That Idiot Hagrid | By : Lomonaaeren Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Harry/Snape Views: 5577 -:- Recommendations : 1 -:- Currently Reading : 1 |
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter and am not making any money from this story. |
Title: That Idiot Hagrid
Summary: J. K. Rowling and associates own these characters. I am writing this story for fun and not profit.
Pairing: Harry/Severus pre-slash
Warnings: Angst
Rating: PG-13
Wordcount: 3300
Summary: Professor Snape thought that he would have a dignified Animagus form. He doesn't. Actually, it's very far from dignified. And now Harry Potter knows about it.
Author's Notes: Another of my Advent fics, written for an anonymous request that is the summary. Happy Advent!
That Idiot Hagrid Severus tried standing up as far as he could in this form, resting his paws on the glass that encircled him, and glaring. It wasn't effective. Hagrid just chuckled--Severus's sensitive ears flinched back in the wake of such a noise--and bent down so his face was opposite Severus's. "Isn't he jest the cutest thing!" he said, and tried to tickle Severus beneath the chin with one finger in a way that Severus could not tolerate. Severus longed to be able to transform back and rake Hagrid with a vivid description of who, exactly, he had picked up on the edge of the Forbidden Forest. But he couldn't do that without revealing exactly what his Animagus form was as well as who he was, and he sulkily retreated towards the far side of the cage, with one thump of his hind foot. Hagrid wasn't put off. He stood up and chuckled again, and said something to his boarhound that was distorted by the glass. Severus put one paw up to his ear, and then made himself take it down again. Too much unnatural behavior might stir even this imbecile Hagrid to think he was an Animagus. But it was unfair that this form had such sensitive ears Severus was simultaneously overwhelmed by blasts of sound and couldn't make them out because his "natural" senses were attuned to other sorts of input. He lollopped back and forth, watching Hagrid's boarhound Fang, who was watching him with none of Hagrid's humor in his teeth and eyes. Hagrid might talk constantly about how harmless his dog was, but that was obviously a foul lie, rather like the claim that Hagrid took good care of the animals he picked up. And yes, perhaps Fang had come on Severus just after his initial transformation, when he was still staring in stunned disappointment down at his new body, and barked so hard that Severus's animal instincts had taken over and he'd run. He would have turned around in seconds and been able to master the situation if Hagrid hadn't come, scolded the dog, and picked up Severus in two huge hands. He didn't even notice when Severus kicked and squealed and bit him. He'd brought him back here and plopped him into this cage and was cooing over him in a form that Severus desperately did not want anyone to see him in. The thought of the laughter that would follow, how Hagrid would stare at him and then let his eyes sparkle with amusement--and they would do that every time he saw Severus, for as long as both of them worked here--made Severus keep to this form, hunched miserably down in the cage. He kicked and started when Fang barked again, and barely listened to Hagrid admonishing the dog. He hunched down and wondered what to do. Then the door of Hagrid's cottage opened, and a voice that Severus would probably hear if he was dead called cheerfully, "Who wants a Snidget?" Severus crouched, in the fervent hope of being overlooked, while Fang took off barking towards the newcomer and Hagrid bellowed, "Harry! Come in! What's that you've got?" The one thing Severus could feel grateful for towards Harry Potter at the moment was giving Hagrid something to care about besides Severus. But this added a newer, unhappier wrinkle to the problem. Even more than Severus didn't want Hagrid to find out what he was, he didn't want Potter to find out who he was. Potter held out something small and golden and fluttering that, yes, did look like a Snidget towards Hagrid, and shook his head. "I caught an illegal game using the poor thing instead of a Snitch. We have no idea where it came from, and it has a broken wing, so I thought I'd let you nurse it. At least those involved are going to get what's coming to them," he added, with a vicious smile that made him look rather unlike the Potter Severus thought he knew. "They should!" Hagrid snarled, and then went off in a rant that Severus felt he could safely ignore. He concentrated on staying still, something that luckily his new form was good at, and avoiding Potter's eye. Hagrid's hut was already crowded with cages in which baby birds fluttered, tiny houses for wounded worms, a pallet on which a unicorn foal with a broken leg rested, and several small glass bowls of fish. There was every chance that Potter would overlook him in the general clutter. But Potter was glancing around the hut with the air of someone who visited often (of course he was, Severus thought) and caught sight of him. "Hullo, who's this?" he asked, and stepped away from Hagrid, who cradled the Snidget carefully in such giant hands that Severus couldn't see it at all. "You caught a black bunny!" Severus glared at Potter as hard as a rabbit could glare. It wouldn't make the situation better, but it made Severus feel better, and that was the point. And it wasn't like Potter would know who he was, either, as long as Severus was careful to make his escape later. "Yeah, Fang was chasing 'im," said Hagrid, although he didn't look over, seeming fascinated with the Snidget in his hand. "Poor little blighter." Severus was unsure whether Hagrid was referring to him or the bird. "Let me get a cage for 'im..." And Hagrid stepped delicately around his different animals, proving it was the bird. "I've never seen a black rabbit like you before," Potter said, as if to himself. His eyes traced over Severus's form with a care and devotion that made Severus wonder what his game was. Did Potter perhaps hunt rabbits to eat on the sly? "Or--maybe you're a hare. That would explain the size." Severus sat up and glared harder, and twitched his ears into a position from which he hoped he could hear better. He also firmed the muscles in his legs, so that he wouldn't go bounding off to the far corner of the cage if Potter did something that triggered his stupid instincts. He would sit here, and he would prove he was better than anything else, certainly the machinations of a stupid boy who by now should have learned-- Potter's jaw abruptly fell open. He looked around, as if to make sure that both Hagrid and his dog were busy, and then leaned closer. "Professor Snape?" he whispered. Severus's huge hind foot drummed against the floor of the cage before he could help himself. But he was furious, and no longer as in control of his movements as he wanted to be. How had Potter known? How could Severus have taken all these precautions, and still been found out anyway? "It's the glare," Potter said, as if answering the question. "No animal could glare like that, and I should know what it looks like by now." Yes, he should, Severus reluctantly told himself. Potter visited Hogwarts regularly since the war, and he often came to Severus's office under the misguided impression that he should apologize so that they could be friends. Severus had often dismissed him with the same glare. If only he had taken up normal behavior for a rabbit, sat in the corner and groomed his ears, paid Potter no mind, even turned to chew on the enormous pile of lettuce and other greens that Hagrid had deposited for him, Potter would have noticed nothing. "Are you stuck in your Animagus form?" Potter frowned. "Well, unfortunately, Hagrid can't do anything about that. He hasn't cared for any Animagi before, other than the times he tried to feed Sirius when he was here in dog form. I think I'd better help you." Severus uttered a highly irate squeal, and leaped up to kick the glass right in front of Potter's face. Potter retreated, looking mildly startled, and Severus settled back on his haunches and glared again. He hoped Potter, who had proven so unexpectedly stupidly good at understanding so far, would get the message this time. Severus wasn't stuck in his Animagus form, Merlin forbid. He didn't want to reveal himself and be laughed at for the rest of his life. Of course, since Potter had now discovered him, Severus supposed that was inevitable anyway. But he could at least avoid showing off the truth to more than one person. Oddly enough, he didn't think Potter would tell Hagrid, especially if Severus expressed his disapproval of that plan strongly. He drummed one foot on the floor of the cage and looked meaningfully at Potter, then at Hagrid. He thought that message was clear, too. Whether or not Potter thought Severus had messed up the Animagus transformation, he would understand that Severus didn't want to stay here. "Fine," Potter said, in a mutter that might have been meant to embrace one or both of them, and turned around with a smile on his face that Severus thought patently false and unlikely to fool even a half-giant. And when had he become used to evaluating Potter's smiles, anyway? Severus leaned his paws heavily against the glass and thought that he would have to have a hard talk with himself about Potter and the consequences of his visits. "Can I have this rabbit, Hagrid?" Potter asked the half-giant. "I think we would get along." "Oh, o' course!" More preoccupied with the Snidget, Hagrid waved his hand. As relieved as he was that Hagrid would never know he had been caught as a rabbit, Severus wrinkled his nose in disgust. So a bloody bird with a broken wing that would heal nicely was of more importance than a rabbit his dog had chased? "Take care of him! I don't think he knows his way around real well." Severus fumed with silent kicks as Potter picked up the cage and carried it back towards the castle. Yes, he was such a naive little rabbit for having a moment of weakness. "There," said Potter, once they were safely in the dungeons and away from the notice of any other professors. It was near exam time, and there were no students near Severus's office, either, as if they hoped he would forget about their existence and the existence of complicated exam questions if they just stayed away from him. "Now you can get out." And he laid the cage on the floor carefully, not only not jolting Severus but offering him a way out that wouldn't involve scrambling. Severus hopped out and sat there staring at Potter. Potter stared back. "No," he said, finally. "I want to make sure that you're not stuck." That prompted Severus to change back just so that he could give Potter a piece of his mind. He concentrated, and felt his body blur and twist, like a spell he was able to cast more through muscle memory than through memorizing it. In seconds, he was on hands and knees, and stood up so that he towered over Potter, rejoicing it was this way when he was human. Potter continued to regard him with a solemn face from which all traces of humor had been banished. Severus stalked forwards and jabbed a finger into Potter's chest. "You will keep this to yourself," he hissed. Potter shrugged. "I know that you have to go to the Ministry and register. But sure, that's fine. I won't tell anyone here. I wasn't planning on it," he added, with a little more of the spark that Severus recognized. "I thought you could tell that from the way I acted in Hagrid's house, but...oh, never mind." He turned and started walking down the corridor, leaving Severus to stare after him in surprise. Only for a moment, though, and then Severus increased his pace to catch Potter. He reached out and grabbed Potter's shoulder. Potter turned around and glared. He had a hand on his wand. For some reason, Severus felt surprised by that. He shook the emotion away and crowded Potter back into a wall, though Potter made him fight for every centimeter of ground gained. "Listen to me," Severus growled into Potter's ear. He almost expected to see it twitch back like his own had when he was a rabbit, but it remained stubbornly still. "I want some guarantee." "My word is going to have to be enough for you." Potter folded his arms and traded an ugly glare with Severus. "After all, it's not like I'm going to submit to an Unbreakable Vow if you ask it of me." Severus was caught unexpected by that, too. He stared, and Potter turned away a second later, shaking his head, and running his hand through his hair. "Sorry, I didn't mean that," he muttered. "I just...I give you my word. I promise. You'd think that you could trust that by now." "You sneaked into my Pensieve when I was not around," Severus began, falling back on Potter's most comprehensive crime. "And I didn't tell anyone about it, did I?" Potter whipped his head around to face Severus. "You must have noticed a distinct lack of people taunting you about it the next day! Or even the next year!" His breath was so fast that Severus experienced a brief surge of worry that Potter would hyperventilate and faint on him, but Potter looked disinclined to do that, even if it would be better. "I won't tell anyone about this, either!" Severus rubbed his forehead and closed his eyes. "Perhaps I can trust you," he finally admitted, and hoped that Potter would feel how hard the shift was for him, the weight being lifted out of the middle of his chest. "But I do not want to." "I'm sorry for that, then." Potter's voice had steadied once more, and he looked Severus in the eyes as if he pitied him, which made Severus stiffen. "But I won't betray what your Animagus form is, and I won't--I won't visit here again, either, if that's what you want." "I will not let you go without an explanation for why you have come so many times," Severus said harshly, and moved his hands in to clamp Potter's arms at his sides when Potter shifted uneasily. "It cannot be merely to visit your friends, as you frequently come to see me as well." Potter met his eyes. "It was what I told you the first time I came." "Repeat the words, then," Severus demanded. He was not about to say that he did not remember what Potter had said, because that might make him seem weak, as well. Potter's lip twitched, but in a way that didn't make Severus think he was verging on a smile. Instead, he held Severus's gaze and said, very quietly, "I'm looking for a way to make things right between us." "How can they be right?" Severus asked, exasperated by a Gryffindor's weakness as he had been so often. "You were my charge. I owed you a life-debt I didn't want to owe. I survived without your help. I told you how to sacrifice yourself." "I know all that," said Potter, and his voice cracked a little. "But that just gives me more reasons to try and make things right. I know that it can't ever be normal between us. I just thought..." "Explain," said Severus, with a shake when Potter's gaze wandered away from him again. This time, Potter threw off his hands, and he was visibly and redly angry. "Fine. I thought if it couldn't be normal between us, it could at least be a good extreme, you know? Something that--if there's this emotion here that won't ever go away, it could at least be positive emotion instead of negative." Severus shook his head, refusing whatever Potter was trying to say. He wasn't about to let Potter pretend that everything was good and normal and regular when it wasn't. "I will not listen to this." "Fine." Seeing Potter about to turn and walk out of the castle again, Severus changed his mind. "Tell me what you mean." "I thought it could be," said Potter, and his voice roughened in a way that Severus was only used to hearing from himself when he was embarrassed, "passion. If it can't be anything else. And not anger, either." This time, his cheeks were the color of embers, and he refused to look at Severus. He had left himself wide open to laughter, of the sort that Severus had feared when he was in his Animagus form. And Severus couldn't even take advantage of it. He could only stand and stare, wondering how in the world Potter had come to that conclusion. It didn't take him long to decide, though. The evidence was there in Potter's own words. Potter was right that the situation between them wouldn't ever be normal. There were too many problems and twists and turns and aches in their past for that. But Potter wanted to spring beyond that, transform them. If passion was the only road he could see for the transformation to take, Severus shouldn't be surprised. A Gryffindor would think like that. He moved in. Potter looked up from where he was studying the stones of the floor, his mouth once again set in a stubborn line that Severus longed to erase from his face. "You can laugh at me," said Potter. "I don't care." For him to say that while every muscle of his body screamed how much he did care brought a complicated emotion into Severus's throat. He rested a hand on Potter's chest and listened to the thump of the heart that, like his, had gone on beating, and finally answered. "I am intrigued by the reason that you did not laugh at me today." Potter blinked and started to answer, but Severus shook his head, and Potter fell silent to listen with a bewildered expression on his face. "I want to find it out. I want to understand it. Right now, I can hear about it, but I cannot understand it." He looked Potter in the eye. "And the only way for you to explain it to me in a way that I can understand it is for you to come back and speak to me in more detail." There was a soft look in Potter's eyes. He nodded, long and slowly, and reached out as if he would touch Severus's face. Severus moved away. Potter would have to work for what he achieved. "Fine," said Potter, a bit breathless. "I can do that." He waited until Severus let go of the grip on his shoulders, and then gave a deep nod that was almost a bow. "See you next week?" Severus held Potter's gaze and decided that he wasn't about to let Potter get away with dictating the time of their meeting. "No." He waited until Potter was wilting a little, and then added, "Two days from now." Potter's smile was answering, and radiant. He almost skipped away up the corridor. Severus watched him go, shaking his head. He had intended to march right back into his office and revise the books he had studied on his way to completing the Animagus transformation, to find out if there was a way that a wizard could change his form. But now, he rather thought he would find a different research subject. Such as how to put some substance on his fur that would make big dogs sneeze their nostrils out if they tried to bite him, for example.The End.
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