Torment *Completed* | By : Kvarta Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female > Snape/Hermione Views: 31713 -:- Recommendations : 3 -:- Currently Reading : 8 |
Disclaimer: This is a work of fan fiction. Harry Potter is owned by J.K. Rowling. This story is purely for entertainment purposes, no money is being made from it. |
A/N: It is January the 1st, 2019 - and I delayed posting of this chapter to post it on the first day of the new year. I wish you all Happy New Year!
This story is closing to its end, only about dozen chapters left, more or less. And I never planned to write the dinner scene, but Scaleybark planted a worm in my head, so Happy New Year Scaleybark ;)
P.S.: For those who wait for Blur, I'm just waiting for my beta to finish editing.
P.S.S.: Still not beta edited, and running only on Grammarly so...
Hermione rummaged through her trunk, her heart still beat fast. Severus was different. She was twice now in his head, but this time it was different. He still didn’t let her see anything but there were pockets of warmth in his mind and pockets of icy cold almost crushing grief. And still, he was different, better, more like she would imagine him bee.
He looked different as well. Not so haunted. Sure he was still grim and he was still as cuddly as angry porcupine but she never expected for that to change, it was who he is. Oddly, that air of gruffness suited him, she could never imagine him behaving like Harry or Hagrid or even Draco.
She chanced a glance at him, he was sitting in the chair, the book opened in his lap but he was gazing at the fire. He had a healthy complexion, he still looked whip-thin but he wasn’t malnourished, his hair a bit longer, falling over his shoulders. Her heart climbed to his throat. Picking up a bundled robes she cleared her throat and headed to the bathroom.
She should have counted her blessings really. Hermione still couldn’t decide what made her change her decision to free him after holidays. Just seeing him there, standing, back straight and his posture same as she remembered- it was enough incentive for her to reconsider her decision. He deserved to be whole, returned to what he once was. No! Even better, unburdened by guilt and self-loathing. The reality was that she didn’t have any right or any chance. She also didn’t want him to be the target of that deluded family that had her in mind as a bride.
Severus might know how to…
The thought propelled her to action, she burst in the room forcing him to gaze at her with disapproval.
“I see that only a few months in that school robbed you of all you learned here.” he quipped.
“I need your help.” She blurbed and his head tilted in question, eyebrows arching. “You are maybe the only person who can understand my point of view and also the only person who might know how I can get out of this. Well, maybe not the only one, but certainly the only one willing to share that knowledge with me.”
“Pray tell, Hermione, what made you think that I’d be willing to share that alleged knowledge?” he asked, voice flat.
“Because you hate when someone is forced to do something against his or her will. And I can’t stress enough how much I don’t want this.” she crossed hands over her chest, resisting a need to hug herself.
“I believe I was clear when I informed you that I’m done playing a patsy or rescuer of the lost.” Severus frowned.
“All I ask is to tell me if you know how I can get myself out of my predicament, there are no books on the matter so I need someone willing to share what is considered common knowledge. Well, I grew up in Muggle world, the knowledge is anything by common for me.” Hermione said, her heart beating in her throat. She bunched the robe in her hands, letting material to soak the sweat from her palms.
“Very well, what is the predicament that you need my advice for? And I’m not saying I’ll help before I know…” he started.
Fear grabbed her, unreasonable fear. She had the need to run and hid, like it wasn’t enough that she had to deal with unrequired love, now she had to tell the man she loved that another family want her as the bride to be… But what other option she had?
“Well, during my time in Hogwarts I noticed that certain portrait is following me. Finally, I found out that she was checking up on me for the family that decided I’m a perfect match for their son.” She said almost breathless, words flow fast and a bit jumbled, but she kept talking afraid that if she stops or slows down she’ll lose her courage. “They based that on Magic index compatibility, now I don’t know how anyone could find what my index is, but I do suspect it is one of the families with board members. They are the only ones that could see my …”
“Or one of the portraits could tell them. Did you try to get information from the portrait they used?” he asked, nodding.
“I did, it… It didn’t end well.” Hermione cleared her throat uncomfortably. “Let’s just say it involved Incendio and me being banned from use of magic outside class on school grounds.” Hermione blinked. Is he laughing at me? She could swear that the corners of Severus’ lips tugged up. “Anyway, I got nothing. And I don’t care who the family is. I just want to know how to say no and in an acceptable way.”
Severus nodded, his face unchanged. A long silence stretched between them. She lowered her hand in the lap, kneading them.
“Did you ever consider the possibility of accepting the offer?” he raised his hand to stop her words. “Compatibility with the magic index is more than just- as Muggles would say the question of compatible genetics. It is not a soulmate thing or anything that idiotic, but… It is very hard to explain, there are no proper words, however, it is more. Lucius and Narcissa, Weasley’s, many of your friends' families are matched based on that. The good example of a person who rejected that custom is Mrs Zabini, or however she is called now.”
“But…” she tried.
“I am still talking, Hermione.” He cut her off sharply. “Not everyone is blessed with a good match. From what you described, it sounds that you have a nearly perfect match. Considering your history, and still present sub-current in the question about Muggleborns… In one thing you are correct, it has to be one of the Pureblood families, only they have enough connections with Hogwarts portraits.”
“I do not want that. Not…” he voice cracked, tears pricking her eyes.
“I see, so there is someone else.” He said with a confident tone and she widened her eyes, trying to push back the fear, but her heart quivered. “Come now, Hermione, I was a teacher and Head of House for almost twenty years. It is hard for me not to see through the real reason why you refuse to even reconsider. I know that you have your own misguided set of moral rules and that this goes against them. Still, your repulsiveness and eagerness to avoid it at any cost is a tell.” he smirked. “Don’t tell me it is Weasley.”
She flinched. “No, of course, it isn’t. How-how can you even think of it.”
“Love is not rational...” he directed his gaze to the flames. “A simple no will suffice. No one can force you, and their pursue isn’t binding. But I would advise you to reconsider.”
“Thank you, but I made my decision.” she lowered her eyes to the floor.
Snape suddenly stood up. “It is time. Follow me.”
She almost forgot about the dinner. With the sense of dread, she followed Snape through the maze of corridors and down, until they ended up in a posh dining room. The long table could fit a dozen people easily. Hermione frowned, she could never live like this, the rich space of dining room was cold and impersonal.
The door clicked and Narcissa entered, her hand casually curled around Lucius’.
“Ah, you are already here. Let us sit.” Narcissa smiled politely.
Severus pulled out the chair for her and Hermione had a need to scream, not to mention choke, this was more than she expected of him. Then again, she never had a chance to observe him in the social surroundings, somehow she had the feeling that Hogwarts didn’t count. A sudden appearance of food snapped her to reality.
“Are we waiting for Draco?” she asked.
“No. Draco took Astoria out.” smiled Narcissa. “Bon appetit.”
Everyone started eating, silence plucked on her nerves as she tried to force the soup down her throat, it seemed like the liquid was full of needles. Or maybe it was just a sitting arrangement, placing Narcissa and Lucius across Severus and her.
“How is school, Miss Granger?” Lucius asked, his tone casual.
“Still standing...” she replied, unsure why is she so mad at that question coming from Malfoy.
“I hear that you had some-mishaps, shall we say…” Lucius continued.
“Nothing I couldn’t deal with.” she smiled, trying not to show too many of her teeth. Ah, I knew I had a reason.
“Hmh.” hummed Lucius, with the corner of her eyes she noticed that Narcissa and Severus exchanged glances. “You have only a few more months, did you considered what will you do after?”
It was on the tip of her tongue to tell him that it isn’t his place to ask such question, remembering the book on etiquette she bit her inner cheek. Lucius was obviously trying to provoke her, masking a provocation in benign small talk. She lowered her spoon, clearing her throat.
“I do have a few options I’m thinking off. Law seems like the most interesting, that would include working at the Ministry.” She replied politely but flatly.
“Interesting, I would advise against it, however.” Lucius said he didn’t even do as much to glance at her.
Anger boiled inside. Who does he think he is? But before she managed to reply, her entire body stiffened. The place where Severus touched her leg burned, heart-stopping then resuming in double speed. His voice send sparks down her back, a cold ball settled in her stomach.
“Indeed.” Severus agreed.
“Why?” she turned to look at Severus’ blank face.
“You lack connections and wealth. Then there is a matter of your blood status…” started Lucius and she cut him off.
“I have connections, I am fiend with the Minister, in case you have forgotten, as well as with a few high officials. I also have my reward gold and my status as a War Hero. I also helped Draco, I even have a few favours I can call on.” she glared at Malfoy.
“Is that so?” Lucius smirked in his soup. “As admirable as your political tendencies are, Miss Granger, you are far off. Your War Hero status won’t last for long, and only the Boy Menace will be able to milk it the longest. Calling on favours is admirable Slytherin way of thinking, with one slight flaw, Malfoys lost their footing. And in case you haven’t noticed even our dear Minister so open-minded is still a Pureblood, most of the high officials are. You are not nearly enough old or accomplished to earn your single vote in Wizengamot.”
“Before Hermione hex you, Lucius,” Snape interjected in Lucius’ speech. “Hermione, I advise you to observe Harry and Minister tomorrow. I do not think that you would be as amenable as Mr Potter is to play a trained monkey.”
“Fine, I’ll observe.” she hissed, still angry but mellowed wit’s Snape’ words, after all, he gave her a choice and opportunity to see and deduce on her own. The oddity of the situation gnawed on the corners of her mind but anger jarred her to keep on arguing her point. Hermione was sick and tired of Lucius’ high-and-mighty ways. “For your information Mr Malfoy, things are changing. That Pureblood supremacy idea you nurture is crumbling…”
“Is it?” Lucius raised an eyebrow. “Stand me corrected, but didn’t you destroy a school property because that idea still lives?”
“I did not.” she raised her chin. “The painting and the frame are impervious to fire, I only singed it a bit.”
All heads turned to her, Hermione could swear that she heard Snape chuckle under his breath.
“Be that as it may, you can tell that ideas of keeping it in the close circle are still alive.” menacing smile danced around Lucius’ lips.
“What does one archaic custom has to do with your paranoid and corrupted ideas? In case you forgot I am Muggleborn.” She glared at Lucius.
“Don’t remind me.” Lucius rolled his eyes. “But pureblood dogma as you called it is in its core what is happening to you. The fact is that it was corrupted over the years, and yes- a paranoia of the XVI century did contribute to it through the Salazar’ ideas. In its core, Miss Ignoramus the pure-blooded was used to all magical humans. After all, we all have roots in Muggle descendants.”
Hermione gasped, how was that she didn’t know this? And how they came from all magical humans to only those with magical parents?
“I...I don’t understand. If you know all this then how…?”
“How can I dislike your kind?” Lucius raised an eyebrow and she flinched. “Easy. You, Muggleborns, disrespect our customs, you bring your skewed ideas and think that we are the ones who have to change. I do believe that a small history lesson is in order, you see Dark Ages sent magical humans into hiding. The intermarriages were safe, over the time they became valued. Every outsider could bring doom to the community, outsiders, especially non-magical, or those raised in Muggle households and with Muggle ideas- were a danger to us.”
“But we are not in Dark Ages anymore!” she exclaimed.
“No, we are not. And during the first war, there was more leniency towards Muggleborns, they just proved to be more resilient and willing to oppose Dark Lord's ideas. He hated Muggles, not those with magical blood, regardless of their parentage. Furthermore, yes the families who maintained the old customs of intermarriage to only proven magical lineages saw the opportunity in this.”
“Opportunity?” she gaped at Lucius.
“You see if you cast out or demoted to a lesser status all those who can’t prove their Magical purity they lose their right to the vaults. The loot was divided among those more- deserving. We gained more wealth and most of the power positions. It is nothing personal, Miss Granger, it is simply a matter of economics.”
Hermione choked on air. “You, you vile, sleazy… No, no, I won’t, I can’t sit at the same table with you.” She jumped, tumbling the chair and dashed out. She could hear Narcissa’ sharp reprimand and Severus laughing at Lucius.
Emotions stirred inside her, she had a need to blast something. She was appalled with what Lucius told her. She was more than confused with how Severus behaved, so much unlike himself.
He’s in therapy now, you don’t know how he is. I wonder if anyone knows?
“So you tried to burn the Hogwarts portrait?” Draco’ voice behind her made her jump. Draco narrowed his eyes. “Dinner went that well, huh?”
“Yes, I got in-depth insight into pureblood dogma history.” she hissed, Malfoy’ really weren’t her favourite people right now.
Draco chuckled. “Oh, dad managed to distract mum from badgering him about Ball. Way to go, dad.”
“You meant to say…” she gaped, it never occurred to her that Lucius was intentional and that conversation didn’t just happen. I should have known.
“So, will you give my father a free pass, or are you going to return and give him what he deserves?” Draco raised an eyebrow and she smirked at him.
“Since when you want to make it difficult for your father?”
“Since always.” Draco winked, leading her back to the dining room.
“Look whom I found steaming up the portrait frames,” Draco said cheerfully and Severus stood up to pull her chair again.
“Nice to see you joining us, I would, however, apologize to Narcissa.” there was a note of sarcasm in Severus’ voice while he whispered those words to her. Hermione nodded, not so much to thank Severus as to let him know that she accepts his advice.
“My apologies for the outburst.” she said to all looking at Narcissa who smiled at her.
“So, what was the topic that drove our resident Muggleborn out of the dining room?” Draco asked cheerily, he looked overly happy. Too happy, in fact.
“Miss Granger's future occupation. I advised her against politics, she didn’t take it well.” Lucius said smoothly.
Hermione frowned but she refused to take the bait for the second time that evening. Draco grinned at his father.
“I agree unless hexing is a part of the job she wouldn’t do well. Hey, Granger, why not Potions?” Draco turned to her and she tilted her head.
What is he up to now?
“Hermione is a competent brewer but she does lack creativity…” Severus started and she had to swallow her anger again.
“I would be interested in Potions or Arithmancy…” she nodded with less enthusiasm.
Draco smirked at Snape, ignoring her attempt to talk. “Are you sure, I’d say she’s plenty imaginative, and besides, you could be her Master, teach her…”
“Draco, I can’t teach intuition. And with my problem, I can’t be much of a Master to anyone. If memory serves I refused you.” Severus gave one sharp glance to Draco who squirmed on his seat.
“True, but there is a cure now, and sooner or later you will be free of the post-crushiatus stress, your problem won't progress enough to incapacitate you.” Draco nodded, his smile did look a tad bit uncomfortable but he kept on talking. “ Besides, I finally decided what I’m going to do.”
“Continue the Malfoy tradition, naturally.” Lucius injected.
“No. I’m going to be a healer.” Draco smiled.
Severus nodded approvingly, Narcissa clapped her hands in delight, Hermione held her breath while Lucius had a shocked face.
Sitting on her other side Draco leaned to whisper to her. “Oh, Granger, you may say thank you to me, I managed to convince mother- Astoria and I choose your attire for tomorrow’s Ball.”
Her mouth fell open, she turned to gape at Draco, not angry or confused but truly worried.
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