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ONE LIFE TO LIVE	By : Mistress Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female > Snape/Hermione Views: 9833 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 2
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or any of the characters. Nor do I make any money off of writing in here.

Chapter List
- 12
- 13
- 14
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
LUCIUS (PART TWO)

A whole hour in the waiting room of St Mungo’s and not a single update. Severus is with me, but we don’t talk to each other. Inside, I can’t help but to blame him for what happened with Cissy, but now is not a time for any discussions, so I patiently wait for the doctor to come out of that blasted room and let me know what’s happening to my wife.
Finally the door opens and an elderly Mediwizard steps out. He offers me his hand with greeting.
- “Mr Malfoy I assume?”
- “Yes”
- “It’s nice to meet you. I am doctor Luis Amberton. I used to know your father and I remember you from your early days.”
- “It’s nice to meet you again doctor. How is she?”
- “She is stable”
- “And… and the baby?” For a moment I forget how to breathe.
- “I’m afraid we were not able to save it.”
Doctor’s words kill any feelings of hope that I might have had. Suddenly a sensation of something burning running down my cheekbones. Without giving it another thought, I turn my head to Severus, but he’s just standing there with his face buried into the palms of his hands.
- “I’m so sorry for your loss, Mister Malfoy” doctor says, handing me his handkerchief. “I understand how you must feel now, but I’m afraid I need to ask you a few questions.”
I bring my eyes up to him again. – “Sure. What would you like to know?”
- “I’m sorry if my question may seem strange to you, but… do you know of any severe injuries or beatings your wife might have suffered as a child? The reason I ask is because all the tests that we did on her indicate that the damage to her internal organs is quite excessive.”
I can feel my heart sinking as the words come out of his mouth.
“This leads me to believe that she was…”
- “Raped? Yes, she was. Some time ago. She just started to get over it recently and we thought that having this baby will be a good thing for both of us.”
- “I understand and again… I’m very sorry for your loss.”
- “Doctor, I hope you understand that confidentiality in this case is crucial to us.”
- “Don’t worry Mister Malfoy, this information will not leave these walls. Now, I assume you want to go see your wife. You can go and stay with her for some time, but I wouldn’t recommend to make it too long of a visit, I would like her to get more rest before we can let her go home.”
- “I understand. Thank you for everything.”
- “You’re quite welcome, sir. I’ll be there to check up on her a little later, after I do my rounds.”
I take a few steps to the door and stop, feeling a hand on my shoulder.
- “I’m so sorry, brother.”
- “Sorry?” I turn around to face him. “It’s because of your foolishness, my baby is dead.” I know my words hurt, but at this point I don’t care.
- “I never meant for it to happen. I didn’t know.”
- “Of course you didn’t. You locked yourself up in that basement from the rest of the world. You, and your hate, and blood thirst, and your stupid actions, robed me from the most beautiful thing that ever happened to me.
- “I never wanted anything bad to happen to you or Cissy. I don’t know what I was thinking cutting my wrists like that. I was drunk and felt like crap for doing this to Bella, but I couldn’t think of anything else except the revenge that we both wanted.”
- “You wanted. Don’t you understand? I had a chance for a family, for a real fucking family and you killed it. You took it from me.”
- “Lucius, please…”
“Just leave Severus. Leave and let me be with my wife” I said, turning away from him and trying hopelessly to hide the tears that felt like they will burn straight through my face.”
It took me a few moments to hear a soft pop behind my back and I walked into the room without turning my head.
Next two month passed in a blur. Paradise that was once my house, was now only a pathetic reminder of a real home. Cissy was silent again. She didn’t say a word to me from the time we left that damned hospital. All my attempts to have her open up to me, resulted nothing but tears.
As for me, I was simply lost. I didn’t know what to do anymore. Severus was not around. Some of the things he owned were still in his room, but he was not in the house anymore. I felt like I lost everything. As my depression grew, my dependence on alcohol came back. I couldn’t make myself shed any more tears, so I drank. The mark on my hand burned a few times, but I was too drunk to answer the call. At some point the pain from the burning got so excruciating that I didn’t have a choice but to drag myself to the castle and beg The Dark Lord for forgiveness.
Unbelievably, but my punishment was not as severe, as I thought it would be.
- “I know what happened to you Lucius, but it’s not a reason to not answer my summons” The Dark Lord said, after releasing me from a short session of Cruciatus I was placed under as soon as I stepped into the castle.
- “I know My Lord and I beg for your forgiveness”
-“In spite of common public opinion, I too can show benevolence to my subjects. Especially the ones that are of a great use to me.”
- “Thank you for your kindness, My Lord.”
- “I know that the loss of your child was hard for you, Lucius.”
- “Yes, My Lord.”
- “I also know that you haven’t seen Severus in a little over two month, have you not?”
- “Yes, My Lord. I haven’t seen him since… “
- “Since you blamed him for the loss of your child, I know that.”
- “I see that unlike me, my brother had confined in you, My Lord.”
- “He didn’t have to. His occlumency skills are not nearly enough to keep me from seeing what goes inside of his mind. He too has not been himself for this whole time and his work for me had not been as productive as I hoped it to be. That is the reason I decided that it’s time to put a stop to this disagreement between you two. There’s an item that I wish you to retrieve for me and I want both of you on it.”
- “My Lord, with all due respect I don’t think that mission such as this will require both of us.”
- “The mission is not hard and normally, someone like Fenrir would be good for it, but I want you to have a chance to talk and settle your differences. This little feud of yours is affecting your service to me and I can’t have that. Severus” he said and with his words, one of the doors that lead to the room, opened and Severus slowly approached us. He bowed his head in respect.
- “You have summoned me, My Lord.”
- “Yes. As I told you before, I want you two to settle your differences. This trip will allow you just that.”
- “As you wish, My Lord”
- “Now, the item I want you to retrieve for me is located in one of the museums of Muggle London. I have searched for it for quite some time now. Here’s the picture of it.”
He handed me the copy of Muggle newspaper that showed the picture of the diary of Alexander the Great and an article that it will be portrayed with few other items from the Great Library of Alexandria in the royal Museum of Great Britain.
- “My Lord, this diary…”
- “This diary belonged to one of the greatest wizards of all times and consists of valuable information and ancient spells that had been charmed into the pages of it and made look like regular muggle words if one of them ever discovered its existence. For centuries it believed to be lost, but now that these fools have it, it needs to be mine.
- “If this diary is so important to you my Lord, we will retrieve it” I say, bowing my head.
- “Thank you, Lucius. Now both of you, go. I don’t want you to waste any more time.”
After some short preparations, we find ourselves in Muggle London. Side by side we pass street after street without saying a single word to each other. Our mission goes smoothly. Of course no muggle safety precautions are as good as magic. The minute we have the diary, we apparate out of there faster than anyone can suspect anything.
Finally, when we are no longer near the location of the Museum we stop, simply looking at each other. At some point, one of us will have to say something. Feeling that I might have not been too just in my accusations, I start first.
- “I might have gone a bit overboard when I said that it was all your fault. I was not myself at that time.”
- “It was my fault. I should have never try to do anything without thinking of what it will do to you first.”
- “Cissy got scared when she saw so much blood in the shower, but essentially it was not the reason she… we lost that baby. You heard what the doctor said. I guess my bastard of a father made sure that her organs were not strong enough to carry a child, so I suppose it would just be a matter of time when it would finally happen.”
We both stay quiet for a while letting the words sink in. Having to say them out loud is harder than I ever thought it would be. Finally Severus looks at me, his eyes full of regret, self-loathing and pain.
- “I’m sorry. For everything. I never wanted for any of this to happen. You and Cissy are the closest thing to a family I ever had. And Bella… she was… I swear I never wanted to hurt her, or you. Any of you. ”
- “I don’t think she’ll be able to forgive you.”
- “I know. I wouldn’t have forgiven myself ether.”
For a few long moments silence starches out between us again. Words that we both wish we could say just don’t come out.
- “Will you return to the mansion?”
- “I don’t think it’s a good idea. I doubt that Cissy will ever want to see me again in this house.”
- “Cissy is… I don’t think she wants to see anyone right now, but I want you to know that you will always have a place in my house. It’s your home too, so if you feel like returning one day, feel free to do so.”
- “Thank you, I’ll remember that. For now though, I think I’ll just stay in Hogwarts. Let’s go, we need to return. The Dark Lord would not tolerate us being late from our mission.”
Taking a look around to make sure there are no muggles and it’s safe to apparate, I notice a small house. Without a second thought in mind I fix my eyes on the neatly decorated window. An image of a pregnant woman watering the flower pots on the windowsill, somehow brings a sad smile to my face. She reminds me Cissy in the garden. Gods, the happiness was so close, closer than I could imagine. I notice man’s hands wrap lovingly around her big belly as he nuzzles her neck, giving her a tender kiss. Just to think of it, that could’ve been me. Us. Somehow it feels almost impossible to tear my eyes away from the picture in front of me and engrossed in my own thoughts, I keep looking at them, smiling, until the man takes a step away from his wife, brings his head up and I find myself starring at the eyes of someone I wanted dead for so long.
The next moment feels like the time has stopped. I take a look around to see if Severus had already apparated away and find him by my side with his dark eyes fixed on the window, his knuckles white from the grip he has on his wand.
Few long minutes pass before James comes out of the house and time starts moving again. With a flick of my wand, the front door closes behind his back. My next incantation puts strong wards around the house. Now he’s scared, I can feel it. He tries to cast a spell, but I’m quicker. With a simple Expeliarmus, he is thrown off balance and the next second, my fingers wrap around the smooth surface of his wand. The next curse has Potter’s body immobilized and thrown down by my brother’s feet. With all the hate he feels at the moment, he lifts James off the ground with one hand and jabs the end of his wand into his neck with the other.
Potter pleads for his life, but his words are muffled and hard to hear. I take a look at the house and notice Lily, practically glued to the window, trying to break through the wards. Her eyes are red and I can almost hear her silent cries. For some reason, the picture of Cissy all covered in blood appears in front of me. Her cries about the child we lost. Tears, so much tears and pain. I close my eyes and shake my head to get rid of the image. It helps me see things clearer. Feeling something snap inside of me, I avert my gaze from the house and take another look at my brother.
- “Severus, please…” I put my hand on his shoulder and squeeze it a little. “They’re about to have a baby.”
James seems to take my words as the straw that will help him survive my brother’s wrath.
- “Yes, the baby. Please Severus, I want to see my son being born. Pleaseeee…”
His words get muffled again, as my brother tightens his grip around Potter’s neck. As much as he hates James at the moment, I can see a small bit of hesitation in his eyes and squeeze his shoulder again, before his hate for Potter overtakes him completely.
- “Let him go, Severus. You can kill this son of a bitch some other time.”
He hesitates, but shakes his head nevertheless.
- “I can’t let him go, Lucius. I wanted him dead for so long.” His grip gets even tighter and Potter’s pleading words turn to some weak attempts to catch his last breaths of air.
- “I know. I want him dead too, but you can’t kill him now, you need to let him go. Severus. Listen to me.” I shake his shoulder a little trying to get him out of the state he’s in. “Look at me brother, come on. Look at her.”
Finally he raises his head and takes a long look at the house before his grip of Potter’s neck finally relaxes.
Looking sick of disgust he feels for the man, Severus finally masters a few words.
- “When is she due?”
- “Any day now.”
- “I will see you in a week time, by the lake at the edge of the forest. I’m sure you remember the place.”
With that, he completely relaxes his hand and looks me in the eyes.
- “Let’s go before I give in to my urge and kill this scum in front of her.”
Few moments later we find ourselves before the Dark Lord. Our mission is over and after providing some details of it, we are let go till further notice. We both bow and take our leave. Upon exiting, I take another look at my brother. A myriad of emotions cross his features, no matter how strongly he tries to hide them. He’s hurting, I can feel it.
- “Severus, letting him go was a right thing.”
- “I don’t know about that.”
- “I think we need to talk about it?”
- “I need a drink.”
- “Let’s go home, we can talk there.”
- “What about Cissy?”
- “She’s… I doubt we’ll see her.”
He nods his head and we both apparate to the mansion. One drink turns into another until we are too drunk to hold the glasses. I see Severus pass out on the couch and feel like I’m about to do so myself. On shaking legs, I make my way to the door. Before I can reach it, the door opens and I see Bellatrix. I shake my head, trying to focus my vision.
- “Bella? What are you doing here?”
- “I’m here to see Severus.”
Her voice sounds gentle and my mind is too clouded by alcohol to express any form of protest. As if taking a peak into my thoughts, she adds “Don’t worry, I’m not here to harm him. Go, you look like you need some rest.”
Gathering the last coherent thoughts I mumble – “Severus… he didn’t mean to harm you. He never wanted to…”
- “Of course he didn’t. Go now, I’ll keep him company” she says, giving me a wicked smile. The next moment, I feel my body being levitated to the nearest couch where I pass out as soon as my head hits the cushions.
- 12
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- 14
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ONE LIFE TO LIVE