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The Long Road	By : SinisterMe Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Snape/Remus Views: 63598 -:- Recommendations : 3 -:- Currently Reading : 18
Disclaimer: This is a work of fan fiction using characters from the Harry Potter world, which is trademarked by J. K. Rowling. This story is purely for entertainment purposes, no money is being made from it.

Chapter List
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Down in the lab, Snape found himself with only moments to spare. He wasted no time setting about the next step, raising the heat under the cauldron, preparing ingredients at near lightning speed so they would be ready before it was too late. The steam rolling off of the mixture began to take on a sour smell; he added the White Mountain cap mushrooms immediately, along with the camphor and vinegar that hadn’t been soaked up by the fungi.
Severus cast a bubble head charm on himself and fully opened the vent above the cauldron; this was where the fumes from the potion would become toxic. If he remained down here without those safeguards in place, it would take moments for him to be rendered unconscious, and later as the potion reduced and the fumes become more concentrated, he would die. Fortunately, he was not a complete idiot.
He let the potion bubble without stirring it. At the work bench he set up a medium sized burner, lighting the flame and adjusting the height with the turn of a small knob on the burner itself. He placed a metal stand over the burner, correcting the height of the flame one more time to make sure it would not be too hot. Severus then filled a narrow mouthed beaker with some of the potion that was currently brewing, careful to disturb the boiling liquid as little as possible. He set the beaker over the flame to maintain its temperature, turning to a row of bottles off to the side, selecting one with heavily tinted glass.
This bottle contained equal parts pure Acromantula venom and Nundu saliva. It was ridiculously expensive, for reasons that didn’t need all that much explanation, as the collection of those two items would be extremely difficult for the person (or people, more realistically) attempting to attain either of its components. The process of combining the ingredients took days of precise work, almost doubling its cost. He had been purchasing the two items separately for decades, taking the time to meld them properly himself, it made the potions he prepared significantly more affordable to make. One small bottle could sustain him for over a year, as it was not a commonly used ingredient, perhaps due to the cost of experimenting with it.
Severus pulled the stopper from the bottle’s short neck, taking a long glass dropper and inserting it into the heavy liquid, extracting a small amount. He replaced the cork and set the bottle aside. He moved the dropper so it was over the mouth of the beaker, adding a single drop into the bubbling mixture every forty-two seconds for three and a half minutes; exactly five drops in total.
He turned back to the potion, stirring it in a careful figure eight pattern, all the while counting seconds in his mind. Using a thick set of tongs, he removed the beaker from the flame, taking a clean dropper and moving back to the potion. Three drops into the mix, thirty seconds to let it rest, six drops into the mix, one minute to allow it to be absorbed, so on and so forth. He continued the process, until he had been standing there for over forty five minutes; the beaker was empty.
He set everything aside and turned down the heat, stirring eighteen times clockwise with a new glass rod. This last step was not required in the original formula; the adding of the venom and saliva directly into the potion would be acceptable. The differences between the brewing processes were minimal, excluding ingredients used, but still interesting to note.
He leaned against the work bench as the potion boiled, perspiration beading across his forehead from standing over the hot cauldron and its fire.
Severus got moving again, collecting all of the used tools and putting them in the sink a safe distance away. He re-shelved any ingredients he wouldn’t need later and sanitized the work station all over again. He set the alarm on his wand and went to sit at the table on the other side of the room where Teddy and he had worked at the other day.
Twenty five minutes; it was enough time to go check on Lupin and return. He decided to rest a moment instead, slumping against the table briefly. If he had taken one extra minute to get down here and get started he would have had to scrap the entire batch. He vowed to be more careful with the third phase of the wolfsbane. Everything seemed to be going perfectly and he had no wish to bung it all up in the last steps.
He roused himself, sliding the manuscript he’d been working on closer, as well as a quill and some more parchment. If he kept his head on the table like that, he would fall asleep, more than likely missing the last portion of the brewing process altogether.
He was unravelling a very tricky paragraph, the language it used was complicated and obscure even in the time of its creation, when the alarm on his wand went off.
Severus threw down what he was doing and went directly over to the cauldron. He was relieved to see the potion appeared to be bubbling thickly and was bright red, just as it was supposed to be. Taking a brown paper bag out of the cupboard in the work station he brought out a large piece of magically preserved Antipodean Opaleye skin, jeweled scales still intact.
Carefully breaking up a small piece, he returned the rest to its place in the cupboard. The piece that had been removed, he brought over to the cauldron and crumbled in his fingers, feeling the magic inside him stir, he felt alive with it as he broke the brittle scales into the mixture. The vibrant red of the potion dulled until it was the color of clay; perfection.
He proceeded to wash, sterilize, dry and put away every instrument he had used. When the lab looked the same way it had when he had entered it, he set out everything he would need for the third phase, in case he wasn’t here in time to do it.
Heading up the stairs, and removing his bubble head charm as he reached the kitchen, he took the time to put on a pot of coffee before heading to the top level of the house. When he did, Remus seemed to be sleeping, as did Teddy. He decided there would be no better time to have a quick shower, turning away from Teddy’s door and crossing the hall.
He turned the lock on the door, knowing no one was going to come in but doing it regardless. Out of habit he cast wards of defense and protection over the window and door; it was something he had done since before the first fall of Riddle. Only then did he start the water and disrobe. He hung his robe on the peg on the door, folding everything else he was wearing neatly and setting it on the counter beside the sink.
Stepping into the shower, hot water cascaded over him. Snape wasted no time, washing his hair and body with practiced efficiency. His wand rested in an alcove in the side of the wall he had installed for just such a purpose; only a few years ago either side could have come here to try and end him. Even today, he never knew what fanatic waited for him to lay his guard to rest, be they dark or light. Either side had reason enough to want his blood, even his life.
He turned the water off, stepped out of the tub with his wand in hand and proceeded to towel off. He realized he hadn’t brought a fresh set of clothes, so he threw on his robe, grabbed his soiled things off the counter and opened the door, dissolving his wards. He took the quick trip to his room, throwing his used clothing into the hamper and donning a new set, clean outer robe included.
He returned to the loo, where the open door had allowed the mirror to un-fog enough that he could comb his hair with some measure of accuracy. The wand in the pocket of his new robe went off suddenly; it wasn’t the alarm indicating there was anything wrong with the potion either.
He rushed across the hall, finding Lupin still in his bed, sleeping soundly. He sprinted the few short steps to Teddy’s room, finding his bed empty and unmade yet surprisingly dry. If the child hadn’t wet the bed, what was wrong with him and where was he?
“Teddy?” Severus asked the seemingly empty room, not surprised he didn’t get an immediate response. The boy couldn’t be far, the wards would alert him if anyone but Fred came in or out of the house.
He opened the armoire, finding nothing but the folded clothes Fred had put in there the other day. He knelt to peer under the bed, finding nothing but dust and the wall it was resting against. He pulled the chair out of the desk, peering into the space underneath.
Teddy was huddling silently in the far corner, head tucked into his knees which were pulled up as far as they would go, his arms curled above him in defense.
“Hello, Teddy,” Severus said quietly.
The boy shrank back, every muscle in his small body retracting, making himself as small as he could.
With a deep sigh, Snape sat on the floor a short ways from the opening of the desk; that way Teddy could come out if he wanted, Snape wouldn’t be lurking right outside his only exit.
“Teddy,” he tried again. “Are you okay? Are you in any pain?” There would be no examining the child in his current position under the desk; surely nothing good could come out of dragging him into the open?
He heard a small hiccough; the child seemed to be crying.
“Your father is sleeping in the next room,” he tried. “Remember, he is getting better; you and I made a potion to help him. Do you remember that, Teddy; do you know who I am?” There was no telling what state of awareness the boy was in, perhaps he was sleepwalking in the middle of a dream?
“You’re my master,” Teddy sobbed, seemingly unable to stop himself.
“Good; yes, I am your new master. We made potions together; you recall that, don’t you?”
Teddy was quiet; Snape wished he could see the expression on his face.
“Teddy, I’d like you to try coming out of there. Can you do that for me?” Snape was speaking slowly and clearly; he didn’t want to frighten the boy more than he already was.
“I don’t know, master; I don’t think so.” Teddy’s words were choked by tears.
“Can you tell me why not?” Severus pressed, careful to keep himself still.
“No.”
Severus wasn’t entirely sure what he should do. If he had done something like this when he was Teddy’s age, his father would have hauled him out of there, beat him stupid and thrown him into the space under the seat in the bay window for the night. Snape had reupholstered the seat and then magically fastened it to the hollow bench after the man’s death. Still, he spent little time to no time in the sitting room to this day, hating even being within eyesight of that cramped little hellhole.
“You know that I’m not angry with you, right?” He had nothing but time, may as well try and figure out what exactly was going on.
“Yeah right. Sir.” Teddy only cried harder after saying that.
Snape cleared his mind of anything that wasn’t tranquil, peaceful. He focused on the feelings he had felt the other day when he and Teddy had brewed their first potion together, when he watched the boy make his first reluctant marks on the page of his coloring book; a sort of hesitant pride being at the forefront.
He used a trick he had learned years ago and used his strength as a Legilimens to ‘push’ those emotions in Teddy’s direction. He still didn’t move any closer; if this didn’t work he was going to have to do something really crazy, like banishing the desk and everything on it, in order to get the boy into the open without forcibly pulling him out.
Teddy made no move except to raise his head so he could see Snape, who was still sitting on the floor a few feet away from him. His eyes were brimming with tears, he sniffled wetly and his dripping eyes narrowed a little. “You’re lying,” the boy accused coldly, he sounded quite angry about it.
Snape had not expected that. “How could I lie about that?” Of course there were ways, but none six year old children would know about.
Teddy looked at him hike he was stupid. “Magic, of course.”
Snape really had not expected that; he huffed with laughter. “How’d you get so smart? Yes, I could do that with very specific magic, but I have not done so to those emotions.”
“How do I know you’re telling the truth, master?” Teddy implored, dropping his head back to his knees. “You’re just going to be mad when I come out. You’re going to hit me with those ropes, I just know it!”
The boy certainly sounded like he believed what he was saying. “How do you know that? I certainly haven’t harmed you so far.”
“I woke up knowing,” the boy said, sniffling again.
“So, you dreamed that I would whip you?” Snape’s eyebrows furrowed, trying to understand.
“I don’t know; maybe.” Teddy seemed open to the possibility. “It seemed so real, sir.”
“Dreams can have a way of doing that, especially when they are frightening.” He had enough experience on that subject to write a small set of encyclopedias. “You have been asleep since I last saw you; you haven’t had time to do anything to make me angry. Even when you do make me cross, I promise, I will never whip you. I don’t think I could ever hurt you like that.” Something lightened inside when he looked deep into himself and found that statement to be true.
“You can stay under there, if you like,” Severus offered. “I’ll wait for you to come out.” He stood and began to straighten the sheets and blankets on Teddy’s bed, ending up making it over again and turning back the covers.
“I’m going to move the chair further away from the desk, give you a little room. I can’t sit on the floor like you can, I’m getting too old.” He did just that, moving the chair a distance away and taking a seat. He brought the light in the room up just a little; maybe the child would feel a little braver if he could see a little better. Though he probably saw better in the dark than Severus himself did; one of the more positive traits of his condition.
Maybe five minutes passed. “You’re just going to wait there, sir?” Teddy sounded uncertain.
“Yes; someone has to help get you back to bed.” There was the sound of a smile in his voice.
“You’re still going to tuck me in, master? After I’ve been so rude to you?” Teddy was sobbing again.
“Little boys are sometimes rude when they are tired,” Severus reasoned. “Are you feeling ready to come out yet?”
Teddy nodded, his breath hitching. He shuffled out of the opening, standing rather shakily after all that time crouched down. He seemed unsure what to do next, his arms wrapped around his middle; tears running down his thin cheeks.
“Come here,” Snape said softly, holding out one hand in a welcoming gesture.
Teddy hurried over to him, stopping just outside his reach. “I’m sorry, sir,” he said again despondently.
“It’s okay Teddy,” Severus replied, not retracting his arm; Teddy took a few steps closer to him. Severus wiped the tearstains from his cheeks with one hand, which he rested softly on the boy’s shoulder. He looked at the child intently, trying to figure out what to do next.
A man of lesser reflexes may have been startled by the boy’s next move, but Snape took in stride the best he could. Teddy bolted the short distance closer to him, wrapping his small arms tightly around Severus’ middle.
Snape held his arms out in surprise, looking down at the crying boy holding onto him for what appeared to be dear life, before he closed his arms carefully around the child’s shoulders.
“I knocked over your potion, sir,” Teddy wailed. “You were furious; I tried running away, but you were faster than me! When you caught me – you dragged me up here; you hit me with the ropes, just like he did! It hurt so bad, master, it felt just like that time he did it. I woke up; I heard you coming, I had to hide!”
Severus squeezed a little tighter, sure that anything he could say in this moment would be insufficient.
The boy continued, snuffling into Snape’s robes, “But you came and you weren’t even mad.”
“It was a dream, Teddy,” Severus affirmed. “None of that ever happened, though I understand that when you woke up you thought that maybe it had.” A thought occurred to him. “You’re back doesn’t hurt, does it?”
“Sometimes, master; if I bump it or scratch it.” Teddy released him and moved back a little.
“Would you mind if I looked at it?” He tried to keep his voice level; magically repaired wounds shouldn’t be so tender this long after healing.
“I - I guess so, sir,” Teddy gulped.
“Turn around then,” Snape said softly, raising the lights in the room so he could see properly.
The boy did as he was asked.
Severus lifted the hem of his night shirt, raising it so he could see the scarred expanse of Teddy’s back. It appeared to be completely healed, though the damage was extensive for someone so young. Macnair clearly hadn’t cared to go easy on the boy or even to tend the scarring after, what else had he neglected?
He pressed lightly at the edges of one of the scars. Teddy flinched away.
“Does that hurt?” Snape asked in surprise.
“Yes, sir,” Teddy answered quietly.
“Teddy, do you remember drinking a potion after you received these?”
“He gave me one, sir, it tasted awful!”
“Did anyone ever put anything onto your back, before or after it was healed?”
“No sir, I just had to drink that potion a couple of times.”
Severus could have cursed; of course no one had taken care of the deeper tissue damage. The outer layers of skin could be healed perfectly, but underneath the healing only extended so far; without a topical cream or the proper regimen of potions, a person could live in discomfort for the rest of their lives.
Snape pulled Teddy’s shirt back into place. “Do they hurt right now?” he asked.
Teddy shrugged, sitting on the edge of the bed. ”Am I going to have them forever, sir?”
Severus winced. “They will fade, with time. But unfortunately the potion capable of repairing that kind of damage needs to be applied as soon as the skin heals, or it will be ineffective.”
“So they’ll always be there.” Teddy restated.
“I’m sorry to say, yes, they will, though they will fade with time.”
“What happens when someone sees them? They’ll know what happened to me. Besides, they itch and they look awful, sir.” Teddy sounded concerned.
“This cream should help with the itching and soreness. Since they are on your back they will be easy enough to hide, save from people you trust.”
“How do you know?” Teddy was back to sounding argumentative.
“I have some of my own,” Severus admitted.
“You? Yeah right!” Teddy couldn’t believe the words that came out of his mouth; he’d already been forgiven for speaking like a little bastard once, he doubted he’d get the same grace a second time. It was just so hard to believe; who could ever have that kind of power over his master? The man seemed so strong.
“Indeed.” Severus stood.
Teddy crawled back against the wall, knowing what came next. He was startled when Snape turned his back on him, taking his loose outer robe off to reveal his regular clothing underneath. He pulled his shirt loose and hoisted it up as far as he could on his shoulder blades.
Teddy gasped. The man’s back was covered in scars. “You do have them!”
Snape lowered his shirt, replacing his outer robe and sitting back in the chair. “Yes, I do. All they are is a reminder; we went through something terrible and survived. Anyone who does not see them like that has clearly never experienced anything of the sort and therefore has no idea what they are talking about. Don’t feel shame for having them, feel pride in knowing you are stronger even than something that can mark you so permanently.”
“Is that what you do, sir?”
“That is what I try to do,” Snape amended.
“How did you get them?”
“That is a story for when you are much older.” So old that he himself was preferably dead. He had never trusted anyone enough to help him apply the potion that would prevent the scars from lasting, so he had just accepted them. That did not mean the topic was up for discussion; especially with a child too young to hear of it.
Teddy frowned.
“Don’t go anywhere,” Snape said, standing and exiting the room, returning shortly after with the potion of healing salve he had been applying to Remus’ injuries. It helped fresh ones heal, but should alleviate some of the discomfort Teddy was feeling in his older scars.
“Lay down on your stomach; I’ve got something here that will assist you in healing completely. Your back will stop being so sore after a few treatments.”
Teddy lay down, helping Snape to pull up his shirt so he could access the scars.
Severus removed his outer robe for a second time, rolling up his sleeves and casting a sterilization charm on his hands as was his customary practice before doing anything like this, healed injuries or not. He scooped some of the cream out, applying it as gently to Teddy’s fairly smooth skin as he did to Lupin’s rough, healing flesh.
Teddy sighed in relief. “It feels so nice and cool, sir.”
“It will start to work almost immediately, I’m glad it helps you to feel better.” Was this child unique in some way, did he contain some magical force that compelled Snape to say things he couldn’t remember ever wanting to say to anyone else? Because he could see no other explanation for his words of comfort.
“Sir?” Teddy asked.
“Yes?” Severus continued to apply the cream, not missing a single scar. He couldn’t believe Macnair hadn’t bothered with this; it was a basic step in tending an injury. Of course, the lycanthrope friendly version of this potion cost a pretty penny, but a little went a long way.
“Earlier I seemed to… feel a bunch of things that weren’t from inside my own head. That was you, right?” Teddy seemed to get lost in his own question.
“Yes, that was me. I thought that maybe you wouldn’t be so frightened by me if you were made aware of how I actually see you, not how you think I see you. Do you understand what I’m saying?” Snape cast a wandless protection spell over Teddy’s back, protecting the cream from being wiped away before it could do its full work. He pulled Teddy’s shirt back into place. “I’m finished, go ahead and get comfortable.” He screwed the lid back on the jar.
“Did you mean all that, sir; or did you make it up so I would come out from under the desk?” Teddy asked in a small voice, avoiding Severus’ eye while he climbed under the covers.
“What you experienced were my actual thoughts about you,” Severus said carefully; in hindsight doing that had perhaps not been so bright on his part. What had he thought the child would make out of all that? He looked down to see the boy smiling up at him, head resting on his pillow. “I’m sorry if they frightened you.”
“I just didn’t understand where they were coming from. Thank you sir, for showing them to me; they were nice.”
Snape pulled the blankets up to his chin, not sure what to say. Both Lupins seemed to have the special skill of striking him dumb in the middle of a conversation. “You think you could go back to sleep? You’ll be quite tired tomorrow if you don’t.”
“Yes, sir; I think so.”
“Alright, I’ll be back up to look in on you later. Sleep well.”
“Thank you sir, goodnight,” Teddy all but yawned.
Severus peeked in at Lupin again, finding the man still dead to the world. Having a few minutes until he needed to be back in the lab, he crept down to the kitchen and poured himself a mug of coffee, sitting at the table and sipping it black. This would hopefully help him to keep his wits about him enough that he would be able to complete the third phase properly.
Sometime tomorrow he would get the chance to sleep; it was something to work towards at least. He drained his cup and headed back down to the lab.
A/N: Thanks, as always for reading. As well, my endless, undying gratitude goes to anyone who has taken the time to review or rate this story, especially to those of you who have been with me since the beginning, your input keeps me going! Another chapter will be on its way soon since this one was kind of short.
Let me know what you thought!
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The Long Road