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Returning to Sanity	By : AchillesTheGeek Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Harry/Draco Views: 31212 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 3
Disclaimer: I do not own the Harry Potter books or films, nor the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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15. Returning the trust
Wednesday, May 13 1998
Harry dreamed …

"Draco Malfoy, this court finds you guilty of the death of Albus Dumbledore and sentences you to the Dementor's Kiss …"
"NO!" He screamed, but the words came out muffled and indistinct. "NO! It wasn't Draco! It was Snape, following Dumbledore's orders! NO! YOU CAN'T! NOOOOO!"

"Harry … Harry …. HARRY! WAKE UP!"
Harry woke up feeling very panicked, which faded as he found Draco's arms encircling him.
"What happened?" Harry asked, somewhat out of breath from fear, as he cast Lumos wordlessly without even thinking and his wand-tip came alight.
"You were yelling in your sleep. Nightmare?"
Then he remembered. "I dreamt … Oh Draco, I dreamt they'd sentenced you to be Kissed!"
"Hush," Draco said soothingly, rubbing Harry's back. "They didn't, remember? I'm here, I'm not going anywhere, I promise."
"Will you stay with me now?" Harry asked in a small voice.
"Of course," Draco replied, letting go for a moment so he could lift the covers and snuggle in with his friend. Harry whimpered slightly at the loss of contact, but quietened when Draco put his arms around him again, and clasped him tight, his left hand coming over to gently stroke the raven tresses of the frightened man. Harry slowly relaxed into the embrace, and it wasn't long before they were both fast asleep.

Harry came back to consciousness slowly. He felt lovely and warm and comforted, and lay in bed for a moment, his eyes still closed as he moved to stretch a little. He ran over the events of the previous night in his mind.
After the trial, they had dined at the Manor, which had been very pleasant. Narcissa had been a charming hostess, and seemed very happy at how comfortable the two young men were with each other. They had discussed all sorts of topics, but Narcissa had managed to avoid any real contention. She had praised Hermione for her intellect, which Harry found very strange; but as Draco pointed out, they didn't have to be friends with people to admire their skill, and Hermione was a better student than most Ravenclaws, never mind Gryffindors!
They had talked until very late, and Narcissa had suggested that he stay the night. Draco objected that the guest rooms still bore signs of their recent occupants; Harry didn't want to think about that. But Narcissa had things in hand: she replied that a bed could easily be set up in Draco's study, which had of course never been slept in by anyone. Harry had accepted gratefully. He hadn't drunk much, but more than he was used to (that being none), and probably too much to Apparate safely, and he really didn't feel like risking the Floo network either. He wasn't fond of it when stone-cold sober, he could imagine the effect that it might have on him when tipsy, and staying where he was definitely seemed the better option.
He remembered the good-night kiss Draco had given him; he was growing addicted to his kisses, so gentle and loving, full of hope and promise for more to come.
He remembered the happy feeling of lying in bed with his almost-lover in the room next door. He'd listened to Draco's even breathing as he fell asleep; it kept him smiling long after he was fast asleep himself.
He remembered the incident in the middle of the night, the feeling of arms encircling him, comforting words, and Draco promising to stay. Remembered with a little feeling of shame at having a nightmare and a large feeling of delight for the comfort he had received.
But now he worried: what did Draco think? They had actually slept in the same bed; that had to change things, right? Were they ready for that?
He opened one sleepy brilliant-green eye. Draco was sitting up in the bed, looking down at him, a smile on his face and concern etched in his grey eyes.
"Good morning," he said, stroking Harry's hair. "Are you feeling better?"
"Much," said Harry, and sat up himself, tentatively pulling Draco towards him.
But he found there was no reason for fear. Draco gripped him as before and soon they were cuddling happily. Draco was rather hoping that their "good morning" kiss might become something else when there was a knock on the door and the moment was lost.
"Excuse me, young masters," Dippy the house-elf sang out, "but Mistress Narcissa is asking you to be getting up now."
"All right, Dippy, all right," Draco moaned.
A quick Tempus charm showed it was only quarter to seven and Harry wondered why they had to get up so early. He found out fairly soon: his own shower and change took him a quarter of an hour, but Draco then took nearly a whole hour to get ready. When he had finished, every hair in place, clothing immaculate, he came and looked Harry over critically. He had lent Harry some of his clothes; happily they were more or less of a size, though Draco had an inch or two on him; but some of his older clothes fit rather well, Harry thought.
Draco didn't agree. He spent nearly ten minutes fussing about every wrinkle, getting everything to sit just right, even rebuttoning the shirt to make everything sit perfectly. Harry found this rather endearing: he normally didn't care and just pulled clothes on, but he accepted that it was important to look good for the trials.
Draco showed him the result in a mirror, and Harry had to admit that it was a vast improvement on how he was usually turned out. At least, he admitted it to himself; he wasn't about to hand Draco ammunition like that! But he smiled at his almost-lover. And that title made him think that perhaps it was time they discussed what was going on between them.
"Draco," he asked, "how would you describe our, er, relationship?"
"Hmmm. Good question." the blond replied, thoughtfully. "Um, I guess we're more than just friends, right? I mean, you seemed to be really happy with me in your bed, yeah? You were, right?"
Now here was something rather wonderful – Draco Malfoy being all tentative! Harry felt rather delighted by this; it meant that the Malfoy Mask really was down; the walls Draco had built to keep people out were crumbling before him.
"Yeah," he said, with a brilliant smile, then on impulse captured Draco's lips into a kiss. "More than friends. But less than lovers. For the moment. I think of you as my almost-lover."
Draco chuckled. "Almost-lovers. I'm good with that," he replied. "For the moment." Though maybe we could change it soon, he thought. It was a huge thing to him that Harry had trusted him enough to welcome him to his bed. He wanted to return that trust with love as interest.
At which point Dippy reappeared, sent by Narcissa to make sure they actually got to breakfast.

Draco was given leave to attend his father's trial, and of course Narcissa did not need leave, being free to go where she chose; so the three of them arrived together at Courtroom Ten at quarter to nine, just as the Wizengamot began to file in. After consultation with the Aurors about the business of the day, Narcissa explained to Harry that Lucius's trial would be rather different to Draco's or hers; he had been a Death Eater for such a long time, after all. The entirety of the first day was going to be taken up discussing events that Harry knew very little of, so she urged him to go away and have some fun somewhere else. He was unhappy about this; but Draco pointed out that they both really wanted to be together in private, so sitting together bored in public was going to be torture, and they owed him too much to put him through it.
Eventually, Harry capitulated, and asked leave to leave the courtroom. Elphias Doge smiled at him.
"Of course, Mr. Potter. You are a free wizard and welcome to come and go as you choose; we are indebted to you for your invaluable assistance yesterday, and I hope to see you tomorrow?"
"Yes, sir," Harry answered.
"I understand the Minister is still concerned that Mr. Potter to be guarded at all times?"
"Quite so, sir," Kingsley answered, gravely. With Yaxley at large, it was even more important than before.
"Auror Banks, would you be kind enough to accompany Mr. Potter?"
Robin agreed, formally, and they left the Courtroom together as the 'Expositor Falsitas' potion was distributed. Harry grinned to himself, pleased that they were continuing with that idea. He wondered how the politicians on the Wizengamot felt about telling only the truth for twelve hours; but they probably just went into hiding. After all, the potion didn't force them to tell the truth; it just stopped them from lying. So they probably just said nothing. He wondered idly if they could make it compulsory for Ministry officials to take it every day; but he decided that that would be just as bad as all the old Ministry ways. People had to be free, and that included being free to tell lies, he supposed. But not during court cases.
Inside the courtroom Robin had given no hint that he and Harry were friends, but as soon as they left the room he gave Harry and huge hug and said that he was thinking too much for a man who'd been told to have fun.
"Right," he said, "where shall we go today?"
Now, of course, Harry had to decide what to do next. It's all very well for the Malfoys to tell me to have fun, he thought, but how am I going to do that?
But the answer was rather obvious once he had asked himself the question, and he found his feet leading them to Diagon Alley and Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes to see how the twins were doing.
"Harry!" George yelled as soon as he saw him. "Hermioninny has been so worried about you! / You didn't come home last night apparently! / OOOOOHHH! Naughty boy!" they finished together, the whole speech being done in an astonishingly good imitation of a cross between Molly and Hermione at their most motherly.
Harry dissolved into laughter. "I had a lovely dinner at the Malfoys', and it got rather late, so they invited me to stay the night," he replied, when he got his voice back.
"'S all right," Fred said, with a wink, "we know you're a big boy now."
George continued, "Did you and Draco have fun?"
It would be George who asked that, Harry thought to himself, his face rather betraying how much fun he had had by turning rather red. Not, George thought to himself, as red as Neville had turned, but endearing nonetheless.
All he said was, "yes." And then, "um, do you think I could hang around with you guys today? I feel a bit down about things, and Draco is a bit busy with his father's trial…."
"Of course!" the twins yelled together at once. "A play day!"
And it was. They talked Harry through their latest ideas. They had just finished an Anti-Vanity Potion that you painted on mirrors; to begin with, it did nothing visible, but if you kept staring at yourself it would make your reflection look green and pimples would appear, growing bigger the longer you stood there. It was a typical, silly Weasley prank and Harry loved it.
Neville appeared and took Harry and George out to the greenhouse he had built at the back to show off a simple trick he had designed with some plants. They had large bell-like flowers which he had grown with a clever spell; as Harry watched, the flowers changed colour through the shades of the rainbow.
"Not a prank," Neville said apologetically, "but just something pretty and fun. You can get exactly the colour changes you want, and I'm working on a version which will even let you change them from time to time."
"You're too modest, Neville," George said, earning a shy smile from his boyfriend. "We love them, and so do our customers – we have hundreds of orders for them and Neville can't keep up with the demand! In fact, we're introducing colours into a lot of our range; it seems to be the in thing for the moment!"
Harry, impressed, explained that the Muggles had a similar sort of thing, done using electricity, which they called "fairy-lights". The fairies would not be amused, Neville decided.
Harry was wondering where the new confident Neville had gone; but as they started back for the shop, Neville winked at him and he suddenly realized what was going on. Neville had deliberately understated the case, just to let George praise him. He fell back to chat with him.
"Bit manipulative there, Nev; are you thinking of changing to Slytherin?" he asked, quietly.
"No," Neville said with a grin, "but George loves to praise my work, so why not give him the chance?"
"It's OK, I get it," Harry reassured him. It showed him something important: if he was going to be in a relationship with Draco, he would have to be prepared to give thought to how Draco worked and make sure he had space to do things his way. It was going to take a bit of work, Harry was sure, because they could both be rather – well, the polite word was headstrong, but the more honest one would be pig-headed …
As they entered the shop, they found things had started to get busy: apparently word had got around that Harry was there, and people were coming in for the chance to see him as well as for the twins' prank items. Harry still wasn't used to being a celebrity, and probably never would be; he was sure he'd never enjoy it. But for the moment, it was quite useful, as the people who came to see him all seemed quite happy to buy a few extra items that he recommended, and so once more when he was handed a cup of tea at eleven o'clock, he was told that about half the takings were because he was there. He disputed it this time; but Fred ran him through the figures and showed him that yes, based on their sales from the last few days, they had sold about twice as much as they had by eleven o'clock on the previous days.
Like Draco had been on Saturday, Harry was very impressed with how on top of business the two were. It was easy to dismiss them as pranksters and playful jokers; but in fact they made very good and trustworthy businessmen, with a keen eye for what would sell, and obviously a finger kept firmly on the pulse to make sure sales kept up. Harry was delighted to learn that his thousand galleon investment was taken so seriously and looked after so well – though really he had trusted the twins rather than the shop, and they had returned that trust in love a hundred times over, as far as Harry was concerned.
"Getting a bit serious there, little bro," Fred said, breaking in on his thoughts.
"How about some revelry instead of reverie?" George said, and, leaving Neville in charge of the shop, they went outside and proceeded to show off some of their products.
The Bouncing Balloon-Chairs had been refined a bit; the twins took one each, and threw them at him. When they hit, they surrounded him and he found himself tumbling around inside a ball that wouldn't ever let him stay upright. It managed to be infuriating and exhilarating at the same time, and Harry struggled to express himself, coming out with peals of laughter and shouts of frustration all at the same time.
The noise couldn't fail to attract more people who came to see what it was all about and stayed to watch the fun, and of course buy some for themselves; and by lunch-time Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes had already done well: in half a day they had sold more than in a normal day's trading.
At lunchtime the twins suggested they go to the Burrow; they were sure that Molly would be delighted to have them all. Neville said he'd mind the shop and shooed the rest of them away, including Robin. Of course they were right: Molly bustled over very excited as soon as they came through the Floo, and wrapped Harry in a hug and told him she'd heard he hadn't gone home and she had missed him at breakfast-time; he apologized but the twins cut in straight away:
"Leave him alone mum, he's a big boy now; / and he spent the night at his –"
"The Malfoy's house," Harry cut in. He really did not want Molly to know how the twins would describe his relationship; he wasn't sure he wanted to know himself yet.
"Never mind, you're here now, that's the main thing." Spotting the Auror, Molly continued, "and Robin too! GINNY!"
"Coming mum!" her daughter shouted from her room, and she thundered downstairs to them. As soon as she saw Robin, her face lit up, and she crashed into him with a huge hug, which Harry noticed was fully reciprocated. He hoped that he and Draco could learn to be so openly excited about one another. That would probably be a challenge for his almost-lover, he decided; so Harry's challenge would be to get him to do it. Challenge accepted, he decided, grinning to himself. But it was noticed.
"Little bro-o-ther," Fred trilled, coming to stand close to his right side and dropping his voice, "that's an evil grin. What's going on in that head of yours?"
"Oh, nothing," Harry said, rather too quickly.
"And would this 'nothing'," said George from his left side, "be a sort of 'nothing' that didn't happen to involve someone not called 'Draco Malfoy'?"
This was a bit too hard to work out, Harry thought, but he was spared by Molly, who had lunch on the table. It never ceased to amaze him how there was always food available at the Weasleys: four guests had dropped in unannounced, and yet lunch was there ten minutes later, with no signs of effort or panic.
They all ate their fill, and Molly suggested Ginny might like to help at the shop for the afternoon. Gin agreed enthusiastically, and Harry was sure that the truth was that she wanted to see Robin. But they had a very pleasant afternoon nonetheless, punctuated by two visits to Fortescue's. There would have been more, but Harry was still feeling rather guilty about the amount he'd eaten on Wednesday.
He decided to invite them all to dinner at Grimmauld Place, and the other five were all very happy to accept.
"Kreacher!" Harry called, and the elderly elf appeared with a pop. "Do you think you could feed all of us this evening!"
"Of course Master Harry!" Kreacher burbled. "There is being Ron and Hermione, and two Aurors, and six more for dinner?"
"Yes, that's right," said Harry, "oh and I'm sorry I didn't tell you I wasn't coming home last night but I didn't know myself till it happened."
"Master Harry is not needing to apologize to Kreacher!" the elf insisted, with some heat. "Kreacher is not being Master Harry's mother that he has to tell him everywhere he goes!"
Harry laughed. "Then perhaps you'd better apologize to Ron and Hermione for me instead. But I'll come and do it myself soon enough. Thank you, Kreacher."
"Thank you, Master Potter sir," chortled the house-elf, disapparating with a pop.
Dinner was another wonderful meal; Ron and Hermione were overjoyed to see him again and, like Kreacher, insisted that he didn't have to tell them where he was. Once more, the twins surrounded him; this time there was no elf-wine, but Kreacher produced some very nice wine from the house's cellar, and there was fire-whiskey as well.
For the third night in a row, Harry found himself having drunk more than was entirely good for him. The main effect, though, was to make him grin like a loon; the twins were delighted to find their little brother being a happy drunk, and quickly discovered that pinching him when he was drunk with wine made him giggle, which they found irresistible. By ten o'clock he was covered in red pinch marks; he was also out of it, falling asleep at the dinner table. They laid him gently on his bed and surrounded him with pillows, putting cushions on the floor in case he fell off, with a glass of water handy in case he woke up thirsty, and a bowl in case he needed to throw up. Neville, who had been careful not to drink too much, went back to guard the shop; he felt it was his job, after all, as caretaker. The twins told him he didn't have to, the protection spells would be enough, but he insisted.
Robin, the twins and Ginny decided to stay the night at Grimmauld Place "just to be sure Harry's all right". The twins were given separate beds in one bedroom, and chatted to one another happily for a long time. Gin and Robin were given adjoining rooms; when Gin went into hers, she found that Kreacher had enlarged the bed to queensize, and there was a communicating door to Robin's room. "Kreacher promises not to tell anyone," he said, with a wink.
So it's perhaps no surprise that Harry, the most drunk out of all of them, had the best sleep…

Thursday, May 14 1998
Thursday saw them all back in court again, this time including Ron and Hermione. The twins had come with them, but left for the shop soon afterwards, after making Harry promise to come and see them if he felt down again. Weasley's All-Purpose Pepper-Up Potion hadn't been quite up to getting rid of Harry's headache, but surprisingly Borage had obviously noticed the problem and quietly slipped him a phial of Hangover Cure, which worked instantly. Harry wondered if he had found another curmudgeonly Potions Master with a secret soft spot for him. He also wondered why the man carried Hangover Cure around with him; there was more to Mr Borage than met the eye, he decided.
Lucius's trial dragged on at great length, every point raised being discussed from many angles. Lucius, Harry noticed, was very clever: he stood up for himself when that was important, but occasionally would let the Wizengamot talk itself to a standstill, then add a few comments that turned the point around. It was a masterful reminder of just how good a politician the man was. Especially given that, like everyone else present, he had been given 'Expositor Falsitas' and so could not make any false statement.
Harry gave what evidence he could, again trying to convey a picture of a man whose family was held to ransom. He really had no idea what to expect from this trial – for Lucius, the Dementor's Kiss was a real possibility. His nightmare about Draco being Kissed came back to him and he realized that he didn't want that, not even for Lucius. Harry had freed Lucius's magic, he did feel something for him because of it, and he repeated what he had said to Kingsley on Monday: that Lucius may have been a bastard, and made his life uncomfortable; but that wasn't a crime. That Lucius had lived, and the Wizarding world couldn't decide who lived or died, but had to work with who was still alive. He talked about how they needed him to help the pure-bloods see that it wasn't about prejudice. He discussed how Lucius was respected by the other pure-bloods (he was a bit cagy about saying this; but he could see the pure-blooded members generally seemed to accept it) and could help them to see that the only way forward, the only future for all of them, was to work together.
When he sat down, Draco held his hand and whispered "thank you" in a voice full of emotion. Without thinking, Harry leant over and kissed him on the cheek. Draco took in a sharp breath, and looked around. But no-one had seen; and the reason why became clear when his eyes found Robin Banks, who gave him a little smile and mouthed 'notice-me-not'. The Auror had cast the charm to make sure that they had not been noticed. It was an incredible feeling to Draco to think that the Auror had actually gone out of his way to protect them like that.
In the end, Lucius was not sentenced to the Kiss. The Chief Warlock made it clear – without naming names – that this was largely due to Harry's testimony. Lucius was, however, sentence to five years in Azkaban.
Harry was stunned. He gasped, "oh no!" in such obvious distress that the whole courtroom looked at him.
"It's alright, Harry," Draco assured him; it wasn't really, but his father had been in Azkaban before, he would survive, Draco was sure.
"It's very touching that you care, Harry", Narcissa assured him; and he could see something of the same feeling in Lucius's eyes.
They had all accepted it; but Hermione Granger had other ideas. She jumped to her feet.
"May it please the court," she began, and Harry grinned just a little at how easily she used the pompous legal jargon, "I wonder if a suspended sentence might be suggested?"
There was a general hubbub and it became clear that this was a new thought for them.
"Thank you for the suggestion, my dear," Doge began, his tone polite, but giving nothing away, "but I wonder if you could explain its meaning?"
Asking Hermione Granger to explain a meaning was like asking Borage to brew you a potion or Snape to give you a detention, Harry thought, as she launched fearlessly into a long explanation of this new-to-them Muggle concept, and how it meant that Lucius would be out on license but if he committed any other crime in the five year period, the sentence would automatically be added to his new one.
"In a sense," Doge suggested, "it's allowing the defendant to show good faith, and work together with us as we rebuild our society after the ravages of the War – with a built-in punishment if he does not."
This suggestion seemed, rather begrudgingly, to be acceptable to the majority of the Wizengamot, and so a probation, like that for Draco, was instituted; but as his probation was of five years duration, it was agreed that, with certain spells and all dark magic explicitly prohibited, he would be allowed his wand from the start, while Draco would have to wait until Hogwarts resumed.

After the verdict, Lucius came up to Harry and shook his hand. But his face looked grim. He had schooled it to an impassive hardness, hiding the boiling pool of emotion that was inside him. He was about to attempt one of the hardest things he had ever done: he was going to try to beat the Debt of Magical Emancipation. No-one, he knew, had ever done it before; he suspected that in fact no-one had ever been foolish enough to attempt it. After all, how foolish was it to try to pull one over the man who had set him free from a – probably very short – life without magic?
But he felt he had to do something. Malfoys were not, would never be, slaves. He glossed over the little voice in his head that asked what he thought they had been under Voldemort, and spoke to Potter very quietly, making sure he was not overheard.
"Mr. Potter, thank you for your testimony on behalf of my family. But I feel that in the near future it would be better if we were not seen to be associated too closely. Accordingly, I must ask you not to continue to fraternize with my son."
Harry felt like his heart had just been ripped out. Not "fraternize" with Draco? When they were almost lovers?
And then it hit him, as anger rose through him: he had given Lucius his trust, and Lucius had played him like a maestro playing a violin. He had got exactly what he wanted – a clean slate, or as clean as they were going to achieve, for the Malfoys – and Harry was getting nothing.
An image came into his mind from his time living with the Dursleys, a memory of a Muggle game called tennis. If this were a tennis tournament, he thought, Lucius Malfoy would have won this set to love. But Harry was determined it would not be the match, as he apparated home with Ron and Hermione to Grimmauld Place to consider what to do next.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: I have set up a thread for replies at http://www2.adult-fanfiction.org/forum/index.php/topic/56042-review-replies-for-returning-to-sanity/ . I will generally try to reply to posts before posting a new chapter.
The title is from a quotation: "The people when rightly and fully trusted will return the trust" – Abraham Lincoln. Shame about Lucius, though! But of course Lincoln meant the people in general, not everyone in particular.
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Returning to Sanity