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Accidental Blood Bond	By : onecelestialbeing Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female > Lucius/Hermione Views: 45430 -:- Recommendations : 4 -:- Currently Reading : 16
Disclaimer: I own nothing from Harry Potter, no characters no magic, none of the story and I make no money from this!!

Chapter List
- 15
- 16
- 17
The next morning Hermione was in no mood to crawl from beneath the duvet. She'd been trying to convince Lucius to have a lie-in with her when he told her that it would be rude as they had guests.

"Who, Alyvya and Draco? I doubt they'll mind," she mumbled, turning over onto her other side.

"Not them. Although, I'm sure they're still asleep," he replied, pressing a kiss onto Hermione's neck. "I meant Severus and the young lady that returned to the manor with him last night."

Hermione's eyes instantly shot open, and she hastily turned around, nearly bumping heads with Lucius.

"Sorry!" she chirped. "What? Severus actually brought someone back with him?"

The look on her face was one of amusement and disbelief.

"Yes," Lucius replied evenly. "He has his own room here. Although, he rarely uses it when school is in session."

Hermione still wanted to go back to sleep, but the temptation of seeing Severus in another light was too great. Crawling out of bed, she slipped on her robe and followed Lucius downstairs.

"Good morning Severus," she greeted. "Janice."

"Hi Hermione," Janice greeted her with a shy grin.

Hermione sat down in the chair that Lucius pulled out for her. Severus was clad in a quilted, black dressing gown similar to Lucius'. He'd been reading the Daily Prophet and quietly sipping at a cup of tea when they'd come into the room.

Janice, whom looked uncharacteristically subdued, was also in a dressing robe, her hair mussed and lips appearing slightly red and swollen. She looked as if they'd spent the entire night shagging and then some. When her eyes caught Hermione's both girls flushed red, bowing their heads over their plates to keep the fits of laughter from erupting.

Hermione remembered what Lucius told her about Severus, but she still found that she was still unable to wrap her head around the idea of what had gone on between him and Janice the night before.

She reasoned if Severus had an sexual appetite that rivaled Lucius, then the young witch had probably been thrown for a loop, to say the least.

Breakfast seemed to go by entirely too slowly. When everyone finished eating, Janice subtlety motioned for Hermione to follow her.

"Excuse us," she said, placing her napkin down on the table and getting up.

"Where are they going?" Lucius asked distractedly, engrossed in the Daily Prophet that he'd taken from Severus.

"Most likely to gossip," the dark-haired wizard replied, draining the last of his teacup. "It doesn't matter what age witches are; prattling on remains a constant thing."

"Hmm," Lucius replied thoughtfully. After a few minutes he lowered his newspaper. "You know, I don't mean to pry, but what the hell did you say to that young lady yesterday?"

"Oh, that," Severus drawled with a sniff, picking up the teapot to refill his cup. "I told her if she could last ten minutes standing on those incredibly long legs of hers without holding onto anything while I took her from behind, that I'd give her a little slap-and-tickle with my tongue for an hour."

Lucius dropped the folded over Daily Prophet to the ornate carpeted floor, his rich laughter echoing off the walls.

"Remember, it was you that asked me if I was going to let her challenge me," Severus continued placidly. "Needless to say it was a classic case of check and mate."

Letting out a throaty chuckle, he took another slip of the fresh cup of tea.

"Hermione, love!" Janice yelped once they'd scampered off to her room. "Why the hell didn't you warn me!"

Hermione had fallen back onto her pillows, holding onto her stomach and laughing uproariously.

"I couldn't have told you what I didn't know!" she told her, nearly gasping.

"Well, I thought being as he's your fiancé's mate...anyway-Merlin! The man wouldn't let me sleep! I thought I could go on for hours, you know with playing Quidditch and all, but sweet Nimue's tit, the things that man can do with his hands and mouth! And let's not mention his-"

"Janice!" Hermione screamed, pulling a pillow over her head to muffle her shrieks lest she scare the portraits in the hallway.

"I'm telling you love," Janice continued, shaking her head. "He's ruined it for other blokes. Didn't you say he used to be your professor?"

"Yes. He was, before becoming headmaster."

"Bloody hell, I would have loved to serve detention with him, know what I mean?" she grinned salaciously, waggling her eyebrows up and down.

"Hah!" Hermione retorted. "If you so much as looked at the man the wrong way back then, he would have taken house points and then assigned you a real detention, skinning centipedes or something equally disgusting."

"Really? He was a proper gentleman the entire time," Janice mused. "Even when he was shagging me witless!"

"Oh my," Hermione chuckled. "Well then, make sure you see him off properly before he leaves."

"Oh right, damn. I guess he has to go back to the school," she continued dejectedly. "I don't know how we, rather I, made it to breakfast."

At that point Janice started yawning before a devilish grin took over her face. "I wanted to have a lie-in, but he threatened to shag me again if I didn't get out of the bed. That was all it took. I don't think I could have taken much more."

"You know, I can see where you and Ginny are friends," Hermione laughed. "Except, I think she's the aggressor when it comes to her and Harry."

"Yeah, yeah, aggressor on and off the field. For someone so small I've seen Ginny make witches taller than me cower in fear when she gets that look on her face!"

"She gets it from her brothers," Hermione laughed. "You don't hang around that lot without their ways rubbing off on you."

"Tell me about it," Janice said, rolling her eyes. "Especially those twins; they're a right crack up! They're hilarious when they come to the games. Anyway love, let me get back and see if Severus is up for another go. You've my info, owl me when you're having your do, all right?"

"All right, Janice."

"Don't forget now!"

Hermione promised that she wouldn't forget and watched as the tall, dusty haired witch walked out of her room.

The image of Janice and Severus rolling around in the sheets sent her into another throe of loud laughter.

"Oh no, I'm sorry love," she said, patting her tummy when she felt the flutter.

Pulling her pajama top up, Hermione was enthralled to find that she was able to actually see her stomach moving. She was still poking and prodding at herself when Lucius came into her bedroom.

"This child refuses to stay in one place," she explained when he sat down on the bed next to her and placed a hand on her tummy.

"It seems we've got ourselves a little Quidditch player."

"Possibly. Though, I'm sure that's the Malfoy half of this baby. It took a lot of convincing and cajoling for Harry and the others to get me on a broomstick the few times they were successful."

"What's wrong, Hermione? Scared of heights?" Lucius asked with a smirk. "You weren't apprehensive in the least when you climbed me."

"You'll soon be referring to yourself as Mount Lucius," Hermione retorted, playfully nibbling his arm. "By the way, do twins run in your family?"

"Not that I'm aware of. Why do you ask?"

"Because Fred and George hinted that I might be carrying two babies instead of one."

Lucius gave a light chuckle, still running his palm in circles over Hermione's stomach. "What, are you daunted by the idea of two babies?"

"At one time, a bit, yes," she confessed. "I'd hardly know what to do with one baby, never mind two at a time."

"Hermione, you will be fine, don't I keep telling you that? Besides you, me, and Draco, you have the entire Weasley clan as well as Harry and Ginevra. Most likely you won't find a moment to claim the child as your own by the time they're done."

"All right, I'll stop worrying, but you know I can't help it."

"Believe me, I'd noticed. Now if you're up to it I'd like to show you something."

"I'm fine. Lead the way."

Lucius neatly pulled Hermione's pajama top back down over her swollen belly. He then helped her up off the bed and led her out to the hallway.

"It seems Janice and Severus hit it off well. She hasn't come back to my room."

Lucius was barely able to keep a straight face. "That's because she's more than likely indisposed at the moment."

"I still can't believe it..."

Janice was in fact indisposed. As soon as she'd gotten back to the room, Severus pounced on her like a predator going in for the kill.

Before she'd been able to say anything, she'd been divested of her robe, pajama bottoms and knickers.

"For the love of Circe, Severus!" she shouted as he bent her in half over the bed.

"Circe can't help you now," he purred in her ear, wrapping one hand around her long, tawny hair. "And you know you like this, so take it like a good little witch."

The nonverbal contraceptive spell he'd used that morning was still in place. With the other hand on her back, he slowly moved down her spine, his fingertips brushing against the spot that made her jump. Continuing onwards, Severus palmed Janice's curvy behind, his middle finger brushing against her already dampened slit.

Janice swore loudly when two fingers slipped inside of her and proceeded to skillfully manipulate the highly sensitized spot that no other wizard had been able to previously find. Severus was simultaneously rubbing her clit with his thumb, causing her to come easily after a minute, leaving a thick trail of her juices on his hand.

Janice barely had time to recover from her first orgasm when Severus replaced his fingers with his cock, thrusting forward into her pulsating flesh with one easy swoop of his hips, making her sharply cry out in the process.

"I'm not hurting you, am I?" he asked quietly, pausing for a moment.

Janice let out a breathless 'no', moaning into the duvet as she was steadily worked from behind. Seconds later she exploded with a force, her usually husky voice now shrill at the height of pleasure.

Her legs were trembling unsteadily, and she had to grip onto the duvet to keep from falling, her knuckles turning white at the exertion.

"It seems as if we need to work on your balance," Severus told her, pressing his weight into Janice to keep her from slipping.

"It's your damned fault," she moaned, her body still trembling. "You're going to kill me with that thing!"

"Just a bit."

Severus then withdrew from Janice's body, pushing her to lie stomach down on the bed.

"At least you won't fall this way," he continued, hovering over my body.

"Thank goodness, before I fall and break my nose. It's a miracle its stayed intact throughout all of our games."

"And it will be intact after we're done. Although, it might be the only part of your body that is by the time I'm through with you."

Moaning in anticipation, Janice felt Severus straddling her thighs and holding onto her hips before plunging back into her sodden heat.

"This is gorgeous!" Hermione exclaimed as she looked around the room Lucius had brought her to.

They were standing in the barely used but prettily decorated nursery, and Hermione was cheerfully taking in everything.

The baby bed was made of a smooth, dark wood and had a dark grey ruffle around the bottom and a matching canopy over it. The furniture was also the same color as the baby bed, even the rocking chair set by the large bay windows.

"Understandably the room hasn't been used since Draco was a baby, but you're more than welcome to redecorate if you wish. Unless you'd like to utilize one of the other rooms."

"No, it's perfect in here," she replied, not even put off by the thin layer of dust on everything. "Everything just needs a bit of cleaning. Erm, do you think Draco would mind?"

"I very much doubt that," Lucius answered. "Beside,s as soon as the little blighter was able to crawl, he would scurry his way out of here. Draco never wanted to stay in his crib, he would somehow climb over the bars and make his way to the floor. We had to keep a Cushioning Charm in place."

Hermione giggled at the thought of Draco as a baby, scaling the bars of his crib and making his way out of the nursery. "Where was he trying to go?"

"Where else but to Narcissa?" Lucius replied with a gripe. "Of course right when we were indisposed."

Hermione was now leaning against the wooden bureau, laughing hysterically at Draco interrupting his parents when they were having sex. "Do you mean to tell me he managed to crawl all the way from here to your suite?" she asked between gasps.

"Well, it was usually Narcissa's room, and it wasn't far from here. But I'm telling you, the child was a menace. He'd whimper and bang his little fists at the door until she opened it, crying and wanting to be picked up. More than once I'm positive that I saw him smirk at me from over Cissy's shoulder."

"Would you expect anything less?" Hermione asked, still laughing. "You Malfoy men are the same no matter what age; you simply must have your way, damned the consequences."

"You say that as if it's a bad thing," Lucius replied with a smirk. "If I hadn't been tenacious then you and I wouldn't be standing here, now would we?" He then pressed a kiss to Hermione's forehead, running one hand over her belly. "In a few months you'll become well acquainted with another little Malfoy wizard."

"And what happens if it's a little Malfoy witch?"

Lucius paused for a moment, as if he hadn't considered that fact that Hermione might've been carrying a girl.

"Then I'm setting a spell on her that will cause boils to grow on any young wizards, good intention or otherwise, that dares to come within my daughter's proximity."

"Lucius, you can't do that!"

"I can, and I will," he archly replied. "And that's just one of my harmless curses. There are nastier ones I'm privy to."

"Oh, you cheeky wizard," Hermione retorted, grabbing him by the hand. "Come along then. I have a craving for chocolate biscuits and you're going to help me make them."

"I'm not a bloody house-elf!"

"I don't care! You're the one that ate the last of them, so you can help me make some more."

Still complaining under his breath, Lucius grudgingly allowed Hermione to pull him out of the nursery and down to the kitchens.

"Lucius, do you know that woman?" Hermione discreetly asked, shuffling her napkin on her lap. "She keeps staring at us."

It was a few weeks later, and Lucius had taken Hermione out for lunch. He was surprised when she agreed to go shopping for baby clothes and such. After they had a discussion of things that needed to be purchased, she'd gone into 'Hermione-mode' and made a list that seemed to grow with each owl sent between her, Molly and Tonks.

Lucius had calmly explained that he knew what the baby would need, but the little witch grew snappish, telling him that she needed the others opinion since they were both mothers. He shook his head yet remained silent, knowing better than to point out that he was also a father and perfectly capable of handling similar affairs.

Once they'd gotten through a long morning of dashing in and out of shops, as well as numerous calls for Tipsy to take away each parcel, Hermione announced that she needed to rest for a bit. At her suggestion, Lucius Apparated them to one of his favorite restaurants.

They were sitting for all of a few minutes when Hermione had looked away from their table, turning her head back with her forehead furrowed.

Lucius had been busy with admiring the witch directly across the table from him. Hermione had worn a deep blue dress that seemed to enhance her already glowing face. Her hair was partially pulled back, the rest of it cascading over her shoulders in loose curls, and the only jewelry she'd worn was the pendant Lucius had given her and her engagement ring.

There were a few familiar faces in the restaurant that showed a glimmer of surprised when the elder Malfoy walked in with the pretty and obviously younger witch on his arm. Usually, he dined alone or came with Severus, the odd time Draco was a member of their party.

"What are you talking about, love?" he asked.

"I'm talking about that scary looking bint at the table against the wall," Hermione answered. "I know you didn't shag her. She doesn't seem like the sort you'd have gone for at all. In fact, she looks rather ghastly. Hell, she looks like she wanted to shag you but didn't get the chance, what with her shooting daggers over here."

"Hermione, who the hell-" Lucius stopped short, turning his head to see no other than Maddie Barthodly heading in his direction. As usual, her robes were low cut and too tight, her shape resembling that of his great-grandmother's old china cabinet.

"Lucius, darling! I thought I was going mad for a moment, then I realized it was in fact you sitting here!" she bellowed in a raucous voice.

"Madam Barthodly," he replied tightly. "This is my fiancée Hermione."

Hermione politely mustered a 'hello', trying not to cringe at the clashing over-applied rouge and lipstick on the older witch's face.

"Fiancée?" she cackled. "She seems a bit young, don't you think Lucius? I'm sure I'd still be able to smell milk and bubblegum on her breath."

"Better milk and bubblegum than dust and firewhiskey," Hermione sweetly replied, her eyes never straying once from Maddie's.

"Well!" Maddie haughtily replied, pulling her cloak tightly about her shoulders as if she was affronted. "It seems as if your witch has no manners!"

"Only to those whom are deserving," Lucius spat. He wanted to bellow out into laughter at Hermione's snappy response but was too aggravated by the bawdy witch barging in on their meal. "Now, do yourself a favor and go back to your seat," he continued quietly, trying to not cause a scene.

"Lucius, do you really-" she began, only to get cut off.

"Madam Bartholdy, don't make me repeat myself," Lucius said, his grip visibly tightening on his walking stick. "Now chivvy along, unless you'd like to have a chat with Hermione and I about the mysterious deaths of your last five husbands."

Hermione nearly snickered uncontrollably, but stopped when she looked up at Lucius and saw his icy grey eyes shining dangerously at the older witch. She finally slunk away, her face bright beneath the slipshod placed rouge.

"For the love of Merlin, is that who Severus was talking about?" Hermione hissed incredulously.

"Yes," Lucius answered between gritted teeth, sitting back down and resting his walking stick down beside him. "As you can see he wasn't exaggerating."

Shuddering slightly in disgust, Hermione began a light-hearted conversation with Lucius in an attempt to calm him down.

The rest of their meal had gone by without another hitch, and the two returned to Malfoy Manor. Hermione unleashed a wide yawn, telling Lucius that she was going up for a nap. He gave her a small kiss on the forehead, stating that he'd be in his study.

Opting to sleep in Lucius' room, Hermione made her way up to his suite. Stripping down to her bra and knickers, she slipped in between the cool, grey sheets and closed her eyes.

"Look at her, she's been shagging her wizard so much that she can't even keep her eyes open."

Hermione stirred out of her sleep, hearing a familiar voice above her head. Opening her eyes, she looked up to see Ginny perched next to her on the bed, an amused look on her face.

"About bloody time you woke up," she smirked. "You nearly sleep like the dead, did you know that?"

"I'm sixth months pregnant, what else would you expect?" Hermione snapped back, sitting up and reclining on the pillows. "As it were, hello to you too, Mrs. Potter. What happened, did you manage to wear your husband out already?"

Ginny grinned broadly before winking one brown eye. "Harry's more resilient than he looks-trust me."

Hermione cringed, desperately trying to ignore the innuendo.

"Now get your arse out of that bed and get dressed. I'm famished and I'd like dinner," the redhead continued, sliding off the bed and onto the floor.

"Speaking of arses, you're a pain in mine," Hermione grumbled. "You're bad as your brother, inconveniencing me for the sake of your stomach."

"Do not compared me to that prat. He'd bite my arm off just to make his way to the kitchen. Anyway, Lucius invited me round for supper, so chivvy along, I haven't got all day."

"So you've come round to stuff your face and order me about? What would Harry say about your abominable behavior?"

"Harry would know better to than to contradict me, and would keep his gob shut. Now, get your arse up out of that bed!"

Shooting Ginny an impassive look, Hermione took her time pushing back the duvet and getting out of bed. She'd forgotten that she only had on her underwear until Ginny's eyes fell to her protruding stomach.

"Wow, that stuff Mum made you really does work. There isn't a single mark on your skin."

"I know," Hermione mused, glancing down. "My own mum wasn't so lucky. She teased me about leaving stripes on her body. She was ever so amused when I got into Gryffindor and told her that the a lion was our house's blazon."

She gave another chuckle before pressing her hand to the side of the stomach.

"What's wrong?" Ginny asked, her eyes growing round.

"Oh nothing, he's just kicking," Hermione answered, her hand rubbing small circles into the area. "At least he waited until I got out of bed."

"So you're having a little wizard then?"

"Actually, I still don't know. Healer Lora kept trying to get me to let her run the diagnostic charm to find out if the baby is a boy or girl but I want to be surprised."

"Or what if it's one of each, like Fred and George suggested?" Ginny asked grinning gleefully. "Can you imagine, a little Hermione and a little Lucius? Or maybe it will be reversed, a wayward little witch with blonde hair and a brunette, bookworm of a wizard."

"If I have twins, you and Harry are going to be doing loads of babysitting. And just you wait until you're pregnant, Ginny. I'm going to enjoy taking the piss at you."

Ginny continued laughing, walking around the bed to stand in front of Hermione. "Is he still kicking?" she asked in a quiet voice.

"Yes, he's upset because a boisterous redheaded witch interrupted his kip. Do you want to feel?"

Nodding her head, Ginny allowed Hermione to take her hand and press it on the side of her belly. The baby had gone still for awhile and Hermione told her to wait a second, right then feeling the little thump of him moving about.

"What does it feel like?" Ginny asked reverently, her hand still in place.

"Sort of like a heavy fluttering," she answered.

Right then a knock came from the bedroom door, and Lucuis poked his head inside.

"Ginevra, have you-" he began, pausing when he found Ginny standing before Hermione whom was only dressed in her bra and knickers. "That answers my question. There's no need to rush to dinner, take your time," Lucius told them, giving his half dressed mate a lingering, appreciative look before slipping back out of the bedroom.

"Well, if you hadn't already been undressed, Lucius would have surely done so with his own eyes," Ginny chortled, locating Hermione's abandoned dress and handing it to her.

Rolling her eyes, Hermione slipped the offered garment over her head and followed Ginny out of the room.

They'd stopped in her bedroom first, Ginny promptly going to Hermione's bathroom to greet it 'hello' before walking over to her oversized closet.

"What are you doing?" she asked, hearing the rustle of hangers being moved about.

"Finding something for you to change in," came the muffled reply.

Hermione shook her head, sitting down in her armchair while Ginny took control of her closet. She soon emerged bearing a patterned wrap dress. "You can fit this; put it on," she said, chucking the item in her friend's lap.

"Ordered about in my own room," Hermione said under her breath. "The temerity you possess is astounding."

"Your endearing words never fail to charm me," Ginny replied dryly. "Say, are those swings still hung up in that room where we had my hen do?"

Hermione cocked her head to the side, trying to remember if the house-elves had taken them down. "Yes, they should still be in place," she replied, tying the sash on her dress. "Don't tell him I told you, but I even got Lucius to sit on one and he let me push him."

The image of the aristocratic wizard, clad in a brocade waistcoat and clutching onto his serpent headed walking stick whilst perched in one of the dainty, white swings was too much for Ginny to handle. She laughed until she choked, causing Hermione to dash over to her and thump her on the back.

"Sorry," she gasped one she'd caught her breath. "It's just-it's so funny!"

"You idiot," Hermione told her, unable to stop her own laughter. "Shall we stop by before dinner then? Since you're insistent upon reverting back to your seven year old self."

"Oh, put a sock in it, Hermione. The idea of Lucius on that swing is funny and you know it. Yes, let's stop by. I can mentally rehash my lovely hen do at the same time. Oh, it was fabulous! I can't thank you enough."

"I'm glad you enjoyed it, love," she replied as they walked out of her bedroom. "I still can't get over your mates. I don't think I've ever laughed that hard."

"Janice and Snape seemed to hit it off," Ginny said conspiratorially. "I didn't find out that they'd left together until Harry and I returned from our honeymoon. We met up for coffee and the girl was practically glowing!"

Hermione bit down on her lip, remembering how she'd run into Janice the morning after the wedding. She looked as if she'd spent the rest of her night as well as a good part of the morning shagging.

"She won't admit to anything, but I still think those two are seeing one another. Either way, good on them. Snape always seemed like he needed someone to undo those buttons on that tight suit and properly shag him."

"Ginny!"

"What?"

Hermione sighed and shook her head. She still didn't fancy trying to picture other couples in intimate positions. The irony of it all, was that Severus had been the one to surpass Janice's so-called sexual prowess. She'd looked just how Hermione had when she first started sleeping with Lucius- completely disheveled, utterly knackered but thoroughly satisfied.

"Ginny, I still don't know why you-" Hermione began when they got to the large room. She'd just flicked her wand to put on the lights when a clatter of voices rang out, yelling 'surprise!'

Hermione was flummoxed and nearly dropped her wand, looking around at the decorated room and the grinning faces. All of Ginny's Quidditch mates were there, along with Luna, Alyvya, Tonks, Fleur, as well as Molly and professor McGonagall.

There was a banner that had been charmed to go between words 'Hermione's Baby Shower' and "Hermione's Hen Do'.

"It's about time you woke up, love!" she heard Tabitha call out as she walked over to hug Hermione. "I nearly thought we were going to have to take this party to the your bedroom!"

"Oh my goodness!" Hermione cried happily as everyone rounded up to hug her. "How did you manage this?"

"It was Ginny and your young man's doing," Molly said, giving her a gentle squeeze. "She's been planning this for weeks."

"Well I suppose I can forgive you for your rude awakening," Hermione cheekily told her friend. "I woke up and Ginny was hovering over me!"

"She bloody does that to all of us!" Adrienne jeered. "Do you know how many times I threatened to knock her on her arse in the mornings?"

"That's because all you slags, with the exception of Willow, want to do is have a lie in when we need to practice!" Ginny shouted back, earning wide eyed glances from her Mum and McGonagall.

"Sorry," she muttered when she noticed their faces.

"It's perfectly all right, Mrs. Potter," McGonagall told her with a wink.

Molly was still shaking her head at her daughter when she led Minerva to sofa by the window. Alyvya, Ginny and Luna led Hermione to her seat of honor, a white wicker chair that had obviously been decorated by the carefree, blonde witch.

"All right, all right, how about a game first?" Ginny suggested over the noise.

"Yes!" Anna and Tonks said at the same time.

"All right," Ginny said sounding rather focused, using her wand to conjure a small box of safety pins. "Each of you gets one, and whomever has the most pins at the end wins. The idea is you can't say the word 'baby' and you can't cross your legs or ankles. Whoever catches you and calls it out gets your pin. To up the ante, since this is also a hen do, Hermione can't say Lucius' name, and if she breaks the rules we'll decide on an appropriate forfeit."

Fleur offered to pass the safety pins around, to which everyone fastened one to their clothing. Molly and Minerva looked supremely uncomfortable sitting without crossing their ankles, but some of the other witches had no problem sitting with their feet apart.

Trisha, Tabitha, Janice and Tonks decided to make light of the situation and took it upon themselves to exaggeratedly move their legs far apart as possible.

"D'you ever notice how some blokes tend to sit like this?" Trisha asked, sitting on the edge of the couch and straddling it as if she was on a broom. "Maybe they're trying to prove something, what d'you think?"

"Definitely overcompensating," Tonks agreed, nodding her head. "Some of the wizards I work with do that at the office. I should put a Sticking Charm on their legs; why do I need to come round the corner and see their dangly bits pressed against the front of their trousers?"

Molly's looked completely gobsmacked, growing even more shocked when she looked next to her and found Minerva in stitches.

"She does have a point, Molly. I've had to delicately hint to some of our previous professors that robes didn't cover everything."

"For goodness sake," she scoffed, shaking her head.

Fleur had finished passing the pins around, and went to sit down and primly cross her legs when Minerva caught her.

"Oh!" she gasped, handing over her pin to the elderly witch.

"Thank you!" Minerva chirped, pinning it to her tartan dress.

"Ginny, where did you find this game?" Hermione asked with a giggle.

"Willow suggested it," she answered. "Her mum's a Muggle and we went to her house and looked it up on the...what did you say that thing was called?"

"A laptop," Willow answered.

"Yeah, that," Ginny replied, her face turning up into a wicked grin. "I also found a game for your hen party but it involved a courgette and a..." Her voice trailed off when she realized that her Mum and McGonagall were in the room. "Well, I'll tell you about that one later."

Platters of food as well as an assortment of drinks suddenly appeared on one of the long tables pushed against the wall. Hermione had pushed to her feet to prepare a plate when Molly loudly fussed in her direction, making her sit back down.

Ginny rolled her eyes when her mum wasn't looking. Molly bustled over with Hermione's food and a glass of juice. Only when she turned to talk away did Ginny approach her, switching her glass of juice with a glass of wine. Hermione was about to protest until she remembered what Lucius had told her.

"Oi, wotcher!" she suddenly heard Tonks yelp from the table, followed by the sound of glass falling and breaking.

"Tonks!" Molly and Ginny yelled at the same time.

"Mrs. Lupin, perhaps you should sit down," came McGonagall's voice. "I don't think Mr. Malfoy will take too kindly to you destroying his house."

"Err, suppose you're right. Molly d'you think you could-"

"Yes, I'll fetch your plate. But please, for the love of Merlin, don't touch anything else!"

Tonks resumed her place on the sofa, a sheepish look on her face as she winked across at Hermione. "Tell Lucius that I'm sorry about the glass. I'm still dead clumsy on my feet."

"It's alright," Hermione soothed. "Look, McGonagall's already repaired the glass," she said, pointing at the now clean floor.

Once everyone had settled back down with their food and drinks, Luna set her plate down beside her and walked over to Molly.

"You crossed your ankles, Mrs. Weasley," she told her in a soft voice, holding out her hand.

"Oh, you!" Molly scoffed, a smirk on her face as she handed over her pin.

Luna gave her a little smile, attaching the safety pin to one already dangling from her collar and went to sit back down.

Five minutes passed before Minerva caught Willow with her legs crossed and took her pin. Hermione as highly amused, never seeing her previous Head of House in a less than straitlaced state.

Ginny told Hermione that McGonagall and her mum weren't going to stay late, and asked if she minded if they cut the cake early. Hermione told her no, and it was cut and served by a bossy Molly that chastised Tonks when she nearly dropped her plate. Fleur hastily used a Hovering Charm before the slice of cake was able to meet the floor, causing a flushed Tonks to grin bashfully and thank her.

Once Molly and Minerva left, it seemed as if Ginny and the rest of her Quidditch mates let out a collective sigh.

"Blimey, Ginny. You know I love your mum and all, but it's hard to control my tongue around her!" Janice said.

"Who are you telling?" Ginny replied. "It doesn't matter that I'm bloody married, she still thinks I'm a child. But the funny thing is, her mouth is worse than mine! Do you know how many times I've heard her using all sorts of colorful language with my brothers?"

"Why were you so eager for Molly to leave?" Hermione nearly hooted, her eyes suddenly going wide. "Please tell me you lot don't have some half naked man coming here!"

The girls broke into laughter at the panicked expression on Hermione's face. Adrienne and Anna waggled their eyebrows in her direction, until Ginny cut in with a giggle.

"No, I didn't call for a stripper so you can relax. Unless Luna wants to see Ailen?"

Grinning widely, she turned to look at the blonde witch, whose ears turned pink at the mention of her beau.

"Say, Luna, how is your fancy bloke?" Adrienne asked with a knowing smile.

"He's fine," she shyly answered. "He took me out for ice cream last week."

"How sweet!" Fleur said, beaming at Luna.

"Just ice cream, Luna?" Janice asked suggestively. "No happy endings stuck somewhere in there?"

Peals of laughter broke out, Adriene reaching across to slap Janice on the leg.

"I told you, she's a good little witch! Unlike you slag. Speaking of which, what happened with you and Mister Tall, Dark and Broody? You bloody left without saying goodbye."

"Yeah, Janice, how did that go?" Anna asked, her green eyes intently focused on her friend.

"Umm..." Janice mumbled into her glass, taking a large swig of wine.

Her friends promptly began cracking up, seeing the two rosy spots of color bloom on her cheeks.

"Damndest me, that's the first time I've seen her out of sorts!" Willow gasped, tears running down her face. "That must've been some round of slap-and-tickle!"

Janice bit down on her bottom lip, trying to control the slightly drunken grin that was beginning to spread on her face. Just hearing Severus' name sent a jolt from her stomach down to between her legs. What she thought would turn out to only be a one-off had evolved into something else. While it wasn't a relationship, they certainly enjoyed each other's company.

Whenever he was able to get away from the school, he'd Floo to Janice's house where they'd go at it for a few hours. A few times she'd been too sore for a repeat performance and they spent the evening chatting in bed with glasses of wine and a tin of biscuits. She'd found him to be an excellent conversationalist, and realized that his surly disposition was usually utilized when needed. Janice was surprised when he told her that he'd been highly amused by her and her little friends antics. She grumbled that she'd never live it down, while climbing out of bed and asking Severus if he wanted anything from the kitchen. He'd salaciously eyed her, lightly slapping on her on the bum in response.

"For the love of Merlin, look at her. She's pissed already, daydreaming about her bloke," Tabby called softly across to the pondering witch.

"Oh, shut it," Janice snapped, taking another gulp of wine.

"So it Lucius going out for a stag do?" Tonks suddenly asked.

"Well, he hasn't mentioned it," Hermione said, taking extra care not to say his name. With her luck, they'd have her do something silly if she slipped up. "It wouldn't surprise me if he, Draco and Severus were in his study tossing back his aged brandy, taking the piss at one another."

Hermione's words couldn't have been truer. Soon as McGonagall had returned to Hogwarts, Severus used the Floo in his office to travel to Malfoy Manor.

"So what sort of revelry has Miss Weasley-excuse me-Mrs. Potter planned for your betrothed?" he asked Lucius after settling down onto his favorite chair, glass in hand.

"Nothing as wild as her own hen party, from what I've been told," he replied, swirling his own glass. "Ginevra didn't mention anything about hired male entertainment."

"Don't tell me you're jealous, Lucius," the dark wizard smirked over at his friend.

Lucius quirked one eyebrow, taking a sip of his brandy before speaking. "Believe me, jealously is not a word in my vocabulary. Besides, I'm the only wizard that Hermione has eyes for, I've made sure of that."

"Father!" Draco shouted, all sorts of images about the two running through his head. "Can we stay away from the double entendres for at least one evening?"

The elder Malfoy smirked at his son. "Really, Draco. It's a good thing your room is on the other side of the manor. Who knows what we'd be liable to hear with the way you and Alyvya go at each other."

Severus turned to his godson. "What, is that little witch too much for you to handle?"

"You should talk," Draco shot back. "What about you and Ginny's mate, what's her name?"

"Janice," Severus replied with a thin-lipped smile, standing up and walking over to the drink cart to replenish his glass.

"You randy, old sods," the younger blonde retorted. "Both of you with witches my age."

"Draco, take the knot out of your wand and stop being a spoilsport," Lucius drawled. "You'll catch up one day, not to worry."

"Who knows, you might even learn something?" Severus added, throwing his godson a smug look.

"You two are mad," Draco replied, looking down into his brandy.

"Anyway, guess who we ran into earlier at lunch?" Lucius continued, turning towards Severus whom merely raised his eyebrow questioningly. "That batty cow, Maddie. Would you believe she had the audacity to interrupt our meal and then insult Hermione?"

"Well that's no big shock, the woman is unscrupulous. So what happened?"

Lucius chuckled, looking highly pleased with himself. "Let's just say that I don't think she'll ever try to embarrass my witch again. She nearly had to have her face picked up and handed to her by the time we were both through. Bloody hell, the woman's a beast! Whomever told her those robes looked good needed to be shoved into a street and hexed within an inch of their life."

"What did Granger say?" Draco asked, rejoining the conversation.

Lucius repeated the exchange between Hermione and the tactless older witch, causing Severus and Draco to laugh raucously.

"She's a little spitfire," Lucius commented, thinking back to the times he'd been on the receiving end of Hermione's asperity. "But I wouldn't have it any other way."

Hermione's baby shower turned hen party was still going strong. Everyone had given Luna their safety pins, to which she fashioned into a few bracelets and donned, soft clinking noises coming from her wrist whenever she moved. Multiple glasses of wine had been consumed along with more of the cake, the picture of the baby on top now completely mangled from Tonk's cocked up effort at helping to serve everyone seconds.

Tabitha suggested of game of Naughty Treasure Hunt, and once she listed the things that needed to be searched for everyone passed out with laughter. Reading off a scrap of parchment, she announced that they needed to find a pair of saucy witch's knickers, men's pants, preferably worn and still warm, phallic shaped food, an aphrodisiac, a sex toy, something from the groom, a temporary breasts enhancement potion, and the most gorgeous bloke they could find.

"Where in ruddy hell are we going to find a sex toy and a potion to make your knockers grow?" Anna squealed, drunkenly slapping on hand on her thigh.

"Don't worry, I have the extras here," Tabby soothed, using her wand to Accio her rucksack and plopping it down on the floor.

They watched as she withdrew a two pairs of lacy black knickers with the tags still attached, one purple and one blue sex toy still in their box, and two small, pink glass vials with a picture of a witch clad in a corselet on it.

"I'm scared to ask where you found all of that," Tonks commented with a giggle.

"I got it at The Wicked Witch, it's not far from Diagon Alley," Tabby told her, winking one hazel eye. "They specialize in this sort of thing. Now because this house is so big, I think we should split into two groups."

"Sounds good, but who's going to hide this stuff?" Ginny asked. "It's not as if one of us can."

Hermione adjusted the pink sash across her body that read 'Bride-to-be' and straightened the feathered veil on her head that similar to the one Ginny wore, only Luna had charmed one pink and one blue tiny plastic baby into place on one side.

"I know, I'll ask Tipsy," she said, calling out for the house-elf. "Tipsy, can you please hide these for us? We're playing a game, but you can just stick to this floor. I don't want anyone getting completely lost." Hermione said, handing the wide eye house-elf the items.

Tipsy still looked mildly apprehensive yet clutched everything in her little arms before disappearing with a soft pop.

"Okay, Tonks, Fleur, Willow, Anna and Tabby, we'll be on one team," Ginny called out. "Hermione, Adrienne, Janice, Trisha, Alyvya and Luna with be on the other team. At least we'll be able to find out way around this castle of a house."

The group waited until Tipsy popped back into view, telling Hermione that everything had been hidden.

"All right, you lot. We have twenty minutes to find everything, so get moving! And no using your wands!" Tabby shouted gleefully.

Everyone laughed as they scrambled up from their sitting places, rushing out of the door and filing into the hallway. They'd made it all of a few steps to the grand staircase when Tonks tripped over her own feet, falling against the wall and causing each portrait to begin swearing loudly in a domino effect.

"Blimey, Hermione! And I thought Sirius' mum's picture was bad!" she yelped, hastily standing upright.

Everyone giggled loudly, finally breaking off into two groups.

Hermione led everyone to the kitchen to get a banana to serve as the phallic shaped food item, as it was the easiest thing to find. They made so much noise in the process that Elva and Elvina seemed almost frightened.

"All right, that was easy enough," Alyvya grinned after they left. "Now what about everything else?"

"Let's go back upstairs before the others get there," Trisha suggested.

It took awhile for them to make their way back to the room, as Adrienne's three glasses of wine suddenly made her lightheaded, and she promptly fell to her behind at the foot of the steps.

"Get your arse up!" Janice hollered with laughter.

"Are you okay?" Luna asked, concern flooding her blue eyes.

"Yes love, thank you for asking, unlike my tart of a friend that's taking the piss at me," Adrienne replied, grasping onto Alyvya's outstretched hand.

"Your house-elf is brilliant, Hermione," Trisha grumbled after they'd been looking for the knickers, potion or sex toy for the past 5 minutes. "I say we move onto something else on our list."

"Alright," Alyvya mused. "Oh, we need an aphrodisiac."

"Wait!" Janice chirped, running into the room where they were holding the party and returning with an unopened bottle of wine. "Hey, it makes me hot and bothered. What's next?"

"Men's pants, worn and warm," Hermione replied with a laugh. "Someone I don't think Lucius would take too kindly to me asking for his to put on display for everyone."

"Well, at least we can pick the handsomest blokes we know," Alyvya offered. "Where did you say they are, the study?"

Hermione's face immediately brightened. "Yes! Oh, that's brilliant. Come along, let's go fetch our wizards."

Lucius, Severus and Draco were engrossed in their manly banter when the knock came at his study door.

Setting down his nearly empty glass, Lucius got up and walked over to find his fiancée and half of her guests standing in behind her. He greeted the grinning witches before turning to Hermione. "What is it love, do you need something?"

"Yes...sort of. Do you mind if we borrow you for a moment? It's for a game."

Draco and Severus leaned over from their place on the leather sofa, trying to peek around Lucius to see what was going on.

"Not at all," Lucius told her, ushering the lot inside.

"We need Severus and Draco as well," Hermione continued.

"What for?" Draco asked suspiciously, looking up at his smirking girlfriend.

"Just play along, Draco," Alyvya told him with a smile. "We don't do anything embarrassing, I promise."

"Pluck up your courage, Draco," Severus commented dryly. "Your witch needs you."

"You as well, Severus," Hermione smirked. "Oh, Lucius, I need to borrow your walking stick as well."

Lucius arched an eyebrow yet complied without a word, the three men following in behind Hermione and her friends.

"All right, you lot. Let's have it," Ginny said once they were back in the room.

Everyone had been surprised to see Lucius, Severus and Draco returned with the girls and eyed them curiously. Ginny's team managed to find the knickers and potion, along with a banana, a miniature box of Honeydukes chocolate and what looked like a quill.

"What's up with the quill?" Janice asked.

"We needed to borrow something from the groom," Ginny answered with a smirk. "So I asked Lucius if I could borrow it."

Hermione turned to look at Lucius whom merely grinned back at her. Shaking her head, she stepped forward to lay her items down. "And," she continued, gesturing towards the three wizards, "We've found the handsomest blokes we know."

Alyvya, Hermione and Janice were all cheekily grinning. Draco was cringing in a pleased sort of way yet Severus and Lucius were laughing.

"That's one hell of a walking stick," Anna mused, looking at the serpent head with its pointed teeth.

"So whose won?" Tabby asked from her place on the floor.

"I believe it's a tie, unless I'm that pissed," Ginny said, cocking her head to one side. "Who gives a damn, let's have more wine!"

The group broke up to retrieve their abandoned wine glasses, save for Draco, Alyvya, Janice and Severus whom stood off to the side having their own private conversation.

"So did Ginny really come to your study to ask for a quill?" Hermione asked giggling, handing Lucius back his walking stick.

"She did in fact," he answered with a lopsided grin. "One of them also mentioned something about freshly worn men's pants but Draco shouted no before the young lady was able to complete her sentence."

Hermione grasped onto Lucius' vest, unable to reign in her laughter. The idea of Draco becoming on edge whenever Ginny's mates came around was hysterical, especially when she considered his perpetual cocky nature.

"All right love, we'll leave you and your guests to your devices," he continued, gesturing to Severus and Draco. "Enjoy your party."

Hermione smiled, leaning up to kiss Lucius before they walked out of the room.

"You know, I wonder how long that potion works," Tonks said, turning the little pink bottle over in her fingers. She then sat up straight, poking her chest out and wriggling in place. Fleur's blue eyes grew wide and Tonks merely winked at her.

"What do you think, eh? Give Remus a little something else to play with tonight."

Tabitha was working on a sliver of cake and nearly choked when she heard her comment. "Tonks, you are a nutter!" she screamed. "The lady at the shop said it lasts for three hours if you take half the bottle, six for the whole."

Tonks eyes were a shade of purple to match her hair, and they shone with enthusiasm. "All right, one more glass of wine and then I'll try it. Oi, Hermione! We never found those toys, perhaps you should ask your house-elf to get them."

"I suppose you're right," Hermione replied, her brow quirking as she remembered something. "Say Ginny, what was that game you were talking about before, you know with the courgette?"

"Oh!" the redhead shouted before breaking out into a fit of laughter. "It's a good thing Mum and McGonagall left...although if either would have been able to do this I would pitch myself out the window and into Lucius' garden. Anyway you take a courgette and a Muggle condom, and you slip it over the courgette using your mouth- no hands allowed."

Some of the girls looked blank until Ginny explained what a condom was, which they promptly laughed at afterwards.

"Ginny! Where in hell did you find-that's right, Willow's mum's computer," Hermione gasped, her face flushed.

"Oh pack it in, Hermione. It would have been a right crack up and you know it."

"Oi, damn look! That stuff really works!" Tonks shouted, causing everyone to look at her and her now oversized breasts that were threatening to burst through her jacket. "Hot damn, Remus is going to go arse over elbows trying to touch these babies!"

Hermione's party went on for another hour. A racy round of Consequences was played, after which Tabitha pulled out a pack of Truth Cards. That ensued another round of bawdy laughter, blushing faces and two more bottles of wine.

Once they all settled down, Hermione opened up gifts revealing and equal amount of things for the baby as well as herself. Only when she began yawning did everyone stand up, stating that it was to leave so that she could get some rest.

"I was thoroughly surprised by this all," she told Ginny, hugging her tightly. "But thank you, this was wonderful."

"Anything for my best mate," she replied, winking back at Hermione. "Although I couldn't have done it without Lucius' help; your wizard is amazing. And he managed to keep it a complete secret, which is more than I can say for my brothers or husband which is why I didn't tell them. Those gits can't hold water in an iron bucket!"

"You have a point," Hermione laughed, yawning again. "Let me all walk you down to the drawing room."

"You'll do no such thing," she heard Lucius say behind her. Turning around she found him standing next to her and Ginny. "You look completely knackered; go to my room and I'll meet you in bed. I'll see the ladies out."

Hermione wanted to protest but inwardly admitted that she was tired. "All right," she conceded, giving everyone else a hug and thanking them before leaving the room.

Taking a quick shower and not bothering to put on pajamas, Hermione slid back into Lucius' bed, her eyes crashing shut soon as her head hit the pillow. She stirred slightly when she felt the bed dip down next to her, a warm hand beneath the duvet and running across her torso.

"Did they wear you out?" Lucius asked, laughter rumbling in his chest.

"Yes," Hermione sleepily replied, snuggling closer to Lucius. "But I enjoyed myself. Ginny told me what you did-thank you, love."

"You're welcome," he told Hermione, burying his face in her curls. "Now no more chatting, you need to sleep."

"All right," she sighed breathily, burrowing further into Lucius' body heat.

He'd curved his body around hers, slipping one arm beneath his pillow when he froze, coming in contact with something hard. Furrowing up his brow, he withdrew the object and was face to face with a blue, plastic penis.

"Should I even ask why this is in our bed?" he asked, holding the box in front of Hermione's face.

Her brown eyes fluttered open and she burst into peals of laughter, between gasps explaining that it was one of the items for their Naughty Treasure Hunt.

"I thought perhaps you were trying to delicately send a hint in my direction," Lucius drawled, setting the box down on his nightstand.

"You have more than enough in your trousers," Hermione reassured him. "I guess I should warn you, there's a purple one just like that lurking about somewhere. I got distracted and forgot to ask Tipsy where she hid them."

"Let's just hope she didn't hide it in Draco's room," he grumbled, slipping his arms around Hermione as she laughed into the pillow before dropping off to sleep.
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Accidental Blood Bond