Rules Were Made to be Broken

AN: Damn it – feeling in a particularly nasty, sarcastic mood tonight, yet I’m up to a Hermione chapter… Oh, well, perhaps pent up Snapeishness (yes, that is a word!) will just have to brew for a few more days…


Thou Shalt Not Ask One’s Ex for Help (and expect to get it)


Neither Remus nor Severus…sorry, ‘Snape’ seem to notice me sneak away from their little display of their egos. It was kind of sweet. Of Remus I mean. However I did find it a little insulting – the two of them arguing over me like I wasn’t even there. I am perfectly capable of sticking up for my self. So why didn’t I?

Good question. Still pondering that myself as Remus and I make our way back to our quarters. Guess it all boils down to the bastard. I was not in the mood for a confrontation with him. Not really even willing to accept he exists. Why the hell did I ever agree to come back here? Starting to wonder if I don’t have a sadistic side myself.

As for That Bastard, well, how dare he! How bloody dare he! After all this time and after he fucking kicked me out he treats me like I was the one at fault. Like I wrenched his heart from his chest and trod all over it. Fuck him.

I am utterly determined to not spend another wasted moment thinking about That Bastard.

“It was nice to catch up with them all again, wasn’t it?” Remus grins at me as he opens our door.

“For the most part,” I reply, not meaning for the crispness in my voice to be present. Remus catches it still though.

“Forget about Severus, Herm. He’s just a bitter old man.” Way to go – mind is straight back to That Bastard.

Really should tell Remus. Really should confess my sordid little affair with said Bastard to him. Remus is, after all, my husband and I would like to think we have an open relationship. Something holds me back though. Something my mind is not willing to enter into just yet. Settle for it’s over and done – what’s the point stirring up more shit?

“More than happy to,” I reply, forcing myself to cheer up. This is a big castle and Severus is just one man – can’t be that hard to avoid him. Besides, past knowledge informs me that he likes to spend his time holed up in his dreary quarters anyway. Avoid the dungeons and I shall be sweet.

“That’s the attitude,” Remus replies, giving me a quick hug.


“Damn it!” I grab up the sheet of parchment before me, ball it tightly and throw it with force at the wall. I have been working on this Wolfsbane potion theory for nearly a week now and if it weren’t for the house elves Remus and I would be up to our ears in discarded notes by now. I know, I chose my bloody thesis topic, and did so out of hope that I could make the wizarding world a little more understanding towards Remus’ condition. Right now, however, I am ready to toss the whole lot aside and take on one of the many easier suggestions my Professor made. At the time I thought the man was just underestimating my capabilities – now am thinking he know me better than I know myself. Damn me and my ‘I can do anything I set my mind to’ attitude. This one has jumped up and bitten me right on the bum.

“Herm?” Remus’ voice is a little hesitant at the doorway to our study. He unfortunately knows all about my temper when I can’t understand something. Frustrates the living hell out of me. “It’s still not working?”

What sort of stupid bloody question is that? Never mind, he is trying to be understanding. Will not bite his head off.

“No,” I say sulkily instead. “No it’s not!” I am on the verge of tears now. Can see my whole doctorate slipping from my grasp, all that work, all that time and for what? A fortune in balled up parchment.

“Tried the library?”

“Yes.” Course I’ve tried the fucking library. At first it was nice to get myself reacquainted with my old safe haven, but having failed me I am a little less pleased with the place.

Remus watches me carefully for a few moments as I tug in frustration at my hair. Then, bless his soul, and comes over and wraps his arms around me. Everything is always better when Remus is there.

“I have one little suggestion,” Remus whispers in my ear. “You’re not going to like it, though.”

Gods, am at the end of my wick. Will try anything! “What?” I ask hopefully. Can’t be that bad. Can’t be any worse than the state I am currently in.

“Snape.”

I stiffen in Remus’ arms. I have spent the past week quite successfully avoiding That Bastard and am not about to go and drop myself in it now. No bloody way am I venturing down to the dungeons to ask That Bastard for help. No way!

“I’d rather end up a dishwasher!” There, that should get the point across. Remus is all too aware of my distaste for cleaning.

“Oh, come now, he’s not thad, Hd, Herm. You’ve just got to ignore his snarky attitude.”

If that was all it was I wouldn’t have a problem. Severus Snape does not scare me. Severus That Bastard Snape does.

Still, it would only take a moment. Could I live with throwing away my thesis because I couldn’t spend twenty seconds in the same room as That Bastard? Severus ruined enough of my life when I was younger; I hardly think it fair that he should be able to ruin my life now as well. Fuck He He is not going to do that to me. I get determinedly to my feet, grab up parchment and pen and head for the door.

“Thatta girl,” Remus grins at me. Bet he wouldn’t be saying that if he knew precisely who I was going to see. Remus is what one could call just a tad on the possessive side.

Knock very, very quietly on Snape’s office door. Not my fault if the man’s hearing isn’t so hot. I can then justify to myself that I did indeed try. No answer. Oh, what a shame.

Better do the same at his classroom door. Wouldn’t want to think I gave up too easily now, would I? Tiptoe across the hall and tap gently at that door as well. Okay, been here one second, plenty of time for him to answer me…

“What?” Damn. His harsh voice drifts through the closed door at me. With a heavy sigh, I push the door open, taking those brief moments to gather myself. Just forget it ever happened. Just forget it and all will be fine.

He’s sitting predictably at his desk. Ominous red ink tipped quill in his hand informs me that he is apparently marking Gryffindor papers. Good, that should catch him in a better mood. I stand there silently for a few seconds really not sure what to say.

Must have stood there too long, he’s looked up at me now. Really can’t read the expression on his face, but he seems to have a lapse in the vocabulary portion of his brain as well.

“May I help you?” Severus asks, raising on eyebrow at me.

Indeed. Quit your job and disappear off the planet – that would be a good start.

“Uh,” I stammer. Seem to be falling apart under his scrutinising gaze. Fuck him, fuck him, fuck him! “I am working on the theory of Wolfsbane potion and it’s variants for part of my thesis and have come to a little…mind block. Remus suggested I ask you for help.” There, see? I don’t want to talk to you either, Bastard.

An evil little smile curls at the corners of his lips. Shit, now what?

“Nice to see you haven’t been wasting your entire life, Miss Granger. However, I am sure there are more productive things you could be doing with your mind than scrutinising such a redundant potion.”

“Excuse me?!” I yell at him. Can’t help it – pent up anger has finally boiled over and is threatening to rip acidly at That Bastard before me. Bloody good place for it. “You know perfectly well how important that potion is!”

“Important to whom? Important to your precious husband? Forgive me, Miss Granger, but certainly can’t see the need for it myself.” He returns to his papers as if I am not even there. Bastard!

“Don’t you dare talk about Remus like that!” I am borderline hysterical now and don’t care.

“I will refer to your husband in the manner I see fitting.” He’s still not looking at me, his curtain of black hair hangs around his face blocking out my glare. I’m not a stupid little girl anymore, Severus. You have messed with the wrong woman. I stomp up to the front of the room and bend down over his desk so that he has no choice but to notice me. Then grasping ad fud full of his hair I pull his head up so we are almost nose to big nose.

“You listen to me you pathetic arse, if you dare say one more defamatory word about Remus in my presence you shall not live long enough to regret it!” I hiss at him. Think only you can play at the nasty threats, Severus?

Severus is staring right at me now, and I catch an odd glimmer in his dark eyes. Quickly I release his hair and pull my hand back. That look scares me and I don’t know why.

His hand is under my chin now and he is looking at me in the most scrutinising way. I am too scared to move yet I know I should. I should run from here and never come back.

Quite suddenly he presses his lips to mine in what under any other circumstances could be called a tender kiss. In my terror (and that is what it is – don’t even suggest anything else!) I cannot move. I am frozen to the spot, my hands still planted firmly on his desk. It isn’t until his tongue darts out and attempts to make its way between my lips that I regain control of my body. I jump back from the bastard, and he gives me a triumphant sneer. My hand comes up of it’s own accord and slaps him hard across the face.

“Bastard!”

Right, I really really have to study for my Maths exam on Friday, so updatey bey be a little less frequent over the next week, but I’ll still try to get a couple in… course pleading and grovelling doesn’t hurt…

Thank you’s and complimentary sarcastic comments to…

Shem – Ah, back in your first reviewing position! Was beginning to get worried there for a moment that perhaps you had discovered the real world ;) Don’t want to be here all by myself! Severus can own me anytime he wants… Thanks!

Kate – hm, someone else for Remus? That bares thinking about, but I have a feeling some of my other reviewer might just hang me for that! You’ll just have to wait and see!

Deb – Pissed?! Sev is bloody insane! Ah, Sweet Severus Torture – there is nothing more fun! Thank you!

Rilla – Poor Herm nothing! Poor Herm has two perfectly shagable wizards after her affections…if only to Herm for a day!

Gwennavierre – That is the last time Dag Nammit will work! I will not give in again! (Oh, maybe just once more…) Cheers! Oh, and read your fic and love it! Quite a story you’ve got there!

MaddyRiddle – hm, trying to persuade me to get the wolf and Herm together through not so subtle compliments? Love it! Keep em coming!

DharmasMomma – Cheers!

Loraine – Promise I will finish this one!

LilyMalfoy – Herm herself is going to feel a little like the meat in the sandwich soon (no inuendo to three-some intended here, then again…)

Tradilien – Another for Remus…goodness me, I’m going to have to take a poll soon! Thank you!

Lizski – Cheers!

Pinkyheather – I believe Severus would throw the perfect temper tantrum – one that could out do my 18 month old son! Thanks!

KdarkMaiden – Begging will get you everywhere, my dear. Next chapter is here as requested :)