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Envy and Manipulations	By : rrabbit Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female > Draco/Ginny Views: 8376 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters from it.... therefore I do not receive any payment for this writing.

Chapter List
- 14
- 15
- 16
"Where did you learn that curse?" he asks with a slender hand reaching into his pocket.

I watch his hand, fearing he will take out his wand and curse me until I go mad.

"Speak up," he snaps and I flinch away from him, still cowering on the floor like a trapped animal. I hate myself for the way I'm trembling and because I can't seem to look him in the eyes. I'm a coward. I hate that about myself too."Where did you learn such a curse?"

I don't say anything, I just stare at the golden thread on the expensive rug. I can feel that what little bit of patience he allows himself is officially running thin and when he repeats his question, I shrug one shoulder, the sleeve of my stupid golden dress falling down my arm with it.

"No," he says sharply as he takes a step towards me. I cower back and fumble with the sleeve, trying to pull it up without looking stupid. "You can not just shrug off that question. Where did you learn it?" he asks tightly.

I scoot back a bit more, closer to the fire, and it heats my back to an uncomfortable level as I glance around me, looking for a quick exit.

"That's not happening," he says when I spot an open door. He lifts his wand and it slams shut with a loud bang. I jump and feel my hands start shaking so I hold them together against my lap. "You had better answer my question now," he says, bending at the waist so he can see my face. "Use your words, Miss Weasley. I know you're not a mute witch."

I block my mind the best I can. Setting up wall after wall like Draco had shown me as I feel the slightest wind against my mind...

He's searching...

"I don't know," I lie with a whisper and he stares at me for a few more long moments before standing up straight with a sigh.

"You don't know," he says slowly like he was tasting the words, rolling them around on his tongue until he finally decides he doesn't like it. "I hardly believe that," he spits out and I finally find the courage to look at his face. The light from the sun is hitting his eyes in just the right way, making them crimson in color... almost purple, actually.

He's almost otherworldly in appearance and when he walks by the window, the sun illuminates him from behind making him look heavenly...

The sun...

"What time is it?" I ask in a panic as I search around for a clock.

We're in a rather large room with paintings of boring landscapes hanging on the walls and a collection of pipes resting on tables by the fireplace. I find no clock, but there are three large windows surrounded by thick maroon curtains that are pulled back by golden ropes tied in a bow. The place was a little gaudy, to be honest, but it reeked of wealth and old money.

"You don't get to ask questions until you answer mine," he snaps. I look away again and try to build another wall between myself and the constant intruder I find him to be. "I will only ask one more time. Where did you learn that curse?"

"A book," I lie again. I stare at his knees and then I become all too aware that of my submissive position on the floor.

I can't stay here.

I try to get up quickly, but I just turn into a fumbling stupid mess because I'm not used to moving with such a long skirt on. I stop dead when he holds out his hand for me to take and I eye it cautiously as I sit on my knees.

"I don't bite," he comments softly, his brows raised in slight amusement as he looks me over.

Don't accept help from a monster.

"I'm hardly a monster," he says, plucking the thought out of my head in an annoyingly Draco way. He bends down and grips my arm, pulling me to my feet by my elbow. "What an awful thing to think."

When he lets go, I rub my elbow and glare at the floor like a coward. The strap on my dress falls down again, but I don't even bother to fix it this time.

"Take a seat," he says as he motions to a brown suede couch adjacent to the chair he was sitting in earlier. I stare at the piece of furniture like it might eat me if I decide to sit on it.

Tom walks towards a black wooden buffet along the wall where there's a crystal decanter full of some amber liquid. He pulls off the stopper and pours himself a glass of whatever it is as I cross my arms.

"Sit," he says again as he lifts his hand.

I feel something tug me from the middle and I get forced down to that stupid couch by a magical force. When I try to move, I find that I can't. I'm stuck, like my legs no longer work and they're cemented to the cushion.

"Better," he says and I watch his back as he takes a sip from his glass.

I feel like I might have another panic attack and when I imagine all the terrible things he could do to me right now, I find my brow sweating and my breath coming out in short gasps.

"Now, about this book you claim you found. What was it's name?" he asks as he turns around and leans against the buffet. "Not that I don't believe you, of course," he adds with his head tilted. "I just find it odd that any book would have the details of a curse that hasn't been properly developed yet. Don't you find that strange?"

I swallow hard and nod my head.

"Very strange, indeed. I would dearly love to read such a book. Perhaps it could teach me a thing or two," he says as he holds the glass up to the light and he watches the liquid inside of it for a few moments before looking into my eyes.

I barely feel it, but I see him sorting through my mind... and I try with all my might to block anything that has Draco in it...he pauses for a moment on a memory of me and Draco kissing and then he starts searching again... He finds me practicing the fiend fyre curse in the Chamber of Secrets... answering those embarrassing sex questions to Myrtle... I block the folder. I erase it from my memory and I feel like I have a migraine when he finally pulls out.

"Well, that was interesting," he says and I burn in embarrassment at the things he just saw me talking about. "Where did you get that book?" he says seriously. "That notebook that had that spell in it?"

"I found it," I whisper and he narrows his eyes before sighing loudly.

I blocked the folder, but not my notebook.

"No matter," he says, sending me a little smile as he walks back to the chair. "You're obviously lying to me, but the truth always comes out in time... and I have much time to spare, as you well know."

I shiver when he sits down and he crosses legs, resting his glass on his knee. I know his body looks young, but when he looks at me, with the sun hitting his magicked body like it is... he's never looked older.

"I don't know what I should make of you," he says, tapping his fingers against the arm rest as he looks me over. "People fall around you like flies. Izador Rookwood dies in your presence, Odette McAlister is rendered handicapped under your watch, you curse Alecto Carrow with an unforgivable, and you try to kill me," he says as he motions to his chest. "With a very controlled fiend fyre curse, I might add." he clicks his tongue as he looks me over and then he taps his fingers against the arm rest again. "You are turning out to be a very dark witch, Miss Weasley," he says with a smug smile as he takes a drink. "Although, I will add that subtly isn't your strong point."

I exhale slowly and try not to look at him as I bring a hand up to my neck. I can feel myself getting blotchy because I'm all kinds of nervous. I kind of feel like a trapped animal before the slaughter.

"I can appreciate your gumption. It takes a lot of guts to do what you did last night," he says as I slouch my shoulders a bit more. "A lot of guts and stupidity," he says and my cheeks heat in embarrassment. "I have to remind myself that you are young," he says sagely and I blink hard a few times. "And that you were under the influence of a mind altering drug," he adds and I can't help it, I look at him. "That's true, is it not?" He asks as he sits back, making himself more comfortable. "A girl had given you a pill to take, you were not in your right mind when you threw such a savage curse at me."

I don't say anything and he places his glass on the table. He misses the coaster by a millimeter. I don't even know why I notice.

"Understand this," he says as he taps his fingers against his knee. "An attempt on my life is the worst kind of treason there is," he says, his top lip curling back into an ugly sneer that makes my heart freeze. "I am willing to overlook your act and chalk it up to you being drugged. Would you prefer that I believe you were in your right mind?"

I shake my head.

"I didn't think so," he snaps and I look at my lap.

I want this to be over. I want to go home.

I don't even have a home anymore and that's depressing.

My whole life is depressing.

When I find the courage to look at him again, he smiles. It's a twisted look on his face and his teeth are still rimmed in what looks like bluish black ink. It's a ghastly sight to see a Dark Lord smile.

"I see much potential in you, Ginevra Weasly," he says thoughtfully as he looks me over again. I feel like I'm on display at some demented fun house. "You are a powerful little witch and, although you have much to learn, I believe you could do wonders if you follow the right path. My path," he adds with an incline of his head to make his point clear. "It's not just your blood either, you understand. With your back story and your family breeding, I think you would serve my image well."

I crinkle my nose because what he just said makes me think of being bonded with him... and bonded with sex... and babies... and I feel like I might be sick.

"Charming," he adds flatly, like he knew what I was thinking and when I look at him, I realize he does. "Please," he says with an unpleasant little laugh. "You're still a child. I have no intention of bedding an underage girl. I don't pick the fruit before it ripens, Ginevra," he says and I feel my stomach turn.

This conversation is making me feel ill.

"I may look young now," he says as he motions to his face. "But I have the mind of a man well advanced in age. I am much older than you. To me you are an infant. Though..." he says as he looks me over, his eyes lingering on the bare shoulder where my strap fell. "I do see the appeal and judging from the things you were saying to that annoying little ghost, it's safe to assume that I'll have an experienced woman in my bed when the time is right."

I might die.

I almost panic when I think about what Odette had said in the hallway about being bred. "I..." I start and my voice sounds odd and young against my ears. "You aren't... going to... like..." I didn't exactly know what I wanted to say. "You aren't going to... kids..."

I sounded like a fool, but he smiled again.

"I may be a lot of things, but a rapist isn't one of them." He smiles. "I have other means of getting the things that I desire than using muggle force. You are quite right to fear me as you do. I can make you do anything I wish with out much consequence. I could make you do a great deal of things you never thought you'd do."

A second later I'm leaning back on the couch with him on top of me, tearing at my dress... and to my horror... I'm kissing him with equal passion, trying to unbutton his waist coat in my haste to get it off of him. Then he's on top of me, inside of me, all around me and I'm enjoying every minute of his violent love making.

Then I'm standing by the fireplace with a wand in my hand as my mother begs for her life and I don't even bat an eyelash as I throw the killing curse at her chest. I push her dead body into the fire after she slumps against the carpet. I laugh as she burns.

Then I'm on my knees telling Tom Riddle that he is the greatest Lord and Wizard the world had ever known and begging him to mark me with his symbol. I even hold out my arm and offer it to him as my eyes water with love and devotion.

It's enough to make me want to throw up and when I come back to myself, I scream a little in surprise. I'm still on the couch... still fully clothed and still cemented to the cushion. It's like I just woke up from the worst of bad dreams and I blink a few times before looking at Tom in all his dark glory, smirking at me from his chair like he never left it.

"The worst prison," he starts as he taps his temple. "Is the prison of the mind, but you would know all about that, wouldn't you?" he says and I frown as he snaps his fingers.

A frightened looking house-elf appears. It's skin almost white in color and it's eyes a milky blue. It looks like an albino elf and I wonder at the rarity of such a creature before it hands a blood splattered folder over to the Dark Lord.

The elf disappears as quickly as it came and I'm left with the devil as he crosses his legs again and opens the folder.

Why is there blood on it?

"I had to kill to get it," he says simply and my heart drops into my stomach at the casual mention of murder. "Let's see here..." he says as he thumbs through the pages. "Ginevra Weasley," he reads as I stare at the folder. "The patient continues to have night terrors three to four times a week that has brought about a nervous tick in waking hours. She appears nervous at all times and self harms by scratching her fingernails down her thighs until the skin breaks. Constantly talks about the boy in the chamber in relation to her nightmares. Blood and death mentioned with uncommon regularity for age. Talk of suicide. Suggested admitting to a ward for surveillance, but denied by parents."

"What are you doing?" I ask in a soft voice as he turns over another page.

"Prescribed Gelatorian for panic attacks. Patient seems to be improving with each session and the dreams have become less violent. The sexual undertones inappropriate for her age have disappeared completely. Still talking of the boy in the chamber... possible molestation?" he stops and looks at me. "There's a question mark here," he says as he taps the page. "Your therapist was taking a lot of liberties."

"My therapist?" I say weakly as I look at the folder. Are those Dr. Carol's? Obviously they must be about me... but did he kill her?

"Yes," he says simply like it was an unimportant matter. "Complains of headaches," he continues as I cover my mouth. "Severe migraines. Parents reported that they found the patient sitting at the kitchen table at three o'clock in the morning on July third. Every drawer and cabinet was open in the room and a row of knives were suspended an inch above the table with the blades pointing down by wandless magic. The patient appeared awake, but unresponsive to any address made by the parents. When finally provoked to speak, the patient would only repeat one phrase: The seventh moon is in the second house."

I gulp audibly and he looks at me with a tilted head before going back to the folder. I don't ever remember that happening to me.

"The patient doesn't remember anything from the night. When asked in session, all involvement was denied and possibility seemed silly to her. Possible sleep walking. When talking of the 'situation' in her first year at school, large chunks of time and memory are missing. Repressed memories evident. When I told her that there were things that her mind had hidden from her, she said she had no desire to find them."

I stare at him with wide eyes, trying to understand why he's reading any of this to me.

"On December 26th, while home on Christmas break, parents reported that the patient was found in the middle of the night in the attic. The lights were out and she was speaking to something in the corner of the room. The mother reported hearing her say something about children being drowned in a stream. When the parents turned on the light, the girl screamed so loudly it woke the whole house and every light bulb was shattered. The girl has no memory of it and can't recall who she could have been talking to in the empty corner."

"Stop it," I whisper because I don't want to hear anymore. It was bad enough living with the confusion when I was younger. I don't need to hear it all again through the writings of my dead therapist.

"When I asked her to walk me through the dream she had that night, she had a panic attack and had to be taken to St. Mungos for treatment. Fear more abuse occurred at Hogwarts than previously thought. Prescribed Vadium for a more heavy sleep." He pauses a second and licks his lips. "I could keep going," he says as he looks at me. "It really is a fascinating read."

I shake my head and hold back tears as I remember how messed up I was after the Chamber of Secrets. It was all his fault and I hate him for it.

"My favorite part is when you nearly killed your brother," he says and I shake my head again.

"That was an accident," I tell him because I know what he's talking about.

Ron and I had been horsing around and he had tripped and fell down the stairs. Because of everything I was going through, they all assumed I pushed him. It took Ron to finally convince him that it was just an accident. My parents didn't look at me for a week.

"I'm sure," he says with a smile as he closes the folder. "It amazes me that you were ever allowed out of your house after all this," he says. "Suddenly you turn fourteen and everything is fine? Your parents pull you out of therapy and the nightmares are gone. I find that odd," he says with a frown. "One would think that my presence would live with you a bit longer."

"I got better," I tell him, feeling the need to claw my fingers down my thighs again.

"Right," he says with a smile. "You and I are a lot more alike than you know," he says seriously. "People will always try to fix us because we're different, because we're powerful. But we're not broken. You can't fix us and the world will find that out soon enough."

Tom said that to me once in the Chamber.

Word for word.

That makes me think of blood on the walls of Hogwarts... the coldness of possession and the frightened howl of a wolf...It makes me think of the boy I had known in the chamber of secrets, how I had admired and almost loved him to a fault...How that boy used me and took me over until I thought I would disappear into nothing... and my nightmares... and Draco and Draco in my dreams...and sex and blood and kittens.

"Your thoughts are annoying," he says and I snap my head to his. "It's a jumbled mess," he says with his eyes narrowed. "Thoughts, fantasies, dreams, and memories all jump and twist around each other."

"Oh," I say because I didn't realize my mind was so hard to get through.

I'm pretty simple, actually.

"It's difficult to tie down what's real and what's fake in such a mind," he says flatly as he moves the folder to the table beside him. "That is why I loath being around hormonal teenagers." He brings his hand up and rests a couple fingers against his temple. "It can be tedious."

I nod my head like an idiot because that's all I can think to do.

Then he stares at me.

He stares at me forever and I start fidgeting uncomfortably as his odd crimson eyes dance over my face and down my dress, all the way to my feet in the golden slippers. My lips are really dry, so I lick them as he studies everything about me and I try like hell to block my mind, just like Draco had taught me.

"How do you feel about Draco Malfoy?" he says and it makes me jump.

"What?" I whisper softly with my throat feeling odd and tight.

"Draco Malfoy," he asks as he runs his fingers across his lips. "I fear, from the memories I have seen in your mind, that Mr. Malfoy has taken his orders to procure you to my liking a little more seriously than I would have liked. What are your thoughts on him?"

Can't he find that out for himself?

"I could," he answers my silent thought with a tilt of his head. "But like I said, the mind of a teenage girl is like stepping into the outer ring of hell. I can't tell what's real and what's... fantasy," he adds, leveling me with a dark gaze. "Not that I couldn't find out, of course," he says smugly. "I can do anything. I just don't want to take the time, you understand. I'm an important person."

Fantasy. God, has he seen some of the naughty thoughts I've had of Draco? I'm sweating now, and I bring a hand up to wipe my brow.

"Well?" he says after a while. "Answer me."

I shrug. "I don't know."

"What don't you know?" he asks sharply, impatiently, as I tug on the bodice of the dress. Mrs. Malfoy didn't tie it as tight as Pansy did that one night, but it feels like it's suffocating me now.

"I-I don't know," I say again and his eyes narrow into small slits as he picks up his glass again and downs it with a flick of his neck.

"I'm running low on patience with you," he says in a deadly voice. "I am trying to give you the benefit of the doubt."

Why?

I don't question it outloud and I start scratching my fingers against the top of my dress. "I don't know what I think of Draco," I say, and that's only half a lie actually. "I like him," I say honestly.

"You think he's attractive?" he pries with a brow raised and I nod my head quickly. "No matter," he says as he flips his hand dismissively. "You've had your fun. Just don't do anything stupid," he says flatly, leveling me with a hateful look. "You'll have no time with this foolishness when you're with me," he adds. "You will have no lovers under my watch."

What did that mean?

"I believe I stated that plainly enough. It doesn't bare repeating," he adds, answering my thought openly.

No lovers under his watch? I dread the day when he thinks I'm old enough.

"What should I do with you?" he asks, looking me over again with his chin in his hand. "I could lock you away," he starts after licking his teeth. "I could keep you forever in one room with guards at the door. You would never escape," he adds like it wasn't a big deal. "You would never leave and when you finally came of age, I suspect you would welcome my company after spending years alone."

I swallow hard.

"Would you like that?" he questions cruelly and I shake my head so hard that one of those pearl clips comes loose, making hair fall around my shoulders. "No?" he says with a tilted head.

"No, I would not like that," I whisper out weakly and he sighs loudly.

"How about this. How about I send you back to school," he says and I inhale a deep breath. "But after you undergo re-education. It tames even the wildest beasts, you know," he says and I starts fiddling with the grooves on my dress.

"What happens during re-education?" I ask in a small voice. That was my main plan to see my parents again, after all. Let's hear how foolish that stupid plan was.

"It's actually quite simple," he explains. "The core memories of the subject are erased. It's a very painful process as you can imagine and it takes a very steadied hand... but eventually it levels them out so they don't even flinch when the dementors take their soul."

"Dementors?" I whisper as I think of Neville and Seamus... and even, god help me, Theodore Nott.

"How else would we retract their souls?" he asks like I was stupid. "It makes them completely obedient and, with their core memories gone, they have nothing to be sad about. It makes them perfect little soldiers. I have half a mind to do it to everyone, but I find individual personality too appealing... to an extent."

"Why would you do that?" I ask, feeling so overwhelming sad and worried.

"I already explained it," he says like I was slow. "Were you not listening?"

"No, but that's... that's terrible," I say like it would have any effect on the person I was talking to. "That is the worst thing I've ever heard. Why would you do that to someone... to kids? That's horrible."

"So many adjectives you're using," he says with a laugh as I try to process what life without memories or a soul would be like.

I was always taught that it was the worst fate in the world to have a dementor eat your soul.

"I find that souls, in a concentrated form, may be good for powerful magic," he says. "It's been useful in more ways than I could imagine."

"You keep them?" I ask, my voice shaking and sounding whiny.

"Some of them," he says. "It depends on the person. The dementors and I have an understanding."

I didn't know one could have an understanding with such creatures, but I didn't dare question it as I brought my hand up to my mouth so I could chew on my nails.

"Do you want that? Is that what I should do?"

"No, please," I say quickly because I couldn't think of a fate worse than that.

"Then I'm at a loss. You obviously don't respect me or the place I have held you in. None of your peers have been able to turn your mind on the right path. Is see no other agreeable option."

He lifts his wand to his empty glass and it fills again with the amber liquid from the decanter. I've never actually seen someone use so much magic for such little things before.

"No," I say quickly, putting my hand down and leaning forward. I didn't want any of that. I just want things to be normal again. I want to be home with my family. I want to be safe. "Don't do any of that, please. Just send me back to school and I swear I will behave. I won't do anything I shouldn't."

"And you will be grateful for that I imagine?" he says, sipping his drink again.

I nod my head.

"I find that a grateful follower is the best kind," he says as he sets the glass back on the table. He stands up, towering over me as I look pleadingly up at him. "I am not such a cruel lord," he says as he brings his hand out and pets the side of my head like I was a puppy. "I believe that you will be obedient... even enthusiastic, on your return to Hogwarts," he says, still petting me. "As a token of good will on my part, I will release your mother from Akaban," he says and my heart soars at the thought.

My mother.

"She will be monitored, of course, but I will set her up in a very reasonable little flat, far away from the dank prisons and dementors that have been in her life up till now. Would you be grateful for that?" he asks seductively with a dark brow arched in question.

I nod my head again, staring into his eyes... almost hypnotized by the color.

"I'm sure you would," he says, pulling his hand back and placing it behind his back. "As I am sure such good fortune would motivate you to be a more agreeable citizen of my new world order."

"Thank you," I tell him, sounding sappy and everything that I hate.

"Yes," he says with a smug little smile. "I have been very merciful with you today," he says as he walks back to one of the large windows. "I don't want you to leave here thinking me weak, though," he says thoughtfully. "If you so much as step one toe out of line, your mother will be the first to die... but not the last," I repress the shiver the tickles my spine as he continues. "So, I would suggest always looking at me favorably and cease all your silly little plans of revolting against me. You know they're futile and will never work out the way you wish them to. I have eyes and ears everywhere, Ginevra. Even in your dreams," he says darkly and I lick my dry lips.

There's a heavy pause as he stares out the window and then he looks at me again.

"Now that we are friends again," he says, with another smug smile. "I would like for you to tell me where you learned that curse you used against me. I can't seem to place the thought in your mind... perhaps you forgot because I would hate to think you are purposely hiding the knowledge from me," he says darkly and I start to sweat again. "Well, my little lady?" he says after a moments pause and I hate the term of endearment from his lips. "What have you to say?"

Lie.

Lie well.

"I found it," I repeat and his expression becomes stoney in appearance. I sit a little straighter and lean forward to convince the king of liars that I'm telling the truth. "I really did, I swear. I found it in the bathroom on the third floor where the entrance to the Chamber of Secrets is located. It was there... in the chamber."

"Really?" he sneers, feeling the lie and I nod my head, sticking with it.

"I swear."

He narrows his eyes for a moment and then tries to ravage my mind once more. I block it.

I actually block it and he retreats from my mind with his eyes deadly. He opens his mouth to speak once more but the albino elf pops back into the room and bows low to the floor.

"What?" he snaps as the elf hands him a letter written on black paper.

He takes it from the trembling creature and his eyes scan the page quickly. Then his lip curls back in disgust as he balls up the paper and throws it into the fire. "Get Mrs. Davenport for my guest," he says and the elf nods before popping away. "Do not think for one second that you are ever away from my influence," he tells me, waving his hand in my direction. I can feel the spell lift from my legs and I long to stand and stretch them out. "Remember my kindness," he says flatly with a glare. "I will never be so understanding again."

With that he leaves and I start breathing so hard that I'm actually making noises with each breath. I slump against the couch and bring my trembling hands up to cover my face. Everything that I was holding in during the talk washes over me like cold water and I'm shaking uncontrollably. I feel like I'm having an asthma attack and I clench my eyes shut, trying to get my breathing under control in case he chooses to come back.

A few moments later, a tall woman walks into the room with sky high red heels on her feet and an air of importance about her . Not wanting to look anymore weak than I am, I stand up quickly and she looks me over with a judgmental eye. It takes me a few moments to become accustomed to her beauty and I blink a few times as she comes towards me with a polite smile turning her features soft. Anything has got to be better than being alone with Tom Riddle and I thank every god out there for whatever that letter was that took him away from me.

"You look very ill, indeed," she says in a posh voice as she lifts my sleeve back into it's proper place. "I feel like we should clean you up first."

"Who are you?" I ask in a shy little girl voice that betrays my fear.

She laughs at me for a while before taking my arm.

My stomach growls as she introduces herself as Ruth Davenport, Mistress of the Manor we are currently residing in. I try to be polite despite my unease as she ushers me into a large dinning hall, all the while giving me empty greetings and pleased remarks on my dress. I take a seat and she takes it upon herself to unravel my napkin and place it on my lap.

"Are you hungry?" she asks.

I don't answer her and she eyes me coolly as she takes a seat across from me. When the food appears, I realize how very hungry I am and, not wanting to do anything terrible like faint in front of this well bred woman, I grab my fork.

"It's a great honor, you realize, that Our Great Lord has chosen my home to have a meeting with you," she says and I nod my head, not listening. "I am very pleased with your presence," she adds with a smile and I look at her once before going back to the food.

I'm just thankful to be alive, and I tell myself that over and over again so I don't feel guilty for the cowardly way I conducted myself in the Dark Lord's presence.

I take a large bite from the omelet on my plate and practically inhale it in my hunger as Ruth watches me from the other side of the table with a brow raised. I bring my napkin up to my mouth and try to be a bit more civilized before downing my juice. I have no idea who she is and I have no design to ask her because I don't want to know. She's probably someone terrible who does something terrible in a terrible place.

I know one thing, though. I know that this Ruth Davenport woman makes me very uncomfortable.

Maybe it's the critical way in which she's viewing my every movement with her eyebrows slightly raised and an odd little smile on her face. Or perhaps it's because she is the most beautiful woman I have ever seen in my life.

Yes, that's probably it.

She looks ageless, somewhere between the age of twenty to forty five and her skin is dark and smooth, the color of chocolate and cream. I'm not exactly sure what ethnicity she is either... she might be black, Caucasian, Asian...Indian...middle eastern... anything, really. Whatever the combination, it's lovely and I look down at my own freckled skin before deciding that I have bigger things to worry about than my vanity.

"Are you alright?" she asks and my eyes snap to hers.

She has green eyes. Bright green, brighter and greener than Harry's even and her eyelashes are dark and long, curling at the ends. She seems very modern in dress, more modern than the classic Narcissa Malfoy. She's wearing a zebra printed blouse that has ruffles down the front and black skinny jeans that look like they were painted on. I could see her lacy black bra underneath the fabric of the top and she layered a few different necklaces made of silver and black beads.

It was a little intimidating, actually.

Her hair is black and short, almost as short as Draco's, and it's curled and styled about her head like a model in a magazine.

I look away quickly when her eyes snap to mine. I look like a freak staring at her, but I can't help it. She has a long neck and high cheek bones and full lips and a small nose... and...

God, I think I have a girl crush on her and I start shoveling eggs into my mouth again as I try to banish that inappropriate thought.

"You are quite uncouth," Ruth says.

"What?" I say with food still in my mouth and I could kick myself for it.

I might seem stupid right now, but I know what uncouth is.

"It's just, you know," she says as she looks me over. "I expected more. Not that you don't look lovely, of course," she says as I look down at my dress after swallowing a large gulp of food. "This has Narcissa Malfoy all over it," she says as she motions to me and I frown as I wipe my mouth off with the back of my hand. "I just thought you'd be a bit more..." she moves her hand around like she was trying to find the word. "Polished."

Polished.

I put my fork down and try not to blush as I run my tongue along my teeth, hoping that I don't have something stuck in them. "Don't get me wrong, you have a certain charm to you," she says, her voice sounds like ringing bells in the spring time and when she smiles it's like sunshine.

Jeez, my thoughts are starting to sound creepy.

"But even under all that Malfoy glitz and glamor I can see the simple country girl underneath."

I think I should be insulted. Should I be insulted?

"Narcissa really did go all out on you," she says as she eyes me over and I let my hands rest on my lap. I'm no longer hungry, believe it or not. "She busted out her grandmother's pearls," she says as she motions to the beads around my neck and I touch them with my fingers. "I wonder why," she says thoughtfully as she starts playing with the silver chain around her neck.

My fingernails are probably dirty.

I quickly put my hand under the table.

"Special Ginevra Weasley," she sings like it was a song and I scratch my neck nervously. "It looks like you were raised on corn and sunshine," she says with another smile and I furrow my brows.

Was that an insult too?

She squints her eyes as she looks me over and I bite my lower lip as I look out the window, finding the branches of the tree fascinating.

"I think you and I will get along well," she says. "After we brush off all of that farm living that clings to a person after a while."

"Huh?" I say, rather uncouthly and she gives me a patient smile.

"You used to work at the Hills, did you not?" she asks as she brings up her hand to rest against her chin.

She's wearing three silver bangles that clink against each other on her wrist.

The hills... Folk Hills... what people call it to make it sound posh.

"Oh, yes," I say, trying to be a little more polished about it. "I worked there over the summer."

"Thought so," she says with a smile breaking, showing a row of sparkling straight teeth. I go to take a drink of my juice again because my throat feels very dry. "I believe I've heard my son speaking of you," she says. I miss my mouth as I look at her and some juice dribbles down my chin and rolls to my chest. My ears turn red as I put the glass down and I fumble around with the napkin to clean it up.

I wish she wasn't look at me so closely.

"Of course, he never said anything directly to me," she says with a laugh as I try to clean myself up so I don't look like a clumsy child. "Teenage boys never tell their mother's anything."

"Who is your son?" I ask softly like a fool as I clean up my mess.

"Isn't it obvious," she says with a large smile. "I'm told he looks just like me," she says smugly.

It took me all of two seconds to realize who her son was.

When I was around Blaise Zabini I had the same thoughts. He was so beautiful he didn't even look human sometimes and it would make sense that this woman would be the one who gave him those good looks. In fact, the more I look at her, the more I see him in her features.

God.

"Blaise Zabini," she says with a sigh, figuring I didn't know. "I believe he may be a year or two older than you."

"I know him," I mutter softly.

"Then you can understand my confusion," she says as she motions to me. I look down at the juice stain on the top of my lovely dress. "You aren't exactly a great beauty."

Girl crush officially over.

I narrow my eyes and push my plate way. Now she's the one being uncouth and I would have told her so if I wasn't such a coward in fearing another private meeting with the Dark Lord.

"But like I said, there is a certain charm to you," she adds as she plays with one of her necklaces. "Something I can work with when you stay with me over Christmas."

"What?" I ask flatly, snappishly almost, and she raises a perfect eyebrow.

"You'll be staying with me," she says with an impish smile. "Over your winter holiday. Originally you were to stay with the Malfoy's and take classes under Narcissa, but plans have changed."

"Classes?" I ask sheepishly and she nods.

"You can't just be welcomed into society because you know the right people. There are things you must learn, of course. If you want to be a true lady, you have to know which spoon to use," she says and I let my mouth hang open in surprise at the revelation. "And when to close your mouth," she says and I snap mine shut quickly.

"I don't..." I was going to tell her that didn't want to stay here for one more moment, let alone the rest of my Christmas break... but I remembered my talk with the Dark lord and I kept my mouth shut. Not a toe out of line he had said and I believed him.

"Good, it's settled," she says and she stands up, looking at the clock on the mantle piece. "I should get you back to school. Our Lord was rather specific in his orders of getting you back by a certain time," she says and I stand as well. "Let me fetch you a cloak for the trip," she says as she snaps her fingers and a frightened house elf appears by her knees. This was a different one, not the albino elf I had seen in that odd room upstairs. "Get Ginevra my blue riding cloak please. I believe it will rain soon."

The elf disappears and when it comes back it's holding a very lovely cape made of a thick blue suede. Ruth takes it from the elf and walks towards me. She smells good, like some kind of expensive perfume, and I get a whole whiff of it as she puts the cloak around my shoulders. It has a gold lining and a fur collar to ward off the chill. I look down at the clasp as she snaps it together for me. A golden swan with a diamond eye.

It was fancy.

"There," she says with a pleased smile as she smooths out the material along my shoulders. "Perfect. Let's get you back then."

It was uncommonly bright outside, but Ruth Davenport had been right. Just before we made it to the Safe App zone on her property, the clouds covered the sun and it began to drizzle little droplets of rain. I was pleased with the cloak she loaned me more than ever as I wrapped it around myself and tried not to think of my terrible situation.

She Apparates us to the castle gate and, before I head inside, I start to remove the cloak.

She puts her hand on my shoulder to stop me.

"It's a long walk to the castle," she says as she motions to the long path I'll have to walk by myself. "Just give it to Blaise. He'll send it back," she says before disappearing.

I don't want to give it to Blaise. I don't want to talk to Blaise.

I want to talk to Draco. I need to talk to Draco.

I speed walk all the way to the castle and nearly run to my dorm. First order of business is taking off this ridiculous dress and when I get to the common room, Pansy is reading a book by the window. When she sees me, she looks concerned for a moment before she sees what I'm wearing and then she stands up with her eyes raking over my body.

"Where did you get that cloak?" she asks flatly.

I look down at the beautiful cloak and take it off. After everything that just happened to me that is not the question I expected her to ask. "Ruth Davenport let me wear it home."

"You were around Blaise's mother?" she asks sharply.

"I'm fine, by the way," I tell her as I level her with a cold look because she seems more concerned with what I'm wearing instead of worrying about my welfare.

I did try to kill the Dark Lord with a fire curse last night. Someone should be a bit worried about my well being.

"Obviously you are," she says as she looks at the cloak in my hands like it was a treasured artifact she wanted to touch. "Why did she give you that cloak?"

"It was raining when she brought me back," I tell her sharply and she blinks a few times. "She didn't give it to me. I'm going to give it back."

"Why would she give that to you?" she says again, glaring at the blue cloak in my hand like I had stolen it.

"I just told you-"

"Give it to me," she says flatly. "I'll give it back to Blaise."

"What... no," I tell her as I yank the fabric away from her. "Why are you being so weird?"

"I'm not being weird," she hisses and I give her a glare before turning towards the stairs.

"Yes, you are," I tell her.

I don't say another word to her.

I employee the help of Astoria to help me untie the dress and she does it without asking me anything about anything. I don't even care. I would rather not speak to anyone right now. I need to be touched and comforted. I really need Draco. I carefully take off the jewelry Narcissa had let me wear and I put it in a small box along with the lovely hair clips. I will give them back later, I decided, and I get dressed quickly in more casual clothes. I put that stupid cloak Pansy had spazzed over in a random plastic bag that I found under my bed before leaving to find my boyfriend. He can give the cloak back to Blaise if anyone can anyways.

When I leave the dorm, Pansy is still in common room, glaring at me the whole time I as exit the door on my hunt for Draco.

He's not in his room.

He's not in the boy's dorm.

He's not anywhere and I become frustrated almost to the point of tears when I enter the library to find him.

I don't find him, but I find Blaise there and I'm thankful for the crowd of people as I approach him. He has a few texts out in front of him and he's writing something down furiously with his quill.

"Hey," I say uncomfortably when I reach his table and he looks up with a his eyes lighting up in surprise. "Hey... do you know where Draco is?" I start by asking because he did see me naked and yeah...

"He was held back at the Manor," he says as he looks over my face. "He'll be back later tonight, I imagine."

That makes me feel uneasy. "Is he in trouble?" I ask uncomfortably as I lean over the table a bit so I can speak softly. I feel like someone just told me Christmas was canceled. I really need his company and reassurance right now.

"Why? Did you tell on him, Weasley?" he asks, his eyes dipping to the neckline of my shirt where he can... clearly see down. I stand up straight with a snap when I realize that and I feel a blush staining my cheeks. "He's not in trouble," he says. "I talked to him this morning... and I'm surprised you aren't in more trouble, by the way."

He flicks me a sly little glance and I shrug. "I guess he was in a forgiving mood."

"I wouldn't count on that," he says as he puts his quill down. I take the seat across from him as he sits back. "That Dark Lord is a lot like Draco," he points out. "There's a reason for every action. It's easier to attract flies with honey, is it not?"

"I don't want to question it," I say quickly because it was true. He could have easily killed me or my family members last night and I walked away with my head still intact and my Mother possibly free of prison.

When the weight of the situation actually hits me all at once like a ton of bricks, I just kind of stare at the window like a zombie... just staring... seeing nothing... hearing nothing... feeling nothing...

"Weasley!" I snap out of my melancholy state and I blink at Blaise. "I just asked what's in the bag?"

"What bag?" I whisper and he nods to the plastic bag in my hand.

"That sketchy looking bag you're carrying."

"Oh," I whisper softly as I place it on the table. "I have something of yours," I tell him as I reach into it and pull out the cloak. "Well, it's your Mom's actually. She said that you would send it back to her."

He eyes the cloak for a moment before taking it from me and folding it on the chair beside him.

"She gave you this to wear?" he asks as he plays with the golden swan clasp.

"Yes," I say as I try not to think of what happened earlier. "It was raining and cold this morning... your Mom is very unpleasant by the way," I tell him with a frown as I remember my conversation with her and he snorts as he shuts one of his books.

"What a lovely thing to say, Ginny," he says, making a mockery out of my name.

"She called me uncouth," I tell him, feeling anger in my heart at the word. "And I'm fairly certain she called me ugly."

He laughs as he looks at me with his golden eyes twinkling. Yes, he looks just like his freaking mother. "I highly doubt she called you ugly," he says with a smile and I shake my head.

"She didn't exactly say ugly," I explain. "But she hinted pretty heavily towards it. She said I had a certain charm to me and something about being a country girl... expecting more and not a great beauty," I tell him as I go through the conversation in my mind. "I'm pretty sure she kept on insulting me, but in a weird polite way. It was really uncomfortable"

"My mother would never call a girl ugly unless she was really unfortunate looking and, even then, she would never say it to the girl's face. She was raised like a proper lady... she talks behind everyone's back," he says with a wolfish grin like his comment was funny. I don't smile. "You seem to have all your teeth and your eyes shoot straight. I would call you far from ugly."

"Thanks... I think," I tell him and he laughs.

"Or..." he says, trailing off with an annoying smirk on his face.

"Or what?' I snap.

"Or she saw you as a threat," he says and I raise an eyebrow.

"A threat to what?" I snap and he shrugs.

"It is curious, I would like to point out," he says as he touches the fur collar on the cloak. "That she gave such an uncouth country girl her best cloak to wear home in the rain."

"What's so curious about that?" I ask as I watch his fingers move along the seam of the cloak.

"My mother is hardly that charitable," he answers and I frown.

"Stop talking in riddles," I tell him in frustration and he laughs at me again before looking at the cloak with his eyes dazed.

"My mother has always favored winter weddings," he says in an odd voice. "She's been married seven times already, you see," he adds with his brows raised. "She's kind of a pro at it."

"Okay?"

"She married my father in this cloak," he says as he taps the swan. "My families crest," he explains and I feel confused.

"What does any of that mean?" I ask seriously and he smiles at me again, his eyes glowing yellow in the sun.

"That means," he says with a sinister smile as he puts all of his things in his bag.

"Means what?" I question impatiently because he's taking too damn long to answer that question.

He smirks at me.

"Mother approves."

"Do you think he was being honest when he said he would let my mother go?" I ask seriously.

"I don't know," Draco answers softly and I furrow my brows. "He has said a great many things before that have been lies... but I will say that he did not lie about killing her if you displease him. He will use your feelings as leverage. It's how he works."

"I thought he was going to kill me," I tell him as I look out the window.

It's raining and I follow a few droplets of water as they race across the glass. I run my fingers up Draco's forearm and I lean down to kiss his skin after the raindrops combine against the window and form a speedy torpedo heading towards the corner of the frame. I bring my hand up and start playing with his watch as I try not to think about how scared I was.

"I was so frightened." I lick my lips.

We're in a random study room in the Slytherin Boy's dorm that he was able to clear out for the night. Draco said it was one of the only places we could be alone with out being found out because he feared that his room was bugged by the Dark Lord after the Halloween dinner. That makes me feel guilty and I hate that I seem to ruin everything for everyone. As I think that, Draco brings his hand up to my hair and he starts combing through it with his long fingers. I nuzzle against his chest again and curl into him a bit more.

I'm laying in between his legs, using him like he was a piece of handsome furniture. He's actually quite comfortable. He's wearing a navy and green argyle sweater that's really soft and warm and he unbuckled the belt on his khaki slacks for me when I decided to lay against him. I thought that was a gentlemanly thing to do. I really needed to be cuddled after the time I had and I'm thankful for his company because I've been deprived of it since we came back from the Halloween dinner from hell. I rest my head against his chest as he plays with my hair and I listen to his heart beat as it thumps against my ear.

I don't why I find that so soothing, but I do and I close my eyes, taking in that wonderful cologne he always wears.

"I don't know what you were expecting," he says, his voice deep and gentle as he draws up his knees, caging me against him in a way that makes me feel safe. A feeling I find myself missing every so often this year. "You can't just do things like that and get away with it."

I nod my head. "I wasn't thinking," I admit as I tilt my chin up to look at him.

I just got done telling him everything that happened with the Dark Lord and Ruth Davenport. He was uncommonly quiet throughout the whole thing and I even had to ask him if he was still listening a few times because he barely made one noise during it all. The only part I omitted was when the Dark Lord read from the folder that he stole from my therapist. That was classified information and no one needed to know it.

"I didn't want him to kill McGongall. I really liked her," I say as I think of the teacher I had adored so much. "What happened?" I ask as I sit up a bit and he lets his hand fall from my hair. "After I left... what happened to her?"

He stares at me for a few moments before shaking his head and my eyes water. "I'm sorry," he says gently and I bury my head against his chest again, wrapping my arm around his torso so I can get closer.

What I did was pointless. It did nothing but get me in trouble with the worst person in the world.

"Why?" I ask sharply. "She was good person... a good teacher... a pureblood," I add quickly because that seemed to be the most important thing to everyone there.

"This is war, Gin," he says against my hair as I glare out the window. "It doesn't matter if someone is good or not. It just matters who's side they're on."

"I hate the Dark Lord," I say spitefully. "I hate him so much. I think I'll die if he ever tries to touch me."

"It won't get that far," Draco says lightly as he strokes my arm like he was completely sure of it.

"He knows you're my lover," I tell him as I nuzzle against his chest. "In fact, that's what he called you. It was disgusting to hear him say that word," I tell him with my face in disgust. I can't even describe how terrible he made the word lovers sound. "I was trying so hard to block my mind and hide anything that would incriminate you, but I let a few things slip. He saw us kissing... and me talking to someone about having sex with you. He told me I could have my fun while I could because when I was finally with him there would be no more of that. It makes me feel sick just thinking about it."

"Lucky for you, I am a jealous lover."

I don't say anything for a while and I hug him tight as I watch the rain beat against ground.

"Do you think I'm selfish?" I ask softly as I think of Pansy and I feel him run his chin over the top of my head.

"No," he says simply. I lick my lips as I tap my fingers against the window pane.

"Pansy said I was selfish. She's been so mean to me lately," I admit and Draco sighs loudly, his chest rising with the movement.

"She's been on edge recently," he says, his chest rumbling against my ear.

"So, you don't think I'm selfish?" I say with a frown as I draw a circle on the window. He takes my hand with his left and kisses my palm.

"I think you're young," he says after pulling my hand away. I tilt my head up to look at him.

"You're only a year older than me," I point out. He brings his hand up to my face, brushing some hair away from my cheek.

"I know," he says as he studies my face. "But we grew up in different worlds," he says and I actually sit up, crossing my legs as I face him. "I don't think you're selfish," he says as he puts his hand out and taps my knee. "But I don't think you weigh your actions beforehand very well."

"What do you mean?"

He cracks his knuckles and looks out the window. "You're like every other bleeding heart Gryffindor," he says and then he looks at me again. "You have a lot of gumption," he admits. "You're brave and you do things on impulse, but you rarely think about the consequences."

"I think of the consequences," I tell him with a pout and he raises an eyebrow.

"No, you don't," he says seriously. "I'm impulsive too, Ginny," he says. "There's nothing wrong with it, you just... don't take into account the big picture. It's not your fault. You've lived a very sheltered life. And that's okay."

I slump my shoulders and bit and cross my arms.

"Like what you did at my mother's dinner... that fiend fyre curse? He could have killed you right then and there...did you realize that?"

"I just wanted to help McGonagall..." I mutter in a whisper and he sits up a bit straighter.

"I know, and that's good," he says as he grabs my hand. "But now, the Dark Lord knows that a controlled fiend fire curse is out there. He knows that the science has been completed and he knows you somehow learned to do it... There was a section at the Department of Mysteries that was studying that curse. I interned at the ministry over summer. He'll put the pieces together.. He's going to ask questions and all those questions are going to lead right back to me."

"I didn't..."

"You didn't think of that, did you?" he asks softly.

"No," I admit. "I lied to him. I told him I found a book that had the curse in it. He didn't believe me but he didn't find out anything else."

"Rest assure that the subject didn't die when your conversation with him ended. He will keep pursuing the answer until he's satisfied with it's honesty," he rubs his forehead like he had a headache and then he looks at me with his arms crossed. "I try to be very understanding of how... naïve you are," he says and I crinkle my nose at the name.

"I'm not naïve."

"If you're not naïve, then I don't know what else to call it," he says seriously. "I find it hard to believe that you would do half the things you do if you didn't know any better. You rarely take my feelings into consideration."

"That's not true," I tell him because sometimes I feel like he's the end all, be all in my life and all I think about is him.

"Yes, it is," he says flatly and I exhale slowly, turning my head away from him, back to the window and the rain.

I don't say anything. I want to fight him on this... but I don't even know what I want to say. I guess that just kind of proves his point in a way.

I scratch my neck before taking his hand and looking at his silver watch. I don't even know how he tells the time with this thing... it looks complicated.

"Ginny," he says to get my attention and then I glance at him. "Do you think I'm wrong?"

I don't answer and he sighs.

"The first time I took you to a party at my families summer home, I caught you grinding against some guy. That was the first time a lot of my people had met you, and you were dry humping someone else."

"I apologized," I tell him softly, feeling guilty all over again but remembering how rough he was with me afterward. "I was drunk and I said I was sorry."

"I know you did," he says and then he pushes his sleeves up to his elbows. "Then you made out with Zabini knowing full well how pissed off it would make me."

"I was mad at you," I say in a small voice, realizing now what a terrible decision that was.

"Mission accomplished if you wanted to hurt me, Ginny. The thing is, no matter how upset with you I was, I would never kiss someone else."

"But, you were lying to me... and I was mad."

"That only makes it worse. That it was revenge of some sort." he says as he shakes his head. "And you know that Zabini desires you."

I shake my head. "He's disgusting," I say with a scowl and he raises a brow.

"You lead him on," he tells me with his voice dropping into a rather hateful tone. "That's another thing that makes me mad."

"I do not," I tell him, my temper rising as I pull my hand back. "I can't stand him."

"That's not true. You constantly seek out his company with out my permission, or knowledge, I would like to point out."

"I don't need permission to talk to anyone."

"Come off it, you would be pissed if I was constantly alone with another girl."

"I'm not constantly alone with Zabini..."

"I specifically told him not to talk to you, but you've cornered him for information when you could have just talked to me."

"That's not..." I don't know what I wanted to say. True? Was it not true? I don't know.

"You kissed him, Ginny, and now all of his thoughts are dominated by you. He eye fucks you all the time, but you do nothing to spur his interest. How am I supposed to feel about that? Every time I find out you've been alone with Zabini I have to ask myself, does she want to kiss him again? Every time you 'comfort' someone like Dean Thomas I have to wonder... does she want to fuck him? Why would she be touching him like that? Why does she seek out their company and not mine. Doesn't she love me? Why would she tell me she does if she acts like such a fucking tease to everyone else."

"Draco..."

"I know when you're attracted to someone," he says flatly. "Did you ever wonder why it never burned when you were practically on top of Dean Thomas but when you barely touched Harry Potter it threw you two feet back. Didn't you ever think how upset it would make me to realize you were attracted to one of my friends in that way as well?"

"I don't like Zabini," I reassure him and he narrows his eyes.

"If you get mad at me, are you going to go sleep around behind my back to get back at me?"

"I can't even..." I was going to point out that the bond would make it impossible for me to cheat like that, but he cuts me off.

"That shouldn't be your only reason," he snaps harshly and I back down.

"I have forgiven you a million times even though you know how you drive me mad, how jealous I get. I told you all of that, but I keep holding myself back because I know you don't mean it. I know you don't know any better. I tell myself that you're young and inexperienced in a relationship with a person like me... but some times I get so angry I feel like I might kill someone. Someone I need. Someone like Blaise who is too fucking important right now for me to just off because my girlfriend doesn't seem to care that he's looking down her shirt. I know the world is scary for you and I am trying to be understanding, but you have to realize I'm in this too and you never think of my feelings. You have to meet me half way."

"That's... That's not true," I tell him, his words weighing heavily on my shoulders. Aren't I the one who is always upset with him? He never tells me anything... but... "I think about you all the time. I think about your feelings..." I tell him. "I love you," I add lamely and he stares at me for a few moments before leaning back and crossing his arms again.

In fact, to show him, I get on all fours and lean over to kiss him with my back bowed and my hands supported against the bench. I slip my tongue against his and we snog for a little bit before I pull back, licking my lips to let the taste of him linger there.

"I don't think you're selfish," he says again, looking out the window. "I just think you don't see much outside of your reach."

"You don't think that applies to you either?" I ask softly, almost timidly as I look down.

"I'm as selfish as hell. I won't deny that. I know what I am... but the difference between you and I is that I always know what I'm doing. I know how it will effect people but I do it anyways."

"I'm unsure of my actions," I tell him honestly, trying not to automatically run on the defensive. "I don't mean to hurt your feelings or make you upset. I'm sorry," I tell him as I blink a few times, my confusion making me hesitant. "Maybe you're right," I say with a worried frown.

"Maybe," he says softly as he pulls me against him again and I hold him tightly against me. "Zabini is good looking, but that's about all he is," he says and I make a face. I don't want to talk about him anymore. "Remember that over this winter break. No matter how sweet his words can be you should keep in mind that he will never be able to give you what I can give you."

"What's that?" I question softly.

"Everything," he says and I feel my heart thump. "I can give you everything and anyone else, especially Blase, can only give you a second rate cheap version of it. Trust me on that," he says and I lean up to kiss his cheek.

"I don't want anyone else," I feel the need to point out again and he nods his head before a silence falls between us.

Then my eyes water and I start crying out of no where like a freak. "Why are you crying?" he asks and I shake my head.

"I don't know," I admit. "Everything... I guess..." I say with a sob as I pull him close and cry into his sweater.

I realize I've become a terrible person who cried all the time, but I couldn't help it. I was too afraid... I was too sad... and I was too messed up to not cry. Draco didn't say anything more as I sobbed against his chest. He just held me a bit tighter and ran his lips over my head, gently kissing me every once in a while as I let all my misery fall out of me like a waterfall.

It was pathetic, really, how much and how long I cried. I just couldn't stop. There was a moment there where I feared I would never stop crying. I would just go through life constantly sobbing against someones shoulder as the circumstances of my life, that were so out of my reach, took their toll me.

"Sweetheart," Draco whispered after a lifetime of me crying. "Don't be sad. Your life won't always be so frightening for you," he says as he squeezes my arm. "I promise you that."

There was a very real possibility that Harry... and Draco... wouldn't succeed in their endeavor to kill the Dark Lord. Where would that leave me if they were found out... or if they changed their minds on the matter? I got a pretty good glimpse of it at the home of Blaise's mother and I think I would rather die than live like that.

"Harry isn't dead, is he?" I ask fearfully when I remember his wand lying on the dinner table at Malfoy Manor. "He didn't kill them?"

"No," Draco says flatly. "He did not... but he thinks he's close."

"I want this all to be over," I admit softly.

"I have no intention of joining the army," he says and I remember what we had been told earlier in the year. That once we graduated all the boys were required to join the army and commit to three years of service. "My plans should come to fruition by the first of the year."

That was pretty soon, actually.

"Don't die," I tell him seriously.

That suddenly became a very real fear of mine. What if he died or was killed if the dark lord heard his plans? What would I do?

He snorted like that was funny.

"We should go out flying," he says thoughtfully and I frown.

"It's raining," I say as I tap the window again, trying to let my tears dry and willing no more to come.

"So?" he says with a shrug. "No one will watch us," he points out. "Come on," he says as he kisses the top of my head. "I know you haven't flown in months. It could be fun."

I let a little smile come to my face as I pull back so we both can stand. "Yes," I say with a head nod realizing I haven't flown in ages and I really would like it. "Yes, it could be," I say, my mood automatically brightening.

I quickly put on my shoes and then I watch Draco as he sits down to tie up his leather desert boots. I sigh softly to myself as I look him over. He's always so well dressed. I look down at my own outfit with a frown as I pull on the end of my shirt. I always look so shabby next to him. I'm wearing a long t-shirt that Charlie got me last year for Christmas and a pair of black leggings. Romilda Vane told me that they weren't pants so I shouldn't wear them as such, but I wanted to be comfortable and now I wish I would have dressed up a little bit for him.

"Ready?" he asks once his shoes are done up and he looks at me expectantly.

I let go of my stupid stripped shirt. "Do you like the way I dress?" I ask self consciously. It was absurd that I even cared, but I couldn't help my trivial thoughts that came and went so quickly, over lapping with the darker situations that dominated my days.

He laughs a little. "What are you talking about?"

I look down at my outfit again and then to him. "The way I dress?" I say with a frown. "Do you think I look... I don't know," I shrug my shoulder and pull on my shirt again. "Would you prefer it if I dressed more like Pansy and Daphne?" I question softly and now it's his turn to frown. They were always so well dressed and so put together... like Draco.

"I would like you in anything you chose to wear," he says as he stands and walks towards me.

"That's not what I asked," I say with a pout because it wasn't and I needed a solid answer, not just the automatic boyfriend answer that every guy resorted to.

He gives me a funny kind of smile. "You know me better than that," he says, giving me a humored look. "If I wasn't pleased with the way you dressed, I would have told you. It's not in my nature to spare feelings when it comes to such things. And, even though I do play favorites when it comes to you, rest assured that I would tell you if I hated something you were wearing. Does that answer please you?"

Perhaps he's right.

The admission did help my mood and I gave him a smile when I realized his belt was still undone. He smirks when I pull him to me by his belt loops. "Can't have you going out looking like a bum," I tell him as I start to buckle it for him.

He laughs a little as he watches me. "I would remove your hands from that part of my anatomy or we'll never leave this room," he jokes and I wink at him before pulling back.

"I don't have five minutes to spare. I want to fly," I tell him with a laugh before leaving the room.

He's on me a second. "Five minutes?" he says in disbelief. "That's how long you think my love making lasts?" he asks. He walks beside me as we make our way through the common room.

"Love making?" I laugh at the words and he wiggles his brows when I glance at him. "Is that what the young kids are calling it now-a-days?"

"What else should I call it?" he asks with a smirk. "Making Ginny scream?"

I back hand his arm and he laughs as we leave the dorm. "Meet me outside," he says as he looks around the hall to see if we're alone. "Under the arch by the stands. I'll bring riding gear."

"Alright," I nod my head and let him land a quick kiss against my lips.

"Five minutes," he mutters with a head shake. "Honestly," he says with an eye roll. "You hurt my pride." I grin at him like an idiot as he walks off.

I wait a few moments, watching him walk away before heading outside. It's cold, I should have brought a coat or something. I debate whether I should head back inside to get one, but stop when I see Draco walking towards the archway with two brooms under his arm and a bag in his left hand. When he gets closer, I meet him half way and hold him against me.

"It's cold," I point out and he nods.

"Indeed it is," he says as he pulls back to open his bag. "I brought you this to wear."

He hands me a hooded sweat shirt and I give him a grateful smile as I put it on and zip up the front. It smells like him and I inhale against the fabric before taking the broom Draco gives me.

"Do you just want to fly around?" he asks as he hands me a pair of riding gloves and goggles. "Or do you want to play a game?"

"Just fly around," I tell him honestly as I put the riding gear on and then I straddle the broom. "Are you sure this okay?" I ask worriedly before I take off. "No one will see?"

"If they do," he starts as he puts on his gloves. "You know how good I am at making people convinced to forget it."

I nod my head and a second later I take off. It's raining pretty hard as we fly over the lake and the forbidden forest, but I don't even care. I dive down among the trees with Draco close behind me and I even close my eyes for a few moments as I give into the sensations. The pleasant sensations of flying that I haven't felt in a very long time.

In fact, it was during the flight through the forest that I closed my eyes once more and then, almost immediately, ran into a tree. I was pushed off the broom from the impact and I fell against the forest floor with a thump.

I wasn't hurt, just the wind was knocked out of me and my pride was deeply wounded. I cover my face with my arm as Draco approaches on his broom. I'm completely mortified when he reaches me and I refuse to get up because I would probably just melt in embarrassment.

"Are you okay?" he asks in a panic as he kneels beside me with his goggles at the top his head, pulling his hair back.

I remove my goggles and stare up at him, the trees protecting us from the rain.

"I'm uncouth," I tell him with an embarrassed frown as my cheeks glow red.

When I look at him, I can tell he's trying to hide a smile and I know he would really like to laugh at me right about now. "How did you manage to run into a tree?" he asks as he helps me to my feet. I go to retrieve the broom that, thankfully, didn't break into a million pieces from the collision. "I know you're a better flier than that."

"I had my eyes shut," I mutter in a small voice and then he really does laugh.

"Silly girl," he says as I pick up the broom.

Upon closer inspection, I realize that the wooden broom is cracked down the middle and I cringe as I look at the damage. "I think I broke your broom," I tell him with regret as I get on it and see if it will fly. It doesn't move. The magic has been lost and I look at Draco apologetically. "I'm really sorry," I tell him as he walks towards me to inspect the damage himself.

"It's alright," he says with a shrug as he puts the broom against the tree. "It hardly matters. What's a broom?" he asks as he looks at me with a smile. "Are you alright?" he asks again, walking closer to me and touching my arm. "Does anything hurt?"

"Just my pride," I admit and he laughs a little. I look at the broken broom and shake my head. "I break everything now it seems," I tell him with my arms crossed and he gives me a warm look as he kisses my cheek.

"Come on," he says as he picks up his own broom and gets on. "Let's head back."

I nod my head and climb on behind him, wrapping my arms around his waist and leaning against him. I send one more sad look to the broken broom before Draco takes off towards the sky. I close my eyes and lay my head against his back as he flies us out of the forest.

"Can we not go back to the castle right away," I whisper against his ear. He nods. "Let's ride around," I tell him.

He listened to me and we finally stopped flying an hour later. We found shelter under one of the canopies in the old Ravenclaw stands. I was soaking wet and shaking as I climbed off Draco's broom, but I was feeling better. I loved to fly, even if I was in the back seat it was nice to just let go. Draco put the broom on one of the bleachers, removed his goggles, and stuffed his riding gloves in his back pocket as I watched him. I impulsively pulled him to me and kissed him when I got his attention again.

He seemed surprised for half a second before deepening the kiss and I brought a hand up to his neck, letting my fingers thread through his hair. We kissed like that for a good while until he pulled back and smiled down at me.

"That was sweet," he said with his brows raised and I placed a kiss at the corner of his mouth before he sat down.

I took a seat beside him to absorb his body heat. Draco always ran warm and I was grateful for that fact as I nuzzled closer to him.

"Thanks," I say softly as I look out at the rain pelting the opposite stand... the stand that used to be red and gold but had been painted green to reflect our new school colors. "It felt good to fly," I admit with a little smile as I go over the dips and turns in my mind.

"I agree," he says with sigh. "I don't have to think about anything," he admits and then he turns his body, straddling the wooden bench so he can see me better.

I give him an odd look and put my hands inside the pockets of the hoodie I borrowed from him.

"I have a serious question for you," he says and I raise a brow.

"Yeah?" I say uncomfortably as he takes something from his pocket.

It's the bracelet he had given me over the summer. The bracelet I thought was the greatest gift ever given to me and the same one I could never take off... Until Mrs. Malfoy removed it like it was nothing. He lays it on the bench between us and I stare at it.

"Do you want to be mine always?" he says flatly.

"Always?" I repeat with a little laugh, thinking it sounded odd.

He doesn't laugh or even crack a smile. He just stares at me with his eyes slightly narrowed as the rain beats down outside.

"What do you mean?" I ask after an awkward silence and I pull my hands from the pocket. "Always?"

"I have tunnel vision when it comes to getting things that I want and keeping them that way," he says and I furrow my brows. "I'm giving you a very small window of opportunity," he says as he pushes the bracelet towards me. "Maybe I'm having a lapse in judgment," he says softly, almost to himself as I study his face.

His hair is drenched from the rain and a mess about his head and his cheeks are flushed from the ride we just took.

"It won't be easy," he adds seriously. "Being with me. You know how I am now..." he stops and trails off and he sneers a little to himself before looking out at the stands. "It won't get better. This is how I am and how I act. This is how our relationship will be. I can't help it."

I raise an eyebrow.

"I like order," he says as he looks to me again. "Everything has a purpose and everything has it's place. I've had my future set out for me for a very long time and I won't deviate from that plan."

"We're still young, Draco," I point out worriedly. "I don't think we need to have this conversation right now."

"Yes, we do," he says sharply and I blink in surprise. "I won't have this talk with you again," he says and I turn my body towards him.

"Why not?" I say with a frown. "That's not fair. Too much stuff is going on. I can't think that far down the road right now."

"I can," he says flatly and he taps the bracelet again. "And you will. Do you want to be with me or not?"

"That's not fair," I mumble. I put my hand on my neck and stare at the bracelet. "Well... what are your plans?" I ask seriously and he raises a brow.

"Once the Dark Lord is dead, the government will try to go back to what is was before he was resurrected, but there will be a lot of internal fights," he says and I start biting my nails. "I want this all done by the end of the year so I can go to University instead of enlisting in the army," he says. "Once I'm done with my education I'm going to work at the ministry."

"Doing what?" I ask and he raises a brow.

"What I do best," he says. He reaches towards me and pulls my hand away from my mouth. I look at his eyes and he raises a brow. "Telling people what to do."

"Do you have a plan for me too?" I ask cautiously when he lets go of my hand and he smiles a bit.

"Of course, but it's all centered around being mine," he pushes the bracelet closer to me again so it's right against my leg. "I won't force you to wear it again," he says. "But I would be lying if I said I wouldn't care if you didn't."

"What's my plan?"

He stops for a second and watches my lips before raising a brow. "You'll finish school and then go to the same university as me. You can major in whatever you want," he adds like I wouldn't object to him just choosing my college like it was his decision to make. "You'll have to get a degree in something. Education, or the allusion of one, is always important. After that we can have an official marriage. Obviously we're already bonded but this way my mother will have pictures to show to her friends," he says with an eye roll. "You'll also have to legally change your last name," he says and I just stare at him.

"You can write all day with out the burden of having to get a job to afford to live. We'll settle down somewhere in the north and have children... two possibly three..." he says thoughtfully and I raise my brows at the dull way in which he's speaking of this made up life he's obviously been thinking over.

"Two possibly three..." I trail off and he nods his head.

"No less than two, no more than five," he says seriously and I feel weird about this. "You never want to have too many children or two few when you're in the spotlight."

"Spot light..." I repeat with my throat feeling odd.

"You'll have to take public speaking courses. I suspect you'll have to make a speech or two when I campaign."

"Campaign..." I'm starting to sound like an idiot, but I just can't get my thoughts in order.

"I think people will love you. They can relate to you," he says. "Your humble upbringing and family life will endear you more as it has endeared me," he says, giving me a little smile that usually melts my heart, but right now I'm just... confused... "I will admit that I thought of living the life a gentleman and not worry about working, but I don't like to stay idle. With your station it would be quite accepted for me to enter politics and you are so sweet," he says as he takes my hand and kisses my wrist. "I will enjoy coming home to you each night."

"What if I don't want any of that?" I question and I watch as he clenches his fist against his knee. I could have had bigger plans than just marrying and having babies. I knew I always wanted to be a writer... but what about if I wanted to travel and live in France for a year? There was a good chance I wouldn't actually do that, but with Draco's strict 'rich house wife with a pointless degree' sounding plan, I would never be able to do what I wanted. "What if I say no?"

"Then you say no," he says flatly, trying to hide his anger at the statement.

"What about if I change my mind after this window of opportunity?" I ask him.

"I told you this is the first and last time we'll be having this conversation."

"Things change all the time, Draco," I tell him. "I'm in this relationship too. It can't just be you calling the shots all the time."

"Stop talking back to me," he snaps and I narrow my eyes at the snappish way he's speaking to me. He inhales a large breath and then tries to level his voice. "Do you think you'll stop loving me tomorrow?"

"No," I tell him honestly.

"Do you think you'll stop loving me five years down the road?" he questions more sternly and I pause a moment. "If you say 'I don't know' to that question, then you must not love me as much as you say."

I don't like where this is going.

"But, that plan... what if I don't want to have kids or anything like that?"

"Why wouldn't you want to have kids with me?" he snaps hatefully and I'm surprised by the venom in his voice.

"Well... I don't know... I just... what if I change my mind? What if I want to become like a healer or something?"

"Do you want to be healer?"

"No... but..."

"Then why are we even talking about it? You want to be a writer, yes? And all a writer needs is a typewriter and time to write. I can give you that. I can give you all the free time in the world."

"To wait for you to come home, like some kept woman?" I ask and he narrows his eyes dangerously.

"Don't you want to be kept by me?" he asks in a flat and deadly voice.

I don't say anything.

"Besides," he adds harshly. "You wouldn't be a kept women because we're married. You would just be my wife, doing what a wife is supposed to do and I'll be doing my role as head of house. Why are you making this difficult?"

"What if you meet someone else?" I ask, nearly choking on the words. "Will this effect you or am I the only one held to this now or never stipulation?"

"You're pissing me off," he says with a clenched jaw and anger flames in my heart.

"It's a good question to ask," I nearly start yelling at him. "You're just as much mine as I'm yours. I deserve to know this stuff."

"I won't meet anyone else," he says seriously. "I don't want anyone else and unlike you, I'm not constantly confused about my feelings and the life that I want. Do you want anyone else?" he asks sharply and roll my eyes. "Don't make that face," he snaps. "That must be the only reason why you're hesitating on this very easy and obvious fucking question."

"I'm trying to be realistic," I defend myself and glares.

"No, you're not. You're being stupid."

That's all he says and it infuriates me when he talks down to me like I'm a child. "Don't call me names," I hiss at him.

"I was trying to be nice about this," he says hatefully.

"I know that's hard for you," I sneer and he stands up. "Can I date other people?" I ask hatefully. "Or will I still burn because of the marriage thing?"

"Why would you even ask me that fucking question?" he snaps and I stand as well.

"Well? Can I?"

"No," he says flatly.

"Then that defeats the purpose of this little talk, doesn't it?"

"If I can't have you, no one else can either."

"That's what crazy people say before they murder someone," I hiss and he narrows his eyes dangerously.

"I'm walking away from you before I call you more names," he says sarcastically before hopping off the bench and taking the stairs two at a time.

Before he can leave, I start to feel guilty. He has been so kind to me today and I know he tries hard to make things nice for me. It is out of Draco's character to give such a choice... maybe this was him trying to be sweet. It's kind of sweet in a way... if someone else said it without Draco's demanding disposition I suppose it would be romantic. Is it so wrong that my boyfriend would want to be with me like that? No, I guess not. With a sigh, I pick up the bracelet.

"Draco, wait," I say tiredly as I stand up to follow him. He stops to glare at me over his shoulder. "I'm sorry," I tell him honestly. "But this conversation is kind of odd..." and worrisome.

"It's not odd. You're just over thinking it. I shouldn't of even fucking brought it up. My attempts at being understanding have been misplaced and now I'm officially angry."

"It wasn't my intention to make you angry," I tell him seriously. "This is just... a loaded question for me. I'm not like you," I admit. "Thinking that far down the road scares me."

"Then let me do the thinking," he says and I bite my lip. He looks down at the jewelery in my hands. "You don't have to wear it," he says and then he looks into my eyes. "I won't make you. I could," he adds. "But I won't."

He touches my arm and steps closer to me when I don't say anything and he bends down, placing a kiss against my cheek.

"It's alright," he says as he takes the bracelet from me. "Think on it, yeah?"

He starts to put it in his pocket and I put my hand on his wrist. "Wait, I'll wear it," I whisper and he looks at me.

"I don't want you to do it just to please me," he says with a sigh and I shake my head, taking it away from him and putting it on my wrist.

"I know," I tell him seriously as I hold it together so he can clasp it for me. "I want to wear it."

He looks me over for a few moments before nodding his head. "Alright," he says as he fixes it together for me. He pauses for a moment before bringing my hand up to his mouth and kissing my knuckles.

I pull my hand away and lean in to kiss his lips.

"Tomorrow," he says as he lingers against my lips. "After the Quidditch game, I want you to get in a fight with me and smack me," he says. I snort and pull back.

"What?" I say once I realize he's totally serious.

"Umbridge and Snape will be watching... I need them to see you break up with me. I know we've been avoiding each other but, with the Dark Lord knowing we're intimate, I need it to be known that you hate me."

"I'm not going to smack you," I tell him.

"It's not like you haven't done it before," he says and I slump my shoulders.

"That was wrong. I shouldn't have hit you," I tell him, feeling all guilty again. It's not right for boys to hit girls, it shouldn't be right for girls to hit boys either.

"I need it to be dramatic," he explains. "So it will resonate in their mind the next time they're around the Dark Lord. I need him to see it. Besides," he says with a sexy little smirk. "I like when you hit me."

"Don't be perverted," I reply and he laughs.

"I think you like it," he says with a smirk, leaning in close, only to pull away at the last moment when I go to kiss him.

"Hey!" I scold and he laughs.

"We better get back inside. I bet the Dark Lord will be having his minions looking for you soon," he says and I nod my head, becoming serious again when I realize that it's true.

"Aren't you one of the minions?" I ask, trying to make a joke and he snorts.

"Yes, a very handsome minion," he says with a laugh and I smile at him as we leave the stands. "One who, luckily, likes you a great deal."

I smile at him again and we part ways when we reach the castle.

I'm dripping water all over the floor as I walk back towards my dorm with a silly smile on my face. I'm playing with the bracelet on my wrist when I hear a polite cough trying to get my attention and I stop walking all together when I place it.

"Hello, Miss Weasley," Umbridge smiles sweetly at me as she walks towards me. "My, what have you been doing? Outside, in this weather?" she tisks her tongue as she takes in my appearance, her eyes lingering on the blue sweatshirt I'm wearing that is obviously male and obviously not mine.

"Yeah," is all I say.

She's wearing a yellow dress that has yellow feathers across the collar and sleeves. She looks like some demented bird with the face of a toad.

"Where are you going?" she says and I motion towards the stairs.

"My dorm," I say softly. "I have... I have homework to do," I say because it seems like I should have something to do when I get there.

"Ah, yes," she says as she takes my arm. "Allow me to walk you."

"No, it's alright. I know where my dorm is," I say and she laughs at me.

She is being a little nicer than I ever remember her being.

"After Mr. Rookwood's unfortunate demise, the Dark Lord saw fit to place me as the new liaison to the Ministry of Education. You will be reporting to me from now on," she says in a sweet little voice that makes me sick.

"Okay," I say because I can't say anything else and she pats my arm.

"I think you'll find that I'm more attentive than Mr. Rookwood was," she says and I swallow hard. "Don't send a man to do a woman's job, I always say."

I smile politely even though I want to run screaming.

"Let us make the best of this year," she says, giving me a grin when we reach my dorm. She pats my arm after letting go of it. "After all, your success will reflect on all of us."

Oh, now I see why she's so nice.

"It will be a good year," she says and I nod my head as she turns to walk away.

"Bye," I whisper to her retreating back.

As she walks, she leaves a trail of feathers in her wake and I watch them fall along the castle floor before going to my common room where Daphne bombards me with a new cheer idea for the upcoming Quidditch game.

"You gave her all that money?" Daphne says in disbelief and I nod my head as I tie the trainers on my feet. "And now she won't even look at you?"

"I can't say I blame her really. She loved Theo... and it's my fault he was taken away."

"How was it your fault?" she asks as I hop on the little brick wall that runs along the lake and I balance myself on top of it as we walk towards the stadium. "Did you make the men take him?"

"Well, no," I tell her with a frown as I pull my cloak around me a little further to ward off the chill. "But I told Blaise, knowing full well something was going to happen."

"But you didn't know he would be sent for re-education," she points out and I shake my head. "Then I don't know why you're so bent out of shape about it. What Theodore was doing was disgusting and he made a lot of people mad. Draco would have saw it eventually, it was only a matter of time. You should tell Lovegood that."

"She won't talk to me, so it hardly matters," I admit. "She's all buddy buddy with Romilda Vane now." I feel my heart bristle as I remember seeing them together during practice and I sneer a little to myself. "I don't know what to do. I feel like I should go and beg for forgiveness but a part of me doesn't want to do that."

"Because of all the money you gave to release her father?"

"Yeah, I guess," I admit uncomfortably. "Does that make me a bad person?"

"No," Daphne says with a shoulder shrug. A gust of wind comes and she reaches into her blue pea coat to pull out a pair of white puffy ear muffs. "I think I would feel the same way," she says as she puts them on. "So, now you're like broke?" she says and I nod my head.

"I got my bank statement yesterday," I tell her, it's the only mail that I ever get. "I only have a couple gallons left." When I saw the total, I nearly cried, to be honest. I have been saving since I was twelve... it was hard to see it all gone in one swoop. "I guess that writing retreat is out of the question," I say bitterly.

It's not like I had a chance anyways in the Dark Lord's new world, but it was hard to let go of that dream.

"I'm sure you can still go if you wanted," she says with a laugh in her voice. "You know who to ask."

Draco, yeah. It always goes back to him. "Yeah," I trail off with a shrug as we reach the locker rooms.

"We should do something tonight," she says with a sigh. "Like have a girls night or something after the game. Things have been so drab around here."

"Will you invite Pansy?" I ask carefully and she gives me a curious look when we enter the room. All the other girls in the squad are already there and ready for the game. I take off my cloak, dressed in the cheer-leading uniform. I'm grateful that it's cold because we get to wear the black mock turtle necks underneath the revealing top. "I think she kind of hates me," I admit.

"She doesn't hate you," she says with a smile as she goes over to the mirror to check her make-up. "She likes you."

"I doubt that," I say as I send a look to Luna who is sharing a funny secret with Romilda Vane.

"She actually does. I think she's just kind of all turned around. She really likes Blaise, you know," she says and I nod my head. "And Blaise is such a jerk to her... She's kind of like Draco... she takes it out on everyone."

"She's obsessed with him," I say and Daphne nods her head.

"She's been obsessed with Zabini for years..."

"Not Zabini," I say quickly and she looks at me, her blue eyes twinkling. "Draco... she's obsessed with Draco."

She makes a face and shakes her head. "No, she's not."

"Why does she care so much about if he's happy or not? She was one of the main people who kept pushing me at him and, before the Halloween party, she was so mean to me... she called me selfish and that I needed to apologize to Draco and all this other stuff. What type of girlfriend would say that to me? Even if I was wrong for some reason... if she was my friend, then why is she more concerned with how Draco's doing than me?"

"Her and Draco go way back. They've been friends since... forever."

"That's fine," I tell her. "But she doesn't have to pretend to be my friend when all she is is a bridge for Draco."

"Let's not talk about it..." she says uncomfortably. "Let's talk about something else."

"How are you bonded to Draco?"

"Say what?" she asks, blinking her long lashes in my direction.

"Draco, I know you guys... all of you are bonded to him somehow... like I'm bonded to him. Can you explain that to me?"

"I..." she trails off and then we hear the music signaling the beginning of the game. Her eyes widen. "Ah!" she says as she hops up and grabs her pom poms. "Let's go everyone! We need to go!"

I frown and grab my own stupid pom poms, following behind everyone else as they jog up the stairs to our cheering station. We're playing some Swedish team today and I'm glad that it's a home game because I don't think I would have been up to traveling all the way to Sweden. Of course, I don't really know any of the cheers we're doing, so I end up just kind of giving up and sitting down on the one of the benches to watch the game with my arms crossed. I want to know how everyone else is bonded to Draco... and do they all want to follow him... or is there one who will ruin it for everyone?

I think that as Millicent passes by me on her broom. She drops the quaffel after a thin chaser from the opposite team cuts her off and they intercept it. I huff angrily at how bad she is and I cross my arms as I watch the rest of the game in impatient silence. To my surprise, Draco didn't catch the snitch. Their seeker, a rough looking bloke with black hair braided down his back caught it. I could tell that Draco wasn't happen about it and, judging by the angry sneer on his face, his team mates were going to get an ear full in the locker room. With the game being over, we all retreated to the great hall to eat dinner, but I was stopped by the Draco before I could go in to eat.

I could tell he was upset about losing the game, but before I could ask him anything about it, he cut me off with an absurd request.

"Hit me."

"I'm not going to hit you," I tell him sharply as he tugs on my arm and glares down at me after all the students, including the happy Swedish team, take their seats.

"Fucking hit me, Ginny. People are watching."

"I'm not hitting you," I say in a fierce whisper as the hall quiets down to look at us.

"Hit me, you cunt."

That words sends an angry pain down my spine and I narrow my eyes dangerously. "What did you just say?" I ask in a deadly whisper and he tilts his head up with that smug look on his face.

"You know what I said," he replies with a pleased little smile on his face. "You want to smack me now, don't you?" he adds like a know-it-all.

I roll my eyes and shake my head, crossing my arms so I don't actually do as he wants. "It's a stupid idea and calling me names isn't going to make me change my mind on that."

"Fine," he says bitterly and he takes a step closer to me and bends down closer to my face. "As your head of house, I order you to smack me."

Free will leaves me and I bring my hand up to callously smack it across his face. He looks very pleased with himself as the hall gasps at my actions and when the demand shakes off of me, I narrow my eyes dangerously. He said he wouldn't make me do anything against my will again and I find anger making my face hot.

To his utter surprise, I bring my hand up and smack him a second time by my own choice. That smug look left him rather quickly. "That's for calling me a cunt," I tell his surprised face before I walk off.

My hands are clenched in fists at my sides as I stomp down the halls. I can't believe that jerk. When I enter an empty corridor at the rear of the castle, I hear footsteps trailing behind me and when I glance over my shoulder, I see Draco's predatory approach. Why is he following me?

Of course, he grabs me before I can make it to my room and he pins me against the wall. "I think it's sexier with the uniform," he says against my ear before adding a bite.

It's weird that hitting turns him on so much and when I told him so he laughed and said he must be a masochist. I scoffed at the idea and when he pinched my bottom I inhaled a sharp breath, then he said I must be one too.

Then I remembered what he did and I pushed him back. "You said you wouldn't make me do anything with that stupid order head of house thing," I cry and he shakes his head.

"I said nothing of the sort," he adds with a little smile but I'm not willing to play with him right now.

"Draco, I honestly don't like it when you do that to me. I don't like not having control over myself."

"You're right. I'm sorry, but now there will be no doubt in anyone's mind that our attachment is through. At least for the time being, the Dark Lord can rest assured that there isn't a traitor among his inner circle."

"What if someone see's you mauling me?" I ask with a brow raised when he starts kissing my neck. "All that hitting was for not."

"I have half a mind to make you quit," he says, totally ignoring me as his hand runs along my midriff under the dark turtle neck. "Everyone stares at you when you wear this."

"I thought you liked my uniform," I fake pout as I bring my hand up to his arm, officially forgiving him because I love him.

"That was before, when everyone knew you were mine," he says seriously. "I could show you off," he adds. "Now you're free game. I don't like it..." he says, trailing off with a frown on his face.

It's actually kind of adorable to see him frown that way and I laugh as I kiss him. "I'm hardly that in demand," I tell him as I bring my arms up to his neck. "Stop pouting," I tell him with a pleased smile and he smirks, lifting me up. I squeal in surprise and grip his shoulders.

"Draco!" I say with a laugh as he lifts me up and I cover my mouth because that was really loud. "You're going to get us caught."

"I need to take you somewhere," he says as he kisses me again, a quick snap against my lips.

"We can't go to your room. We can't go to my room. We can't go anywhere," I tell him as I run my hand over his cheek. "You said everyone is always watching. I guess we just have to..."

"We could go to the green house," he says quickly as he looks down the hallway.

"What if Sprout is there?"

"I can knock her out," he says seriously and I snort in laughter at how needy he's being.

He really wants to get laid right now.

"You can't do that," I tell him softly because I know he totally would. "Wait..." I say when he cusses under his breath. "I know a place," I say as I think of the room of requirement.

"Where's that, copper top ?" he says, kissing my jaw and I snort again at the nickname.

"Come on," I tell him as I take his hand. "I can show you."

We sneak around like children playing hide and seek, hiding behind statues and running down halls as people pass us. When we get to the third floor, Draco smirks as he rubs his hand up the back of my skirt.

"I remember this," he says with a smug smile and I shake my head before going towards wall and walking three times in front of it.

A door appears and inside we find a rather posh looking living room with large fluffy white couches and yellow walls.

"This is cozy," he says before grabbing me around the waist and walking me back towards one of the couches. "Good thing too," he says as he pushes me down. He stands in front of me as he starts to unbuckle his belt slowly. "I'm not in a good mood. I can't believe that fucking git caught the snitch before I did. I have half a mind to think he cheated."

"You would think that," I tell him with a smile as I scoot to the end of the couch to help him unbutton his riding pants.

"I do," he says with a smug smile. "There is no way I would have lost during a fair match and it didn't help that I was completely distracted by you wearing this ridiculously short skirt. It was just a recipe for disaster and I can't be held accountable for it."

"I sat out for most of the game," I tell him with a smile and he nods his head as he bends down to kiss me. He fingers work their way behind my back and he has my top and turtle neck lying on the floor in two seconds flat.

"It doesn't matter," he says sharply and I smirk as he pushes me back until I'm laying on the couch.

I make room for him by spreading my legs and I let him crawl on top of me after he throws off his Quidditch jersey. God, he's so good looking and I readily pull him down to me for a passionate kiss. I was wearing a sports bra, so he couldn't easily unclasp it like he normally would and he cussed to himself in frustration when he realized I would have to sit up to take it off. I laughed at it, of course, and he gave me room to move as I threw the bra with my other clothes. It was nice and warm in the room and I was turned on so I was feeling the heat even more so than usual as I pulled him back down to me. I was more than ready to give in to him, until I remember something very alarming.

"Wait..." I tell him with a sigh, I push his hips back a bit and he narrows his eyes. "I haven't..." I trial of uncomfortably as I shift underneath him.

"What is it?" he snaps impatiently and I bite my lower lip.

"I haven't taken any of those potions," I tell him with my legs wrapped around his. "That birth control potion. You said I needed to take it every three months."

"It's okay," he says, bending down to kiss my neck. "I'll pull out."

"Draco," I push him back again. "I don't want to have a baby."

"Neither do I," he says seriously.

"Everyone keeps talking about that," I tell him worriedly, admitting another secret fear of mine. "There's a lot of foreshadowing that makes me uncomfortable."

He sighs and rests his elbow against the couch so he can support his head. "No one's foreshadowing anything. I have a plan, Gin, and teenage pregnancy isn't one of them. I can't go into politics with that stain on my reputation," he says and I frown as I look at him.

"But Blaise said..."

"How about you not worry about what Zabini says," he says flatly. After a few moments he brings his hand down and get to work on removing my skirt and knickers. "But he was right," he says seriously when he pulls them down my legs, leaving me totally naked to the soft lighting in the room. "The Dark Lord's claim is older than mine," he says as he glares down at me like it was my fault. "Only a child could break it. So either he has to die soon or..."

"Baby," I say flatly and he nods his head as I take out my hair tie, letting my hair fall back freely against the pillows.

"It would instantly break any tie he had to you," he says as he pulls down his own pants and boxers. I watch the movement, always fascinated with his body. "The contract he wanted you to sign would further cement that tie."

"What did it say?" I ask softly as he begins touching my body intimately to get it ready for him

"A lot of things," he says seriously, never once stopping his clever fingers. "It would act mostly as a gag order of some sort. You physically wouldn't be able to say anything negative about him or about your time spent alone with him. It would bar you from contact with certain fractions of society and it would sign over all rights you had, including parental, to him. You wouldn't be able to go to the loo without his permission. He would be able to do that," he says. "With that claim he has."

I bite my lower lip, my mind worried about what he just said and my body worried about how good his fingers feel. "Isn't there any other way?" I ask softly as I grab his shoulder and lift my hips.

"You know what I plan on doing..." he says and I can't help myself, I lean up and kiss his jaw just because I feel like kissing him when he touches me like that.

"But what if you don't? What if it takes longer for you to do that?"

"There's only one way to break that bond he has with you besides the baby thing, but there's no way of actually knowing it."

"What is it?" I ask in a whisper against his ear that makes his body shiver. I smirk at the movement and the smug way it makes me feel to have that effect on him.

"Which ever side did the spell first... whoever initiated it might be able to do a counter spell," he says. "It was so long ago and it's a very strong might... I would place money on the spell cast on the Slytherin side," he says, looking deeply into my eyes as he wets his lower lip. He's sexy and I can't help but think that besides the serious conversation we're having. "We're all sneaky bastards."

I smile a little.

"But like I said, hopefully there will be no worry for you on the matter," he says and I bite my lower lip again when a pleasurable hum ripples through my body. "My first course of action is always the best."

Right.

He kisses me again and then he removes his fingers and I pout at him as he smiles at my disappointment. "Stop being so impatient," he says as he kisses my collar bone. I know where his downward trail is leading him and I smile at the thought.

"Are you going to give me a suck job?" I ask with a smirk and he raises a brow as he kisses my stomach.

"What?" he asks with a laugh and I run my hands through his hair.

"Never mind, inside joke," I admit to him with a smile as I think of my ridiculous time in the Chamber with that perverted ghost.

"Who do you have an inside joke with?" he asks, his face losing some of it's humor as he wraps a hand around my waist.

"No one important," I say, still feeling playful and his face becomes a lot more serious than I would have liked.

"Tell me," he says as he sits up a little and I frown at the dark look on his face. "Saying inside jokes but not sharing them is very annoying," he says and I try to shake off how ridiculous he's being by leaning up and smiling as I touch his chest.

"Don't be silly," I tell him as I move forward to place a kiss against his neck.

He pulls away. "Why aren't you telling me?" he asks suspiciously and I give him a disbelieving look. "Is it a guy?" he asks and I give him a surprised look because of the conclusion that he just automatically jumped to. "Is it Dean Thomas?" he asks and I give him a nervous laugh.

"What are you talking about?" I ask as I try to pull him to me again. "It's not a guy. Don't be ridiculous. "

"Then fucking tell me," he snaps and I try to quench my anger at how he's speaking to me to reassure him of my feelings.

"It was that ghost," I tell him softly with a furrowed brow, all playfulness gone. "From the bathroom. Moaning Myrtle. She kept calling a blow job a suck job... I thought it was funny," I tell him with a frown as he studies my face, looking for the lie. "Why are being so serious?" I implore and he runs his hand through his hair before crawling back on top of me, pushing me against he cushions in the process.

"You should have said that from the beginning," he says flatly as he parts my legs and pushes into me.

I'm not half so turned on anymore and I turn my head to the side because I find myself not in the mood as he slides in and out of me. He just ruined the moment for me and I shut my eyes as he works on top of me, getting harder and faster with each thrust of his hips. This wasn't the loving sex I had been looking forward to just a moment ago and I tried not to think too much about it as his body slid in and out of my own, creating amazing friction.

After a while I, begrudgingly, started to get into it again and I wrapped my legs tightly around him as he drilled into me, leaving bites and kisses on my neck and shoulder. By my first orgasm he was officially forgiven for being such a demanding sort of person and I was kissing him full on by the time he was ready to finish.

"Pull out," I reminded him between kisses as I ran my fingers down his back. We were both sweating. He was holding out for a remarkable amount of time and I suspect my 'five minute' comment that I had teased him with had really made him want to refute that claim.

He mumbles something against my neck... something that sounds suspiciously like no, and I frown as he puts one of my legs in the crook of his elbow, pulling it up further.

I forgot for a moment, what I was saying in the first place, but when his movements became less controlled and more jerky, I realized what was about to happen.

"Remember to pull out, Drake," I tell him softly, shortening his already short name to endear him more.

I like to think he heard me. I like to think that he was going to do as I said despite not answering me, but when his body started to tense and he made three more long and deep movements against me... I knew he was done and he had not pulled out.

He collapses on top of me, breathing heavily into my ear as I pet down his hair. He stays there for a few moments before exhaling a slow breath and moving to my side, finally pulling out of me.

"You didn't pull out," I point out flatly as I put my fingers in between my legs. I wish I wouldn't have, actually. It was a mixture of mine and Draco's arousal that coated my fingers and I made a face as I wiped it on the couch.

"No," he said breathlessly. "I didn't."

"You have more birth control potion in your room, right?" I say, trying not to freak out about it. After all, not everyone gets pregnant that easily and I was sure it would be the case with this. "I can take it soon?"

"Yes," he says with his hand on his chest and then he sat up to clean himself up and put on his pants.

That was all he said, and I sat up, moving sweaty hair out of my face as I scooted towards him and kissed his shoulder.

"It would be nice to live in here for a while," I muse as I look around the room. He puts on his shoes. "This is a magnificent room, don't you think?"

"It is nice," he says. He looks around him and then he glances at me as I run my fingers lovingly through his hair.

He stares at me for a few serious moments before he smiles a little to himself and turns away.

"What was that?" I ask, matching his smile because it makes him look so handsome. "What was the smile for?"

"I just like you a lot," he says with a boyish smile as he ties his riding boots and I laugh a little as I reach for my clothes as well.

"I'm glad you like me," I tell him sarcastically, making fun of the word.

"Not many people have that honor," he tells me as I put on the sports bra and knickers.

"You only like me for my body," I joke and he smiles at me.

"And quite the body it is," he says suggestively as I put on the turtle neck. "I could do without that though," he says, eying the turtle neck with distaste. "Remember when we had that talk about your clothes?" he says and I look at him with humor. "Well, I fucking hate that."

"Well, unfortunately for you, it's part of the uniform and I have to wear it," I tell as I put on the skirt and zip it up.

"Another reason to make you quit," he says flatly and I laugh at him as I put on my shoes. "Perhaps you can keep the rest of the uniform for my private viewing pleasure," he says with a wink.

"Everyone would be so disappointed if I quit," I say with a fake pout as I push him back and straddle his waist once we're both dressed again. "I am the best on the squad, you know."

He laughs as he puts his hands on my waist. "The team would be losing a gem in your absence," he says with a pleasant smirk on his face as he leans in to kiss me. "How would the people know how the cheers are supposed to look if they don't have you to show them how they definitely are notsupposed to be?"

"That sounded suspiciously like an insult," I tell him as I purse my lips in thought.

"No need to be suspicious," he says with a smile. "It was," he adds and I bite his lower lip as punishment for his remark.

He laughs it off and after a long kiss he pulls back with a sigh. "We should venture out," he says as he looks into my eyes. "People will notice both of us are absent and I don't want to have all the smacking go to waste."

"For sure," I tell him rightly as I nod my head. I stand up and let him put his hand on my waist as we walk towards the door.

"By the way," he says when we get to the door. I look up at him curiously as he puts his hand on the knob. "You hit like a girl."

I pretend to look offended when he opens the door and he peeks his head out to see if the coast is clear. "I should go back to the Great Hall," he says. "If you want, I can have Pansy bring some food for you. I don't think it would be wise for you to go in with me."

"Okay," I say gently because I was hungry and that did sound like a good plan. "See you later."

"Bye," he whispers as he plants a quick kiss against my cheek. We go to part ways, but we both hear the footsteps before we see them. I send shocked looks to the person running right towards us.

To my relief it was Daphne, but she looks quite upset.

"Come quick," he says to Draco in breathless voice. "We need your help."

"Why?" he asks as he follows after her when she begins running down the hall. I look around me for a few moments before I decide to follow. "What happened?"

Daphne doesn't answer and we scurry all the way to Rookwood's old office where Millicent Bulstrode is standing guard in front of the door.

"What is this?" Draco snaps hatefully and when he opens the door to the office, I peek around him to see Dolores Umbridge bound to the office chair, gagged with magic.

Her eyes are on fire when she sees Draco in the doorway and she starts spitting hate from around her gag as she wiggles with her bonds. I cover my mouth in surprise and send a look to Daphne who is looking very bashful and upset.

"What happened?" Draco asks in a dark and chilly voice as we both walk into the room.

The door shuts behind us and I look at the other occupants. It seems that there was a girl's club meeting of some sort because Pansy, Daphne, Millicent, and Ivy were all in the room, looking very nervous as Draco eyes the hated professor.

"She was going to follow you after you left the hall," Pansy says flatly. "I'm sure to spy," she adds. "I knew what you were doing because you hadthat look in your eye," she adds, giving me a look, taking in my messy appearance. I knew what she meant.

She knew he was going to come to me and she knew he wanted sex.

That's fun to think about.

"If she would have caught you together after that display she would have gone right to the Dark Lord," she says and Umbridge grunts around the gag. "After your declarations at your Manor, I knew that he would be extremely suspicious if you were caught with her like that after what you had said."

What did he say?

"I followed her," Daphne says fearfully. "I tried to distract her, but she just kept pushing me aside. She went your dorm first," she says, looking at me. "She found a notebook," she says as Pansy hands it to Draco. "She read through it quickly... she was going to tell him all of your plans, Draco!" she says. "I didn't know what to do so I cursed her and I had them help me bind her after she woke up. Perhaps you can swipe her memory of the incident. Make it like it never happened."

Draco doesn't say anything for a while and I watch his face as he stares at Umbridge with such a cold look in his eyes that I became a bit chilly myself.

"A sharper mind can't hold onto a memory charm like that," he says and then I blush a little when I think of how easily he tampered with my mother's memory. I guess she's not as sharp as Umbridge. "She'll remember eventually," he says, his voice low and dangerous and dark.

It's actually concerning to hear the way he's speaking right now because it's in such stark contrast to how sweet he was just a few moments before.

"Then..." Daphne trails off uncomfortably as she looks at Draco. "Then what should we do?"

He's silent again. This is a side of him I have only glimpsed before and it didn't put me at ease.

After a life time of standing and staring, he finally speaks.

"She has to die," he says and I look at Umbridge.

Her eyes have gotten impossibly wide and I felt enough compassion to feel bad for her.

"Draco," I whisper to get his attention and when he looks at me, his eyes are dead and cold. "Are you sure a memory charm wouldn't work on her?" I say, almost pleadingly because, even though I didn't care for the woman bound to the chair... I didn't know if she deserved to die. "You're so good at those. I'm sure it would work and hold."

He pushes my notebook at me and levels me with a cold glare. "Burn the pages you wrote," he says flatly and I cradle the book to my chest. "You made it very easy for someone to find them and God knows what else you have to expose me."

"I..."

"Shut up," he snaps and I snap my mouth shut, a blush staining my cheeks because of the harsh way he's speaking to me in front of so many. "Go to your room now. Millicent will accompany you."

"Draco..." I trail off again and reach out to touch him to make him see reason.

He puts his hand up to stop me. "Don't touch me," he says and I retract my hand quickly. "Do as I say."

"Come on, Weasley," Millicent snaps at me as she takes my arm.

"What are we going to do?" I hear Daphne say as I head towards the door.

"We're not doing anything," I hear Draco's voice dripping with hatred. "This is your folly. You are going to do it," I hear him sneer and I look over my shoulder once to see Daphne's ashen face staring at the man I had just made love to.

Millicent holds onto my arm the whole way to the common room of our dorm and she pulls me towards the fireplace that's alive and heating the room.

"Well," she says after a few moments. "You heard what he said. Burn the pages."

"Surely he doesn't actually mean to kill her," I say outloud. I mean, I knew what kind of person he was and I knew what he had been doing, but to actually see it like that... the decision he made like he controlled who lived and who died so readily was weighing heavily on my heart.

Millicent sighs loudly like I was stupid and then she grabs the notebook from me and opens the first page. I cringe as she rips it out and throws it into the fire.

"You're so stupid," she says as she tears out a second page. "What do you think he is? Some knightly gentleman?" She throws more pages into the fire as I stare at her with glassy eyes. "Don't act like you don't know his intentions. He would kill all of England to get what he wanted and you know all that very well so don't pretend to be shocked."

"What is it he wants exactly?" I ask with a cry in my voice and she looks at me as she throws the last remaining pages of my notes into the fire.

"He wants," she starts with narrowed eyes. "For the world to be perfect as he thinks it should be."

I don't say anything to that. I just feel very troubled as she shoves the notebook at my chest and marches me up to my room.

She leaves me there by myself and I crawl into my bed with a headache pressing against my mind. I can't really do anything right now. I feel bad that I can't move to help someone in such dire situations... but who would I tell? Every authority figure would go straight to the Dark Lord with the information and then Draco would be found out. He would be killed. Umbridge is an unpleasant woman and God knows what she's been doing as a Death Eater. Does that justify my inaction? Should I go back downstairs and beg Draco to change his mind? I don't know... so I just stay where I'm at. I stare at the wall as the other room mates come into the room, grumbling about losing the Quidditch match and totally unaware of what murder could possibly happening right at this moment.

I stay in that spot for hours.

In the middle of the night, close to three in the morning, I jump when I feel a hand on my shoulder. "It's just me," I hear Daphne say in the darkness and I furrow my brows as she climbs into bed beside me, pulling the curtains around my bed to protect us from the others in the room.

"What are you doing?" I ask softly as she slides under my covers. It sounds like she's crying and I turn my body so I can face her. "Are you alright?"

"I'm sorry," she says with a voice thick with tears. I've never heard her cry before and it kind of threw me off guard. "I shouldn't have let Umbridge enter your room and go through your things. Now Draco is so very mad."

"It's okay," I tell her as I put my hand on her shoulder. "It wasn't your fault. Pansy said she intended to follow us after we left the hall. That is no ones fault but mine and Draco's."

She cries for a few more moments, making loud whining noises and turning her face into my pillow.

I rub her shoulder in an attempt to comfort her. "Did you..." I trail off softly as I think of Umbridge and the thing that Draco had said in her office. "Did you do that to her?" was all I could get out and she shushed me quickly.

"Let's never ever talk about it," she says with a cry as she puts her hand over my mouth. I peel her fingers back. "We must never ever talk about it. It never happened."

I don't say anything to that, but I honor her request and I don't bring it up again.

After a few minutes her sobs die down and she moans into the pillow once more. "Draco is going to be so mad at me for a while. He holds grudges like no one else," she says with misery evident in her voice. "And he's so very mean when he's angry."

"He has no right to blame you," I tell her seriously. "You had no way of knowing what she would find in my room and it's not your job to stop her. You only did what you thought was best... He's lucky, actually, that you chose to follow her. It's actually me he should be mad at... I was the one who just left my things out unguarded."

"Could you tell him that," she whispers hopefully. "Tell him that it wasn't my fault. That I didn't know what else to do. Convince him not to hate me. He's so cruel when he's upset."

"I'll talk to him," I tell her. "But I'm sure after he cools down he'll realize it himself."

She doesn't say anything to that, she just gives me a side hug. "I knew you would be good for him," she says against my hair. "I'm so glad we're friends," she says softly.

She doesn't say anything after that and neither do I. After a while, I think she actually falls asleep and I turn my back on her, trying to find my own space at the edge of the bed so she'll stop cuddling me.

Draco has a plan for everything, even he admitted that. I think I just saw what happens when things don't go according to his well thought out plans and I shiver to think of what he would do if the stakes were raised.

Politics seems like the worst thing for a man like Draco to go into.

Do you want to be mine always.... now that seemed like a life sentence instead of a romantic declaration of love.

I try not to think about it.

Sometimes I wish someone would clear my mind of the memories I hold. I can't seem to escape them... the Dark Lord was right when he mentioned the prison of the mind. It is the worst kind of hell.

I am sure of it now.
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Envy and Manipulations