Adult-FanFiction.org : Harry Potter

Lucky Strike	By : SpeedyTomato Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Harry/Sirius Views: 76008 -:- Recommendations : 4 -:- Currently Reading : 17
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter and make no money off this strange dance in JK Rowling's world.

Chapter List
- 9
- 10
- 11
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Chapter 9

Eying James and Lily as they came in, Severus crossed his arms and legs, scowling. The mere sight of them put him in a bad mood. Not only that, he wanted to throw a few spells in their direction for putting them all in this situation. He couldn't though. Not only wasn't it the right thing to do, they needed to handle this the 'adult' way, but the standard rule for such sessions was that wands weren't allowed. All of them had to have their wands locked in a box in the outer office, something he hated as he never wanted to be without it. He understood that, honestly he did, as sessions with Mind Healers tended to be emotional, thus the temptation would be there to do something like that. In this case, it was bound to come. So, he dealt with it accordingly.
After a glance at James and Lily, Remus leaned over then whispered to his already thunderous looking husband, “Just keep it under control, Severus. Let Healer Stuart handle it. It won't do any good if you and James go at it like you used to.”
“I know,” Severus told him, watching as the two came to take a seat across the table from him. “It's just the idea.”
Reaching out and putting a hand on Severus' leg under the table, Remus gave it a squeeze then told him, softly, “Don't let him antagonize you. Just focus on why we're here.”
Glaring at Snape, James assumed a pose much like his old nemesis, sitting there stiffly. Though he knew this was probably the best way to go about dealing with the situation, that didn't mean he liked it! For now, he would deal accordingly then press on when the time presented itself.
Taking a seat at the head of the table, Healer Stuart shuffled his notes, getting them together, then laid them in front of him, folding his hands and putting them on the mass of parchments. This wasn't going to be easy, that he knew, but he hoped it wouldn't degenerate into a shouting match the way so many similar meetings had in the past when it came to both parties trying to find common ground. Looking around, he said, “Before we start, I'll introduce myself to James and Lily.” Seeing the two nod, he said, “I'm Healer Stuart. I've been Harry's Mind Healer since he was rescued by Lucius. So, I'm well acquainted with all aspects of the situation we're faced with, not to mention what Harry deals with. While I can't impart much of what Harry discusses in sessions, as those are covered by Healer/patient confidentiality, I can divulge the basics when it comes to most of it.”
Seeing nods from the two, he pressed on, “What we plan to do here is to lay out the basics of what's going on and just what Harry works with on a daily basis so that the two of you have a better grasp of the full scope of what Harry deals with, the progress he's made, and other related aspects of his life so you truly understand what's happening. While there were pieces in many papers, especially after Lucius Malfoy rescued him, they were not only sensationalized, thus, in some cases, not factual, there was a great deal left out as well. Part of the latter we're going to cover because it's something Severus and Remus feel you need to know so you have the full scope of what Harry deals with. From there, we're going to press on to the current situation and discuss that.” Seeing stiff nods, he then continued. “How about I give you the most basic of what Harry dealt with from the time he was placed on that doorstep then we'll go forward.” After another nod, he gave them the most basics of the timeline they knew and what Harry had dealt with.
When he finished, he looked at James and Lily. James was looking down at the table, pale as a ghost. Lily was crying softly, dabbing her eyes with a tissue. Softly, he said, “Harry has had an incredibly hard life, most of which he still deals with on a daily basis in so many ways. None of what I told you is nice, I know, but we feel you needed the full scope of what happened to him, without some of the more graphic details, to understand that this isn't a case of Severus and Remus refusing to allow your request to see Harry for no reason. The problems here are immense. They are improving, that I'll give you, but, like with most therapy, it takes time.” Stopping, he looked between all parties then sighed, “Now, are there any questions so far?”
Reaching out to take his wife's hand, feeling her grip it tightly, James rubbed a trembling hand over his face. “Bloody hell,” he breathed. “How can someone do some of that to a child?”
“That's a question we all ask ourselves regularly, James,” Healer Stuart told him softly. “And we have no complete answers to give you, just what we can glean from research. To explain that would take days. So, we won't go into that end. Suffice it to say, Harry has problems, big ones.” Pressing on, flipping through notes he had on things Severus and Remus wanted to discuss, he got to the place that was best to start with then moved forward, “Let's now get to the current situation and how it affects so much.” Seeing more nods as he looked around, he then sighed, “I think the first thing you need to understand is that Harry isn't like most people his age, obviously. In one aspect, he's far more mature because of all he had to live through and deal with. In other areas what is 'normal' for Harry, isn't something any of us would consider 'normal' in any way. He had very limited interaction with the 'normal' world. I believe most of that essentially came from television rather than actually dealing with the 'normal' world. So, what he knows and does doesn't always fit in with what you would expect from someone his age.” Softening his voice, he asked, “I believe that you have a son a little over a year younger than Harry? At least that's my understanding.”
“Yeah, Lily was pregnant with Jamie when that night happened long ago,” James admitted, not looking up.
Nodding at that, Healer Stuart said, “I think, in this case, because you have a child so close in age, you need to truly understand that you can't ever compare Harry to your son. They have led lives that are about as opposite as one can get. I don't know Jamie, so I can't speak to what he's like, but I can assure you that it's doubtful he's anything like Harry.” Leaning back, knowing that they were about to get into the most prickly issues, the ones that were bound to get emotions stirred, he said, “Now, let's go into what's going on at this point. Before I do, I want to remind all of you that shouting, yelling, screaming and threats are going to get us nowhere with the situation. We need to stay calm, though we might not feel that way, on the topic.” Seeing nods, he pressed forward. “I'm going to start with one thing I'm not sure you know, James and Lily; some of what Harry's like.”
“As anyone that thought about the situation with the knowledge of what Harry dealt with over the years could figure out, Harry is a wary young man. Very much so. He trusts almost no one. There are very few he lets close to him. I believe, and Severus and Remus can correct me if I'm wrong, only one of them is a woman.” Stopping, he looked at the two to see if he was right.
“Narcissa Malfoy is it for that,” Severus said gruffly, trying not to glare at the two across the table. “There are a couple of others that he will tolerate being around for short periods of time. Madam Bones he will because he's had to deal with her when it came to so much with his case. That's all, though.”
“I thought as much,” Stuart said with a nod. “Harry trusts almost no one. There is also the fact that he's not a forgiving young man. The situation all of you are in now is heavily affected by that. Now, I understand that you want to have some kind of relationship with Harry.”
“He's our son. We just want to get to know him,” Lily said, having herself under better control. “That and to tell him we're sorry for the mistakes we made. If we could undo those, we would.”
Sighing, looking down at the table, Stuart shook his head then said, “I think you need to realize that none of those are probably possible at this time. And probably never will be.” Seeing James look like he was about to open his mouth, he held up a hand and said, “Let me finish what I have to say. Any questions you have might be answered that way.” Seeing a nod, he pressed on, “First and foremost here, I think I need to make you fully understand something. To do that, you also need to accept something that you don't seem to have done yet. That is that though you are Harry's birth parents, you are no longer considered his parents. Severus and Remus are, both legally and Harry views them as such.”
“We're always going to be his parents,” James snapped, glaring at the man. “Nothing will change that.”
“You will always be his birth parents,” Stuart reiterated. “That cannot change. However, for everything else, that is Severus and Remus. Harry is their son. To work with what's here, you need to understand that part and accept it. Not only was the adoption formally done in a court of law, but Harry views Remus and Severus as his fathers. You won't get anywhere with him if you try to persist in forcing the issue. It took Harry more time than you can imagine to view both of them that way. You need to remember that up until Lucius rescued him, Harry didn't know what a parent was, other than the basic definition of one. In fact, he had no idea why he was placed on that doorstep. His theories on that topic weren't nice ones either. To try to force such an issue will just result in not only a backlash against you, personally, but cause a major setback in his healing. I do understand why you feel that way, but from a legal standpoint, you are no longer related to Harry. That's all that matters in this case. That is something you need to accept. I know that's difficult, but to press forward you have to. Nothing can come of the situation if you don't.”
“We will never accept that,” James told the man in an icy voice. “He's our son, I don't give a damn what anyone else says.”
“You gave up any right to call yourselves his parents the night you abandoned him on that doorstep,” Severus said, glaring at James. He was desperately trying to let Stuart handle this, but he felt he had to jump in here.
“We did not abandon him!” James snarled, glaring at Snape.
“Legally and morally you did, James,” Remus told his 'old friend' softly, looking at him. “You left him in a dangerous situation to run off. The reason for it doesn't matter.”
“We did not!” James reiterated, voice deadly.
Sighing, figuring that this was coming anyway, Stuart held up a placating hand, “We all need to calm down. Take a deep breath, get yourselves under control and we'll continue.” Waiting a couple of moments for everyone to take a deep breath and seeing James relax slightly, Stuart said, softly, “I think this is a topic we do need to quantify, honestly.” Looking at James and Lily, he said, keeping his voice soft, “Severus is right. By Albus Dumbledore leaving Harry on that doorstep it's considered abandonment. I don't care about the reason for it. If he had knocked and then handed him over to the Dursleys, that wouldn't have been. The only other exception are newly instituted laws about safe havens for turning children over. That's all. Those don't qualify here as those laws weren't in place at the time. Not only do the courts view this as abandonment, Harry does as well. Even before he found out you weren't dead, he saw what Albus Dumbledore did as abandoning him in a situation where the worst could easily happen, then did. Minerva McGonagall was taken to task for her part in that when it came to light because, legally, our system declares that it's abandonment.”
“Why didn't he just hand Harry over to Petunia?” Remus asked, shaking his head. “Merlin! That wasn't hard! All he had to do was knock on the door and hand him over, then none of this nightmare would have happened!” That was a question he had asked himself for years and now, since he had two people here that had a hand in it, he wanted a bloody answer!
“That is a fair question,” Stuart said softly, looking at James and Lily. “Harry wants to know as well.”
Looking down at the table, twisting the soggy tissue she was holding between her fingers, Lily shut her eyes then said, voice barely audible, “Because if Albus had done that, Petunia would have refused to take him. If we went about it this way, when she touched the basket, it would have activated Blood Wards and the magic would have required her to take him in. It's all we had.”
“Bloody hell,” Severus snarled, reaching up to rub his eyes. Shaking his head, he glared at the two, “So, you were going to force two people that probably didn't want the child and would treat him badly because of what he was to take him?”
“We had no other option,” James told him gruffly. “Harry would be safe there because of the Blood Wards that activated. There was nowhere else that would have that protection. It was the best we could do.”
“Well, he wasn't safe, was he?” Severus snarled.
“If we could take that back, we would have done it another way,” James shot back, glaring at Snape. “We can't! We made a damned mistake, Snape! We admit that!”
“Even admitting that doesn't begin to fix the situation,” Stuart interjected before this could degenerate any further into a shouting match. “You both need to understand that. Saying you made a mistake and you're sorry doesn't start to mend a horrible situation.”
“It's a start,” James snarled at the man. “All someone needs to do is give us a chance to do that and make Harry listen.”
“You can't force Harry to listen,” Stuart told him gently. “That's entirely Harry's choice. The same with giving you the chance to say such a thing. Both have been rejected by him when the topic was broached.”
“Someone, somewhere, needs to talk to him then. That's all. Make him see sense!” James told them, clenching his fists as a way to deal with the situation.
“James, you need to understand and remember what I said earlier; Harry is not a forgiving young man. He's been used too much over his life to give second chances. That's not going to change any time soon. It may in the years to come as he works through the mass of problems he has, but he's nowhere close to reconsidering that stance,” Stuart told him with a shake of his head. “We won't even delve into the trust factor it would take to bring about that change. Those are years off, if they ever come.”
“I get that, alright?” James said with an exasperated sigh. “This is different than the past, though! We won't ever make those kinds of mistakes again. Trust me, we've learned our lesson there.”
“James, Harry won't ever trust you,” Remus told him softly, looking at his old friend. “He's told all of us that clearly. We won't even go into that this situation won't happen again. There are others though and he knows it. What you did—Merlin! Harry told me when we talked about it at one point that you've proven you can't be trusted when it comes to him. Not only is there what you did, something he clearly told me tells him you shouldn't be trusted, but the situation with Sirius. If you were willing just to take off, knowing Sirius would be a suspect in your deaths, without putting anything in place to prove he didn't do it, it shows Harry that you aren't someone he should trust as you're apt to pull something else in the future that will show that yet again.” Lowering his voice, he added, “And I can easily understand his stance on that and agree with it. If you're willing to screw the person you called your best friend, you're going to do it again. Why should Harry trust you if you're willing to do that?”
“Leave the mess with Sirius out of this,” James barked at Remus. “One has nothing to do with the other! Harry doesn't need to worry about that part anyway!”
“It's all tied in together, whether you like it or not, Potter,” Severus told him, voice a snarl. “Black is a huge part of his life. He's well aware of what happened there and how the man suffered over what you did. Black is far more forgiving than Harry is and he's not going to do that either. You can't expect Harry to ignore a pattern of behavior from both of you when it's that clear. It's too telling for him to do that.”
“This isn't a pattern of behavior, Sev,” Lily said softly, looking at her old friend. “It was all tied together from one situation. Nothing more. We wouldn't do that again.”
“It's doubtful Harry will ever see it that way,” Stuart told her softly. “What happened was a big enough event that, whether you would or not, is lost in that. And if you take that step once, it's easy to take it again, though it might not be the same thing. That's something he's aware of, too, from a different angle. As no one has explained the real reason behind why you did this, the stance isn't apt to change any time soon. You left him once. Why should he chance letting you into his life then risk you doing it again for whatever reason you may think justifies it?”
“Bloody hell,” James huffed, rolling his eyes. “How long are we going to have to pay for this one mistake before people give us a damned break?!”
“The totality of what went on because of what you did is immense. You need to accept that,” Stuart told him gently. “Harry's whole life was affected by this one choice you made, in a way that isn't repairable. He deals with not only the emotional aspect of what he was forced to do, but a physical one. He’s had several surgeries by now to repair the damage done to his body. He still has two more to go before they think they finally have as much fixed as they can. That is the cost of your 'mistake', James.”
“What needs fixed?” Lily asked, looking between the other three. “We've heard surgeries mentioned, but no one has said what they were for.”
“The night Lucius found him he was being forced to have sex with a donkey. What kind of damage do you think that causes to a teenager's body?” Severus shot her way. Seeing her go pale again and eyes tear up, he shook his head, “He was bleeding internally from that and would have died if they hadn't done surgery that night. We won't even go into the massive infection he was dealing with over damage that was done to him from such activities that resulted in injuries that were left untreated. This went on for years. Then there were the so-called BDSM shows that were nothing more than someone seeing how sadistic they could get with Harry's body. The whole goal was to inflict damage and make him bleed. That needs repaired. Add on to that the sexual abuse started shortly after he was taken off that doorstep then you have the full picture of what went on and why he needs areas fixed.”
Turning green, James shook his head, trying not to envision what Snape just said. “You're lying to make this sound worse.” Honestly? He didn't think that was the case, but he hoped.
“I assure you, he's not,” Stuart told him with a shake of his head. “We have complete medical documentation on all of it. Harry—we know some of what went on from him as he'll discuss some of it. Other parts he won't. So, even at this juncture, we don't have a complete picture of what torture he went though. Harry needs plenty repaired to give him back not only basic functionality most people have normally, but to fix problems he has with basic biological functions that were affected by what happened. Some of it is cosmetic, we admit that, to get rid of scars, but most is not. This is all the result of the years of physical and sexual abuse he suffered since being taken.” Softening his tone, he added, “This is what your 'one mistake' caused him, James. And I'll be honest that it's the easiest of the problems to repair. Look at all of this from Harry's perspective. He knows what happened and now knows that you didn't die like he had been told. How forgiving would you be if the situations were reversed?”
Looking down at the table, James wanted to start shouting, but resisted the urge. It stung, it really did. All they had planned for was now for naught as what they did caused something none of them could ever have imagined. Lifting his eyes, he glared at the two across the table from him. They weren't the cause, he knew that, but he wanted to lash out at someone over so much. “You can't lay all this on us and our mistake,” James said, tone uneven, shaking his head.
“You were the catalyst for allowing it to happen,” Stuart told him softly. “That you need to accept. It's how Harry sees it as well. That's something I won't dissuade him from either as he's correct. He blames plenty for what went on in his life. Most are the ones that abused him or sold him to the child molesters over the years. He blames the people who 'owned' him for it and what they did or forced him to do. He blames Albus Dumbledore for placing him on that doorstep without the most basic of charms to keep someone from taking him. And now he blames you for a lie you fabricated so you could run off and abandon him. There is plenty of blame to go around and you own your part of it. In this case, there is no justice either. Nothing, no matter what it is, will ever be able to undo what Harry went through and still deals with. He is left with physical and emotional scars that will never go away.”
“There is no fixing this, James.” Remus told him with a shake of his head. “Saying you're sorry and won't do it again, something he's not going to believe anyway, isn't even a start towards fixing it. This isn't school anymore where you serve detention for some of what you did wrong. Your choices handed Harry over to the worst people in the world to use as nothing more than a sex toy for their perverse pleasures. I don't care what 'reason' you have for pulling this stunt, it doesn't justify what you did.”
Rubbing a now trembling hand over his face, James shook his head, feeling ill. “I love my son,” he said softly. “I never stopped loving him.”
“Yet you dropped him on a doorstep, ran off, never bothering to check on him in the time you were gone, and had more children,” Severus snorted, glaring at the man. “That shows just how much you love him.”
“One of Harry's questions is why you didn't bother to check on him,” Stuart said softly. “Can you answer that?”
“We needed to stay hidden because of the danger we knew would start to play out as he grew,” James said cryptically looking down at the table. Shaking his head, he added, “The war isn't over. It just went into an intermission that went on for years.” That's all he was going to say on the matter.
“You apparently weren't in any danger if you kept having kids,” Remus told him, staring at James then glancing at Lily, who was looking at the table. “You abandoned one, but had more. Imagine how that feels for Harry.”
“We weren't in danger where we were,” James told him, looking at Remus. “We just couldn't come back until the signs were right.” Snorting, he added, “And the whole lot of you have now given the other side a huge advantage so they can prepare, as no one was supposed to know we're back.”
Seeing Severus and Remus, both, about to launch in, Stuart held up his hand, “We aren't going to go into that part. It doesn't relate to Harry and this area. It's something that, if you want to hash it out, you need to do so among yourselves later. We need to focus on the pressing issue with Harry.”
“Oh, I somehow feel it is related since, if they were willing to abandon their son and run off, it involves Harry in some way,” Severus sneered, but would allow the topic to be dropped.
Glowering at Snape, James ground his teeth. Oh, that was not an area they wanted to go into as it would just make matters worse. He knew the reason, of course, but even to him anymore it sounded lame when faced with what happened from their own actions. There was no way he could get across to anyone the urgency that was there all those years ago when they made the decision. As he didn't want to go into that and was just about at the end of what he could take, he did what always seemed to happen when he was in some similar situation; he lashed out. “Yeah, I get there are problems here, no doubt, but you lot aren't helping any of them from what we've seen and heard. It has to just be making it worse! So, don't try to preach to us about our mistakes when you're making plenty of your own!”
Seeing Severus and Remus, both, look to retort, Stuart asked, “Explain what you mean, James. And give examples. We'll work from there.”
Pleased to be off the uncomfortable topics and onto something he wanted to get out there, he snapped, “First? The relationship with Sirius and Harry. Bloody hell, Sirius is our age! Why in the hell you're letting the two be involved is beyond me! That's not right and can't be healthy! If Jamie even mentioned dating someone close to that age, we'd ground him until he was 17!”
Figuring that was a topic that would come at some point, Stuart felt it best for James hear it from one of Harry's fathers. Looking at Remus, who appeared angry, he said, gently, “Can you explain that to James, Remus? I could easily do so, but I think it's best he hear it from one of you as you made the choice to allow it.”
“Gladly,” Remus said, eyes locked on James. “First, Jamie is not Harry. You can't even begin to compare the two. Second, Harry isn't at all comfortable with people his own age. There is one he gets along with. That's all. And the only reason he has allowed that to continue is because he's Lucius' son. He's not remotely interested in anyone his own age. As mature as he is, he never will be either. Those his own age have no way to relate to someone like Harry or what he's been through, let alone be able to deal with the consequences of all he went through. Even those older can't. Then there is the trust issue. He just can't. He's not able to let many close because of that. Sirius he is. Severus and I have always been the parents. We've always taken on that role. Sirius agreed we were better at it as well, so let it go on, giving his consent as godfather when we adopted Harry. The romantic relationship came about for a different reason.”
“When Harry first came to live with us, it was bad, James. Worse than you could ever imagine. The trust was part. Behavior was another. You will never know how bad that was. Rules most kids and teens live under just didn't exist for him and never had because of his life. Then there was the fact that all Harry knew was sex. It's how he paid for everything. He tried with all of us for about a year to 'pay his way'. After he realized we would take care of him and wanted nothing in return, he tried because it was all he knew when it came to coping with what he was dealing with. Despite the fact that everyone in the world would see it as Harry being in a far better place and situation, Harry didn't know anything but what he lived through, and what he was dealing with was so far afield from that, he didn't know how to handle it. Sex was all he knew as a way to cope. Finally, we got him to lay off with most of us. He didn't with Sirius and Lucius, though. Lucius is—odd because of how Harry sees him. The first time he had consensual sex with anyone after being rescued was with Lucius. Before you say it, Narcissa knew and said nothing. We didn't either, understanding why. Sirius, though, he wouldn't let off with. It wasn't until I finally got him to talk about it that we realized the reason for that was that he was attracted to Sirius. Because of the life he lived, it was the only way he knew to express his interest.” Remus explained.
“I can safely say Sirius was blindsided, like all of us were. And he didn't know what to do. None of us did. We all talked it over then decided to allow Harry and Sirius to see where it led. However, the caveat was no sex was to be involved at first. That would define what relationship Harry wanted to have. Harry and Sirius agreed, so it pressed on.” Stopping, Remus shook his head then smiled a little before continuing, “Quickly, it became apparent that Harry wanted something well beyond just sex from Sirius. He adores Sirius and what they do together. They would both go out, have fun and do all kinds of things. The two of them enjoyed what they did and it benefited both of them in many ways. We were wary, of course, wondering, but we aren't anymore and they have our permission.” Giving a sad sigh, he said, “Harry is gay. He made that very clear from the start, something that causes him problems with many. Sirius has his own problems because of Azkaban. The two of them together help both of them in so many ways. They are great together and give each other what they both need, something I doubt they would ever find in someone else. They are wonderful for each other and help with the problems in so many ways. Harry now is more than willing to go out and be around others, especially females, because Sirius is always there with him. He knows Sirius won't let anyone try something foolish. Sirius loves being around Harry because Harry adores him in a way no one in the world ever has. The things they do together are strange, but they have fun. And Harry trusts Sirius is a way he doesn't anyone else in this world. They love each other, James. In the scheme of things, with all both of them went through, Severus and I don't see this as something wrong. Let them enjoy it. If you can't accept that, it's your failing, not our problem.”
Rolling his eyes, James shook his head. “Bloody hell. It's wrong!”
“Remus made several points, James,” Stuart told him softly. “You can't relate because you weren't there. The age factor in this case isn't something that is an issue. That has to do with how mature Harry is in this area. Your son may be mature and act his age, however, Harry is beyond him because he's only had himself to depend on for most of his life. He's far more mature in such areas than the majority of those his age because of the life he lived. It wouldn't be right to hem him into the same age bracket for dating. We won't even delve into the fact it's doubtful he would ever let anyone close in a way that would allow him to date. From my end, I understand why they've gone about it this way and take no issue. If I thought it was something that would cause harm, I would have clearly said so. It doesn't. In fact, it's helped in so many ways.” Gently, he added, “I don't see it as right to take away something that makes Harry so happy because of a number when it comes to age. That's what it boils down to. Sirius can handle Harry's problems better than almost anyone else in the world and knows just what he's dealing with. Anyone else probably couldn't unless they were close to the situation.”
“You're telling us you let this go on and don't see how wrong it is?” James said, looking between the three, ignoring Lily telling him to drop it.
“For most, the situation would be unhealthy, we all know this,” Stuart told him softly. “In this one, it's not. In fact, it's probably one of the healthiest relationships he's ever been in. Sirius wants nothing from Harry other than what Harry wants to give him. He makes sure Harry goes out, something he was reluctant to do, and they have fun. Harry adores Sirius in a very healthy way, as someone that is a best friend and beyond. It's all based not on sex, the only way Harry truly knew to express anything, but something else. The age issue isn't one anyone considers here.”
Slouching in his chair, arms folded over his chest, James glared around, but said nothing more as they, apparently, had plenty of arguments to counter whatever he said. Snarling, he asked, “Tell me how letting someone with so many damned problems go to a nightclub dressed in drag is helping anything! We saw that!”
“And just how do you know we did that,” Severus asked, glaring at him, tone deadly.
“We saw it, that's all you need to know,” James snapped, glowering at Snape.
Making a note to come back to that topic, Stuart asked, looking between Severus and Remus, “Is he referring to that contest they were entering? I assume that's what it is as I knew it was a fancy dress event.”
“It is,” Severus said with a firm nod. “Harry chose the costume he went in because it was nowhere near as revealing of what there was to choose from. On someone like Harry, even the leather ones wouldn't have been wise. This one was funny, we all admit that.” Glaring back at James, he hissed, “And it's not a nightclub for adults, Potter! It's meant for teens. There is no alcohol at all served, none. The minimum age to get in is 15. It's one of Harry's favorite places to go because of the music. We often, all of us, go there for lunch. There is nothing at all wrong with the place.”
“I believe one of you should explain the event,” Stuart said, looking between the two. “I know it was a fancy dress charitable one, but that's all.”
Quickly, Severus ran down what it was then added, “It was for a wonderful cause to raise money to help with many things. We saw nothing wrong with it. In fact, we encouraged it for many reasons. And that drag you were complaining about? Freddie Mercury dressed that way in the video as a parody of the Muggle soap opera Coronation Street.” Eyes flitting to Lily, who had a dawning comprehension on her face, he added, “Something Lily knows well as her mother adored the show.”
Quietly, looking between the other three, Lily said, “I didn't know Freddie Mercury died! I hadn't heard that.” Looking at James, who appeared bewildered, she explained, “He was with a band called Queen. They were wonderful. And he was quite flamboyant. Sev is right about that video. It's meant to be funny, James. That's all. He had a mustache while dressed that way. Trust me, Freddie made a horrible looking woman!” Looking back at the three, she asked, “All of you were dressed from the videos?”
“All of us,” Severus told her with a firm nod, then told them from what videos the costumes were from. “Harry wanted the CDs the winner would get, so he was trying to find something to help him win. He got them as Lucius won. We all had a great time. There were plenty in that club dressed far more outrageously than Harry was. I don't see how doing something silly like that to raise money to fight a horrible disease is wrong! For Merlin's sake, I had on a white satin suit! Remus wore a bunch of bananas on his head. Black was in a coat that belonged to Narcissa's mother. Lucius—there is no accurate way to describe that costume except to say outrageous. It was fun, Potter! Nothing more. Harry wouldn't dress in drag any other time. In fact, he spent the night grousing about how he was going to end up breaking his neck in the heels he had on and how the tights pulled the hair on his legs. This is not a normal event for him.”
Shaking his head, James just looked around, not sure what to say.
“Let me ask this, since you brought it up, James; are you following them? You mentioned seeing them at the club. As you've been away for so long, it's doubtful you knew where it was,” Stuart asked, looking at the man.
“We wanted to get a feel for just what was going on,” James snarled shortly but said no more.
“That's not wise, James. There is a restraining order in place. Following Harry isn't going to aid anything,” the Mind Healer counseled softly. “If you keep it up, I'm required to report that to the authorities.”
“It was just the one night,” James admitted looking down. “Look, we just wanted to understand what was going on so we knew what we were dealing with. We've been busy since then.”
“I would strongly suggest you not keep up that behavior,” Stuart told him firmly. “Not only is it illegal, you are going to help nothing by doing so, especially if Harry finds out.”
Sighing, Lily looked at the table, shaking her head. “Let me ask this; is it possible that Harry would like to meet his brother and sisters? Even if he won't us, is that something he’d be willing to do?”
“No,” Severus said firmly before Stuart could say anything. “First, he hates girls. I mean hates them. Before you ask, we have no idea why. The only thing we can figure out it might relate to is the fact that the person who 'owned' him before the one Lucius bought him from was a woman. We think, maybe, that's where it comes from. You do not want to expose your girls to Harry. At this point, we've managed to stop the worst of the names he calls them, but if he's stressed enough, he'll revert back to calling them a certain 'c' word.”
“Our guess on this, what with his behavior when he is forced to deal with females, is it comes from fear. We don't know where it comes from, as Severus said, but it's quite pronounced. He won't even deal with female shopkeepers to get clothing measurements, even with Severus, Remus and Sirius standing right there. It's a very bad idea to even ponder exposing him to your daughters as we can't judge his reaction. He's not violent, don't get me wrong, but what comes out of Harry's mouth when he's pushed is not something you ever want to explain to your other children, any of them,” Stuart told them firmly.
“Bloody hell! They are younger and smaller than he is! How is that threatening?” James asked, looking between the other three.
“Harry doesn't see it that way,” Remus told him firmly. “A girl is a girl to him. He wants nothing to do with any of them. Until we can figure out where this is coming from and how to deal with it, we keep all females away from him unless they are ones we know he can handle. It has taken Narcissa, someone that has a son the same age as him and wouldn't ever hurt him, from the night Lucius rescued Harry until now to get him to allow her to be alone with him. Even then, he's still wary. In this case, because they are your children and you dumped him, that might be more pronounced. We have no way of judging just what Harry's reaction might be to any of your kids. Until we can, they need to stay away.” Lowering his voice, Remus then bit out, “And they are not his brother and sisters. Harry is not your child. He will never see them as such. Remember that, James.”
Snarling at that, James looked around, then snapped, “Why don't you ask him? To where we can hear you?”
“Fine, we'll do that,” Severus said, looking smug. “When Rufus fulfills his promise to Harry, we'll make damned sure he's asked right in front of you. Then you can hear it for yourself. However, keep in mind, the more you push to do this, the more he's going to balk. It's his choice, Potter, not yours. We'll abide by what he wants in this area.”
“What is it Rufus promised him?” James asked warily.
“To make you sit down and listen to what Harry has to say to you about what he had to live through and how he feels about it,” Remus told him, looking at his old friend. “You know Rufus, James. He will. It's something he promised Harry. And Harry is looking forward to it. That's all he wants from you, nothing more. In fact, he plainly told me that if he thought that it would keep you out of his life forever and he would never have to see you again, he would forgo that.”
“Son of a--,” James said, shaking his head and scrubbing a hand through his hair. He didn't know how to react to that or answer it.
“James, this is a situation you made,” Stuart said softly. “Harry has the right to feel this way. It's even more pronounced when you factor in that you left him here and ran off only to have more children. How do you think that makes Harry feel? He's not going to feel that you love him. It just adds to how pronounced the feeling of abandonment is. I know he clung to the idea that he had parents that loved him enough to make the ultimate sacrifice for him when he found out what happened. However, that was a lie, something that caused a backlash of epic proportions. That's where Harry is with the situation. And you have no one to blame but yourselves for it.”
Seeing Potter look like he was going to explode, a glare firmly in place, Snape leaned forward and clasped his hands on the table. “I have a proposal here.” Seeing nods, he said, “One of the things we were told was you want to get into one of the properties that was willed to Harry to live there.”
“We need something for the family, yes. It was our thought that we could talk Harry into letting us stay in one,” James said, wondering where this was going.
“I'll propose this; I'm sure Remus and I can talk him into giving you one of them. We'll make sure it's big enough that it's comfortable for you. You're not getting any of the money left to him. That's in the hands of our solicitor to handle from this point forward. From what he said there is no chance you're getting it back. However, we can talk Harry into the property if you sign a binding document to exit his life forever unless he makes overtures to let you back in.” Stopping, he waited.
Looking at his husband, Remus thought that over then gave a slow nod. He hadn't thought of that, but it could work.
“No,” James said firmly, shaking his head. “We deserve a chance! I'm not agreeing to this. I don't give a damn about a house. We want Harry in our lives!”
“The chance for you to have that is still there, James,” Stuart said softly. “It will be completely his choice to do that though.” He hadn't heard of this before and was wary, but it did sound fair to him.
“No!” James snarled. “We aren't making a deal like this.”
“Then we are right back where we started,” Severus told him, leaning back, drumming his fingers on the table. Shaking his head, he said, “Potter, we aren't forcing him to talk to you. He's said no and we know his reasons for it. And if you persist, he's going to never change that stance.”
“You don't get this!” James exploded, snarling and shouting. “We love Harry. We always have. We did our damnedest to protect him from the hell that is coming while trying to save ourselves. This—it isn't something we could have dreamed would happen! And he's still in danger, more than you'll ever know. In doing what we did, it's to help him. That snake-faced bastard isn't gone. He didn't die that night like so many said he did. And he's back. That's why we're back. We deserve a chance to get to know our son and talk to him. Then we can help protect him. If you don't allow us that chance, we can't do that! Then you're putting him in more danger than before.”
“To protect him, he would have to trust you,” Remus said softly, staring at James. “He can't and won't, James. You've blown that completely.”
“That's why you need to do something to allow us to prove he can,” James shot right back.
“There is nothing we can do to help you do that,” Remus told him firmly. “You've proven to us by all of this we can't trust you. If you're willing to pull this kind of thing, who knows what you'll do in the future.” Remus told him firmly.
“This is bullshite!” James snarled, looking around. “You don't know what you're doing in not stepping up and helping us!”
“We know he's back,” Severus told him bluntly, glaring at the man. “We've seen the signs as well. We also know about the Horcruxes. We've found several and destroyed them. Lucius was in that awful place that night to get one from someone that stole it from Bella's vault, Potter. Don't tell us we don't know what's going on! All we're doing is keeping a very troubled young man out of the mess. We'll handle whatever is thrown our way, not Harry. We'll protect him to the best of our ability. You, he doesn't need. Albus, he doesn't need. Anyone that pulls these stunts, I don't give a damn the reason behind them, is someone we don't need. Trust me there. There are enough of us around to protect Harry from whatever the Dark Lord may be planning. You worry about your own kids, don't worry about Harry. The Dark Lord would have to get through plenty of us to get to him. That includes many in the Ministry itself.”
“You don't know what's truly going on,” James said softly, shaking his head.
“And I'm not going to believe anything that comes out of your or Albus' mouth on the topic,” Severus shot right back, eyes locked on Potter. “Anyone that would pull this kind of stunt isn't to be believed.”
Head dropping back, eyes sliding shut, James groaned. He didn't know what to say here. And it wasn't helping his temper one damned bit.
Reaching out and taking her husband's hand, Lily sighed and looked across the table at the two there. “How about this; let James and I write a letter of apology to Harry and Sirius, both. They deserve that from us. If we do that, can you at least see that they get it? I won't ask you to pressure Harry to read it, I would just like him to know we sent it.”
“I don't see that as a bad option,” Stuart said, looking at Severus and Remus. “It's a step in the right direction anyway.”
Thinking it over, glancing at Severus, who was looking at him, Remus gave a slow nod. “We'll do that. However, we'll read Harry's first before we give it to him to make sure there is nothing upsetting in it. If there is, we're sending it back. Do not mention trying to fix this either. Leave any reference to that out. And there are no guarantees he's going to read it. In fact, I doubt he will.”
“We'll come up with something when we get home,” Lily sighed. “Can we get some pictures of him?”
“No,” Severus said firmly, glaring at her. “We don't have many anyway, but, even if we did, you wouldn't get them. That's not within your rights to have.”
Nodding, Lily looked down, slumping slightly. She had hoped, but wasn't surprised the answer was no. “Can we, please, do this once a month to know how he's doing? And to try to work with what's here? I just want to know.”
“I think that may be a good option. However, persisting in the line of thinking it's going to lead to a reconciliation won't aid anything,” Stuart said softly, looking between James and Lily. “That's not in the offing. In this case, the final say-so for that comes from Severus, Remus and Harry. All of them are saying no. You need to respect that like you would from anyone else.”
“We'll think about it,” Remus said softly, looking between the two. “Because, honestly, I don't see where it would do any good. You have no rights when it comes to anything dealing with Harry. Why you think you need kept up on how he's doing is beyond me.”
“I agree with Remus, completely,” Severus said firmly, crossing his arms over his chest. “We'll consider it, that's all. Nothing more.” Looking around, knowing this was probably close to an end, though nothing, nowhere, was solved and he doubted Potter was going to back off, he said, “I want to make something clear here, especially to you, Potter.” Seeing nods, he pressed on, “If you persist in this and voice even part of what you did here to Harry, you can expect him to defend himself. He does not and will not put up with your attitude, you telling him what to do, you demanding something, anything like that. He's made that clear to us, though he didn't have to. And if he feels threatened, he'll defend himself. Harry knows plenty of spells, we've taught them to him so he can defend himself and not use Muggle weaponry to do it, something he was known for at the beginning. However, if someone pulls that stunt with him, he's not going to defend himself with his wand. Harry will defend himself with his fists. And he's well versed in how to do that. He didn't come out of the situation he was in alive for no reason. Plenty of others he knew over the years didn't, something he will tell you plainly. Keep that in mind before you even think to pull something foolish with him. And we will not step in if you start with him unless it looks like violence is in the offing. Harry is allowed to defend himself and tell you he's not going to put up with something. That is his right. Keep that in mind before you think to attempt anything with him. He is not like a normal teenager, Potter. He's not going to take anything from anyone. We accept that. You need to as well.”
Looking at Snape, James shook his head, not sure what to say to that.
“That is something you need to keep in mind,” Stuart said softly, looking at the two. “Harry is very vocal when he is annoyed or feels threatened. And he's allowed to be. It's something you need to heed when he says something along those lines. There is nothing wrong with it either as he tells you plainly what you're doing to set him off. That's something we all encourage.” Glancing at the time, he sighed, “The hour is up. I think we need to adjourn. I would suggest one more session like this before you decide on something else. James and Lily, you both need to think about what was said here and formulate questions for that. We'll give it a couple of weeks then set up another session. That should be all it'll take. Everyone agreeable?” He asked, looking around. Seeing nods, he said, “We'll adjourn then. I'll get with Severus and Remus to set up a time that's best for them around their schedules as they have plenty on their plates. We'll then go from there.”

Waiting until Lily and James had left, Remus sighed then looked at Severus before glancing at Stuart and said, “I doubt that did any good. They are not going to back off because they just don't get how bad this is.”
“It's my hope that we got them thinking,” Stuart said, leaning back in his chair. “The seed is planted. The next session we're going to press forward more and lay out many other areas. I think that's all we can accomplish. Until they truly accept what is wrong, their part in it and how the roles in this are not what they want, nothing is going to change. James is going to lash out, just as he did with both of you, and not accept responsibility because to do that means he has to accept that this might not be fixable. The only real thing I hope to accomplish here is to keep them away from Harry. That is all. He has enough to deal with when it comes to this mess that them trying with him is not what he needs. If that's all we accomplish, I consider it a mark in the win column.”
Thinking that over, Severus gave a bare nod. “We can handle ourselves with them. Let them come at us. The same with Black. Let's just work on keeping the foolishness with Harry to a minimum.”
“It may take some compromise on both your ends, but I think we can manage it,” Stuart said softly. “However, we're going to make it clear that there is no bend in anything when it comes to seeing Harry. I'm even worried about what that session Rufus plans with Harry may set off. James—the attitude is one that concerns me. I'm not sure we can make him understand that Harry and his son Jamie are not even on the same continent when it comes to being close in anything but age. Let's see what presents itself and go from there. We laid the foundation for what we need. Now we press on. It's a good start, keep that in mind. Beyond that, go with the measures we set in place and keep doing what you are. As always, any problems at all, contact me and I'll help all I can.” Seeing nods, he gathered his papers together and said, “Until our next session, gentleman, keep up the good work.” With a nod, the two then stood to let themselves out.
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Lucky Strike