Adult-FanFiction.org : Harry Potter

To Have Not	By : MontanaDan Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Harry/Snape Views: 22763 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 10
- 11
AN: This is the last chapter of To Have Not. I hope you enjoyed it. The series will continue (lots of stuff to wrap up) in To Have and To Keep. Don't forget, if you want updates emailed to you, you have to leave your email address. You can leave it on the review board or email me directly. Enjoy!
To Have Not

Chapter 11 - Transitions
Harry ran hard and fast until he began to notice he was far from the Manor grounds. He wasn't sure how far he had run or for how long. Exhausted, he transformed to get his bearings and keep from being seen in his jaguar form.
Glancing around, he spotted Hedwig circling nearby and raised his arm. As she settled on his arm, he caught his breath and scanned his surroundings. He really had no idea where he was. As weary as he felt, he wondered if he should risk Apparating all the way to Sirius'. Of course, he could go to Hogwarts but then he'd have to deal with all sorts of questions and he certainly didn't want that, especially since he hadn't had time to think about any of it yet.
Decisively, he tucked his owl under his arm, and wrapped his robe around her. "Easy, girl," he soothed when she fussed at the confinement. "It'll only take a minute."
Determined, he closed his eyes and pictured his destination. With a pop he was gone and another pop later, he reappeared across the ocean. He quickly released Hedwig and she flew to the nearby fence, squawking at him.
He moved to apologize but was suddenly hit with a wave of exhaustion. Already weary from his run and now more from the expenditure of power, Harry stumbled up the front walk. He could hear the breakers crashing against the beach behind the house.
"Harry, my dear! Good morning."
Harry barely had the energy to turn his head. Sirius' neighbor was gardening. "Hello, Elliott," he said. "Is Sirius here?"
"I haven't seen them leave," said El. He got up, brushing himself off and adjusting his hat against the late morning sun. "Would you like to come in for some coffee?"
"Um, no thanks," Harry said wearily as he knocked on the door. His legs started to shake unsteadily and he leaned against the doorframe. "Sirius!" he called. He really wanted to lay down now.
"You look beat," came across the fence.
Harry only nodded, wishing Sirius would open the door already. "Sirius!" he called again. He certainly didn't want to fall down in front of Sirius' neighbors, especially nosy, touchy-feely Elliott.
The door opened abruptly and Sirius stood before him looking impatient, and almost as weary as Harry. "What the-"
"Sirius," Harry breathed with relief as he fell forward into his godfather's surprised arms.
*******
Sirius looked down at the collapsed man in his arms and quickly dragged him inside the house. "Harry?" he called softly. "Are you alright? What happened?"
Maneuvering him into the living room, he laid Harry's form onto the couch. "Harry?"
"Just tired," Harry mumbled.
Remus moved shakily into the room, looking the way he always did the morning after the full moon.
Harry noticed him and murmured, "Damn. Forgot about the full moon. 'Sorry."
"Sirius, what's-? OH!" Remus moved to the couch. "Is he alright?"
"Remus, go back to bed," Sirius snapped. "You need your rest after last night."
"I'm fine. What-"
"Harry, what happened?" Sirius asked again.
"'m sorry, Sirius," Harry said sleepily. "So tired. Need sleep."
Sirius blinked as the young man fell into sleep - or unconsciousness. Remus pulled a wand, Sirius wasn't sure if it was his or Remus', and ran it over Harry's body.
"He's not hurt," Remus assured, looking at the results of his scan. "It just looks like he's exhausted, physically and magically."
"But why? And where the hell is Malfoy?" Sirius ranted. "Isn't he supposed to-"
"Sirius," Remus interrupted. "If Harry Apparated from England, of course he'd be drained."
"And what about the exhaustion?" Sirius demanded. "What the hell has he been doing?"
"Why don't you call over there and ask?" Remus suggested.
As Remus made Harry more comfortable on the sofa, Sirius moved to the Floo. The house elf wouldn�t tell him what was going on, in fact, he seemed somewhat distressed, which caused Sirius to become more concerned.
"Maybe I'll just pop over there," Sirius said.
"You can't just-"
"I'll Floo to Hogsmeade then Apparate from there," Sirius said. He rushed upstairs to get his wand. When he returned, Remus was still fussing over Harry.
"It looks like he'll be asleep for a while," Remus told him.
"I need to know what happened," Sirius said, shrugging into a robe. "I'll be back as quick as I can."
"Be careful," Remus urged. Sirius moved to the fireplace. "And don't kill anyone," he added. "We don't know what's going on yet."
"I won't," Sirius promised and tossed a fist full of Floo powder into the flames. " The Hog's Head, Hogsmeade!" he said and spun away from the beach house.
Being both a Black, and Harry�s godfather, Sirius was able to Apparate through the wards to the front gates of Malfoy Manor. He moved quickly across the estate towards the house and his strides quickened when he saw the front door standing wide open.
From the threshold, he peered in cautiously, wand drawn. Snape was lying inside the hall, but there was no sign of Malfoy.
"Malfoy," he called, stepping into the foyer. "Malfoy," he called again, approaching Snape's prone form. He pushed the body onto his back. Snape's face was twisted in pain and despair, but physically, he appeared fine.
Maybe Lucius had lost his mind or something, and Snape had been there. Maybe Snape had distracted Malfoy and Harry had run away. Sirius was only momentarily distracted by the epiphany that he trusted Snape more than Malfoy.
"Snape?" he said, shaking the man's shoulder. Snape's body was trembling now so Sirius knew he wasn't dead. Which was a definite plus as Sirius really wanted to know what happened now and it looked as if Snape was his best source of information.
Sirius glanced around again. Still no sign of Malfoy. "Snape?"
Snape groaned and his body twitched.
"What were you hit with?"
"Living Nightmare," was the mumbled reply.
Sirius smirked. That was a good one. Snape would have been forced to exist in his worst nightmare. He wondered how long Snape had been unconscious.
"Black?"
"Yeah."
"Where's Potter?" Snape asked, struggling to regain his composure. "Is he alright?"
Sirius frowned at the implication. "He's at my house with Remus, but he's exhausted," he said. "I've come to find out what the hell happened." He helped Snape sit up. "Where's Malfoy?"
Occasional tremors still shuddered over Snape's body as he looked around the room, his eyes scanning the floor. Then he pointed down the hall a bit. Sirius looked, but all he saw was some kind of salamander. His eyes widened and he rifled a look back at Snape. "You-you turned him into a-"
"A newt," Snape calmly supplied. "Unfortunately, Lucius got off a curse as well."
"What were you fighting about?" Sirius asked. "Does it have anything to do with Harry?"
"Yes," Snape said as he pushed to his feet. He seemed to be coming fully out of the hex and he straightened out his robes. "Potter really should be telling you the details, but suffice to say that the betrothal contract has been voided."
"Really?" Sirius said, relief and happiness spreading over him. Then he frowned. "Harry?"
"I'm afraid Potter left here quite annoyed with both of us. He transformed and took off at a run. I can assume he Apparated to you." He glanced at the grandfather clock gracing the foyer. "That was approximately two hours ago."
"That explains the exhaustion," Sirius muttered. He didn't think he could run at top speed for ten minutes without collapsing, even in his Animagus form.
Severus sighed, and then grimaced as he looked across the hall at the newt. "I really should change Lucius back. You probably don't want to be here for it, Black. It may get unpleasant."
Sirius agreed. He certainly didn't want to deal with an irate Malfoy, and now, as Harry was no longer an issue, he didn't have to. "Well, for whatever it's worth," he told Snape, "thanks for whatever you did to get Harry out of that contract. Maybe now Harry'll start acting more like himself. Get over his last relationship�Get on with his life."
Snape only inclined his head.
Sirius left with some answers, intent on asking Harry the rest when he woke up.
*******

Oh, you should have told him that he was thanking you for making love to his godson.

Severus shivered at the memory of their tryst. By Merlin, it had been magical. And he wanted Harry back, in his arms, in his life, more than anything now.

Black will have puppies over that.

And now that Harry was free of Lucius-

Speaking of Lucius�

With a sigh, Severus bent down and picked up his wand. He considered the amphibian. Time to change Lucius back, and deal with the consequences. After all, he had been his best friend these many years.

No. Harry was your best friend.

True. He had shared so much more of himself with Harry.

And you do still need those newt's eyes.

Severus picked up Lucius' wand with his other hand and turned resolutely to his long time friend. With a wave, Lucius was again in human form and he quickly got to his feet, brushing himself off. There was no question of his rage.
"Severus, I should-"
"What? Hex me? You already did that, thank you very much. I suggest-"
"You suggest. How dare you come into MY home, seduce MY fiancé and ruin MY future-"
"At the expense of Harry's future?" Severus shook his head. "Not likely. Harry deserved the truth. I was wrong-"
"You WERE wrong, but it's too late for you. You lost him. I still have a chance."
"You think you still have a chance?" Severus said incredulously.

Lucius always was slow on the uptake.

"My chance is better than yours," Lucius argued. "I didn't reject him brutally and tell him he was - what was it? - oh, yes, 'a good fuck'."

Told you that would come back to haunt you.

"No. Instead you tried to trick him by making him pregnant. For Merlin's sake, Lucius, he didn't even know wizards could BE pregnant."
"But Harry would have become accustomed to it. He would have been happy. You know he's always wanted a family," Lucius raged. "But you had to-"
Severus straightened and sniffed. "As I said, that was unintentional."
Lucius scoffed. "You keep maintaining your innocence, but no one believes you. Least of all Harry. And how do you think he will feel when he's swelling with child?"
Severus blinked. "What?"
"Did you make the potion incorrectly?" Lucius challenged.
Indignant again, Severus snarled. "Certainly not. I am a professional."
Lucius nodded. "Precisely. Between the full moon and the potion, your interference could well interfere you right into fatherhood."
Severus blinked.

Oh, and you had no idea?

"But I'll make Harry see that I'm still the better man," Lucius continued. "I will take care of him and his child, regardless of who the father is."
Severus lifted his wand again. "Over my dead body."

He does make such a splendid newt.

Lucius drew himself up to his impressive height. "That can be arranged."
Severus sighed. "Lucius-"
"You may remove yourself from my home now, Severus."
"This is NOT over," Severus said darkly, moving to the door and throwing Lucius� wand on the table as he left.
"Not remotely," Lucius returned, slamming the door behind him.
**********
"I've sort of been acting like a git haven't I?" Harry said with a sigh. He, Ron and Hermione were lounged in Sirius' living room, each sprawled in their own chair by the fireplace.
Once his two best friends had found out that Harry was back at Sirius' house, they both raced to his aid. Harry had told them everything that had happened the day before.
"Well, you've had some bad times," Hermione offered.
"Bad times?" Ron scoffed. "He's had his heart ripped out by Snape and then he's been manipulated by Malfoy-"
"Ron," Harry cut him off before he could really get going. "While I appreciate the support, I don't need a recap. Snape did break my heart, even though now he's claiming that he did it because he didn't think he was good enough for me."
"He said that?" Ron asked curiously.
Harry nodded. "And I went with Lucius because it was easy way. I was so sick and tired of everything being so hard." Harry sat up from his slouch in the winged back chair. "Do you remember the speech Dumbledore made at the end of Fourth year?" Both of his friends nodded. "Dumbledore was right," he said. "I made a bad choice and did what was easy, instead of what was right."
Ron smirked. "Well, I knew it wouldn't work," he said smugly.
"You could have said," Harry muttered.
"We did say, mate," Ron insisted. "You weren't listening to anything anyone said, not even Sirius. And then once the engagement was set, you were always surrounded by Malfoys or else hidden away at the manor."
"Yes, well, I guess I was kind of hiding," Harry admitted.
"But I knew it wouldn't take six months before Malfoy did something stupid or you came to your senses," Ron continued, looking as pleased as he sounded. "I knew it wouldn't take much to snap you out of your funk."
"My funk?"
"Well, like you said, you've been a right git."
Harry sent Ron a dark look but Ron's happy grin vanquished it.
"So are you going to give Snape a second chance?"
Harry blinked with surprise at Ron who had asked. Did Ron want him to be with Snape? "Dunno," he said.
"Dumbledore believes everyone deserves a second chance," Hermione added.
Now Harry was suspicious. "Maybe I should give them both a second chance then."
Ron made a face. "Not Malfoy."
"Fair is fair," Harry said.
"You could just say 'to hell' with both of them," Ron considered. "I mean, you could still have anyone you wanted."
Harry smirked. He had told them both to 'go to hell' even if neither one of them understood at the time. But no matter how much he thought about what happened, what each man had done, he just couldn�t put the blame on anyone specific. They�d all been wrong in some way.
He was particularly confused about their childish actions. Lucius had had a bloody contract to keep Harry. That he would try to trap Harry into staying with him with an unplanned pregnancy was just --well, confusing. Lucius was a rational man, and though Harry could see the inherent Slytherin at work with his plans, he couldn�t reconcile the man�s claims of love, and his actions. Harry knew that Lucius could love, he saw it every time Draco was in the room. So why the subterfuge?
And Severus� Well Severus was more complicated. On the surface, Severus' cruel actions were no different than usual to the average bystander. But Harry knew better, and he also knew there had to be more to the story than Severus� explanation. To nobly let Harry go? No, that just didn't make sense. There had to be something more. Severus� own insecurities? Maybe.
There was no denying that he still cared for Severus. His heart just didn't want to let go, especially since he had heard Severus say the words - in front of someone else and not spoken when he thought Harry was sleeping.
And just recalling that Severus had said the words when he thought Harry was asleep and unaware gave credence to his sincerity. He would have to see what Severus did next.
"Still," Ron added. "Having two of the world's most powerful wizards fighting over you could be interesting."
Harry snorted over that. "Yeah," he said. "It could be deadly for one them, too." He hoped they hadn�t injured each other after he�d left. Well, not too badly anyway.
"So what are you going to do now?" Hermione spoke up.
"I'm still going to take those lessons from Bill and become a curse breaker," Harry told them. "Specializing in cursed items and such."
"What about your headaches?" she asked.
"You're still researching, right?"
"Of course."
"Well, I'll have to see what you guys turn up. In the mean-time, I'll invest in an antique business and hope they have a lot of cursed items for me to use," Harry said jokingly. "And with my new career, I should have plenty of stuff to use."
"Oh, about that," Hermione perked up again. "I heard Neville saying that he's found that he has some sort of knack for investing, and he was thinking of starting his own side business. I bet if you invest through him, it would really give his business a boost."
Harry smiled weakly. "Someone else using my fame for their own benefit."
"But, Harry," Hermione argued. "This is Neville."
Harry sighed. "True," he said, but he suddenly felt like he�d lost his support along with Lucius. He�d have to be careful and watch his back now that Lucius wasn�t there to do it for him.
"So what about your other problem?"
Harry looked at Hermione curiously. "What other problem?"
Her brows shot up as if he were being dense. "The potion?"
Ron looked as confused as Harry felt. "What?"
Hermione rolled her eyes. "For goodness sake. The pregnancy potion. Remember? The reason Harry was able to get out of his contract."
"I got out of the contract because I had sex with Snape."
"Okay," Hermione huffed and corrected herself, "The reason you had no penalties for breaching the contract." When Ron looked like he was going to interject, she turned on him. "If the magical contract didn't deem both breaches as equal, then someone would have had to pay a penalty of sorts." She turned back to Harry. "So?"
Harry blinked. "So, what?"
Hermione looked at the ceiling as if trying to find out why she bothered. "Honestly, Harry," she muttered. "What if you're pregnant?"
Harry blinked some more. In truth, he was trying not to think about it. He really didn't want to be a father right now. He had too many problems, the worst of which was having to feed on dark curses, and he just didn't want to deal with yet another. Although the thought of finally having something, someone, that was his, and his own personal family was tempting. Lucius had been bloody right about that one. Damned Slytherins.
"Well, then I'll deal with it then," Harry said, and then he changed the subject.
********
Harry continued to not think about the pregnancy possibility. In fact, he willed himself to forget about it, busying himself with other things. Taking Hermione's advice, he had contacted Neville. With his contract with Lucius void, any arrangements Lucius had made for Harry were also nullified. Thusly, he had told Neville to look into some investments for him and to also solicit a Property agent to find him either an antique shop or something of the like to purchase. Something akin to Borgin and Burkes would be perfect. Neville was thrilled to have Harry as a client and swore to do his best.
He moved back into his old flat in London, but decided it wouldn't do anymore. It didn't feel like home. He liked the building though with its somewhat dated architecture and its mixed residents. Mr. Peebles, the building owner, had always been rather nice too, so Harry brought his displeasure of his current flat to the man, and he had been very helpful, showing Harry several other flats that were available. Among them, Harry found one that suited him and moved right in.
The new flat was larger than his old one and more spacious in its living area. It was also on a corner, granting him a two-sided view through the windows. Since it had taken Harry all of about 20 minutes to unpack, he decided that he had to do something about his belongs, or lack there of. This would be his home now and as it was looking presently, it was rather spartan.

Pathetic, really.

Harry frowned and decided that there was no time like the present. Grabbing his cloak and his wand-

You can't go shopping looking like that.

Harry paused, knowing his inner voice wasn't referring to his clothes. Lucius had allowed him to keep all his clothes, and had sent them to Harry a couple of days after he'd left along with Saruman, who was currently lounging by the hearth. Since then, Lucius had been sending him gifts almost everyday. The first gift Lucius had thoughtfully sent was an item that had been cursed. Harry was able to verify that it was indeed cursed just by holding it in his hand. It had come with a long and emotional letter in which Lucius apologized for his actions, swearing they had been done with Harry's happiness in mind and practically begging Harry to forgive him and come back to the manor.
Even though it had only been five days, Harry couldn't help feeling disappointed that he hadn't heard from Severus.

Maybe he was lying again, just to get you away from Lucius.
His inner voice had a point, but that too, Harry pushed out of his mind. He was getting very tired of the emotional roller coaster he was forced to endure with Severus, and decided it was going to stop.
In the bathroom of his new flat, Harry cast a glamour over his face and considered his new appearance. Lightening his hair and darkening his eyes help to considerably change his features. Without his glasses, thanks to Severus' spell, and his scar, which he covered with Muggle make up, he appeared different enough that if no one was actually seeking him out, then they wouldn't give him a second glance. If he had any trouble at Gringotts then he would just add more to the glamour.
Harry didn't have any problems at the bank and soon found himself alone in Diagon Alley. Well, not alone. There were scores of happy shoppers wandering the street, free from the dark presence of Voldemort, and Harry watched them for a moment, recalling his first trip to the magical community with Hagrid. It seemed so long ago�
Shaking out of his reverie, he set off down the road, scanning the shops and stores for appropriate places to shop. About an hour later, he had a small bag in hand filled with shrunken items for his new home. He had purchased a couple of enchanted landscape paintings from Picture Perfect, and some knick knacks and household supplies from various street vendors as well as some books from Obscurus Books for a bookshelf, which he still had yet to purchase. He had to admit with his glamour in place, it was a lot easier and a whole lot more fun spending his money.
Harry hadn't even minded running into Grant Montgomery at the Three Broomsticks. They shared a table in the crowded establishment, and while he had no idea if Grant knew it was him or not, Harry had found the man's innocuous flirting charming today. As they left at the same time, Harry was about to ask if Grant knew where wizards went to by furniture, but Grant had obviously seen something down the block that spooked him and he begged off.
Harry watched the other man stride away and sighed. It was nice having company for a little while anyway. Glancing around, he spotted a store across the street. 'Gregor's, Fine Furnishing for the Family,' the sign read, and elated, Harry jauntily crossed the street.
******

Is that Harry?

Severus paused outside the door of Flourish and Blott's and studied the wizard crossing the street. It was indeed his Harry. True, at first glance you wouldn't recognize him as Famous Harry Potter, but his face and his form was still attractive enough to garner a second look.

Not that Harry would think of that.

Which was perfectly true. Harry probably thought his disguise was brilliant. Severus, however, was lucky enough to know the line of Harry�s physique like the back of his own hand, and he recognized it immediately.

Harry always did put too much faith in his own brilliance.

Although Harry probably didn't notice the sighs and the appreciative glances of the witches and wizards he passed, the disguise itself was good enough that the casual observer would see only an attractive young man, and not The Boy Who Lived.

Attractive? I thought we were going to work on your adjectives?

Severus stealthily followed Harry into the furniture and casually browsed the store as he watched Harry look around.
"Can I help you, sir?"
"Yes. I need some furniture."
"You've come to the right place. What do you need?"
Harry pulled out a list. "I'm looking for a bookshelf, some chairs and maybe a sofa with side tables, a dining set and a bedroom set. Oh, and I could use some hearth supplies."

He's setting up housekeeping. Which means he doesn't plan to go back to the manor.

It was a pricey list and the man blinked at Harry, and then looked him over as if judging whether or not Harry had the money for the purchases. Harry's clothes alone were all of good quality-

Bloody Lucius.

And he already had a shopping bag in his hand. Harry rolled his eyes as if sensing the man's hesitancy and dug out his sack of money. Once the man saw the size of Harry's purse, his eyes widened and his demeanor changed.
"My name is Nigel, and I'd be happy to help you find the perfect furniture for your home. Let us start over here." The man waved a hand and directed Harry towards some cozy chairs set up in front of a mock fireplace.
Harry inclined his head and followed him across the show room.
Nigel, as it were, was asking Harry about his preferences on style and function and Harry began to look more confused at every question. With a grin, Severus decided to act on Harry's behalf.
"Why don't you trying sitting down on one," Severus said, stepping up to them.
Harry and the salesman both swung around, suitably startled.
"Sev- um - Professor Snape," Harry said. "What are you doing here?"
Severus lifted one brow. "What does one do in an establishment such as this?"
Harry blinked. "You're looking for furniture?"
"As astute as always," Severus countered.

I noticed that you didn't actually say 'yes.'

Nigel looked a bit confused. "Are you together?"
Severus rescued Harry from having to answer that. "We are acquainted, and I noticed his discomfort with your bombardment of choices, so I decided to assist," Severus said. He looked at Harry, "With your permission, of course."
Harry blinked at him, looking adorably taken aback. Then his mask was back. "You want to help me?"
"If you will permit me."
He smiled then and Severus heart felt ten times lighter than it had that morning. "So which one do you like?"
"It isn't about me," Severus said. "I recommend that you do what I first suggested, and sit down."
Suddenly, Harry's face lit with dawning and he moved from chair to chair, trying them out. Finally, he settled on one but didn't like the coloring. Severus had to agree, the upholstery was far too flowery.
"Can I get it in a different pattern? And maybe in red?"
"Red?" Severus said, appalled.
"I suppose you think it would be better in green?" Harry challenged.
"Hardly, I just don't think surrounding yourself in Gryffindor colors is conducive to the feelings of relaxation associated with home and hearth."
"Maybe I do," Harry replied. "And you don't even know what my flat looks like."
Severus sighed, pulled out his wand and changed the chair's upholstery to resemble what Harry was suggesting. As he expected, Harry made a face, as did the salesman.
"Okay," Harry muttered. "Maybe, it is a little tacky. What do you suggest?"
Severus smugly returned the chair to its former state and turned to Nigel. "Perhaps you could show us what you have available for this model."
"Certainly." Nigel waved his own wand and projected all the different styles the store had of that particular chair. Harry picked out a traditional design in earth tones and bought two. Then he chose a solid covered sofa to match and end tables to accent the set, all based on Severus� recommendations.
The other items were chosen without too much ado, but when they came to the bedroom furnishings, Harry was adamant about getting the largest bed they had.
"I thought this was for your flat?" Severus inquired.
"It is," Harry said curiously.
"Is there adequate space to accommodate these pieces?"
Harry looked at him with a smirk. "I am a wizard, Professor," he reminded. "I can make it fit."
Severus couldn't help chuckling. "All right, Pot- er - Harry," Severus corrected in deference to Harry's disguise. "Was there anything else you required?"
Harry consulted his list and looked at the salesman hesitantly. "I don't suppose you have carpeting?"
Nigel appeared puzzled.
"Rugs, my good man," Severus translated.
The man beamed. "Oh, yes. We have the finest selection of Persian rugs in Britain as well as other quality floor coverings."
"Very well, show us," Severus bade.
An hour and a heated debate over the benefits of 'tassels' later, Harry had several rugs to add to his list of purchases. While Nigel prepared Harry's treasures for transport, Harry took care of the bill. With the extent of the sale, the owner of the establishment was called over to handle the transaction. Harry didn't have enough cash on him and Mr. Gregor looked very put out until Harry pulled out a Gringotts bank draft and signed his name. Then he looked outraged.
"I have personally seen Harry Potter, sir," Gregor said indignantly. "My daughter was a year ahead of him at Hogwarts. To dare to pretend-"
"He's wearing a disguise, you idiot," Severus growled. "Do you think Harry Potter could spend the day shopping in Diagon Alley without getting mobbed without using a glamour?"
The proprietor looked skeptical and Harry sighed. With a wave of his hand, the glamour was removed. "Can I borrow your handkerchief, Severus?" Severus scowled but relented. A quick rub with it over his forehead and the scar was visible again.
Mr. Gregor quickly changed his tune.
Nigel came back and was flustered at Harry's new appearance until he apparently put together all the clues. He presented Harry with several shopping bags containing his purchases.
"It is customary to tip your salesman," Severus whispered in Harry's ear.
"Doesn't he work on commission?" Harry whispered back, ignoring the tremor down his spine.
"Yes, but he was helpful and not too intolerable," Severus reasoned.
"Once you joined us," Harry put in.
"Regardless�"
"True, although you didn't intimidate him as much as you could have."
Severus smirked. "Brat," he muttered.
Harry just grinned and handed the man a fistful of galleons. "Thank you for all your help, Nigel."
Nigel stammered a bit pathetically and Gregor dismissed him. "I could have that delivered if you prefer, Mister Potter."
"No, I can handle it," Harry said, arranging the bags.
"Allow me," Severus said, picking up one. Harry smiled again and turned to leave but stopped abruptly.
"What is it?"
"I can't go out there like this." He put the bags down and prepared to reapply the glamour, which Severus was glad to see wasn't hiding any exhausted or agonized features.
"You could simply Apparate home," Severus suggested. "Unless you have more shopping to do."
"No. I'm finished for today," Harry said. "Would you like to come? I mean, help me bring the bags home?"

YES!

Severus inclined his head. "I did offer."
Harry nodded and offered Severus his elbow. Severus laid a hand over the proffered arm and they Disapparated with a pop.

He never noticed that you didn't buy anything.

*********
They reappeared in Harry's nearly empty living room and Harry immediately stepped away from Severus. He wasn't sure if it was a good idea bringing him home, but his company had been so much fun and stimulating that he wasn't ready to part with it yet.
He hadn't felt so relaxed in months.

Wonder why that is?

Severus was looking around his flat curiously and Harry had to remind himself that nothing was settled between them. He wanted to walk over and pull Severus into his arms and thank him properly for all his help that afternoon, but he couldn't.
"You have warded, of course," Severus said, continuing his slow trek around the room.
"Of course," Harry lied effortlessly, while inside he was cursing himself for not even thinking of doing it.
Severus nodded and turned to him. "Shall we unpack?"
"Um sure," Harry said, and only then noticed that Severus didn't have any of his own packages. He scowled. "You didn't buy anything," he accused.
With a shrug, Severus placed a bag on the one table in the room. "Is this real or transfigured?" he asked off the table.
"Transfigured," Harry replied. "It was an ink well. So what were you doing at the store?"
"I was just leaving Flourish and Blott's and I saw you enter."
"So you followed me?"
"Yes."
Harry felt a little thrill move over him. "Why?"
Severus looked up from unwrapping the furniture. "Because I wanted to see you, talk to you."
Despite the thrill, Harry still felt defensive. "And you just assumed I'd want to see you, talk to you?"
Severus sighed. "I did ask," he said with a smirk. "I assumed you would have said no when I offered my assistance earlier if you weren't receptive to my company."
Harry opened his mouth but closed it again. He really didn't want to fight, nor did he want to dredge up their old argument. Approaching the table, Harry saw that Severus had unwrapped several pieces and set them up in a model version of a tiny room - like a dollhouse.
He reached over a moved a piece. "I was going to put my desk there."
Severus looked at him. "You didn't purchase a desk," he pointed out. "Do you already have one? He scanned the barren flat and turned a smirk back to Harry.
"Damn," Harry muttered. "Now I have to go back."
Severus laughed softly and pulled another piece out of the bag. Harry picked up a chair and moved across the room to put it down in its place.
"What are doing?"
"I'm setting up. What's it look like?"
Severus smirked at him. "It's customary to put the rugs down first," he said smugly as he indicated several rolls of miniature fabric tied up on the table. Harry felt his face heat up as he brought the chair back to the table.
"I guess you're right," Harry said with a sigh. "I'm an idiot."
Harry's chin was brought up sharply. "You are not an idiot," Severus said. "How many homes have you furnished?"
Harry didn't even try to pull away. Looking up into Severus face, feeling his touch was too familiar, too wonderful. "None," he replied a little breathlessly.
Severus let go and turned back to the bag. "Ignorance is not the same as stupidity, Mr. Potter."
Harry cursed his hormones and started unrolling the rugs to find the one he had in mind for that room. Severus reached over and touched one.
"I like that one."
Harry nodded. "Me too," he said. "I was going to put that in," he looked up and found Severus eyes on his face, "in - um - the bedroom."
Severus nodded slightly. "Good choice."
Their eyes met and held and Harry couldn't help it. He leaned forward and Severus didn't move away. He touched his lips softly to Severus' with just the slightest pressure.
"What was that for?"
Harry opened his eyes and pulled away, returning his attention to the rugs. Picking one up, he moved to the fireplace and laid it down in front of it.
"Just to say thank you," he said. "For helping me today." Harry waved a hand and rug returned to its original size. He shifted it to the left a little and then returned to the table. Severus hadn't moved.
"Harry." Harry closed his eyes, dreading what would come next. "I know I hurt you."
Harry let out his breath and opened his eyes to look at Severus. "Was it all lies?"
Severus shook his head slowly. "Only the part," he cleared his throat. "At the end." He moved to Harry and placed a palm on his cheek. "Do you think I could fake that - everything else?"
"You are a master at deception."
"I am because I've had to be and I've had to use it. But I don't have to use it with you anymore. I know what I want now."
"I don't know what I want anymore. I can't trust anyone."
"You used to trust me." Harry nodded silently and Severus continued, "I�m still the same person. I�ve done some foolish things, but perhaps one day you could love me again?"
Harry had never stopped, but he couldn't tell Severus that.
This time Severus leaned down and pressed his mouth to Harry's lips. Harry responded instantly, pressing himself to Severus' body and wrapping his arms around his neck. The kiss intensified as Severus bent Harry backward, devouring his mouth with his probing tongue while his hands roamed Harry's back.
Harry reveled in the taste of Severus' kisses, the feel of his hair only slightly greasy in his fingers. He wanted more. Moving his hands to Severus' chest, he began on the buttons. Severus' mouth stopped him. His lips and teeth closed around that spot on Harry's neck and Harry's knees grew weak. Severus had a good hold of him though, and held him firmly against his own body.
"Where's the bedroom?" Severus said against the crook of his neck and shoulder. Harry jerked his head, hoping Severus understood.
He did as they maneuver through the hall, bumping into the walls as they awkwardly removed each other's clothing - or rather Harry's. Harry was still working on the buttons by the time Severus got to Harry's pants.
"We have to get you some easy access clothing," Harry murmured, finally finding some skin at Severus' collar. He sucked and bit down, causing Severus to groan. In turn, Severus' hands were stroking and caressing Harry's chest and sides, urging Harry to hurry.
Finally in the stark bedroom containing little but the bed and Harry's trunk, Harry gave up the fight and wandlessly banished Severus' clothing to the floor. A quick shove from Harry put Severus on his back across the small bed and Harry dropped to his knees, taking the large cock into his mouth.
Severus gasped for breath. "Merlin, Harry," he breathed. "I won't last long, if you do that."
Harry pulled off, but moved his attention to kiss and lick Severus' heavy sack and around the coarse hairline. He continued to work his mouth slowly up Severus' body, paying tribute to every scar and every imperfection of the pale skin. By the time his lips moved to suckle on one hard nipple, Severus had a death grip on the bedcovers and was making incoherent sounds.
This was what Harry had always wanted. Having his evil way with Severus Snape, playing his body as Severus had always played his own. And Severus was letting him. Harry continued to kiss and taste up Severus' throat, around his jaw and across his face, loving the feel of Severus' body writhing beneath his and the needy groans and moans that escaped his lips.
It was perfect, and Harry didn't want to mess it up. Laying his body down fully on Severus', Harry buried his fingers in the dark hair, relinquishing his leverage.
****
Severus felt Harry's skin rubbing against his own as their lips met again. The exquisite torture over, Severus rolled them over, continuing to ravish Harry's mouth. He thought he would expire from pleasure and expend himself prematurely, but he restrained himself, allowing Harry his exploration.
Well past the point where he could enjoy his own leisurely exploration of Harry's body, Severus used a spell to prepare his lover. Harry's hands were still moving all over him and it was only with monumental control that his entrance into the tight heat was slow and steady. Once sheathed, he paused, his skin dripping with his restraint as he let Harry adjust.
"Severus."
The soft whisper drew his eyes to Harry's face. Harry's eyes were softly glowing with desire and his passion-ravaged lips were parted and inviting. The sight, one he'd thought he'd only ever again have in his memories, arrested his heart but steadied his resolve.
"You feel wonderful," Harry continued, lifting his legs to embrace Severus' hips. "It would be more wonderful if you moved now."
Severus snorted and leaned his forehead down on Harry's shoulder. "Insolence," Severus tried to growl. He wasn't sure how it came out. Pulling half way out, he thrust back in with a jerk.
Harry arched, his head thrown back. "Yes, sir," he rasped.
Again, he pulled out only to drive back in. Holding Harry's hips, Severus continued to plunge into Harry's welcoming flesh, finding new and different angles to torment and pleasure with. Harry's body was bowed and his expression became pained as if just waiting for the push that would send him over the edge.
Reaching between them, Severus took hold of Harry's cock and gave Harry the prod he needed. With a shout, Harry came and Severus was able to let go his control and pound into the willing flesh until his own release gripped him.
Slowly coming down from climax, Severus gathered Harry's spent body close and tightened his arms around him. He kissed Harry's sweat soaked temple and ran his hand down the satiny skin of his back. Merlin, he was perfect.
After a few minutes of silent recovery, Harry sighed heavily and pulled out of Severus' arms. "Um, sorry, but�I have to ask you to leave."
Severus hid his surprise and lifted a brow.
"I'm sorry," Harry said. "I can't - I mean, I'm just not ready to share my bed right now."

Give him time.

Harry didn't look as if he was being spiteful or vengeful. In fact, he looked a little embarrassed. Severus had a lot to atone for.

You didn't think it was going to be easy, did you?

Severus sighed and nodded. "It's most understandable, Harry," he said, dropping a quick kiss on Harry's head. Several muscles protested when he sat up, and Severus groaned as he pushed himself to his feet and stretched. "We should have unpacked the bed first," he said. "This one should have been burned long ago."
Harry looked pleased that Severus understood and hadn't made a fuss. "Didn't think of that, now did we?"
"Bloody teenagers," Severus muttered as he pulled on his clothes. "Always in such a rush."
Harry laughed.
Once fully dressed, Severus leaned over the bed and kissed Harry soundly on the mouth. "Would you care to join me for dinner tomorrow night?"
Harry frowned suspiciously. "Where?"
"Anywhere you'd like to go."
"You'd go out in public with me?"
Severus snorted at his surprise, then frowned himself. "Yes. Why? Are you ashamed to be seen in public with me?"
"Not at all," Harry said quickly. "I just thought you wouldn't want to."

What a pair you two are.

Severus kissed him again. "You could always wear that glamour again if you're concerned with being recognized, but either way�" He waved a hand dismissively.
Harry smiled again. "Alright. When?"
"I'll pick you up at seven o�clock."
Snuggling back into his pillow, Harry sighed. "It's a date."
Severus scowled as he swung his cloak around his shoulders. "Mr. Potter, I do not date."
"You do now."
"Impudent brat."
Harry laughed again.
As Harry was in such a good mood, Severus was tempted to ask him about the pregnancy. He didn't want to press, however, and Harry didn't appear to be showing any signs of it.

Oh, and how many pregnant men have you known?

"I will see you tomorrow then."
Harry nodded and snuggled further into his bed.
"Oh, and Mr. Potter." Green eyes opened. "When I get here tomorrow, I expect this flat to be fully warded."
Harry turned a lovely shade of red and pulled the covers over his head.
************
Harry peeked over the bedcover as Severus left. He couldn't help his smile. His Severus was a crafty one. While Lucius used his money and charm, with gifts and sweet words, Severus used his presence, as ornery as it was sometimes, to remind Harry how much he enjoyed Severus' company.

Of course, the sex is good too.

Harry had to agree. And there was no post intimacy headache either.

Makes you wonder.

And it did. Maybe it was time to mention that little fact to Hermione after all.
******
Severus turned down the alley beside Harry's building and Apparated outside Hogwarts' gates. It had been a good day. Even if Harry wasn't ready to resume the intimacy of the afterglow time together, he had still opened himself up to Severus. Harry had allowed Severus to spend time with him, advise him in his purchases, and had allowed Severus into his 'home'.

The sex was good, too.

Of course, their physical attraction had always been very strong, but it was the other things, the more important ones, that Severus needed to get back. Severus had Harry's companionship again and a semblance of his affection, and he�d be damned if he let Harry get away from him this time.
He knew it he would have to work hard to regain Harry�s trust and devotion. However, Severus would do whatever it took to have Harry�s love once more. And then he would hold onto it and keep it forever.

To Be Continued in To Have and To Keep.
- 10
- 11
You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.
Report Story

To Have Not