentally.

�Harry.�

The saviour of the wizarding world growled lowly and threw Draco down to the
floor and crawled on him. �Gods, finally.� He groaned and began playing havoc
with Draco. His lips were claimed in a bruising kiss, his shirt was torn open
and Harry clawed at the slacks furiously.

The kiss broke and he looked down on the blond. Malfoy looked up at him with an
evil smirk on his lips and Harry knew right away what would happen.

�No, no, no. Baby, please don�t. No!� Draco wiggled his eyebrows and wetted his
lips. His mouth opened slowly and Harry closed his eyes, waiting for the
inevitable.

�Three, Two, One�

Harry felt like Draco spoke in slow motion. �Fllluuuuuuuffeeeeer.� His head dropped on Draco�s shoulder
and he rolled down from his lover.

�You�re insane. A nutcase. Stark
raving bonkers.� Harry mumbled when he stood up and went to the bedroom
door. �I go to bed. Night, Draco.�

�Muffin, wait. It�s only seven.�

�But I can�t bear your momentary antics anymore. I rather lie in bed all
evening than hear this bloody word one more time.�� Harry carded his hair with his fingers, a
motion he had adapted when being nervous or exhausted, and vanished behind the
bedroom door, once again hearing Draco scream �Fluffer�.

Harry fell on the bed and sighed. Back then he had hated rubber duckies, but now� now he wished them back. They were so
much cuter than fluffer. The brunette shuddered at
his own reminder and hit himself mentally. Why of all people needed his boyfriend
to be nuts?

DAY 03

The dark haired young man awoke in an empty bed. Had
he slept alone? He looked over to the other side of the bed and saw the
dishevelled blanket. No, at least they still shared a bed.

Harry stood up and went to his wardrobe, picking out a new set of clothes,
before taking a shower. The bedroom door opened and Harry sighed. There it
would go again. He felt like being misplaced in his own flat.

�Good morning, fluffer.� Harry tensed and glared into
the drawer full of socks.

�Don�t you dare calling me that ever again.� He hissed
and closed the drawer. Never before had he been that angry with Draco and that after
only getting up. There was no �good morning� or kiss,
he just stared at Draco�s sexy form, wrapped in a towel.

The blond went closer to him and brought his pale hand up to caress over
Harry�s stubbly cheek. The brunette leaned into the touch. He was too weak, he simply couldn�t stay angry with his lover.

�What�s wrong?� Draco asked and received only a snort. �Is there something
wrong, fluffer?� He asked innocently. Harry didn�t
see the mischief in his eyes and glared daggers at him. He swatted Draco�s hand
away and growled angrily.

�Draco, this hadn�t even been funny two days ago. Don�t call me that ever again
and shut up��

�Or?� The Slytherin asked and ran his hands over
Harry�s covered chest. He could feel the brunette shake with anger and smirked
evilly when being sure Harry wouldn�t see. He felt horribly neglected since
they had watched the documentary and he knew it was his fault. Not �fault� per
se, but maybe he had provoked it a little. Oh he missed his rubber ducky.

�Or I�ll shut you up.� Harry grumbled moping and missed again the smirk on
Malfoy�s lips and the spark in his eyes.

�Oh really?� Draco asked teasingly and leaned closer,
brushing his lips against Harry�s Adam�s apple. The brunette moaned that Draco
felt the throat vibrating against his lips and chuckled.

Harry was promptly aware of what was going on. Pah,
as if he would let Draco win, if Draco played mind games with him. He dropped
the clean clothes on the bed and grabbed Draco�s arms to push him a bit away.
Looking at the slighter blond, he raised one questioning eyebrow, but kept
quiet.

Draco licked his lips. �I want you to shut me up, fluffer.�
The Gryffindor growled low and threw Draco on the bed behind him in one swift
motion. He climbed atop him and straddled the small waist. Leaning down, Harry
began nipping at Draco's chin.

�You really want me to shut you up?� he asked sexily and began kissing a path
down along Draco�s chest. He reached the end of the ribcage and traced the last
ribs with scraping his teeth along them.

Draco�s breath had quickly turned erratic and his hands were tangled in Harry�s
unruly hair. The towel around his waist started to sport a tent and he began
bucking his hips to build up some pressure. �Yes, yeesss.�
He squeaked when Harry bit one of his nipples. �Shut me u-�

The Slytherin�s eyes turned huge and he stared at Harry
in confusion. He hadn�t, had he? He wouldn�t dare, would he? Draco�s huge grey
eyes turned into a dark glare and he shoved Golden Boy down from him. Harry stood
up from the bed and looked smug.

Draco sat up and pulled the cloth out of his mouth. With narrowed eyes he
looked up at Harry and spoke in a deathly calm voice. �You.
Didn�t. Just put. A sock. In. My. Mouth?�

�Oh, I did.� Harry said in a honeyed tone, sounding quite good-humoured.
�You asked me for it. I�ll take a shower now.� With that said,
Potter left the room with a satisfied feeling in his chest, although his pants
were painfully tight and left a ranting indignant Draco Malfoy behind.

---

Ninety-eight, ninety-nine, one-hundred.

The bathroom door opened and Harry rolled his eyes, already standing under the
shower. Sometimes Draco was so predictable. He would now start raving and
ranting and scolding until Harry would storm out of the shower in annoyance. He
simply would try to mar the relaxation Harry tried to find under the shower.
But Harry wouldn�t allow that, he told himself, he knew this strategy long
enough to be immune.

The glass door was vigorously pulled open and Harry was forcefully shoved
against the cold tiled wall. This turn of action hadn�t crossed his mind at
all, but he would lie if saying he didn�t like it.

Draco pressed his naked form against Harry, only the towel still wrapped around
his hips. The brunette could feel the hardness under the fast wetting
terry-cloth and wanted to tear it down, but his hands were in a tight grip,
pressed against the wall. Harry watched the cloth getting heavy with water and
sliding lower and lower on Draco�s beautiful, slender hips. The towel finally
loosened, but was caught between their bodies and denied, to Harry�s
disappointment, full body contact still.

�Don�t do that ever again.� Draco hissed close enough to Harry�s ear to drown
the noises of the running water.

�What?� Harry asked innocently. �But I need to shower, or I�ll start stinking.�

Draco growled angrily and pushed Harry harder against the wall. �I mean the
blasted sock, you git.�

�Ooh, the sock.� Harry tore his eyes wide open as if he finally began to
understand, but inside he was rejoicing. The hideous f-word hadn�t left Draco�s
mouth one time the last minutes. �But you said you wanted me to shut you up.�
Harry added and thought, if he would sound more
innocent a halo would appear above his head.

The blond growled again angrily against his ear and began grinding his erection
into Harry�s now equally hard, but still towel covered flesh. Draco let go of
the Gryffindor�s hands and removed the obstructive
cloth between their bodies.

�I didn�t mean it like THAT, you berk.� Draco sighed and his anger turned into
surrender. This, in his opinion, was a lost fight he fought. He rested his head
on Harry�s shoulder and let the jet of water wash over his back. Golden Boy
sensed the defeat and grinned from one ear to the other. He turned his head and
licked along Draco�s ear, before whispering sensually.

�You see, I know one more way to shut you up.� He saw the goose bumps all over
Draco�s body and without waiting for a reaction, he
grabbed the Slytherin�s shoulders and pushed him with
gentle force down on his knees.

Draco grabbed Harry�s hips and looked up at the dark haired young man with lust
oozing eyes. �And I started thinking you don�t want me anymore.� He took Harry
in his mouth and began sucking slowly.

�Oh, shut up, fluffer and do your job.� Harry groaned
and dug his hands in Draco�s wet strands.

Malfoy let go of Harry�s erection and looked up with an evil grin playing over
his mouth. �Actually, you don�t need me, if I�m a fluffer.
They just make sure that you�re erect, nothing else.� He smartarsed
delighted and felt Harry�s hands clench in his hair.

�Draconis�� The boy-who-had-survived threatened and
pulled a willing Draco back into the task on hand.

This was a much better way to shut Draco Malfoy up than a lousy sock, although
the sock had been a new way apparently leading to an amazing blow-job. Harry
needed to keep that in mind.

��

Gods, I�m REALLY unhappy with this and I only post it, to fulfil my part in the
challenge.
- 1
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WORD of WISDOM - Not!