Adult-FanFiction.org : Harry Potter

Here But For the Grace of Merlin	By : makochan0217 Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Harry/Draco Views: 21620 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 13
Disclaimer: Harry Potter is owned by J.K. Rowling. We make nothing from this piece of fanfiction, and suing would be pointless, unless you like lint and bad skin!

Chapter List
- 10
- 11
- 12
Warnings: Angst, OOC, DH spoilers (minus Epilogue), language, violence, self-harm, drinking, slash, smut, non-con, BDSM

Disclaimer: Harry Potter is owned by J.K. Rowling, Scholastic Publishing, and Warner Bros and some other stupid companies. I make nothing from this piece of fanfiction, and suing would be pointless, unless you like lint and bad skin!

Author’s Notes: Thanks go to my reviewers! You guys rock! Ice Mice and Licorice Whips for Jamie, especially, for helping me get out of my stupid writer’s block. (A note to MightyGryffindor on ff.net: yes, I’m aware that Harry only survived the Killing Curse once. However, most people in the Potterverse believe that he has survived it twice. Only Harry, Voldemort, Dumbledore and Snape know that Harry was a Horcrux, created at the first attempt to kill him. However, how much stress would Harry’s body suffer from finally expelling that and returning from his semi-dead state?)

Chapter Eleven – Coming Home?

Draco sighed heavily as Granger stopped him from leaving the room. Really, the girl was perhaps the most annoying female he’d ever met sometimes, and that was saying something, considering he’d been friends with Pansy Parkinson since they were children. However, he knew that he’d have to get along with her, if not for his plans to make the Malfoy name mean something again, then because she was Harry’s best friend and a rather competent witch. That didn’t mean he had to enjoy being interrogated, did it?

Turning around, he looked at the room’s occupants with a sharp eye. Potter was giving him a small smile, but his eyes were sweeping up and down his body with a critical eye. ‘What is he finding so bloody wrong with me today? Did I not just save him from inferior brewing and a rather annoying sycophant of a Healer?’ Granger, for her part, was looking at him with an expectant air. And, she was still holding Potter’s hand like he belonged to her. That, out of everything that had happened that morning, irked him.

“What is it that you cannot live without knowing, Granger?” he sneered. She rewarded him with a hard look that made her surprisingly pretty face (and when had that happened?) appear very Slytherin-like.

“First of all, since when are you and Harry so friendly?” she asked. “The last time I checked, you tried to hand him over to the Dark Lord. You barely looked at him when he saved your skinny arse from a sentence in Azkaban, not to mention your parents.”

“’Mione,” Potter said, squeezing the girl’s hand and her turning attention to the black-haired teen. “Don’t be so nasty to Draco. He’s been kinda pleasant since his father was admitted.”

“And what’s that about anyway?” she queried. “I thought your father was rather… close… with the other Death Eaters. Why would they want to attack your family?”

Draco sighed and leaned against the wall near the door, looking out into the hallway and wondering if he could escape and be Granger-free soon. “Out of all the families following the Dark Lord, mine is the only one whose fortune wasn’t seized by the Ministry or fled the country. Needless to say, without funds, the loose Death Eaters cannot escape England to avoid Azkaban.”

“So, they attacked your family in the hopes of what? Coercing you into giving them money?”

“Precisely,” Draco answered, looking up at Potter through the few locks of white-blond hair that had slipped from its normal style. “However, my father no longer controls the family fortune, and I am actually Head of the Malfoy family now.”

“Oh,” she breathed, looking to see if Potter was going to react. The former Gryffindor only continued to study Draco, still wearing that stupid smile, but his eyes had softened and he appeared completely at ease. “So, why did you offer to let Harry stay with you?”

“I didn’t,” Draco said, using a hand to brush his mutinous hair out of his eyes. “My mother is quite fond of Harry. She evidently planned to ask him to stay with us after she talked to Healer Sharpe the day she ran into you, Granger. As I can be in the same room with him without wanting to hex him,” he smiled briefly at the other man, “I didn’t disagree.”

“What’s in it for you?” she snapped. “You don’t do anything without some benefit to yourself.”

Draco took the opportunity to study his former rival and said rival’s best friend closely. Potter appeared just as anxious to hear his answer as the girl. Granger, however, was staring at him like she used to in school, like she was debating to let him talk or hit him. He rather hoped that she would control herself. He didn’t relish being hit again. She had a mean right hook, if he understood the phraseology correctly. He was on the verge of answering her extremely impertinent, if not accurate, question before Potter took the opportunity away.

“’Mione, Narcissa was very gracious in extending the invitation,” he said. However, she cut across him.

“I don’t doubt that Narcissa Malfoy was the picture perfect of pureblood breeding,” she sneered – a very unflattering look for her, Draco thought. “That’s not what I asked. Malfoy doesn’t do anything unless there’s something in it for him.” She paused, a thoughtful expression on her face. “Except for…”

Draco waited, feeling rather amused at the way Potter handled the girl. Instead of yelling at her to shut up and mind her own bloody business as he might have with anyone else, he let her think out things and say what she wanted. It was rather ingenious. And effective.

“Well, there was that time he didn’t turn you in at the Manor,” she whispered. Her healthy, tanned face paled, no doubt thinking about her own time at the hands of his psychotic aunt. “And why didn’t you? That would have set your family for life with the Dark Lord!”

“Granger, you’ve seen that insane, disgusting man, yes?” She nodded tightly. “Imagine living in the same house as him? Even at Hogwarts, I couldn’t avoid being called back to the Manor for other things. Severus even allowed me to Floo right from his office to go back so I could follow that idiot’s orders.” She paled further, and Draco continued his point, “I didn’t want him to win. Potter, Weasley and you were important for his downfall, am I right?” She nodded again. “Then you should rather stop looking a gift-horse in the mouth.”

“Yes, well, I’m just wondering if this is a case of Greeks bearing gifts,” she replied stubbornly, getting some of her coloring back. Really, the girl was too bloody smart to be with someone like Weasel. He was never going to appreciate her wit and dry humor. For the first time in months, Draco regretted that Blaise was in France. Even for a Mudblood, Granger would have stood a chance in with someone who truly appreciated her.

Eschewing that train of thought, Draco continued, yet again, “What is in this arrangement for me?” He looked over at Potter, who began to blush rather prettily. “Aside from actually having Potter around me without the constant worry of hexing, it will make my mother happy.”

“And that’s all?” she asked, dark eyes hard.

He shrugged. “I cannot say that that is all that might occur,” he drawled, basking in the discomfort of his former rival. ‘It certainly isn’t all that I’m hoping to occur.’

She snorted, folding her arms across her chest. “Yes, that’s all well and good,” she sneered, looking at her friend critically. She seemed to find something that alarmed her, however, and she drew back as if struck. “Harry? That’s why?”

Potter’s jaw locked stubbornly, and his face shut down in a moment of pique that Draco thought well deserved. “What?” he growled. “Do you have something to say about that, Hermione?”

“Oh, Harry, that’s not what I meant,” she huffed. “It’s just, well, unexpected, I suppose.” She turned dark eyes on Draco, showing that they were uncharacteristically bright. “Malfoy, would you mind terribly if we spoke privately for a moment?”

Draco raised one eyebrow and thought about refusing her request, but he knew that Potter – no, Harry – would want to speak to the girl. And if this kept her close to the Chosen One, in spite of her careless words, he’d allow it. He still needed her help, after all. Once everything was resolved, then he could force the issue with Harry.

He nodded regally and turned to head out into the hallway. “Harry, I will go check on my father and remain in the waiting room until you are ready to leave.” He didn’t wait for a response and went to gather his thoughts.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Harry waited for Hermione to continue speaking once Draco left the hospital room, but she seemed to be lost in thought. As time seemed to drag on and the silence grew uncomfortable, he shifted in his bed and turned to face her totally. “You might as well say what it is that’s bothering you, ‘Mione.”

“Hm,” she muttered, brown eyes clearing from her thoughts. “I… just… Harry, your love life is just that. I respect that decision, and I’ve never hounded you about your relationships. But, are you sure? It’s Malfoy,” she whispered. “And, well, you’re you.”

The wizard sighed as he reclined to the side and rested his head against the well-cushioned pillow. “I know that he’s Malfoy and I’m me. It’s very hard to miss those simple facts.”

“Yes, but this would… I always thought that…” Harry wanted to laugh at the way his friend was stumbling over her words. She was usually so verbose that this awkwardness was endearing and soothing to his frayed nerves. “Well, if you dated – and I use that term loosely, mind – Malfoy, it would be difficult to have a family in the conventional way, and I was under the impression that that was what you wanted more than anything in the world.”

“I suppose, but that’s not really important,” he answered truthfully. “At least, it’s not right now. I’m just… tired, ‘Mione. I’m tired and I’m lonely and… I feel like the only one who really understands me is you, but that Malfoy – Draco – might comprehend things just as well.” He smiled as he remembered the way the blond has rescued him from those annoying reporters.

“Oh, Harry,” she groaned, taking his hand with a sigh. “I know why you left the Burrow, but did you really need to push all of the Weasleys away when you left?”

“I didn’t mean for it to be so long,” he admitted. “Ginny kept giving me those expectant looks, and George was always so sad. Ron… I don’t know. He was just angry and kept snapping at me. Molly and Arthur cried a lot. And Percy… Well, Percy kept shooting looks at me as if he was waiting for me to turn into the next Dark Lord and enslave the rest of the family. I felt like everything was caving in around me. I was beginning to hyperventilate all the time. I was having panic attacks. Ron was telling me that I was being selfish and overreacting. That I hadn’t lost anywhere near as much as his family had, so I should just suck it up and get my act together. Some rot like that.

“That’s why I left. And once I was gone, it was just easier to stay away, especially the longer I stayed drunk. It was nice to just not feel anything for a while, you know?”

“I can understand how that would be seductive,” she answered, patting his hand reassuringly. “I’m sure that’s how everyone feels when they fall into the way of drugs and alcohol.”

“Yeah,” he said listlessly. “I got all their letters, but I just couldn’t take it. I started sending them back, unopened, hoping they’d leave me alone.” He tried to smile at her, but he knew it was a grimace of discomfort. “And the more alone I felt, the angrier I got. I… I didn’t know how to really reach out, I guess.”

“It’s not surprising, considering the way your family treated you growing up.” He made a noncommittal sound as he watched her think. “You should have written me, Harry.”

“I didn’t want to bother you, ‘Mione. You were trying to have some family time with your parents. I knew you deserved it after a year on the run. Besides, it was Australia. Isn’t that what one does after they reach their majority and have been freed from school?”

She snorted inelegantly. “I suppose so, but very few go walk-about, you know.”

“What can I say? I’m Harry Potter. I have to be different, I guess.”

“So, how long have you fancied Malfoy then?” She just barely managed to say his surname without frowning and Harry appreciated the effort. He seriously doubted he’d get much from Ron, once he found out.

“I don’t know when it first started, really,” he whispered, trying desperately not to blush. “He’s always been there. Even when we weren’t at Hogwarts after… the tower… I kept seeing him in my visions.”

“You never told me about that,” she said quietly. “And… seeing him like that made him look more human?”

“I guess what started that was the night with Dumbledore. He was scared and helpless. I’d never really seen Draco like that.” He smiled briefly. “I mean, I remember that detention in the Forbidden Forest the first year.” He chuckled darkly. “God, he was such a prat.”

“Well, it’s good to see that you don’t think he’s perfect just because you want to shag him.”

“Merlin forbid,” Harry joked. “Draco and I have a lot of history, yeah, but I don’t think either of us is ever going to be perfect. There’s too much. We’d have to be under Amortentia to be so blind.”

“You’re looking at this whole thing rather maturely, Harry,” Hermione said, pushing a few strands of her bushy hair behind her ears. “I’m glad about that.” She sighed. “You know, Ron didn’t tell me that he said all that to you. And you didn’t tell me the last time we talked either.”

“He’s a stubborn, selfish, jealous prat sometimes, ‘Mione, and I was tired of taking his shit because he’s got an inferiority complex over his self-worth. He helped me defeat the most insane, evil wizard in over a century. You’d think he’d take his share in the glory and let me mourn the loss of the last connection to my parents I had.”

“Oh, Harry,” she said, tears welling up in her brown eyes.

“Don’t, ‘Mione. Please, don’t. I… just…” He turned his head into his pillow and breathed in the clean scent of lavender that the hospital seemed to use in all its linens. “It’s happened before, and it’ll happen again, I think. Eventually, I’ll forgive him, if he asks for it, but I just don’t want to talk about this right now.”

“You’ll have to talk to someone-”

“I don’t want to talk about it!” As soon as he was done yelling, he regretted it. Hermione was the only person who’d stood beside him since he saved her from the troll in first year. “I’m so sorry, ‘Mione.”

She stared at him as if he was some sort of stranger. “And that’s what everyone’s been seeing from you?”

He shrugged, blushing horribly in embarrassment. “I… Yeah, sometimes worse.”

His best friend nodded sadly. “Harry, as much as it pains me to say this, I think that staying with Malfoy and his family might do you some good. You can yell and fight with them all you want, and Malfoy, at least, gives as good as he gets. You won’t have to bite your tongue.”

“That has got to be the worst reason I’ve ever heard for your approval for one of my plans,” he said with a genuine laugh. “But thanks all the same.”

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Narcissa didn’t know what she expected when Draco had sent word with his personal house-elf that he was returning to the Manor with Harry. Certainly not that he would bring Miss Granger along with them. However, looking back, she should have seen it coming. Since the Muggleborn witch was back in Britain, it wasn’t surprising that she would want to protect her best friend. Especially when he was entering the lair of a family of former Death Eaters.

“Why, Draco, darling, what a pleasant surprise,” she said coolly, coming down the vast staircase to greet her son and their guests. “You didn’t tell me that you would be bringing Miss Granger along with you when you and Harry came. What a naughty son you are.”

‘At least he has the decency to blush in embarrassment,’ she thought before watching the two Gryffindors. It was the blush on the black-haired boy that made up her mind. ‘Ah, well, that would explain a few fair details then.’

“Mother, I apologize for not telling you,” Draco said. While he would sound cold and black to everyone, she, as his very fond mother, could hear the contriteness in his tone. “She insisted on being here when Harry joined us.”

“Yes, I believe she would have.” She gave the young woman a faint smile. “Miss Granger, what a delightful surprise for you to come visit me here at the Manor.” She watched as the Gryffindors exchanged silent looks and had to bite back a delighted chuckle. Oh, but how cute they seemed to be when they were playing into her hands.

“Thank you, Mrs. Malfoy,” the girl said hesitantly. “I didn’t mean to intrude, but I wanted to make sure that Harry would be comfortable here at the Manor.” She was looking all around, tightly wound up, no doubt looking for Bellatrix and Greyback to jump out at any second.

“Miss Granger, I assure you that the four of us are the only people who are currently in the Manor,” Narcissa said, taking one hand to rest on the shoulder of her twitchy guest. “My son suffers so few people here, that I would be surprised if you even find many house-elves staying after this next week.”

The girl seemed to perk up and gain color in her cheeks. Narcissa did not miss the low groan from Harry as he attempted to get away from his friend, muttering something about spewing or some such thing.

“’Mione, not now,” he mumbled. “’M too tired to deal with house-elf rights right now. Can it wait until the third or fourth visit?”

‘Ah, yes, I remember Draco telling me something about her crusade for house-elves,’ the tall blond woman thought merrily. “Darling, why don’t you show Harry to his room? I’m sure that he would like to lie down after being released.”

“Of course, Mother,” he answered obediently as if he was still her perfect child instead of the Lord of the Manor. “This way, Harry,” he said gently as he took the other boy’s arm. “I believe I know just what room Mother has put you in for your stay.”

‘I’m sure you do, my Dragon,’ she thought as she watched the two boys walk carefully. For all of the Gryffindor’s apparent health and strength the night before, he seemed to have flagged almost as soon as she saw him. ‘I wonder if that is sign a that he needs to see a Mind-Healer, or if it is just an overall symptom? I shall have Jacobi come in the morning to examine him.’ She turned cool blue eyes to the other woman. “Now, Miss Granger, what can I do for you?”

TBC

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Here But For the Grace of Merlin