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Marathon	By : Lomonaaeren Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Harry/Draco Views: 52456 -:- Recommendations : 2 -:- Currently Reading : 5
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. I am making no money from this fanfic.

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Chapter Fifteen—An Interview
            It took a long time for Harry to recover.
            Longer than it should have, he knew, his eyes closed as he mopped at the flush on his cheeks. There might have been some tears there, too, but he was going to keep any notion of those far away from his mind. Malfoy might be able to use Legilimency and learn that Harry thought he had wept.
            Harry wouldn’t have thought that Malfoy would use Legilimency against him, an hour ago. But that had been before he’d said…what he said.
            Harry swallowed and pushed himself slowly off the wall with one arm. His head was whirling. He knew that he had ignored Lily’s misbehavior for a long time, but on the other hand, it seemed like no one else was punishing her, either. Maybe he was too sensitive. If Ginny and the other Weasleys saw nothing wrong with what Lily was saying, why shouldn’t he let it go?
            Only what she’d quoted Ginny as saying had pushed him to act. Harry thought that was excusable.
            But now he had to worry about more things being wrong than ever, if he’d hurt people and disgusted them and was in danger of making them drift away from him, but not for the reasons he’d thought.
            Harry laughed through a throat that still felt suspiciously full of tears. Malfoy might have intended to give him a clearer picture of himself, but in reality, he’d given Harry more things to worry about. Harry wondered if he should go and tell him that. He thought Malfoy was in the kitchen and not his bedroom.
            But the moment the thought came to him, Harry had to shake his head. No, he wouldn’t give Malfoy the chance to laugh at him, or kick him again. He had to get some independent confirmation of what Malfoy had said, instead. Something that would tell him how close to the truth Malfoy had actually come.
            So he turned around, and tossed some Floo powder into his fireplace, and spoke the name of the one place he felt reasonably sure he would find someone home at this time of day. “The Burrow.”
            Then he had to pause to pick the powder up from the carpet, and remove the wards and charms that Malfoy had put on the fireplace. It was a good thing that Malfoy hadn’t said people were willing to forsake him because he was clumsy and forgetful, or that might well have served him as independent confirmation.
*
            “What can I do for you, Harry?”
            Harry lowered the steaming cup of tea to the table in front of him and sighed. Molly had welcomed him and fussed over him and seated him in the kitchen with enough tea and biscuits to feed an army, but it seemed she had known he’d come over for more reasons than just to visit. She sat opposite him now, her hands still. Harry couldn’t recall ever seeing her that way when he was in school.
            Well, it was true that she’d had four or five children still at home for most of that time, and while she could be busy enough when her grandchildren were at the house, there was no reason for her to be when they weren’t. And more by luck than anything else, Harry had chosen a time when there were no grandchildren here. Not even Arthur was in the house; he was puttering with “something Muggle” back in the garden, Molly had said.
            Harry subdued the impulse to pick up the tea again, recognizing that he was trying to run away from this conversation with Molly the same way that he’d run away so fast from all the ones with Malfoy. “Molly,” he said. “Do you think that I need to do something about Lily?”
            Molly stared at him. Harry winced. So Malfoy had been wrong after all, and Harry now sounded like a child abuser.
            “Why, what’s she done?” Molly asked, and sipped from her own tea. “I know that she made quite a display at her birthday party, but I thought that was down to the divorce. I expect that she’ll get over that eventually.”
            Harry grimaced and looked at his hands. He hadn’t thought this out, as usual. If he told Molly the truth, then he was dragging her into the divorce, and forcing her to choose sides. He and Ginny had both tried to keep from doing that, so far.
            But there were some things he could tell her that were true.
            “She keeps swearing at me,” he said. “She told me that she wanted me and Ginny to get back together, and when I said that I didn’t think that would be happening, she yelled at me. Slammed into her room and refused to come out the rest of the evening.” He swallowed again. “This morning, when I woke up and came out of my room, she said I looked like I’d had a shag.”
            Molly’s mouth fell open. Then she shook her head and said, “I can’t remember any of our children talking that way.”
            Harry kept a cautious eye on her as he sipped his tea and nibbled a biscuit again. “So it’s down to our parenting?” he asked. “Do you have any advice?”
            “They never talked like that, because I would have given them chores for a month,” Molly said firmly. “Ginny told me that there were problems with Lily, occasionally, but she’s never mentioned anything like that. How long has this been going on? Since the divorce, or earlier?” She had a determined set to her mouth.
            “Maybe she doesn’t talk like that in front of Ginny,” Harry mumbled. It figured, he thought, it just figured, that he would turn out to be a miserable excuse for a parent, and Ginny the one who could handle Lily. “But she only talks like that since the divorce. She was throwing tantrums like that before it, though.”
            Molly shook her head. “I really don’t understand,” she said softly. “I never saw her being spoiled. She was never spoiled here.” Then she seemed to draw herself up, and looked at Harry keenly. “But you must see that it’s unacceptable for her to act like that. Why, she goes to Hogwarts in a year! She won’t last a day if she speaks to her professors the way she speaks to you.”
            Harry winced again and decided that he might as well lay out the problem clearly and bluntly. Maybe Molly could help him better that way. “I think—I think that it’s only me. That I’m doing something that’s wrong. Maybe she would be fine with her professors. She seems fine with her mum. Can you give me any advice?”
            “Yes,” Molly said unexpectedly. Harry tried to sit up and pay attention. “Stop flinching.”
            “What?” Harry’s mouth fell open.
            “Stop acting as though you’re going to do something wrong with every step you take.” Molly put down her cup again and pointed at him. “Arthur was like that when Bill was two and Charlie was born, you know. Walking on eggshells because he was afraid that Bill was upset about the new baby and jealous, and that he would do something that made him more upset. And afraid that he would hurt Charlie. Charlie was a more delicate baby than Bill,” Molly added, her eyes distant and gentle. “Arthur was sure that every time Charlie cried when he held him, it meant Charlie was upset with him. Not that he was hungry, or needed a new nappy, or was tired, or just was crying to cry, the way babies do sometimes.”
            “But everything I do with Lily does seem wrong,” Harry had to argue. Didn’t Molly understand that? Why would Harry have come to her, otherwise? “I get her the wrong presents, and I don’t listen to her, and I don’t focus on her enough even when I’m with her, and I don’t inspire respect in her.”
            Molly clucked her tongue. “I won’t deny that you’ve done some things wrong, Harry. I just told you that, didn’t I? But Lily’s not a newborn anymore, either. A ten-year-old isn’t an adult, but she’s capable of learning some things and taking some responsibility for her actions. You do need to discipline her when she speaks to you as if she were your equal, or you’ll never get anything but that disrespect from her.”
            “I don’t know how.”
            “To stop flinching would be a good start,” Molly said. “And the next time she says something like that, tell her to go to her room. Isn’t that one way Ginny usually punishes her? I know that she’s told me that. Or take away something that she likes. Ginny used to take away flying privileges for a day.”
            “That would be—that would make her hate me more,” Harry said.
            Molly looked him in the eye. “You’re too concerned that she hates you and it’s never going to change,” she said softly. “You know that children can grow up and think differently about their parents, Harry. I know Ron used to resent us a lot and feel lost among his brothers.” She smiled a little. “He told me once that we had him sixth because we wanted to make his life miserable.”
            “He did?”
            “He was thirteen,” Molly said. “Unreasonable is pretty much the definition of thirteen.” She leaned across the table. “But now look at him. He’s the one who’s closest to us, and the one who sees us the most, what with Charlie in Romania and George and Percy so busy and Bill and his family gone half the year to Egypt. You’re having a difficult time with Lily. I know that. It doesn’t mean that she’s going to freeze into someone who hates you for the rest of her life.”
            Harry stared into his teacup. He supposed he had been thinking that, without meaning to. That every mistake he made would be permanent, and drive Lily away from him. That he would scar her irreparably with one careless word, and that meant it might be better not to utter any words to her at all.
            I thought I would abuse her.
            Harry shut his eyes. It seemed that this was a day of shattering revelations. He could have done without the one that he was afraid he was going to turn into Uncle Vernon someday, though.
            “Harry?” Molly’s hand was on her wrist, her concerned voice next to his ear. “You just went all pale. Do you need to see Audrey?”
            Harry forced his eyes open and took a deep breath. Audrey was Percy’s wife, a Healer, and although she was the least intrusive Healer Harry had ever met, that wasn’t saying much. “No, Molly, I’m fine,” he said, and smiled at her. “Maybe fine for the first time in a long time.”
            Molly eyed him. “You might have some idea of how to get along with Lily?”
            “And to discipline her,” Harry said. “I think—I think I was always afraid that I wouldn’t know how to do it because I was raised by people who were awful, you know? And I thought I would have to be awful. So I went too far the other way.”
            Molly narrowed her eyes. “I’ve thought that for a long time,” she said slowly. “Those awful Muggles…But I didn’t think you would ever think that, and I didn’t want to say it. I know you don’t like to talk about them. It’s more than just our conversation, isn’t it? Something’s happening to change your mind. Someone woke you up.” She looked far more interested than Harry would have thought she would. After all, her most likely assumption was that Harry had met someone to replace Ginny, and she could hardly approve of that. “Who was it?”
            Harry swallowed. They would find out eventually, and he would prefer that they found out from him rather than from Lily. “Draco Malfoy. I saved his son’s life, and he’s trying to stay with me and give me my life back in return.”
            Molly blinked a few times. Then she sighed and said, “I want you to listen very carefully to what I’m going to say to you, Harry, and not react immediately.”
            Harry clasped his hands in front of him. Had she seen Lily in the last few days? Had Lily told her that she thought Harry was gay? Or Ginny might have mentioned it, Harry supposed. Perhaps she was going to say something about the feud between the Malfoys and the Weasleys?
            “I wonder how good he is for you.”
            Well, that wasn’t what he’d suspected, unless Molly was going to use that to get around to talking about the Malfoy-Weasley feud indirectly. Harry eyed her. “What do you mean?” he finally asked, because Molly was frowning, but she hadn’t said anything else.
            “I wonder if he can teach you how to discipline Lily, and get along with you.” Molly spoke softly and slowly, considering each word before she said it, which Harry knew she didn’t always do. This must have been important to her. Part of him relaxed as he realized that he was still enough in Molly’s good graces for that, then, that she liked him enough to interest herself in what happened to him. “I wouldn’t think that he raises his children the way you strive to raise yours.”
            Harry relaxed enough to snort a little. “Molly, he was the one who made me come here. I mean, not that he told me to, but that he was the one who inspired it. He told me that Lily was probably being hurt by the way I treated her and other people, instead of helped. It might even happen with more than her, he said. Maybe I was hurting my other children, too, and Ron and Hermione, and the rest of you. I think he’s doing okay so far.”
            Molly’s eyebrows crept up until they merged into her hair. “He might be a good influence on you, after all,” she said. “But I have to question—Harry, I’m sorry, but I have to question what his interest is here. Why does he think repairing your life, rearranging your life, is good payment for his life-debt?”
            Harry rolled his eyes. “He thinks that my life is so messy that I can’t live. He promised to fix it. Maybe he’s not always doing the best job. He—he hit me where it hurt today. But he’s also fought with me, and he saved my life from a trap by some of my enemies. I saved his at the same time, so that didn’t cancel the life-debt, unfortunately. But he’s tried to make sure that I eat and sleep.”
            Molly shut her mouth with a snap on whatever she had been about to say, but her eyes danced, and a second later she shook her head and murmured, “It sounds like you have a new mother-in-law.”
            “I’m in no big hurry to get married again, believe me,” Harry said.
            He wondered a second later if he should have said that so quickly and eagerly, especially given the way Molly looked at him. Maybe she believed he was gay, too, and was just waiting for the time when he announced he was getting married to a man to say it. But Harry ducked his head and played with his teacup, and Molly chose to go on.
            “If he’s this good to you, then I have to admit, I don’t mind,” she said firmly. “I’d been pondering how to say that to you for a long time, and I feel like I can breathe to finally have it out in the open.” She leaned forwards and studied Harry cautiously. “I hope that you feel that way, too.”
            Harry smiled and patted her hand. “Yes. I would have—I would have reacted worse to it yesterday. Or just thought it meant I was an awful father and it was more confirmation that no matter what I did to try and change my relationship with Lily, I was doomed to mess it up.”
            “I don’t think you’re inherently an awful father,” Molly said. “You’ve done some bad things, yes, but I already told you that I don’t think they need to go on. But changing can be very hard.” She looked at the center of the kitchen, her face soft. Harry wondered what she was thinking about, but reckoned it could be just about any of her children. Like she had said about Ron, all of their relationships had changed to her over the years.
            “I’ll do my best.” Harry stood up to go, and paused to lean down and kiss her forehead. “Thanks, Molly. For being so good about…everything.”
            “You and Ginny are divorced, Harry, but that doesn’t make you the enemy.” Molly clasped his hands tightly. “Please never think that. You still have a family here if you want it, no matter if we disagree with you.”
            Harry hugged her and stepped back to the Floo connection. He felt as though he was surrounded by a hovering warmth, he thought, as though he’d cast a charm before he left home.
            He hadn’t realized how lonely he was. He’d been convinced that the Weasleys, minus Ron, were on Ginny’s side, and the awkwardness around them and the reserved smiles they gave him at things like Lily’s birthday party had just convinced him of that further. He ought to have remembered that they had other things to criticize that had nothing to do with the divorce. If Molly had wanted to talk to him about Lily but hadn’t felt able to, that would explain some of the constrained behavior, too.
            And now that he had had someone tell him, in less blunt and more loving terms, that he had done some things wrong but still had the potential to change…
            He had a Malfoy to talk to.
*
            delia cerrano: That will have to be next chapter.
            BAFan: Well, Draco would have believed it of himself. Maybe no one else, though. ;)
            Anon: Molly has given him a few sensible suggestions.
            SP777: Harry was too shocked to do so.
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Marathon