The Best Of... | By : T-W-O Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female > Draco/Hermione Views: 13807 -:- Recommendations : 1 -:- Currently Reading : 4 |
Disclaimer: I own nothing of HP nor do I profit in any way from these missives. I almost own the laptop I'm writing this fanfic on, tho'. |
Daily Prophet News Articles — Christmas Eve Edition
Saint Nicholas Responds To Grievance Filed By Elves
Adding to the challenges of delivering gifts to every good boy and girl, Saint Nicholas, also known as “Father Christmas”, finds himself in the middle of a work slowdown by his elven workers. The elven union E.A.R.S. (Elven Action and Reparation Society) has filed a grievance with magical authorities worldwide protesting working conditions including worktables above regulation height, lack of hand controls for work vehicles, lack of steps for urinals, and 24-hour shifts from September through Christmas Eve (Greenwich Mean Time). Saint Nicholas indicated that the slowdown, which “couldn’t have come at a worse time”, will mean many children will not receive their presents until Boxing Day.
S.P.A.M. Blasts Ministry Incompetence For Labor Unrest Among Elves
S.P.A.M. leadership released another critical missive blaming the Ministry of Magic for the late delivery of gifts to British children.
“Once again Mr. Shacklebolt’s brilliant leadership leaves our community in the lurch. The continued stranglehold on pure-blood assets means that legitimate businesses, capable and willing to respond to this unfortunate disagreement between Saint Nicholas and his employees, cannot do so. This time the consequences from the Ministry’s glacial and incompetent decision-making will be felt outside the magical world — poor muggle children will awake this morning to empty stockings and preset-less Christmas trees. Shame on you, Minister.”
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