Adult-FanFiction.org : Harry Potter

Coming Home	By : SpeedyTomato Category: Harry Potter > Threesomes/Moresomes Views: 45644 -:- Recommendations : 8 -:- Currently Reading : 16
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter and make no money off this story.

Chapter List
- 9
- 10
- 11
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With help from Lynn who works with me when it comes to flow, continuity and other issues.

Chapter 9

By the time Remus, Sirius and Harry actually made it inside the Burrow then were seated at the table, Harry had been almost squeezed to death, cried on, had his back clapped so many times it should be bruised and was generally fawned over because of how much he had changed. While Harry smiled at all of it, happy to see his old friends and those Weasleys he knew, it was already slightly daunting to deal with. The questions were already starting, of course, but Molly made sure everyone stopped to let them settle in and relax.
Once seated together then the tea was poured, Sirius held up his hand and said, before anyone could start, “As we told Arthur and Molly when we were invited; Harry has a phone date with his 'girlfriends'. This was planned before the invite and he promised them he would be available. So, he'll end up distracted by plenty. We don't want to seem rude or to take away from the gathering, but it was already something he promised his friends. I just want it out there so no one ends up offended.”
“We've made it clear to everyone,” Arthur told Sirius with a smile, already glancing at the complicated phone Harry placed on the table in front of him. “Besides, it'll be fascinating to see what you can do with your phone. It's so much more complicated than the one I have or even Sirius'.”
Ron was seated across from his old friend, eyes wide at what Harry now looked like. Honestly, he wasn't sure what to expect from Harry all these years later, but he assumed it was like just a taller, slightly more adult looking man who was the spitting image of his friend from all those years ago. However, what he saw was completely different. While Harry still looked like the kid he remembered from school, he had changed, a lot. Not only was he far taller than he imagined Harry would ever be, but quite fit looking, hair no longer sticking up all over, scar not there, glasses gone, dressed in what he could tell were expensive clothes and just—he didn't know what to call it, but looking like so many he saw at work that worried about how they dressed to look their best. The Harry he remembered didn't really care about how he looked or dressed. It was so different he didn't know what to make of it.
After Sirius mentioned the call, he honed in on the 'girlfriends' bit then his eyes widened further. “You have more than one girlfriend?” He asked, not sure what to make of that bit. He assumed Harry would have someone by now, as it was the case with most he knew, even Neville, but this sounded like more than one to him. While there was plenty he wanted to ask, and would, this was as good of a place as any to start.
“Sirius and Remus just call them my girlfriends,” Harry chuckled, grinning a tad. Then, with a shake of his head, he added, “They're my best friends, ones I met in the States. It just so happens they are all girls, nothing more. It's not a romantic or dating thing, I swear.”
“No, nothing like that,” Remus assured everyone with a smile. “Though Harry does go on 'dates' with them. All at once as well! He went to two separate proms and another dance last spring with about three dates, or more, for each one. His 'girlfriends' decided they wanted him along more than finding a real date.” What he didn't add was the girls took Harry because they weren't interested in guys. No one in their right mind was apt to give the girls a hard time with Harry around. Most in the schools they went to had met Harry and knew he wouldn't put up with the bigoted nonsense so many tried with his friends. This was a good way to keep everyone off topics he knew was coming, hopefully. Besides, Harry liked talking about his friends.
After hearing people ask, Sirius grinned then added, “He did! Trust me! We have the pictures to prove it. Harry all totted up in formal robes with girls hanging off of him. Even rode to them in a stretch limo. Was a riot to see. I think his girlfriends spent as much time getting him ready as they did themselves. Remus and I were laughing ourselves silly watching.” Then, nudging Harry, he said, “Show them a picture of all of you.”
Happy to have something to do that didn’t involve answering the multitude of questions he knew were coming, Harry quickly scrolled through the pictures of him and his friends on his phone until he found one of all of them standing in front of the pool at their house in California which Remus had taken. While they were dressed normally, all of them were in shorts and standard summer attire. Pulling at the phone to enlarge it to its maximum size, he turned it around so everyone could see. The girls were all beautiful, though each in their own way, looking different when it came to so much.
“Wow!” Was all Charlie could say as he stared at the picture Harry showed, watching him and all the girls waving at everyone, appearing like they were giggling, well, the girls anyway. While he hadn't met Harry before today, he heard enough about him over the years that who he was meeting didn't sound like the same person. It was odd, but he would go with it. He then grinned and said, “Those are some beautiful girlfriends, Harry. If they ever come over, you might have to introduce me to them.”
“They're great,” Harry told him with grin then pointed out who was who to everyone, telling them their names. When he pointed to the tall blond girl clinging to him in the picture, head resting on his shoulder, he said, with a smile, “That's Marissa. She's Plato's daughter and probably my best friend in the world. She 'claimed' me at the beach one day when someone was picking on her and I told them off. Since then, we've been close.”
While he was slightly jealous hearing someone else was now Harry's best friend since he had thought about himself and Hermione that way for so long, Ron grinned. “She's a beautiful bird, Harry.”
“She is,” Harry nodded with a smile, scrolling through the pics on the phone then showing everyone some of them, including ones of him with his surfboard and the girls in their normal beachwear. “She's a riot.”
“She is,” Sirius admitted with a chuckle, hoping to stay on this topic for a while to hold off the ones he knew were coming. “You just need to get used to her, something that takes a bit of time.”
“She 'claimed' you?” Hermione asked, staring at the pictures of the beautiful women and Harry. She wasn’t sure what to make of all this. While she was more level headed than Ron and assumed Harry had changed, part of her also thought the friendship would pick right back up after being around each other again. Harry, though, had changed, a lot from what she could tell and she wasn't sure if it would happen now.
“Oh, that was hilarious,” Remus snorted, shaking his head and smiling. Then he went on to relay the tale of how it came about.
“Harry basically told the great bullying git off when he saw him picking on Marissa. We were on a Magical beach, so everyone there was either a witch or wizard. Of course, they had their wands. Harry, though, seemed to have cut an intimidating enough presence before Sirius and I were getting ready to help that the fool backed off then left. Marissa thanked him, of course, and they were talking. Sirius and I left them alone, but were keeping watch to make sure nothing happened or in case the fool returned for revenge with others. Next thing we knew, Marissa was calling over to Plato, who was down the beach a ways, and said 'I'm keeping him, Daddy'. Plato, who was on the phone, just told her that was fine and waved to them. The look on Harry's face was priceless, let me tell you.”
“I had no clue what she meant by that,” Harry laughed, shaking his head as he remembered the incident. At the time, he wondered if it meant something romantic or about a crush of some kind. As would be expected, he was concerned about telling her he was gay and bonded with two people because of the attitude of so many in the States about same sex partnerships. Thankfully, it was something he didn't have to worry about.
Sirius then picked up where Remus stopped, shoulders shaking as he grinned. “Next thing we know, she's dragging poor stammering Harry down the beach to meet her father. He was stuttering the whole way, too! Remus and I weren't sure what in Merlin's name was going on and planned to rescue him from whatever. Turns out, it was just her way of saying he was now her friend, nothing more. They exchanged phone numbers and planned to get to know each other since we didn't live far from them. Then they spent the rest of the afternoon talking.”
“The next day, Harry received a package from her. It was a mobile phone. None of us had those as we didn't think they were needed. This was Marissa's way of telling him she liked him. After that, they've been inseparable.” Sirius finished, smiling at the memory of Harry finally finding his true friends after so long.
“And having his phone seemingly affixed to himself as though there is a charm on it,” Remus added with a soft amused snort. “All the time. The girls are of the kind we saw in the States that take the phone everywhere with them and are always on it unless they're together. If they aren't together physically, they're seemingly on the phones with each other. Even Harry.”
“It was really strange at first,” Harry admitted with a shake of his head. “Wasn't used to it. Even stranger was all the girls around all the time. Those weren’t something I was used to either.” Before anyone could ask, as it looked like a couple were, he added, “I was tossed into the middle of a whole gaggle of girls with me being the only guy. They were friends for years when I came along. It was enough to make you stammer, trust me! Especially with some of what they did.”
“Harry, I need that kind of luck with birds,” Bill laughed, shaking his head. He hadn't met Harry either, though he had heard plenty about him, so this was odd, but he was going with it. To him, it sounded like Harry was plenty happy, all that really counted.
With a sheepish grin, Harry just shrugged. He was then saved from too many more questions by Molly levitating food onto the table. While it would give him a break, he doubted it would be long before the questions started. All he hoped was their plan worked and he wouldn't end up drawn in too much because he would be on the phone.

By the time the food was dished up and everyone started eating, the real questions began.
Hermione kicked it off by asking, “Were you in California the whole time?” She hoped she could segue from there to find out information on just what happened. No one knew, so they were all curious how Harry vanished and where he had been all these years.
“No,” Harry told her, leaving it right there. He sure wasn't getting into what happened as he was sure everyone at the table would end up plenty upset to hear what really happened.
“We've been there the last couple of years,” Sirius told them, though not explaining beyond that. “And are going back when we finish here.” It was his hope the last part would draw everyone's attention enough to get them off track. If not, they'd find another way.
“You're not staying then?” Arthur asked, brow furrowed. “I assumed you would, what with setting everything up you need to then running it.”
“No,” Sirius shook his head. “We're only here to set it all up and get it running. Once it's in place, we'll have people tend to it for us. They're better at running a business than I am, having far more experience. We're just the majority partners in the whole venture with Plato, nothing more.”
“Do you have any idea how long it'll take to get it running?” Arthur then asked. While he was curious for the end dealing with the Ministry, he wanted to know how long they would be around for a multitude of other reasons.
“A couple of years or less,” Sirius told him with a sigh. “We're pushing it as fast as we can for plenty of reasons, not the least of which is we know the phones are needed.”
“Oh, they are,” Molly chimed in for the first time. “They can do a world of good with the nightmare going on.” While she wanted to know so much, like what happened, she also knew what a boon those phones could be for so many areas.
“Something we know as well,” Remus agreed with a nod. “So, everyone is trying as fast as they can, hence the reason they are routing the calls through the continent until they get what is needed set up here. If we had to wait to get everything in place, it would take months, no matter how fast they pushed it.”
Arthur figured this was as good a place as any to jump in with a major question they had, one that would help plenty. “I do have to ask, and we aren't looking for favors if you can't or don't feel you want to; is there any chance of those of us in the Order can get the phones early? As you know what's going on, you probably realize we desperately need a better form of communication.”
The three of them and Plato honestly expected some who found out the phones would be available to ask for a chance to get them early. Some they were actually planning on doing it for, such as those in the Ministry, giving them a discount because of the need. So, he could deal with this. With a nod, he said, “We can manage. It won't be by much, but the store will open in two weeks. Once we get the shipments and have them programmed for what we need, I'll let you know when someone can pick them up. It should be next week some time. Keep in mind, these won't be as good as ones we get later on because of the distance we'll have to route the calls through and you won't be able to get ones as advanced as Harry's yet. They'll be like mine.”
“We've worked it out so those in the Ministry will get a discount. Any members of the DMLE will get a bigger discount,” Remus jumped in, knowing this had been decided long ago. “You might want to get those with such jobs to buy them so you get not only a bigger discount on the phone, but a better rate on the plans.”
“Oh, we will,” Arthur nodded, pleased with what they said. There were enough in the Order attached to the DMLE they would manage.
“How expensive will it be to get the phones? My parents have them and the price is dropping. I know other countries are cheaper with them,” Hermione asked, figuring the cost would be a major factor in who could afford what.
“I'll be honest in these will be expensive, the same with the contracts,” Sirius told her. Then, with a shrug, he added, “You need to realize we are working from scratch on installing everything we need. Unlike the States and some other countries, we can't piggyback our technology with what Muggles have set up. So, this is going to cost plenty to set up. That's passed along to the consumers. I'll also add it would be even more if we didn't do what we are and routing it through the continent at first. We at least have a backup that will help minimize the costs. If you wait, the price will drop, as it does with everything.”
“Is there something in place to hold off those we don't want getting them? Like Death Eaters?” Bill asked, wondering if they could manage, though he wasn't sure how.
“We're going to try,” Sirius said. Then, with a heavy sigh, he admitted, “We have no way to turn them down without being slapped with a lawsuit for discrimination. Of course, we'll have up the standard right to refuse service signs, but they'll get their hands on them. All we can manage is to make it as hard on them as we possibly can. If we refuse them, they just have to go through the continent to get some and route their calls that way. Trust me, if there was a way to deny them and make it stick, we would have found it. Plato is fairly neutral in this mess, as least so far, but even he says he wants his phones to stay out of their hands if we can at all manage. Give us time to see what we can do.”
“Have you heard anything about the landlines and what the Ministry wants to do with regulating one or the other as a public utility?” Arthur asked, curious. Those bits were out of his hands, so he didn't always hear.
“We have,” Sirius nodded, pleased they were staying off the more uncomfortable topics. “They're going with the landlines for the public utility because they are far more stable and reliable. We've already signed the paperwork for that part of this. It's just going to take us longer to get it into place, something they're well aware of. While we've bought what we need already, we're starting completely from scratch and can't piggyback onto what Muggles have, so it's going to take some months to get it up. The Ministry will get them first, something they're actually starting on next week . After that, it'll be in the big areas, like London, then we'll branch out. We're setting up for strictly Magical areas, like Hogsmeade, first so they have something. Our thought was Hogsmeade needs done first because of Hogwarts. Anything to help protect the castle with all that's going on needs to take priority.”
“I don't think any of us would have thought of Hogwarts in this,” Molly admitted with a nod. “Is the castle going to get service? I think it's needed.”
“Oh yes,” Sirius nodded. “It'll be a priority. We just need the Ministry to finish whatever it's doing with the Hogwarts board to know how we're going about it. And to see how fast they want it in. If they want, we'll start on it before we do London and Hogsmeade. It's up to them, though.”
“How confusing is the Ministry going to make this?” Charlie asked, highly curious. He knew what they were like, despite doing all they could with the mess going on. From what he knew, red tape would probably come into play as well.
With a snort, Sirius shook his head then sighed, “I don't know. It'll be complicated. Some of it comes down to how little they know about what we can do and is viable. We're going to have to wait and see on this. Some is standard, like wiring the Ministry. We made sure to include the template of what most countries do for this. It's our hope they follow those examples as they work best rather than something off the wall.” He then explained the basics of what they thought everyone should have as he knew most there didn't understand what he meant.
By this point, everyone had finished eating, so Molly cleared the table and served up dessert. After taking a seat and waiting for the conversation about the phones to wane, she then changed topics to the more personal areas.
After a smile at Harry, she said, “We've been so worried about you over the years, wondering what happened.” While it wasn't a direct question, she would use it to jump off with.
“I was fine,” Harry told her with a smile, refusing to take the bait. A surreptitious glance at his phone had him relieved as it was very close to the time Marissa would call, something that would throw the conversation completely off, or so they hoped.
“You look so good!” She said with a smile. “Definitely changed.”
“I was well taken care of,” he told her, not going any further though he did want to mention that he was fed well, given nutrient potions to counteract all the damage done from living with the Dursleys and all sorts of other bits.
“Where were you?” She asked. “Well, we heard Sirius was looking for you, of course, but that's all.”
With a chuckle, Harry told her truthfully, “All over the place. Was a great adventure, actually.”
Molly was about to press on to more specific questions of what happened then ask about the name change, but she was startled to the point of about jumping out of her chair when Harry's phone rang.
Harry was relieved when the ringtone of Marissa's voice called to him, signaling the call. After quickly picking it up and answering, he thought this was probably the best distraction from the questions there was. “Hey, Marissa,” he said. For the moment, he didn't have it on speakerphone, so no one could hear but him.
“Right on time,” Sirius snorted, shaking his head and looking amused. When he saw the odd looks and everyone staring at Harry, he said, “That's Harry's ringtone for Marissa. She made one up for him using her voice.”
“It certainly gets your attention,” Hermione said, eyes wide. She really wasn't sure what to make of that phone. It wasn't anything like the mobiles she'd seen. From her end, despite being warned that the call was coming, she was off-put by Harry focusing on the call. It was her assumption he would want to reconnect enough he would ignore it or cut it short. He didn't look like he was going to do either, though.
With a chuckle, Sirius gave Harry a nudge then said, “Put it on speakerphone so she can say hi to everyone. After that, we need to figure out what she's having you do so we can plan accordingly.”
“I will,” Harry nodded, filling Marissa in on what was going on. With a grin, he looked around as he pulled the phone away from his ear and said, “She wants a picture of everyone. Do you mind?”
“No, not at all,” Arthur smiled, pleased to see more of how things worked with his phone and what it could do. He had played with his own, of course, but still was lost with so much of it.
After quickly snapping the picture of all the Weasleys and Hermione, making sure they crowded together so he could fit all of them in, he sent it to Marissa then turned on the speakerphone function. “The picture is of everyone. When you get it, I'll point out who Ron and Hermione are. I told you about them, remember? My best friends at Hogwarts. And say 'hi'. Everyone can hear you.”
“Oh, good!” Marissa squealed in delight. “We've heard so much about them, it'll be wonderful to finally put a face with the name.” Then she switched topics and said, “Hello, everyone!”
Ron took in the posh accent combined with a slightly snooty voice and didn't know what to think. He then looked at Hermione, seeing the same kind of expression there. This was—he wasn't all that sure what to make of it.
“What are you planning for Harry today?” Sirius asked Marissa, grinning as he did since he knew what was coming.
“I'm still not talking to you, Sirius the meany!” Marissa huffed. “Not until you bring our Harry back to us.”
Shoulders shaking as he grinned, Sirius told her, “Your dad said he'd be over here in a month to check on how it's going and he'll bring you with him. You'll manage until then.”
“It's not the same,” Marissa whined. “We need our Harry, Sirius! And you took him away from us.”
“I love you too, Marissa,” Sirius snorted, shaking his head and still grinning.
Seeing stunned looks around the table at what was said, assuming most just didn't expect someone to talk to an adult this way, Remus chuckled then told them, “You'll get used to it. As Sirius said; it takes some time.”
When everyone nodded, though still looking slightly stunned and unsure, Remus asked Marissa, “What do you need Harry for? From the sound of it, this is a rather drawn out phone date.”
“How you and Harry put up with Sirius I will never understand, Remus,” Marissa huffed. Then she explained, “We need to pick out swimsuits for the season. It's always Harry's job to help us, you know. And we're having a slumber party tomorrow, so we need new lingerie for it. And we'll need to go out to get some sweets because we'll be so upset Harry isn't with us to help like he always has been. And I'll have you know, Sirius, it'll be the first slumber party since we met Harry he's not been with us, so there will be lots of tears. To make up for the sadness, we'll need to eat lots of fattening foods! If we gain weight from the sadness, it'll be all your fault, Sirius the meany!”
Unable to help himself, Sirius laughed at what was said. Like most areas dealing with Marissa, and what she said, he didn't take it at all seriously. It was just her overly dramatic way of saying she missed her friend, nothing more. “You'll manage, Marissa. I doubt any of you will get fat. Harry will be around, just like we promised. He just can't be there in person. Take all the time you need and he'll help just like normal.”
“It's not the same,” she pouted, whining a little more. “We'll manage, but it's better if he's here in person. It just means we'll have to do a video call so he can help us pick everything out and check it over as we try them on.”
“I'll help all I can,” Harry told her with a grin.
“Mate, you're helping girls that look that good pick out swimsuits?” George asked, eyes wide.
“And undies?” Fred added, eyes also wide, grinning as he did.
“Though a phone call and live?” They then inquired together, both wondering if they could get a gander in the guise of helping.
“Yeah,” Harry told them with a chuckle. “This is part of my job. I make sure it looks all right and fits fine. Some of the fashions out there don’t look that good. As they want to look their best, I get to help.”
“Harry has the best fashion sense,” Marissa bragged, sounding smug. “He always helps us.”
“I think, from the look on the faces of a couple of the men around the table here, they would be more than happy to help as well,” Remus chuckled, seeing several big grins and nods of agreement at what he said.
“Nope, only Harry,” Marissa told him, sounding determined. “We trust him.”
“I'll do all I can,” Harry promised with a grin at the look of enthusiasm from several of the Weasley brothers. “While you pick out your suits, I'll have you grab a couple for me. Not sure what they have over here, so it's best you send them.”
“We'll get you something nice.” Marissa assured him. “Let me talk to you alone for a minute then we'll hang up and I'll call back when we get to the mall.”
With a nod, Harry turned the speaker off and put the phone to his ear. He assumed she wanted to talk to him about something personal before she left to pick everyone up.
“I'm—well, she sounds different than anyone we've ever encountered,” Molly sputtered, not sure what to make of the young lady.
“You'll get used to her,” Sirius chuckled, shaking his head. Then, quietly, so Marissa didn't overhear, though he doubted she could with her being on the phone, he added, “Don't take some of what she says seriously. It's for show and self preservation. She has to deal with plenty that would be comparable to the Pureblood circles here in the UK. You know what they're like and how cutthroat it can get. What she deals with might even be worse. She's actually quite sweet. What she says to me is a joke, nothing more. It's gone on like this forever.”
“We were wondering, Sirius,” Arthur chuckled, shaking his head. “I do understand the States are more relaxed in some areas, but I assumed they taught their children manners and not to speak to adults in such a way.”
“Marissa is quite well mannered,” Remus assured him with a smile. “So are the other girls. It's just their way of handling what they deal with, nothing more.” He wasn't going to explain some of it, such as them being lesbians as he wasn't sure how some at the table would take the revelation.
After hanging up, Harry said, “They'll call back shortly, once she picks everyone up and they get to the mall.”
“This should be interesting,” Sirius grinned at Harry. “And, to be helpful, Remus and I will assist all we can in making sure everything looks good on them.” Unlike Harry, he and Remus were bisexual, something Harry and the girls knew, so Harry would get the joke.
“And if you suggest that, she'll never stop calling you a pervert.” Harry laughed, shaking his head. “Remus might even end up tagged with it then. He's managed to escape that label because of his panicked running away the first time they were over using the pool.”
“Panicked run?” Bill asked, shoulders shaking at what he was hearing. “Oh, tell us! This sounds good.”
“You have no idea,” Remus said, shaking his head and smiling. “It was the first time the whole gaggle of girls came over. We have a pool at the house for privacy when you don't want to brave the beach on busy days or when it’s raining,” he started to explain, chuckling as he did.
Sirius then picked up the story from there, “Harry hadn't known the girls long, but it was a day they didn't want to go to the beach, so he invited them over, something we didn't mind. Neither of us were prepared for what came, trust me.”
“Remus likes to sit outside and read while soaking up the sun. It's quite nice and you don't bake as badly as when you're on the sand. So, he was out in his favorite chair in only shorts. I had just done some laps in the pool and was laying on one of the lounge chairs. We were expecting the girls, of course, but weren't quite prepared for what happened.”
“It seemed that, all of a sudden and out of the blue, the pool area was filled with teenage girls in skimpy swimwear. And I mean plenty skimpy. Here we are, two older men, sitting there surrounded by—well, you saw what they look like. All I could do was stammer. Remus, though, just picked up his book and ran.”
“I felt rather anxious at being out there in just shorts as I didn't know the girls,” Remus admitted sheepishly, chuckling slightly. “It was rather blindsiding to be caught like that.”
“I believe I would have had the same reaction,” Arthur chuckled, shaking his head, hearing the rest laugh at the story.
“They thought it was really sweet,” Harry laughed. “It's something everyone where we lived was used to since most have pools. We just weren't yet.”
“Yes, well, I’m not sitting outside in just shorts with a bunch of semi-naked female teenagers,” Remus said, smiling as he did, shoulders shaking a tad. “I think most of us would be too self-conscious for such a venture.”
“I would be,” Arthur admitted, his own shoulders shaking as he grinned.
“So, from then on out, when they showed up to use the pool, Remus vanished, hiding inside.” Sirius grinned, reaching over to give Remus a playful shove.
“And you tend to join me, Sirius,” Remus added with a chuckle. “We spend the day, no matter how nice, hiding inside.”
Remus was actually pleased with this. So far no one had been able to ask the questions none of them wanted to answer because of the distractions they were tossing out there. He doubted it would go on forever, but it was helping. If it worked, they would keep going.
“It's called self preservation,” Sirius chuckled. “The same with the slumber parties. Learned my lesson with the first one and we spend those nights hiding in the bedroom.”
“Wait, wait, wait!” Bill said, holding up his hand, grinning from ear to ear. “As in co-ed slumber parties? Were you the only guy there as well, Harry? It sounds like you're the only male around them.”
“I'm officially tagged as one of the girls,” Harry admitted with a chuckle and shake of his head. “And I'm the only male in the group.”
“They're co-ed, trust me,” Sirius laughed, seeing grins from most of the young men at the thought. “The first one had us wondering what in Merlin's name they were planning, but Harry told us it was just the standard of mucking around and whatever. He's 'required' to attend all of them now. As they rotate whose house they'll be at, we get to host them once in a while. Nothing like being overrun with girls in skimpy lingerie all bloody night.”
“Sirius and I decided with the first one to just let them have at it and hide in the bedroom all night,” Remus told everyone with a smile. “They won't do anything to get in trouble, of course, just have fun. Since we have the telly and other entertainments, we kept to ourselves.”
“And he means hide, too,” Harry added, grinning evilly then laughing when Sirius elbowed him because Sirius knew what he was referring to. “It was your own fault, you know!” He added, looking at Sirius.
“That was—I think it gave me nightmares and made me self conscious for months, Harry,” Sirius snorted, shaking his head.
“What happened?” Charlie asked, figuring this would be a riot.
“After tea that night, Sirius and I retired to the bedroom, letting the teenagers have the run of the house. They were already talking about what they were planning, bits like gossiping, hair, skin cleansing and the like, nothing horrible. Anyway, Sirius and I were watching movies.” This is where Remus stopped to explain the telly for their kind and such, bits they didn't have in the UK. When everyone seemed to understand, he pressed on again.
“About eleven that night, it was all quiet, so we assumed they were in the room they were using for all of them that night doing whatever,” Remus pressed on, already starting to smile. “I'll be honest, being confined to the room for that amount of time was making us slightly barmy as we were used to doing whatever. Anyway, Sirius was getting antsy and decided to go grab us both something to drink to get out of the room. Well, he poked his head out and didn't see anyone. We could hear the telly from the room they were in, so we assumed it was safe.”
“It wasn't, as I learned the hard way,” Sirius groaned, rubbing a hand over his face and shaking his head.
“Mind you, I have the information second hand, so what I heard comes from Sirius and Harry,” Remus pressed on, looking amused. “Like most nights, he was dressed in his normal ratty old boxers he fancied sleeping in, with a robe tossed on though not done up. As it's just me and Harry, it doesn't matter what he wears. Well, he went into the kitchen and turned on the lights only to end up confronted with all the girls and Harry in the kitchen.”
“And they were all in this skimpy lingerie, some kind of green goop on their faces, cotton balls between the toes, refrigerator door open, staring at me while I’m in these beat up old boxers,” Sirius snorted, shaking his head. “I'm not sure if I was more traumatized or they were.”
“You were,” Harry grinned, shoulders shaking. “Trust me! The look on your face was a riot. Then the rather high pitched scream kind of thing.”
“It was right traumatizing, Harry,” Sirius growled, looking at him. “And stunning. I didn't even have the bloody robe shut!”
“Your voice was a couple of octaves higher than normal,” Harry told him, still grinning, remembering what happened.
“Of course it was!” Sirius huffed, glaring at him. “Nothing like confronting what I did in my own kitchen.” Then he asked, tone thoughtful, “I've always wondered—what in Merlin's name was that green goop on everyone's face? Even you had it on.”
“Deep cleansing mask,” Harry told him.
Sirius just stared at him then looked at Remus, who was shaking his head, before he sighed. “And I never did figure out what you lot were in there for. It isn't like the elf wasn't delivering food for you.”
“We were looking for the right cucumbers,” Harry told him with a shrug.
“Cucumbers?” Sirius asked, eyebrows going up. “Do I want to know what you were planning to do with those?” He couldn't help it, his mind was immediately on the dirt track there.
“To use to reduce puffiness around the eyes,” Harry told him simply, rolling his eyes as he knew what Sirius, and several others, were probably thinking.
After contemplating that for a few seconds, Sirius admitted, “It's sometimes mildly disturbing you know so much about this junk, you know this, right?”
“I've never had problems with acne or things like razor bumps after I hooked up with them, did I?” Harry shot right back, grinning at Sirius.
“He does have a point there,” Remus said, looking amused.
With a snort, Sirius just rolled his eyes then changed back to what they were talking about. “Yeah, well, it was still right traumatizing. Especially when I heard a chorus of 'ew' from them.”
“Was for them too,” Harry chuckled, nudging Sirius. “Adding a year on to their therapy sessions was mentioned more than once.”
“It’s not funny!” Sirius told him, huffing.
“It was too!” Harry laughed, shaking his head. “The look on your face, not to mention the scramble to shut your robe then the mad run out of the kitchen was a riot. Brave and courageous didn't factor in to anything that happened.”
“I don't know about that, but the look on his face when he came back into the bedroom and how he plastered his back to the door, arms out, like he was trying to barricade it was hilarious,” Remus admitted with a smile. “He vowed we weren't leaving the room on nights they had a slumber party again.”
“Marissa took a picture of him like that, so I could show you,” Harry chuckled, elbowing Remus.

“She did not!” Sirius snarled, hoping like hell it wasn't true as he didn't want a visual reminder of the trauma. “She didn't have her phone with her.”
“Sirius, she takes the phone to the loo with her,” Harry snorted, picking up his and flipping through the pictures to find the one she took of Sirius. “Of course she had the phone with her.” After just a couple moments, he had it then grinned and showed Sirius.
“Gah!” Sirius said, eyes going buggy as he saw the stunned moving picture of himself from that night. “Give me that thing! Delete it or something!” Then he tried to grab the phone.
“No chance,” Harry chuckled, yanking the phone away and showing Remus.
“Well, you did looked rather panicked, Sirius,” Remus snorted, amused by the picture and look on Sirius face as he hadn't seen it before.
Head in his hands, Sirius shook his head and groaned. “Why did she take a picture?”
Hearing laughter around the table and people asking to see, Harry told him, “She takes pictures of everything, Sirius, you know that. Of course she would this. And she made sure to send it to me in case I could 'use' it for something.”
“Sounds like perfect blackmail material to me,” Ron chuckled, shaking his head. This was a riot to listen to. Though he wanted time alone with Harry to talk to him about so much, this was fun too. He was just upset he didn't get to share some of it with his old friend.
“It wasn't all bad, you know,” Harry said, nudging Sirius. “What came the next day was good.”
Before anyone could ask, Remus explained, still looking amused, “The girls chipped in and bought Sirius a very nice pair of silk pajamas, some new boxers and a beautiful robe.”
“Adding in a business card for a shop that did tattoo removal,” Harry snorted, shoulders still shaking.
“Yeah, well, it didn't help,” Sirius grunted, shaking his head. “Though the clothes were nice and the bloke that ran the shop did a great job on removing the tattoos, it is still something that gives me nightmares. Remus and I now refuse to come out of our room on the nights we host the slumber parties.”
“I don't blame you there,” Molly said, body heaving from repressed laughter, red in the face, swiping at the tears starting to stream from her eyes.
“It was a lesson Sirius won't ever forget, I assure you,” Remus added, shaking his head.
“Ever,” Sirius groaned, head dropped forward.
“You lived,” Harry chuckled then answered the phone when it rang again. This call would keep him busy for the rest of their stay, something he was thankful for. If he was busy, they couldn't question him much, what they wanted.
Still looking amused, Remus said, “California, and Harry's friends, are one huge adventure, even for the mundane.”
“It sounds like it,” Ginny chuckled, smiling at what she heard.
With a shake of his head, Arthur said, “It doesn't sound like it was ever boring.”
“It's not,” Sirius admitted, grinning again.
Since Harry was busy on the phone, Arthur began to ask some more questions, trying to get some answers. While it was great to reconnect, as they needed all the help they could get in so many areas, they also wanted to know what they could so they could deal accordingly.

“Is it me, or did the three of them do a good job of dodging direct questions about so much?” Bill asked, looking around the table. Their guests had left not long ago as it was getting late. Though they all had fun, getting a good laugh out of some of the stories they told, any real answers to questions so many had didn't get answered.
“They did,” Arthur admitted with a nod. “It's probably ingrained or they don't want to talk about it. We'll have them over again soon and see what we can get. Well, we'll also assure them it won't be used for nefarious purposes.”
“We did learn some,” Molly said, pouring a drink for everyone and settling down again. “Most of all the three are quite happy and Harry seems to have grown up so well.”
“Makes you wonder what's going on, though,” Ron admitted after taking a sip of his drink. “I mean, it sounds odd, like this is more than just friends.”
“Not to tell tales, but the talk always was Remus and Sirius, though very good friends, were also quite interested in each other,” Arthur said softly. “We knew both were interested in women, of course, but we heard there might be a relationship there as well. What we heard does lean that way.”
“It doesn't matter if that's the case,” Molly tossed in there. “They are obviously very good with Harry, giving him a wonderful life and taking care of him in a way that awful family of his didn't.”
“They seem very happy,” Hermione said with a smile, though she was curious about so much. “Maybe Ron and I can write to Harry to see what we can find out. He was distracted tonight.”
“That might be a good way to reconnect,” Arthur nodded. “We'll have them over again soon. This time we'll make sure Harry doesn't have something planned so we can spend more time talking.”
“It was fun, though,” Fred chuckled.
“Listening to them was a riot,” George laughed.
“At least they're happy,” Charlie said.
“True,” Molly smiled. Then, with a sigh, she added, “We do need to fill them in on what's going on so they don't land in a mess. I doubt they've been back long enough to know just what's happening.”
“Very true,” Arthur nodded. “Let me see what I can set up. I imagine they're plenty busy with the business from here on out. I'll manage, don't worry.” He would, too. There were so many questions he wanted answered and would find a way. Then they needed to get them to help. Yes, they would have them over again soon.

“Well, we managed to dodge the worst,” Remus told Sirius with a contented sigh. The three of them were ensconced in one of the parlors after they returned. Harry was sprawled out between them, leaning against Sirius with his feet propped up on Remus' thigh, still talking to his friends. He had earbuds in so he wouldn't disturb either of them.
“This time,” Sirius told him, sipping at his beer. “It won't last. I'm sure they'll be more overt next time and ask direct questions. And I doubt we can get away with what we did this time.”
“True,” Remus admitted with a shake of his head. “We'll deal accordingly. For now, everyone can speculate. Until it becomes public knowledge, we will let them.”
“Yeah,” Sirius sighed, slouching a little, slipping an arm around Harry the best he could. “It's coming, though. All of it will end up out there. We just need to do it a little at a time so we don't cause an uproar.”
“As we've done something similar before, we can again this time,” Remus told him, sipping his own drink. “We just hold off the biggest that we know will cause problems until the very last. All we can do.”
“And stay out of the middle of this nightmare,” Sirius groaned. “Yeah, we will,” he then agreed. “It'll just take some work.”
“I say, when Harry gets off the phone, we go relax,” Remus suggested. “We can worry about this mess tomorrow and see what it brings up. No sense buying ourselves more stress than we have to. We can then work out how to handle some of the more direct questions we know are coming in a way to hold off the worst.”
“We'll do that,” Sirius nodded. As he looked down at Harry, he smiled.
This was good, though. Harry looked like he was feeling better now that he was involved with his friends. With all that was coming, it would help to have him talk to them. Especially since they all would end up cooped up in this damned house so much. Yeah, the girls were good for Harry. It gave him a chance to be a normal teenager with them, something he and Remus both wanted for him. While he couldn't remain that way with all that was going on here, they were going to give him as much of it as they could manage while they dealt with the nightmare they knew they'd get pulled into.
As he tried to relax, Sirius discussed the normal with Remus, trying to decide what they could all do that night to have some fun. It was a way to hold off the worry, nothing more. If they could stay distracted, they wouldn't go as mental over the mess. It was something they all needed, that's for damned sure.
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