Adult-FanFiction.org : Harry Potter

Songs of Regret	By : RavieSnake Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female > Draco/Hermione Views: 76454 -:- Recommendations : 5 -:- Currently Reading : 17
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any of the characters from it. I also hold no rights to any of the songs mentioned. I make no money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 12
- 13
- 14
Hermione took a bite of toast as she reread over the list she had made. It was a rather impressive list for only two days. She couldn’t remember the last time she had played eight songs in such a short time. She set the notebook next to a plateful of toast on the table beside her and settled back into the dark blue armchair in the sitting room.

She gazed into the fire burning in the fireplace, munching on the toast Joonie had brought her for breakfast, and replayed the previous night’s events. For the first time in her life, Hermione felt satisfied and complete. It was a strange feeling. It was almost as if her soul had finally found that long-lost piece it needed to make itself whole. Even the absence of her children didn’t seem so bleak knowing that Draco would be by her side. Nothing that felt this right could be wrong. Everything would be okay.

“Hermione?” she heard Draco call from the bedroom, the silencing spell having long ago faded.

“In here,” she replied. She looked down and flicked at the few toast crumbs that were clinging to the lilac colored night gown she was wearing that she had found in the dresser and then took a sip of juice. Draco came through into the sitting room wearing only a pair of gray pajama bottoms and came-up beside her. Hermione looked up at him and admired his toned chest and messy hair. He leaned down and kissed her.

“Good morning, love,” he said as he straightened back up and went to his armchair.

“Good morning,” she smiled as she watched him grab a piece of toast. As he picked up the toast he noticed the notebook on the table and picked it up as well.

“What’s this?” he inquired as he took a bite and flipped open the notebook.

“I had Joonie bring me that and some quills, so I could keep track of my songs,” Hermione said as she started another piece of toast herself.

Draco perused the list. “Hmm. So that’s what that one is called. This is cool that you write them down. I can know what all of the titles are then.”

“I’m still surprised that you know any of the titles. When did you get into Muggle music?” she asked him as she took another sip of juice. Draco shrugged.

“It wasn’t long after the war ended and before Astoria and I married. I wasn’t working full-time yet and I needed something to do. I was short on friends and long on time, you know? I always loved music, though, so I devoted most of my free time to listening to different genres and artists. Wizard rock was all right, but it was missing something. Muggle music is much more emotional and diversified. I even had the company make a number of investments in Muggle record labels.”

Hermione beamed at him. She was still amazed by the idea that the spoiled prat she had known in school could be this down-to-earth. “Will you miss it? Running the company, I mean?” she asked.

Draco shrugged again. “I don’t know. I’m good at it…really good. I imagine I will do it again with it being the family business and all. Can’t say a few years off would do me any harm though,” he said with a smirk. “What about you? Going to miss all of your crime fighting?”

Hermione pursed her lips and stared into the fire. “I wasn’t really doing a whole lot of ‘crime fighting.’ As the deputy head I mostly dealt with paperwork, administration, legal issues... I was glad for the promotion, but…I don’t know. The job sort of lost its luster after that. Though that may have had more to do with Ron deciding to retire as an Auror at the same time. That’s when we started to have problems. Without work to talk about…we didn’t talk.” She looked pained for a brief moment and then smiled at Draco.

“He probably didn’t like the fact that you made more money than him,” Draco said matter-of-factly before taking another bite. Hermione furrowed her brow a little.

“What if I made more money than you?”

Draco shook his head as he swallowed his bite. “Not possible, Granger,” he said and then chuckled when she huffed at him. He looked back down at the notebook in his lap. “Did you used to write down his songs?”

“I recorded every song I ever played since third year,” Hermione answered softly. “I wonder if Dumbledore would let me use a Pensieve so I could write them all down again.”

“Would you let me read them all?” Draco asked replacing the notebook on the table.

Hermione considered him a moment. “Would you want to read them all?”

Before Draco could answer a silver doe Patronus bounded into the room and clopped silently before them and opened its mouth.

“Prepare for the day. You have thirty minutes,” it barked in Snape’s voice before disappearing.

Draco turned to Hermione. “What the hell is that about? Dumbledore said we’d have the day off.”

“He said we wouldn’t have to give him memories today. Seems Snape has other plans for us,” Hermione said as she stood. She walked her way to the bedroom doorway and Draco watched as she went, admiring the way her arse moved beneath her nightgown.

Damn it all. He'd had plans for that arse today.

Draco huffed loudly and finished off Hermione’s juice before getting up to follow her. He came through the curtain to find her already at the wardrobe looking through the clothes made available to them.

“These are all school uniforms,” she lamented. She had already looked in the dresser and knew that it only contained pajamas, socks, and under garments. They were going to have to dress as students all week. She held out a uniform in front of her still on the hanger and pouted. They looked exactly like the ones she had just purchased for Rose. The uniforms in the wardrobe even had the black ties used for first years before they received a house color.

Draco joined Hermione at the wardrobe and took down a uniform for himself. “Best get used to it,” he said with a nudge to her shoulder.

They took their borrowed uniforms and dressed quickly in silence.

Draco was seated on the edge of the bed, just finishing tying his shoes when he looked up to see Hermione contemplating her reflection in the full length mirror on the backside of the door to the wardrobe. She smoothed down her skirt and then bit her lip as she ran her hands down her torso feeling the softness of the grey jumper covering her white dress shirt.

“You look fucking amazing in that,” he called to her. She looked at him via his reflection in the mirror and scowled.

“What is it with men and school girl uniforms?” she asked with annoyance. Draco laughed.

“I don’t know,” he answered, “but I’m going to have a damn difficult time keeping my hands off of you during class.”

Without retort, Hermione walked to the nightstand, grabbed her wand and went into the bathroom. Draco shook his head at her and went to the mirror to admire his own reflection. “Not bad, Malfoy,” he said to himself with a smirk and combed his hand through his hair.

Twenty minutes later, Draco and Hermione were standing in the sitting room, ready and waiting for Snape to retrieve them when they heard the locks of the main door click. A loud knock sounded and Draco yelled, “Come in!”

A second later, Snape’s tall, dark form pushed into the room. He eyed Draco and Hermione critically for a moment before he spoke. “Sleep well?” he drawled. Draco narrowed his eyes at Snape’s tone, but neither he nor Hermione said anything. The corner of Snape’s lip curled slightly and he pointed at the door for them to exit. They walked passed him into the hall silently.

Snape followed after them and relocked the door. He turned to them with a hard expression. “While Albus reviews your memories he has asked me to assist the two of you with other…assignments. Today, you will be splitting up. Draco, you will assist me in the dungeons. Hermione, you are to go to the restricted section in the library and research this,” he said, handing her a folded note.

Hermione and Draco gaped at him like fish out of water. The sound of their given names from Snape’s mouth was so foreign they barely registered them correctly.

Seeing their surprise, Snape elaborated, “Albus feels that it is important that we address one another by our first names. You will call me Severus when you are not in class. However, you would do well to remember to address me as ‘Sir’ or ‘Professor Snape’ in front of your classmates. Are we clear?”

“You got it, Severus,” Draco said with a wicked grin. Hermione’s jaw dropped a little more and Snape scowled. He turned dramatically and marched down the hall. Hermione gave Draco a peck on the cheek. “Good luck,” she whispered and then took off toward the library. Draco felt his cheek, watched Hermione disappear around the corner and then jogged down the hall to catch up with Snape.

When they reached the dungeons, Snape opened the door to the potions classroom and locked it behind them when they entered the room.

“My office,” he commanded. Draco gave Snape a wary look, but went to the office. Snape followed him in and again locked but also warded the door behind them.

“What is going on? Why did you split me and Hermione up? And why are you warding us in here?” Draco asked angrily.

Snape ignored his questions and instead said, “Sit.” Snape sat in his chair behind his desk and glared at Draco who had not moved. Draco glared back, but seeing the Potions Master was unfazed, sat tentatively in the chair in front of the desk.

Snape said nothing and took off his robes. He then opened the cuff of his shirt sleeve and rolled it up. When it was rolled past the crook of his arm, he slammed his elbow on the desk with his fist up presenting his left forearm to Draco’s view and gave him a deadly serious look. Draco stared at Snape’s forearm with the Dark Mark upon it and felt the urge to vomit.

“There are times in a man’s life when he must choose,” Snape began in a low tone, “Choose between life and death, choose between love and hate, choose between light and dark. I chose this mark for all of the wrong reasons, but I have also chosen to use it to serve a greater purpose.”

Draco’s heart was pounding painfully in his chest and his hands were trembling involuntarily as he looked between Snape’s arm and intense gaze. He knew where this was going.

“You are going to have to choose, Draco. You must first choose between life and death. If you do not receive the Mark, you will die. The Dark Lord will see to it. You must then choose where you stand between The Light and The Dark, and how far you are willing to go to defend your choice.”

Snape stared at Draco intently and raised his eyebrow.

"He is expecting an answer right now?" Draco thought anxiously. He swallowed hard and shook his head in panic. “I…I…I can’t go through that again,” he stuttered. “The whole reason Hermione and I are in this shitty mess is because we regretted that I had the Dark Mark, and you want me to get it again?”

“Yes.”

“I can’t do it.”

“Then you choose death. Very well. Tell me, shall we have your mother or Hermione make the arrangements for your funeral?” Snape said coldly. Draco’s chest clenched and he grimaced. Snape raised his brow higher.

Draco shook his head harder. “Even if I could, what then!? I…I just what?”

“Then you choose again! Love or hate!? Light or Dark!?” Snape bellowed at him. Draco began to hyperventilate. Snape sighed and leaned back in his chair. “Draco,” he said in an even tone, “what would you do for her?”

Draco bowed his head and tried to calm his breathing as he considered the question. He had waited his entire life to feel as whole and content as Hermione had made him. The fact that he didn’t even need to ask Snape who ‘her’ was spoke volumes. He never wanted to go back to the stagnant loneliness and feeling of worthlessness of his future-past. What would he do to keep Hermione, to protect her, to make her as happy as she had finally made him?

“Anything,” he answered Snape in a voice barely louder than a whisper. He felt tears well in his eyes and he grabbed his left forearm. “FUCK!!” he yelled and stood abruptly knocking over his chair. “Why can’t we just go and kill that motherfucker right now!? We know how. Why make me do this?” he raged at Snape.

The professor shook his head. “The Dark Lord is much too powerful right now to just stroll Potter up to him and tell him to have a go. And if the Horcruxes are not destroyed before Potter kills him, we risk someone moving or using one or more of them and then we would be lost. Albus is reviewing Hermione’s memories as we speak to form a plan to destroy them, but until they are destroyed we must do our part.”

“And what is my part?” Draco asked defeated, righting his chair to sit again.

“If you choose it, your role would be one of agent for The Order of the Phoenix. I would spend the rest of the summer training you. You would be a spy and my partner in the ranks of the Death Eaters.”

“Your role as spy didn’t exactly end well for you last time, Severus,” Draco responded darkly.

Snape’s face went blank and he simply stared at Draco for a few moments. Without comment he reached down inside the high collar of his shirt and pulled out a silver necklace that he was wearing. He unclasped it and held it out in front of him to admire the small enameled lily pendant attached to the fine chain.

“I gave Lily Evans this necklace for her fourteenth birthday. She promised that she’d wear it for as long as she lived. In return, I promised that I would always be there for her.” He swallowed deeply and gently rubbed the pendant between his fingers. “When I found her body…she was still wearing this.”

Snape looked Draco directly in the eyes. “I will gladly die… again if that is what it takes to fulfill my promise and defeat the murderer of the only woman I ever loved. That is how far I will go, that is the choice I have made. No, it is you that needs to make a choice.”

Draco stared straight ahead and blinked in thought. The fear of once again having to experience the pain and humiliation he had always associated with the Dark Mark had clouded his mind and prevented him from rationalizing his situation. But Snape’s unexpected confession had jolted his brain back into gear and made him remember what was at stake and remember who he was.

He was Draco Malfoy: the master of compartmentalizing emotions. He did it every day in his board meetings and mergers. He had done it every day of his youth when he knew he was being scrutinized by his father. He could do it now. The Dark Mark would not rule him. This time he could get it for a purpose. This time around he could be remembered as something more than a disgraced ex-Death Eater.

The fear he had felt burning in his chest morphed into determination. He would do it. He’d help take that fucker down from right under his nonexistent nose. He’d be a hero…a knight for his new queen. He looked up at Snape with a steely expression and nodded.

“You have made a choice?” Snape asked severely.

“Yes,” Draco said, sitting-up straight.

“Life or death?”

Draco inhaled deeply, “Life.”

“Love or hate?” Snape asked loudly.

“Love,” Draco answered louder.

“Light or Dark!?” Snape shouted at him.

“Light!” Draco’s heart hammered wildly with adrenaline.

“Will you be a spy for The Order!?”

“Yes!”

“Will you risk your life every day for what is right!?”

“Yes!”

“Good! Your training starts now. LEGILIMENS!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hermione stood before the doors of the library. She stared at them but couldn’t bring herself to go inside. This had been her sanctuary, her holy ground. The place held such a place of reverence in her memory that the thought of returning to experience its sights and smells as a plain old library again seemed almost blasphemous. But, oh, how she had missed this place.

She entered the library with one slow step in front of the other and breathed deeply to overwhelm her nose with the scents of musty parchment and worn leather. She sighed and marveled at how it still felt like home.

Gazing around her lovingly at the books she had come to treasure, Hermione made her way to the restricted section. She looked around for Madam Pince the librarian. “Madam Pince?” she called out.

“Madam Pince has taken leave for the summer holiday. Please direct all library associated queries to the Headmaster. Thank-you,” the magical recording played out in the air in response.

Hermione shrugged and entered the restricted section without incident. Once she was standing among the dark tomes and moldy volumes, she unfolded the note Snape had given her and looked down at it to see Dumbledore’s neat script.

Research and familiarize yourself with the following: maceratio ignis (fire taming), Fiendfyre, and associative telekinetic and telepathic abilities.

Hermione read and reread the note. Telepathic abilities. Did they know about her projection? And why on earth would Dumbledore want her to familiarize herself with Fiendfyre? She turned the note over several times, looking for any writing she may have missed, but saw only the one set of instructions.
She twisted her mouth and contemplated going to see the Headmaster to ask him about it before she began, but decided against it. Even if it weren’t entirely useful to her now, Hermione was never against gaining more knowledge. Using her wand, she cast a quick Accio for the most relevant sources discussing the items on her note. Within moments a small pile of books and scrolls was at her feet.

Looking down at the pile she sighed and then levitated it to a table. She sat down, pulled a book and began her day’s assignment.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Ah, ah, ah. Nice try, Severus,” Snape heard ring through his head. The Potions Master looked daggers at the smirking blond seated before him. “Looking for anything in particular?”

Draco sat back in his chair, crossed his arms, and cocked an eyebrow. Snape had been attempting to break into his mind for the better part of two hours. Each time that Snape had failed, he would bring-up a new topic of discussion and then try to inconspicuously perform Legilimency on him again while he was distracted. But Draco’s mind was a steel trap.

It was the one thing Draco could admit he was grateful to his crazy bitch aunt for. Bellatrix had taught him Occlumency his sixth year to ensure that his mission to kill Dumbledore remained secret. It had come in handy too. Not just then, but throughout his life as well. Draco was a natural at Occlumency.

It had taken only a few lessons before he was even better than his aunt. He knew it was a difficult branch of magic to master and it gave him an enormous sense of pride that he was able to learn and perform it so quickly and effortlessly when most couldn’t even get through one lesson. He had been something of a prodigy.

Snape sat back in his own chair and regarded Draco carefully. He had not expected him to be so advanced. In fact, he had spent most of the morning dreading the prospect of the Occlumency lesson, expecting a repeat of the atrocious tutorials he had attempted to give Potter.

But Draco had not once faltered. No matter how he tried to enter his mind, he was thwarted. And what was more, Draco was able to communicate back to him inside his head. He could hear him clear as day, and Draco’s mind was perceptive enough to accept communication in return. Snape had never met anyone who had been capable of both. As far as he knew, not even Voldemort was able to do it.

“You are quite gifted at shutting your mind down, Draco. But just protecting the mind will not be enough,” Snape thought back to him.

“What more would you like to see me do?” Draco mentally sassed back.

“Select specific images and emotions. Display them with purpose, while feeling an opposing emotion,” Snape answered. Draco sat-up in acceptance of Snape’s challenge.

“Test me,” Draco voiced out loud. Snape gave him a dangerous look.

“Was it you or Hermione that was projecting the music while you fucked in that pool?”

Draco’s eyes went comically wide and he found himself able only to envision the scene of a slippery Hermione writhing against him in steamy water. The pure shock of Snape’s question had broken through his defenses. Draco looked at his old professor with fearful awe.

“I believe I’ve found your weakness,” Snape said smugly.

“How…how do you…” Draco began, but Snape cut him off.

“It does not matter what I know or how I know it. What matters is what you want me to ‘know’ or ‘not know.’ The Dark Lord will not hesitate to provoke you with questions much more shocking, I can assure you. In addition to protecting your memories, you must also be able to select and manipulate them instantaneously despite your emotions.”

The thought of Voldemort asking questions about Hermione scared the ever-loving shite out of Draco. He needed to get this right. He looked at Snape with determination. “Test me again.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Subjects capable of projectable telepathic magic will, in most cases, be additionally capable of advanced elemental telekinesis in at least one form.”

Hermione read the line for the fiftieth time. Surely it didn’t mean what she thought it meant. Elemental telekinesis? She looked at the note Dumbledore had written. Fire taming? Did he think she was capable of controlling fire because she was a Telepath? And how did he know about her ability? Her mind reeled and she sat back with a hand to her forehead. Then a thought hit her.

“The book says ‘elemental’ not ‘fire.’ Why did he specify fire as the element to research? Why not water or air?” She thought hard for a moment, letting the innermost cogs of her brain whir to find some kind of revelation. And then there it was.

Her Bluebell Flames. She made them constantly. Little jars of flame could almost always be found upon the window sills and shelves of the Gryffindor common room during her years there. She had always felt this insatiable desire to create tiny fires. Spontaneous fire starting had even been her first magical manifestation. The neighbor boy had called her a ‘pyro’ when he saw her accidently set fire to a pile of leaves.

The possibilities of being a fire tamer exploded in Hermione’s mind. And the Fiendfyre…if she could control that…

“Oh, my gods,” Hermione breathed to herself. She needed to get this right. She opened up the next book and delved in.

Several hours later, she was startled from her reading by the sound of Snape clearing his throat. She looked up and saw him looking down his large nose at her with a dazed looking Draco standing some feet behind him. She pushed her frazzled hair out of her face and rubbed her eyes.

“Productive day?” Snape asked coolly. Hermione simply stared at him and he frowned. “Collect your things. You will both spend the rest of the day in your room,” he said and then turned and stalked to the library entrance.

Hermione looked at Draco with a smile and a raised eyebrow, but he simply gave her a blank stare and turned to follow Snape. Hermione’s stomach turned for a moment. Draco hadn’t given her a look like that since they were in school the first time. What had Snape made him do?

With more than a small amount of apprehension, Hermione shrunk the books she was reading and placed them in her robe pockets. Then she exited the library and ran to catch-up to the two men walking briskly ahead of her.

When they arrived to their room, Snape opened the door and ushered them inside before coming in behind them.

“You will both be training and giving memories tomorrow. I suggest you actually get some rest,” he said with a significant look between Draco and Hermione. Hermione narrowed her eyes at him, but before either could respond, Snape was at the door.

“I will retrieve you at 8 am sharp. I suggest you be ready by then,” he said sternly and closed the door with a slight bang. Draco and Hermione heard the locks click and then faced each other.

“Are you okay?” Hermione asked Draco timidly. He still looked rather aloof.

“I’m pretty fucking far from okay, Granger,” he answered curtly. Hermione’s stomach burned with something like panic and fear. It actually caused her to grimace and grab her hand to her belly. “What happened?” she whispered.

Draco looked down at her and felt himself soften a tad. He placed his arms around her and pulled her in for a tight hug. He kissed her forehead and then laid his head on top of hers.

“I’m sorry,” he said. “I don’t want to go over it just now. I’ll be okay as long as you promise never to leave me.”

“Why would I leave you?” she muffled into his neck. Draco said nothing but squeezed her tighter. He held her for a few minutes and then pulled back and gave her a weak smile.

“What did you have to research today?” he asked trying to sound casual. Hermione was still wary of Draco’s strange mood, but she couldn’t help the huge grin that spread across her face at his question.

“Let me show you,” she said enticingly as she went to the fireplace. A fire was already crackling within it and Hermione knelt down in front of the hearth. She bit her lip and stared intently into the flames. Draco watched her with cautious curiosity as she held out a hand towards the grate.

“Hermione!” he yelled and lunged forward as she placed her entire arm into the fire. Before he could get to her, she had already pulled back and stood. She held out her arm and Draco’s jaw dropped to the floor. A single flame rolled and swirled up and around her forearm. She placed her hand palm up and flexed her fingers and the flame flowed into her hand and bobbed in place. She then blew on the fiery ball and it drifted right back into the fireplace.

Draco grabbed Hermione’s arm and inspected it. Her robes and skin were completely unharmed.

“How in the bloody hell did you do that?” he demanded.

She shrugged. “Magic.”

Draco blinked at her stupidly for a moment and then suddenly burst out laughing. He laughed so hard he doubled over and grabbed onto one of the armchairs to support himself.

His laugh was so perfect. It was strong and gravelly and completely infectious. Hermione smiled widely at him and then let out her own rolling laugh. Draco moved from the chair and grabbed hold of Hermione as they continued their laughter. She calmed a bit and leaned into his ear.

“I love your laugh,” she whispered to him.

“I love that you can make me laugh,” Draco responded still chuckling through his words. He calmed himself and sighed into her hair. “I was in quite a foul mood just a moment ago, and all it took was one word from your smart mouth to bring me around.”

Hermione pulled back a little and looked at him. “I told you I have a way with moody creatures,” she said jokingly. Draco grinned and hugged her tighter.

“This moody creature would like to have its way with you,” he said playfully as he leaned down to trail kisses down her neck.

“Hmmm,” Hermione hummed as his warm tongue swirled along her sensitive skin. “Draco?” she said softly with her head back as he continued his attentions to her throat.

“Mmm?” he acknowledged without stopping.

“Does Snape know?”

Draco slowed to a stop and gave her neck one final kiss. “Yes,” he sighed, leaning his head against hers.

“Does he know about…”

“He knows everything, love,” he interrupted. He pulled up and looked her in the eyes. “He even knows about your music.”

Hermione blushed scarlet. “I think Dumbledore knows too. Merlin, this is humiliating,” she whimpered, planting her face into Draco’s chest. Draco felt his heart explode.

This beautiful witch in front him was more amazing than he could have ever hoped. She knew that he was the only one that knew about her music and yet she hadn’t gotten angry or accused him of telling Snape. And the fact that she was embarrassed of her most remarkable gift tore him apart.

“You aren’t mad at me?” he asked her.

“Why would I be mad at you? You wouldn’t have told them about us…you aren’t exactly the type that likes to share,” she answered surely. Draco grabbed the sides of her head and slammed his lips over hers. He snogged her breathless and then pulled back to stare at her intensely.

“You are perfect. Do you hear me? Perfect. You have nothing to be embarrassed about. Not one fucking thing,” he said sternly. She blinked at him with teary eyes and he smiled. “Now, then, my queen…how about you show me just how perfect you are and get your sexy arse into bed so I have a song to play in my head during our torture tomorrow?”

Hermione grinned like a fool and wriggled out of his grasp. She bit her lip at him and Draco growled mischievously. Hermione giggled and darted to the bedroom with Draco hot on her heels.
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Songs of Regret