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Memories of Deception	By : professorflo Category: Harry Potter > General > General Views: 20868 -:- Recommendations : 1 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any of the characters within. I make no money from this story.

Chapter List
- 1-Memories of Deception
- 2-2
- 3-3
- 4-4
- 5-5
- 6-6
- 7-7
- 8-8
- 9-9.
- 10-10
- 11-11
- 12-12
- 13-13
- 14-14
- 15-15
- 16-16
- 17-17
- 18-18
- 19-19
- 20-20
- 21-21
- 22-22
- 23-23
- 24-24
- 25-25
- 26-26
- 27-27
- 28-28
- 29-29
- 30-30
- 31-31
- 32-32
- 33-33
- 34-34
- 35-35
- 36-36
- 37-37
- 38-38
- 39-39
- 40-40
- 41-41
- 42-42
- 43-43
- 44-44
- 45-45
- 46-46
- 47-47
- 48-48
- 49-49
- 50-50
- 51-51
- 52-52
- 53-53
- 54-54
- 55-55
- 56-56
- 57-57
- 58-58
- 59-59
- 60-60
- 61-61
- 62-62
- 63-63
- 64-64
- 65-65
- 66-66
- 67-67
- 68-68
- 69-69
- 70-70
- 71-71
- 72-72
- 73-73
- 74-74
- 75-75
- 76-76
- 77-77
- 78-78
- 79-79
- 80-80
- 81-81
- 82-82
- 83-83
- 84-84
- 85-85
- 86-86
- 87-87
- 88-88
- 89-89
- 90-90
- 91-91
- 92-92
- 93-93
- 94-94
- 95-95
- 96-96
- 97-97
- 98-98
- 99-99
- 100-100
- 101-101
- 102-102
- 103-103
- 104-104
- 105-105
- 106-106
- 107-107
- 108-108
- 109-109
- 110-110
- 111-111
- 112-112
- 113-113
- 114-114
- 115-115
- 116-116
- 117-117
- 118-118
- 119-119
- 120-120
- 121-121
- 122-122
- 123-123
- 124-124
- 125-125
- 126-126
- 127-127
- 128-128
- 129-129
- 130-130
- 101
- 102
- 103
Disclaimer: See chapter 1

Hermione shuddered. She didn't think she'd ever get used to the feeling of the way her memories slotted back into place. At least it wasn't painful, but she'd never be able to describe the sensation as pleasant. It was strange, suddenly finding herself with memories that felt like they had been there all along, when the two sets of memories she had of her time with him were so at odds with each other. Even knowing what she knew now it was hard to equate the man who tortured her so callously with the one who held her so gently when she needed reassurance.
He hadn't seemed to be able to stop himself seeking out her company over the weekend in the memories she had just reintegrated into her head. He'd wandered back into the library a few hours later to remind her of the late hour. It was only then that she'd realised just how tired she was, and they had both soon after retired for the evening. Snape had transfigured a cot for himself while she'd slept in his bed once again. He'd told her then that he hoped to give her the whole weekend to work, as Voldemort had informed him he was going abroad and they wouldn't be called for at least a fortnight.
They had barely spoken all the next day, except at mealtimes, but whenever Snape had excused himself, citing some pressing work to complete or matters to attend to, he had always appeared again shortly after, settling into the armchair that she thought of as his, while Hermione herself had alternated between working at the desk and in the armchair she favoured.
She'd felt him watching her, but instead being irritated by it, she'd found his presence comforting. She was so used to the boys constantly asking her questions when she was trying to work, that it was a pleasant change to be in company with someone who was capable of sitting quietly, even if he wasn't actually reading his book as intently as he appeared to be when she occasionally glanced up at him. She'd wondered why he sought her out so consistently, only to be silent. What was it he'd wanted?
The next day had gone much the same way, the only difference being when Snape had asked her for another sample of her blood to make up some more of the calming draught. However, as the day had drawn on Snape had become more and more restless, snapping at her when she'd eventually asked what was wrong. He'd apologised later, as she lay in her own bed, although he'd still refused to explain why he was clearly in such a bad mood.
She'd forgiven him anyway, and managed to stay calm even when he'd explained how he would have to go through the motions of testing her reaction to the Cruciatus curse. He'd looked so miserable that she'd lent forward to kiss him on the cheek, whispering her thanks. The look on his face only made her wish there was more she could do. His behaviour all day had suddenly made sense as she realised he'd been dreading taking her memories once more.
Hermione looked at the now shorter row of phials still waiting for her and reached out for one. She paused for a moment as there was an ominously loud rumble. The whole castle shook around her. Knowing the battle was on hold, for the moment at least, she could only assume some damaged part of the building somewhere had collapsed. She squeezed her eyes tight through the worst of the tremors, only opening them once the floor had stopped shuddering.
The phials still sat neatly before her. She grabbed the next one and opened it.
Mere seconds later she was in possession of another one of her memories, and she cringed at the recollection of lashing out at him while he just stood there and accepted her fury as if he believed he deserved it. He'd eventually restrained her, apologising and explaining why he had gone searching for a memory that Voldemort had mentioned and found the one of her masturbating in the bath.
Hermione groaned, rubbing her face with her hands tiredly, the shame of that day just as vivid as when it had happened. I can't believe he saw that… The end of the memory had been interesting. She'd figured out the possible identity of one of the horcruxes and had spoken to Dumbledore about meeting Harry. Perhaps she'd get to see that in the next memory. She picked up another phial.
The new memory spun and settled in her head. The thought of going to meet the boys on the beach made her smile. They'd been so concerned about where she'd been, and had tried their hardest to persuade her to stay with them. That dream she'd had however…. Hermione shuddered. Strange how prophetic it had turned out to be. Not the part where Voldemort had found out Snape was a traitor to his cause, but how the snake had attacked her, sinking it's fangs into her neck. The dream had been horribly vivid… though no way near as terrifying as actually watching Snape die.
Hermione had to fight down the rising bile in her throat. I can't believe he's dead. After all he did for us, all those years, he'll never see any recognition for it. She could feel the tears building in her eyes. No… there'll be time to cry later. Keep going Hermione. She sighed and reached out her hand again.
A moment of disorientation and she was one more step towards filling in the blank spots in her memory. Well at least I know now why I agreed to make that promise to obey him so quickly… But the emotions… they'd all been hers. Amplified, yes, by the potion she'd spent ages convincing him to give her, but they'd been there in the first place.
She'd been lucky that time, he'd managed to calm her down enough to get some reason out of her, then something she'd said had triggered one of the best ideas he'd had since the whole thing began. Why the hell didn't he think of the time turner earlier? It could have saved us all that effort in trying to convince both me and Voldemort that I was still losing memories!
At least it had given her time to ask both Snape and Dumbledore as many questions as she'd needed to ask for her own peace of mind. Snape had also explained how Voldemort was getting impatient with her progress and was urging him to move faster with converting her. Her own idea had been almost as genius as his, although it had been influenced not only by the strange way Snape made her feel safe, even when she believed him to be bad, but by her intensifying feelings for him. She'd been rightly confused and worried about how she seemed to be falling for the man under such circumstances, but considering the alternatives, the lust potion was the best option.
Snape had been almost horrified at her plan, and hadn't agreed at first. He'd barely been able to look at her either. She'd taken some time trying to convince him how much better it would be for the both of them if she wasn't fighting him. She argued that if he had more control over her, Voldemort would be pleased, and perhaps not require Snape to punish her, especially if he believed her loyalty was wavering. And at least she would be tied to Snape, not to Voldemort. Snape would be able to release her from any instructions she had been given at a later date.
Snape had then come up with one last objection: the potion itself. A love potion would be too strong, too obvious. She would turn into a simpering fool, and Voldemort would realise straight away what had happened. Hermione had blushed fiercely as she replied that a lust potion would work instead. Snape knew as well as she did, that the potion would only enhance emotions that were already there, and by suggesting such a thing she was basically declaring that she had feelings for him.
The expression on his face had been so pained at this admission that her heart had sunk, and believing he was repelled by the thought she had quickly spoken up again, reminding him that many of his actions over the past few weeks had been designed to make her lust for him. She had kept quiet about the fact that her feelings for him were slightly more complicated than just that, as she still didn't know quite what they were herself.
Unable to look at her still, but out of arguments, Snape had finally relented. He'd left her shortly after to make a quick patrol around the castle, saying he wanted to check on the Carrows, as they were adept at knowing when he was out of the castle and taking advantage. Hermione had thought it an excuse to escape from her presence for a while, although she hadn't minded, feeling rather awkward about her admission. Snape had returned to find her immersed in the first of her removed memories. He'd almost kissed her then, but she'd pulled back. After taking the potion she'd had no qualms about her kissing her, she'd begged him to do so in fact. And then he'd taken her memories once more.
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Memories of Deception