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The Long Road	By : SinisterMe Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Snape/Remus Views: 63598 -:- Recommendations : 3 -:- Currently Reading : 18
Disclaimer: This is a work of fan fiction using characters from the Harry Potter world, which is trademarked by J. K. Rowling. This story is purely for entertainment purposes, no money is being made from it.

Chapter List
- 15
- 16
- 17
Severus set Lupin by the armchair and table near the fireplace. He then spelled a small fire burning in the grate, its warmth and glow spreading through the room. Remus sat quietly, eyes locked onto his knees, arms wrapped around his middle loosely.
“Will you be comfortable in that chair for a moment?” Severus asked.
“Yes, sir,” Remus said, not looking up.
“In that case, I will be right back.”
Snape headed down to the kitchen, finding the teapot and two teacups. He filled up the pot with water, setting it and the cups on a tray and charming the water so steam was coming out the spout. He went into one of the cupboards, finding the glass jar labeled ‘fennel’ and some empty teabags. He filled the bags with the fennel that Fred must have prepared, also adding a little dried ginger to the mix. Severus closed up the teabags and dropped them in the pot, setting the lid in place.
He took the tray in hand and returned to his room. Remus looked up as he entered, anxiety written across his face. His expression changed when he saw the tray, but Snape still didn’t know exactly what to make of it.
Severus balanced the tray on one hand, moving the texts and parchment on the small table between the chairs to an out of the way place on the floor nearby. He then placed the tray on the table, sitting in the chair on the opposite side of it. He poured two cups of the hot liquid, passing one carefully into Remus’ good hand.
Though it was more than likely too hot, Remus brought the cup to his lips, taking a cautious sip. His face brightened. “I love fennel tea,” he said without even thinking.
Severus picked up his own cup. “I remember,” he said.
Remus gave him a confused look. “Did we discuss it at some point, sir?”
“I don’t believe so; I sat near you for a year at the head table.”
“You paid attention to my tea?” Remus asked.
Severus shrugged. “Small details were everything to me back then; it’s something that is very difficult to turn on and off.”
“Well, regardless – thank you, sir.”
“I thought a cup of tea might settle both our nerves,” Severus admitted, lifting his own cup to his lips.
Remus smiled weakly at him, the look withering on his face almost before it appeared.
It seemed Lupin wasn’t going to make thing easy for him; and why should he? Severus set his cup back on the table, standing and moving a few paces away. He removed his outer robe, taking the potions out of his pocket and hanging it neatly in his closet. He moved to take his seat again, placing the bottles on the table between them and unbuttoning his cuffs. He took his cup back in hand and looked blandly at Remus.
“Thank you for applying that salve for Teddy,” Remus said suddenly. “As well as for being so compassionate about it.”
Severus shifted uncomfortably. “I don’t see any reason for him to be in discomfort over something that happened so long ago.”
Remus tilted his head slightly as if trying to see Severus from a different angle. “I am coming to understand that, sir.” Remus paused so he could choose his words carefully. “But you speak to him like he’s a real person; you answer his questions.” Lupin sounded like he was trying to figure it all out.
Severus sipped his tea. “He is a real person, Lupin.”
“I know that! I just didn’t think you would, sir.” Remus looked uneasy as soon as he said it.
“Fair enough,” Severus said. “I have occasionally been vocally unsupportive of the werewolf community as a whole.” He knew he shouldn’t be trying to rile Lupin up, but Merlin, it was just too easy!
“Just vocally unsupportive, sir?” Remus asked in disbelief.
“Well, despite anything I may have said I did devote a large percentage of my research to lycanthrope safe potions, the Wolfsbane aside.” Severus wasn’t trying to be cocky, these were just facts.
“I’m sure you’d just love to find a cure, and then you’d be rid of the whole lot of us.” Remus sounded rather cross.
Severus gave an exhale of laughter. “Who do you think it would benefit more if I would find a cure, me or the entire lycanthrope population? Honestly, Lupin.”
“Sorry, sir. I’m just nervous; I guess I’m trying to pick a fight,” Remus admitted guiltily.
“Why would you do that?” Severus drawled.
“I just hate the anticipation of what you’re going to do to me, sir,” Remus said softly. “If I make you angry, we can just get this all over with.”
Snape looked vacantly at Remus for a moment. “What do you think is going to happen tonight?”
“I don’t know, sir. You said we were going to prepare for the ceremony. I can only imagine what it is you think we need to practice.” Remus’ voice was expressionless, his eyes locked onto his knees. When Snape didn’t respond immediately, he drank the rest of his tea in one gulp and waited.
Severus picked up the teapot, extending the spout in Lupin’s direction. Remus held out his cup with an unsure look; Snape merely refilled it, pouring another cup for himself in the process.
Severus decided to change the topic. “Your son seems to be progressing at an impressive speed; he seems to be quite the adaptable little fellow.”
“I couldn’t believe it when he showed me he could fold those paper flying machines all by himself. He was so insistent on making that one special for you; he seemed to know you would like it, sir.”
Severus looked over to the mantle where it sat and Remus followed his gaze. “He is a very thoughtful child,” Snape admitted.
Remus took a sip of his tea. “I’d like to think so, sir.”
They sat in silence for a while, drinking tea and taking in the crackling fire.
“I’d like to apply that topical salve to your burns for a second time; at the rate they’re healing it couldn’t hurt. After that I’ll give you your potions.” Snape took Remus’ cup from his hands and set it back on the tray.
“Yes, sir,” Remus said bleakly.
Severus stood and retrieved a fresh swath of bandages from a drawer across the room, returning to stand by Remus’ side. He set the roll of gauze on the table beside the tray after sterilizing the spot it would rest on, taking the jar of healing salve in hand.
Snape knelt on the floor in front of a seated Remus, pulling the legs of his cotton pajama bottoms up to rest at his knees. He rolled up his own shirt sleeves, cleansing his hands before starting the process of unwrapping Remus’ feet.
“Sir, please; you don’t have to-” Remus exclaimed.
“Your feet need to be seen to, Lupin,” Severus explained.
“I know that, sir and thank you for doing it,” Remus’ words came out in a rush. “But stand up, sir; you shouldn’t kneel for me, not for any reason. Please, I’ll lie down, sir.”
Severus continued unravelling the bandaged from around the bridge of Remus’ right foot. “Let me do this, Lupin.”
Remus bit his lip and looked away.
Snape ran his salve covered hands across one then the other of Remus’ feet. He took care to get every inch of damaged tissue using the same careful pressure across every part. His joints protested slightly at the position he was enforcing on them, but he paid it no mind. He had knelt before lesser men for worse reasons.
Snape took the bandages from the table, wrapping the exposed skin safely away, pulling Remus’ pant legs down one by one, straightening their ends. Again, there had been little progress for the one foot; he decided not to say anything about it. He pushed himself up, using the chair for assistance.
“I’m going to lay you down on the bed for the rest of this; it will be easier that way.”
“Of course, sir.”
Severus levitated the chair so it was near the side of the bed he didn’t usually habituate, setting it down and pulling back the crisply folded sheets and blankets so they were at the very foot of the bed. Then he cast the levitation charm again, moving Remus so he was hovering just above the mattress, facing upwards. He brought the salve, the potions and the bandages over to the nightstand. It took longer to clear Remus’ torso of wrappings, but the skin underneath looked even more improved than it had earlier in the day.
He spread the cream heavily across Remus’ chest, rubbing the potion across his skin in gentle circles. Remus’ eyes were closed, as always, but there was a small quirk to his lips that interested Severus.
He brought his fingers closer together, tightening his palm to Lupin’s abdomen, slowing his motions slightly, paying close attention to the muscles tightening and loosening under his fingers. Some part of Remus loved to be touched like this, Severus could tell. One look at his face, however, would tell a different story; his eyes were tightly shut and there was a crease in his brow.
He uttered the words to the charm that would slowly turn Remus over so he could reach his back. With more potions on his hands he began smoothing the cream over Remus’ shoulders and back, fingers trailing along his spine carefully; he was in no hurry.
Severus noted that Remus was breathing just a little heavier as his fingers graced unscarred skin. After spreading the salve thoroughly across the parts that needed healing, he took his potion covered fingers and placed his thumb and index finger on either side of Remus’ neck, massaging the tissue under his fingers persistently.
Remus couldn’t stop himself; he made a small sound in the back of his throat when Snape’s fingers worked their way into the knots on his neck. He had to remember to stay silent, one of these times he was really going to earn himself something to make noise about, and it wouldn’t be any damn massage.
Severus took the bandages, expertly wrapping all of the places that needed protection. He turned Remus over again and slowly lowered him to the bed. He cleansed his hands, using his now clean fingers to undo the top two buttons of his shirt collar.
Before walking around to his side of the bed, he pulled the covers over Remus, loosening the ones at the foot of the bed so Lupin’s bandaged feet would have unrestricted room to move. He cast the evacuation charm so the man wouldn’t feel the need to use the loo in the middle of the night.
“Thank you, sir,” Remus said.
“You’re welcome,” Severus replied, uncorking the fast paced healing potion and handing to Remus.
Lupin took his dose without question, handing the bottle back to Snape, who set it aside.
Severus walked around the bed, turning his back on Remus and pulling his shirt free of his pants, unbuttoning it and sliding it off his shoulders. He knew Remus would be feeling vulnerable, laying there in his bed, in no condition to defend himself even if he felt he was able. To Snape it seemed only fair that they would both be out of their comfort zones; he had planned on going to the loo to get changed.
He took his time, folding the shirt carefully in half before depositing it in the hamper.
Remus lay in bed where Severus had carefully placed him. He watched the other man undress in what began to be abject horror. Severus had taken his shirt off, and put it in the laundry when Lupin caught sight of his back. Remus actually had to bite down hard on his bottom lip to keep from making a surprised sound.
The skin on Snape’s back looked like it had been completely flayed off at one point, scars trailing around his sides and down past the band of his trousers. They were obviously old, totally healed. Remus was taken aback by the sheer number of them, wondering how one person had managed to accumulate so many permanent marks in a single life that was, by wizarding standards ag least, so far rather short.
Severus continued, unbuttoning and removing his trousers, letting them slide to the floor before picking them up, folding them as well and placing them in the laundry on top of his shirt. He stood there for a moment in underwear that was not at all greying and took his sleeping attire from where it was neatly folded on his pillow, shaking the pants out and stepping into them one leg at a time, pulling them up and synching the waist.
In that brief moment, Remus saw that the scarring was not limited to Snape’s back. It extended down his thighs, trailing further down to where Lupin’s view was obscured by the bed.
Severus turned around, meeting Lupin’s eyes immediately.
Remus looked down, ashamed for being caught assessing the other man’s scars.
Snape didn’t say a word about it. He pulled back the covers on his own side of the bed, sitting on the edge and sliding slowly in between the sheets and pulling the blankets up over himself as well. He rolled on his side so that he was facing Remus, but moved no closer than that.
“Dare I ask how you’re feeling?” Severus asked.
“Honestly? Terrified, master,” Remus answered. He hated how quickly this potion kicked in; he felt its effects almost before Severus had sat on the side of the bed.
“Remember, there is no need for you to use that title.”
Remus blanched. “Forgive me, sir.”
“I’m not angry about it,” Snape said simply. “I’m only reminding you, I know that potion makes it difficult for you to think.”
“Yes, it does; thank you for understanding, sir.”
Snape could feel Lupin shivering beside him. Every muscle in the other man’s body was taut, like he was ready to flee at any moment, healing feet or no.
“Remus,” he said softly. “You understand that I am still taking that potion, right?”
Lupin’s head spun to the side so he could look at him better. “Pardon me, sir?”
“When I said we would be preparing for the ceremony, I did not mean that we would be practicing the acts of the ceremony itself.” Snape cursed himself for being so bloody vague all of the time; it was an old habit.
A perplexed look flashed across Remus’ face. “What did you mean then, sir?” he asked carefully.
“I had intended for us to become more comfortable with the close proximity the spell will require.”
“I don’t see how we’re going to do that if you’re still taking that potion, sir.”
Snape sighed. “Slowly, Remus,” he said. “We are going to do it slowly.”
“If you say so, sir.” Maybe it was the potion, but he still wasn’t sure what his master was talking about. Severus would show him, though, of that he was confident somehow.
“I do; are you comfortable?”
“Yes, sir.” Remus had been surprised to find Snape’s sheets and mattress to be of the same make and quality of his own. Despite the close proximity of the other man he was quite contented in the bed.
“Good,” Snape said, adjusting his pillow.
“Sir?”
“Yes?”
“That means we’re not going to – you’re not going to –” Remus was tripping over his tongue. He had to know, but he couldn’t say it.
“No Remus, we’re not; not tonight.”
Relief was evident on Lupin’s face; it was a mere second before the look twisted. “Is it because you’re disgusted with me, sir?”
“No,” Severus placed his hand lightly on Lupin’s un-bandaged arm, his skin jumped under his hand. “I am not disgusted with you.” He could see the thankfulness Lupin felt at hearing they weren’t going to have sex that night, but at the same time, the idea of Severus finding him undesirable seemed to upset him as well. “Why does it matter so much to you?” Severus had to ask.
“People are much harder on things they don’t like; on things they see no value in, wouldn’t you agree, sir?”
“I would agree that some people are,” Severus was waiting for him to get to the point.
“Well, I already know that you don’t like me,” Remus cleared his throat. “That you hate me, sir. Years of interactions between us have told me that. But-” he choked a little. “If you could find me agreeable in just one way, even if it was only for the use of my body-” Lupin’s breathing was speeding up again; this time it definitely wasn’t because he was enjoying himself.
Severus thought he may be hyperventilating. “Remus,” he tried to calm the other man.
“There are only so many parts to the ceremony, sir.” Lupin’s eyes were clenched shut. “If you’re not looking to use my body for pleasure, you must be looking to use it for pain. Please tell me sir, I can’t handle the anticipation-”
“Remus,” Severus said more sharply.
Lupin looked over at him again, a wild expression on his face.
“Do you want me to show you what I had planned for the evening?”
“Please, sir,” Remus begged. “It almost doesn’t matter what it is so long as I know.”
Severus moved closer to him; their legs were touching.
Remus was tightening up more than Snape thought possible for a person; if the wolf didn’t watch it he was going to pull something.
“You realize there was more to the bonding than the simple steps Macnair took, don’t you?”
“No, sir; other that the hints you’ve given me, I had no idea.” The prospect of there being more than expected in the ritual understandably unnerved Remus.
Snape extended one arm under the pillow Remus’ head was laying on, his other arm snuck over Lupin’s torso. In the end he was as close to the other man as he could get.
Remus was holding his breath; Snape’s body was pressing against his, the other man’s arms were enfolding him carefully. When Severus stopped moving he let out a cautious sigh.
“I think it would be good for us- for the bond- if we became more accustomed to one another,” Severus explained, his voice a soft exhale against Remus’ shoulder. “I mean without the necessity for anything else, or anything more. I saw only one fraction of what you experienced with Macnair; even with just that, I understand that you need time; I only regret that there is not more of it to give to you.”
Severus voice was velvet; if he wasn’t being sincere, he was doing a damn good job of faking it. Remus felt his throat getting tight; why would Severus Snape, of all people, care if he needed time or not? He felt warmth emanating from the other man’s body, arms wrapped around him. He tried to think about the last time someone had had this level of patience with him, finding only endless memories of Walden’s cruelties. He began to shiver again.
“Why do you care, sir?”
Snape set his palm lightly on Remus’ chest. “I care because you belong to me, remember? Even if you didn’t; most of the people I have known well in my life are either dead or lying as empty husks in a Ministry basement somewhere,” Snape chuckled humorlessly. “You may well be all I have left.”
Remus gave a huff of laughter, but otherwise stayed silent; the potion was swirling and disorganizing anything he would have said in response to that. He found himself biting his bottom lip to keep from speaking, so afraid was he of the things that may spill from his lips.
“Either way, you have nothing to fear from me tonight; except that I snore.” Severus waited a moment; not so much as a snicker was forthcoming. “Come on, that was an easy shot.”
“An easy shot, sir?” Remus sounded puzzled.
“My nose is three quarters of my face; you’re not even going to roll your eyes at that?”
Remus looked horrified. “I would never joke about your face, sir.”
Snape raised an eyebrow. “Never, he says.”
“I knew this would happen. You have to understand that I had no real power over them, sir. I always thought you were- I never made fun of the way you looked, not even when the four of us were in our dorm room alone.”
In hindsight, Severus saw that this was the only path that conversation could have gone down. He’d almost expected it to lighten the mood. Now that it had come up, he had to know.
“Why didn’t you stop them, even after you were made prefect?” He surprised himself with the lack of spite in his own voice.
“They were my friends, sir. All three of them knew what I was; even though I’d done my best to hide it from them. If I’d sided with you, I mean really sided with you, they would have hated me just as much; I was afraid they would tell everyone that I was a monster and then they’d kick me out of school. I’m sorry I was always such a coward, sir; I’ve always been sorry. You never deserved any of that.”
Severus supposed it wasn’t really fair to be asking Remus questions with that potion coursing through his system. He took a deep breath.
“I’m sorry I brought it up, Remus,” Severus said. Since that time he had faced worse tortures and humiliations than anything the Marauders had put him through. Though if Sirius Black was here right now he would still curse the bastard into oblivion. Snape figured that was completely unnecessary now, as Black had basically done that all by himself in the end, falling behind that curtain like a great buffoon.
“Why are you calling me, ‘Remus’?” Lupin asked, unable to hold the question back.
“Because; that way I find it easier to differentiate the you that is present right now from that silly fifteen year old boy that used to be my enemy. When we are being… intimate, that distinction is imperative.” He knew what he was capable of.
“Used to be, sir?” Remus asked, feeling like he was pushing the envelope with all of this talk of the past.
“Yes; I feel no such animosity towards you now, or I would never have trusted myself to take the two of you in.” His thumb was traveling back and forth across the length of Remus’ collarbone absently. He was trying to be honest, but it went against years of practice and ritual.
“I believe you, sir,” Remus’ eyes closed, the slow back and forth of Severus’ touch was almost hypnotic. Maybe it was the potion, but he was feeling hypersensitive.
“Good,” Severus said softly. “I hope you don’t mind.”
“Mind what?” Remus asked dumbly, his focus was on the nearness of the other man, his tender touches and the gusty exhales of his speech.
“That I call you Remus; it was a liberty never taken before. If it were a liberty that was ever even offered.”
“Oh yes, sir.” Remus was feeling almost delirious with the repeated use of his name. “Please, call me Remus.” The sensation of Severus’ hand moving calmly back and forth across his skin certainly wasn’t helping anything.
“Alright then, I will. Don’t forget I’ve extended the invitation to you as well.” Severus thought it was worth mentioning.
“I don’t know if I can do that yet, sir,” Lupin sounded rather sorry about it.
“That’s fine,” Severus said. “There is time.”
Remus shifted restlessly; Snape lifted his arm, giving him free range of movement. Lupin slowly turned onto his side, so that his back was facing Severus. He was panting with the exertion by the time he was finished, sagging against the mattress, against Severus.
Snape allowed his arm to settle, this time around the other man’s middle.
“Feels nice to not have to lie on your back, doesn’t it?” Severus asked.
“Yes sir, it does.” It took away some of the ache in his lower back. “I wouldn’t have been able to do this a couple of days ago.” Remus wasn’t sure if that last statement was about him being able to lie on his side or him being able to be this close to another human being who wasn’t his son.
“In a few of days we will be able to completely remove the bandages on your upper body,” Severus said.
“But not the ones on my feet,” Remus said.
“Not yet, no. Those will take more time; I’m still hoping they will be healed before the full moon. We will work something out, Remus,” Severus said.
Lupin shifted again, his calf curling back, brushing against Snape’s leg and staying there. “I don’t remember you being this optimistic when I knew you before, sir,” he said with a smile.
“Perhaps not; it should give you some confidence then.”
“I suppose it should.”
Remus seemed to be more relaxed than before; maybe their conversation was setting him at ease? For two people who weren’t all that comfortable with touch, they seemed to be doing just fine. Severus found himself actually enjoying the other man’s closeness; although a part of him sneered at that. In all honesty, this was nothing more than a prelude to rape.
Gooseflesh broke out on his shoulders and arms at the thought. It was true, no matter how he sliced it or went about it. Just another terrible act in a long line of terrible acts, all in order to try and reach one kind of manageable end or another. If he hadn’t accepted this sham of an inheritance, who knew whose bed Remus would be in right now; what dubious pleasures they would be exacting from his mending body?
Sure, Severus; keep on justifying everything to yourself. His forehead dropped until it rested on Lupin’s shoulder, tightening his arm around the lycanthrope’s waist; as if by holding the man more closely he could protect him from the things he would have to do. He felt Remus slide closer to him; their bodies formed one long line against each other.
“This is seriously what you’d intended for the evening?” Remus asked. “Not that I’m complaining, master,” he assured hastily.
“This is it,” Severus said sarcastically. “Not what you were expecting?”
“Not at all, sir. Not that I should continue to expect anything from you; you keep on surprising me.”
Severus’ hand ran up Lupin’s chest again, his fingers curling through the silver hair he found above the bandages; he almost couldn’t stop himself. “Good,” he said.
“Yes sir,” Remus said breathily.
“Hmm?” Severus wasn’t sure what he was talking about.
“Yes sir; it feels good.”
That wasn’t quite what he had meant. Severus continued his tenuous exploration of Remus body. The other man was leaning back, laying some of his weight on Severus, who found that to be rather pleasant. He was thankful for the potion in his system; there could be no question that without it, he would be hard as a rock and unable to hide it from Lupin. As it was, there was nothing to conceal and all he had to deal with was a persistent ache in his balls.
Severus buried any guilt he may be feeling, allowing his hands to roam across Remus’ torso, careful to keep his touches above the belt. Tonight was not about anything supremely physical, it was merely to be a foundation for them to build on. He wanted Remus to trust him, almost as much as he wanted to be worthy of that trust.
“Master?” Remus said, breath quickening.
Severus stopped his feather light explorations, leaving his hands to sit still against Remus’ body.
“Yes, Remus?” he asked; almost positive he heard the other man moan when he said his name. He ignored the use of the title master, knowing that Remus reverted to using it when he was under the influence of the potion. He’d already mentioned it once.
“What is the point of all this if you’re not going to have me, sir?” Remus voice was timid.
“I do have you,” Severus said close to Remus’ ear. “Here, in my bed, in my arms. That is the point. The bond will require a level of casual closeness, and more. We will work through it together, all of it.”
“I thought that after the other night in the bath,” Remus gulped. “You would want to use me for your enjoyment, master.”
Severus didn’t answer immediately, just placed his palms flat on Remus’ chest, holding his body near. “The bond requires more than our physical joining. Macnair royally botched it, if you ask me. He glazed over parts that would severely have affected the formation of the bond. We will speak of those in more detail when you haven't just taken that potion. Why do you think I did that for you, the other night in the bath?”
“I don’t know, master,” Remus sounded quite frustrated about it. it had puzzled him ever since; Severus had allowed him to reach completion and had demanded nothing in return.
“Perhaps because I saw what you expected of me, and I wanted to give you cause to feel something else in its place?” Severus tried to remind himself that Remus likely wouldn’t remember much of their conversation the next day.
“You actually wanted me to enjoy it, sir?” Remus was incredulous. He was startled to think that the bond may actually be more of a process than he had already endured, reluctant to think too closely on it.
“Yes, Remus; but was too early; I should not have done it then. It was not my intention to mislead you. I only wanted you to remember that your body can feel things other than pain.”
Remus waited a moment, pondering what Severus had just said. “You mean that if I behave correctly, you will be kind to me, sir?”
Severus fought the urge to pinch the bridge of his nose; Lupin sounded so damned hopeful. “No; that is not at all what I am saying. Remus; I will take no delight from hurting you. When the bond demands us to become physical together, I would like for you to take all the pleasure you can from our encounters.”
“I will do my best, master,” Remus said in a concerned voice.
One side of Severus mouth lifted in a half-smile. “So will I.” The idea of coaxing more of those little sounds out of Lupin did hold quite an appeal. “For now, we should sleep, don’t you think? Tomorrow I’m going to begin your Wolfsbane.”
“Thank you, sir, for taking the time to make it,” Remus said. He felt Severus shrug.
“It is better than any alternative I can think of.” Severus’ eyes drifted shut. “Do you think I should wake Teddy up to use the loo?” he asked suddenly.
Remus was unused to having his opinion asked. “He’s settling in okay; maybe see if he makes it through the night. If you don’t mind the possibility of him having an accident, that is.”
“Okay then.” Severus relaxed again. “He knows to come get me if he has any troubles. It won’t make you uncomfortable for him to see us like this if he needs anything?”
“No, sir. After everything he’s seen in his life, I don’t think the sight of us sleeping in the same space will bother him.”
A very disturbing thought occurred to Severus. “Macnair didn’t make him watch the two of you…”
“No, not that, thank Merlin. He did make Teddy watch when he disciplined me, sometimes. I think it was supposed to remind him to behave; but that man’s motivations were often unclear to me, sir.” Remus gave a watery sigh.
“Your son is safe now; warm and asleep across the hall. You are healing at an incredible rate and are being freely given time to rest. Macnair is dead; cold and in the ground. You and your son have won.”
“Sorry to say sir, but it feels like a hollow victory,” Remus said sorrowfully.
“It will, for a while. The main thing you have now is time; to heal and become well. I’ve known you for years, Remus. You are stronger than this.” Severus was staggered by his own words of encouragement; he really wasn’t a positive person and reassurances had never come easy to him.
Remus suppressed a sob. “Thank you, master; you can’t imagine how wonderful it is to hear you say that.”
Severus said nothing, soothing his thumb across Remus’ skin; he could understand how tonight would be emotionally charged for the other man. Snape was surprised to find that he didn’t need to work very hard to dredge up the patience needed to deal with Remus when he was in this state. No one had allowed him to heal when he was a similar bubbling mess of emotions; they’d only pulled his strings harder. In a way, it was like he was taking care of himself as well as Remus, giving himself those assurances to stand on. In a way.
His exhaustion was starting to get the better of him; Severus allowed his eyes to close. He had anticipated some level of tension tonight, so he had placed his wand on the far side of his nightstand, just out of easy reach. That way if he woke with a start he would have a moment to think before doing something he might regret.
“Goodnight, Remus,” Severus said.
“Goodnight, sir,” Remus replied.
Snape waited a while to be sure that Remus was actually going to fall asleep. It took a while for him to drift off, his body becoming lax in sleep. He placed one small kiss on Lupin’s shoulder for solidarity’s sake and finally allowed himself to rest.
A/N: Hope you liked that. It took me quite a long time to get it to where I was (almost) happy with it. Hope it wasn't too cheesy or anything.
Drop me a note, a thought, anything! You guys have all been so great already, I love reading your comments! Please, let me know what you think!
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The Long Road