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Shame's Desire	By : dweek Category: Harry Potter AU/AR > Het - Male/Female Views: 32597 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 3
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 16
- 17
- 18
Ginny-
I haven’t actually spent much time walking out in the gardens of the Manor. They just feel too much like my predecessor's domain and I hardly have a green thumb or any desire to plant useless flowers in the earth. So when a very surprised head gardener explains where he had sent Dean to work today I get a little lost in the winding paths.
I agreed to speak with Dean about being respectful to Lucius if he wanted to keep his job, and I am a little worried that Dean will be blamed if I get lost and die on these paths as no one could ever find anything in this maze of a garden.
Just when I hit the point where real panic is starting to take seed I see someone kneeling in one of the many flower beds.
I smile because he looks so much like his father that I’m amazed at how much he seems to have grown up since I last saw him. It hasn’t been three months since I left my family home and Dean went ahead and grew into a man in that short time.
“Dean?” I ask making him stop and look back at me. His face is covered in sweat and his clothes in dirt. I feel jealous for a brief moment as I look down at my perfectly manicured appearance. I remember how I used to run through the woods with him in my bare feet and come home with sticks tangled in my hair.
“Gin?” He asks standing and brushing himself off and I can hear the relief in his voice.
“How long have you been working here?” I ask, as he looks me over as if he is expecting battle wounds. He seems to study every inch of me and I can’t really understand the look in his eyes as I wait for him to answer.
“What?” He asks suddenly blushing, as he must realize what he had been doing.
“How long have you worked here?” I ask again taking a step closer to him feeling suddenly very awkward.
“Two months…” he trails off as if he doesn’t quite know how to address me.
I fidget slightly feeling all the more awkward because he was acting odd. “Why didn’t someone tell me?” I ask trying to keep the conversation going.
“I didn’t tell them I knew you.” He admits as he looks everywhere but at me now. “I thought it might be better if no one knew our connection.” He adds nodding as he looks at his feet.
“What? Why would you think…” I stop and take a sudden step back from him. “Did my father ask you to come work here?” I ask suddenly as I realize why I got such a close inspection when he first saw me. “Are you spying on me?”
“N-not exactly my Lady.” He says glancing up for a moment before looking back at his shoes. The title seems odd coming from him, and I frown as he uses it.
“Your father just wanted you to have an ally here if you needed help.” He admits timidly looking up at me. “I didn’t expect for you to be so different.” He adds under his breath.
“I haven’t changed.” I snap crossing my arms in front of me.
“You have.” He says still speaking softly. “I almost wouldn’t know you Gin.” He motions to me. “It isn’t just the clothes either, you hold yourself differently. More like a lady.”
I frown as I look down at myself. I really didn’t think about how I stand and I have nothing to say to his accusation so I just glare at him.
“Honestly it agrees with you Gin.” He adds, as he knows he has upset me. “I never really thought of you as an actual Lady before now.”
“What are you working on?” I ask because I don’t want to talk about this any more and I have to think about what he’s said.
“Just making sure the flower beds are weeded and such.” He says dismissively. “We won’t really start working on things for the ball for a couple of weeks at least.”
Ball? I have no idea what he is talking about so I just glare at him for another moment. I don’t want to admit I have no idea about half the things that go on in a home that is supposed to be mine.
“I see.” I say shifting to another foot, as I know I need to mention what I actually came to talk to him about. “Well walk me out so I don’t get lost again.” I tell him motioning around at the maze of a garden.
“Again?” He asks smiling for the first time.
“This place is a maze.” I huff stomping my foot once.
“You haven’t been out much.” He says as he sets his tools down so he can come back to work after. “I thought I would be able to see you more.”
“It feels weird to be out here.” I tell him as we start to walk. “Lady Malfoy… I mean his first wife… I’m obviously Lady Malfoy now… The garden was sort of her thing.” I tell him in such an elegant way that he actually laughs. I smile glad he’s stopped acting weird.
“Well you know you could make it your thing. This is your home now.” He points out. “This garden has none of you in it. It’s so ordered.” He tells me sadly. “I could help you make it into something really beautiful.”
I smile at him because he knows none of this is to my taste and I think of what I would actually want to see in these gardens. “I don’t think Lord Malfoy would be interested in changing it now.” I tell him softly. “And I don’t want Draco to resent me any more than he already does.”
Dean frowns at this and looks at me oddly again.
“I mean I am Lady of the Manor for now, but Draco is the heir and his wife will have this place much longer than I ever will.”
“I see. So what do you do with your time?” He asks as he is now obviously trying to get a better picture of my life. I wonder if he will report back to my father.
I think about the way Lucius bent me over his desk and spanked me the day before and I try very hard to not let color come to my cheeks. “I spend a lot of time reading actually.” I tell him because it is true.
“You always liked books.” He says with a nod, as he had never understood my fascination. My mother had made sure all the children living near our estate learned to at least read, but not everyone was excited about the written word as me. Not even all my other siblings enjoyed our small collection back at the Burrow.
“Lucius has an amazing library.” I tell him with a smile.
He frowns at the mention of my husband and I stop our walk by placing my hand on his arm. “Dean you can’t talk to him like you did yesterday.” I tell him seriously, as I look up into his eyes. “Lucius is the Lord of this Manor and your boss. He wanted to dismiss you without reference, but I convinced him to give you a second chance.”
He looks at the hand I have resting on his arm for a long moment before nodding. “Just tell me he doesn’t hurt you.” He says instead of answering me. “If he hurts you Gin we can leave, I can take you away right now.”
I blush at this and take a step back from him as I think about all the wonderful ways Lucius hurts me. I don’t have the words to tell him what my relationship is so I shake my head instead. “No. He doesn’t hurt me.
“Oliver said he dragged you from the room yesterday like he was going to murder you.” Dean says obviously not convinced.
I remember meeting Oliver yesterday and I look away as I’m embarrassed that people are talking about me. “He obviously didn’t murder me.” I tell him with a sigh.
“There is talk among the servants Gin.” Dean keeps pressing. “They say Lord Malfoy is into some pretty sick stuff.” He tells me and I take a step back from him because he is getting more animated as he speaks. “There is a rumor that he is sharing you with his son. They say you are some kind of…” he trails off, as he obviously can’t bring himself to go into detail about what the servants have to say about me. “One of the maids swears she heard you screaming in pain.”
My face feels hot with humiliation as I think of all the rumors and gossip the human servants here have to say about me. One of the good things about elf servants is that they don’t speak in such ways about their masters.
“That is servant gossip and I hope you told these people saying these things that I am not that sort of person.” I say angry as I think about the very idea of Lucius letting Draco do anything to me.
“I have and they counter with how little of a choice you have with him.” Dean says still sounding worried.
“Dean Thomas I am not going to talk about my marital bed with you. The only thing I will say is that it includes only two people, as it should and the rest is no one’s business but my husband's and mine. Really not even that is anyone’s business and it is disgusting that anyone would talk about me like that.” I snap and I can’t even look at him now as I think about what he must think of me.
“If he’s hurting you Gin I can help.” Dean presses again.
“Stop.” I tell him finally looking up at him with a frown. “No one is hurting me Dean.” I say taking a breath because I want him to believe me. “I know everyone back at the Burrow is worried about me, but this is my home now, and I have found a bit of happiness here. I’m not being hurt so you should stop worrying about that. I know Lucius seems like a hard man, but he is actually quite sweet to me in his own way. And as your Lord, you need to treat him with the respect that title deserves. Do you understand what I am saying?” I ask as he just looks at me.
“Yes.” Is all he says for a long time.
When I start to walk away, he walks beside me. We spend a few more minutes in silence before he shows me toward the back terrace. I turn to make my way into the house when he puts his hand on my arm.
“I’ll do it for you Gin.” He says making me turn to face him. “Just know my loyalty is with you.”
“Thank you Dean.” I tell him as I lean in carefully to kiss his cheek before I head inside.
Lucius-
One of the elves alert me as soon as the two of them come out of the garden and I look out my study window to see him touching her arm. I can’t really see expressions from this distance but it is hard to miss when she leans in and kisses him. My hand goes to the wand at my side as I watch the boy head back into the garden as my wife heads towards the house.
I could follow the boy and kill him for even thinking he had any right to touch my wife. But before I can follow the impulse, I remind myself that I don’t know exactly what his story is. She said they had kissed before and I am the one who ordered her to go speak with him.
Before I know what I am doing, I make my way towards the back of the house to find her. By the time I get there, she is turning towards the south wing of the Manor. I assume the library. I look over her clothes to see if she looks as if she did more than kiss him, and I see a smudge of dirt on her sleeve where he had touched her.
She stops in her tracks when she sees me. She reminds me of a young dear freezing at the sight of a predator and I have a sudden urge to throw her against the wall and fuck her as if I need to claim her all over again.
“How did your little private conversation go?” I ask as I let venom fill my tone. I am in no mood to play any sort of games with her.
“You told me to speak to him.” She reminds me taking a step back. “And he has agreed to show you all due respect in the future.” She adds quickly before I can interrupt her.
“I didn’t tell you to let him touch you.” I remind her darkly as I slowly move towards her as she backs away from me. “I told you no male staff was allowed to touch you.” I add clutching my wand. “You are mine.” I can feel the blood pumping in my ears as images of them rolling around in the dirt come unbidden to my mind. I take a few swift steps towards her and in her rush to back away she trips on a rug and falls to the ground at my feet.
“I forgot.” She says and I notice she has her own wand out.
Leaning down over her, I narrow my eyes. “You forgot you belong to me?” I ask in a deadly soft whisper.
She shakes her head quickly. “I’m yours.” She agrees as she keeps shaking her head. “I forgot about the touching. I’m so used to…” She starts and I cut her off by trying to bind her hands. The little brat actually deflects my spell and I find myself struggling between being impressed and all the more angry.
“I could kill him you know.” I tell her darkly so she doesn’t get too comfortable. “He is a common half blood and I could murder him and no one in this empire would care.”
“M-my father would care.” She says moving away from me so she can get back to her feet.
“Is the boy your father’s spy then?” I ask amused as things make a bit more since now. “Does he think he can somehow steal you away?”
“No.” She says but I can see that she is lying to me. When I narrow my eyes at her, she looks away. “He is just worried about me.” She says shaking her head. “But I would never leave you.” She adds and looks at me with such innocent honestly that I find I can’t hold myself back any longer.
I have her pressed against the wall faster than I knew I could move. I take her lips in a bruising kiss as I claim them back from the gardener. I move a hand into her hair and I grasp it hard enough to be painful.
I could fuck her right here in this hall knowing that anyone could come along and see us, but I hold myself back only because of how easily her body submits to mine. I do need to mark her as mine though so my lips move to her neck and meet her pearl collar. I yank them off her neck, not caring about the symbol for the moment so I can taste her skin.
As I suck and bite at the sensitive skin there, she makes a soft keening sound. Her hands move to my shoulders and I hear her breathy voice. “I love you.” She says and I don’t thinks she is aware enough to know that little gem just passed her lips.
I stop as I try to process these words and their meaning. Pulling back, I look into her eyes. She is looking away from me now as she realizes what she let slip.
She licks her lips before speaking. “Aren’t I supposed to?” She asks but makes no question of if I should love her in return.
I look at her for a long time before I speak. “My last wife never did. I don’t even think she ever claimed to.” I don’t know why I am telling her that as I try to think if Narcissa ever said those words in that way during her life.
“I have a feeling I’m not as smart as your last wife.” Ginevra says as she looks down the hall instead of at me. “But I think I do even if you are evil.”
“Evil?” I ask with amusement at the quaint term.
“You just threatened to murder my childhood friend before practically mauling me in this hall.” She says licking her lips. “I think that counts.”
With my hand still in her mane of red hair, I force her to look at me. “I know your family doesn’t respect their own place in this world. They treat commoners as if they were equals or some nonsense. But that isn’t the way of the world and both you and that boy need to understand that you hold a higher place, a place out of his reach. Even if you weren’t mine, he should be beaten for touching a woman above his station.” I tell her because I am not going to argue with this evil nonsense.
“The fact that you are mine only makes his crime worse.” I add once I know she understands me. “What would you suggest as his punishment?”
“I touched him first. I gave him the wrong idea.” She admits looking at me with worried eyes.
I run my fingers over the marks I’ve already left on her slim neck as I think about her words and their merits. “You will never place yourself in a situation where you are alone with any male servant again. Do you understand?” I ask still petting her neck.
“I’ll bring Heety with me from now on.” She says quickly in response.
“I like that.” I agree running my finger down her neck and over the small mound of her breast that is showing over the cleavage of her gown. I’m not sure, if they are larger already or if it is just my imagination. I remember pregnancy had rounded out Narcissa’s small chest a bit. “But I still think it is best if I talk to the boy.”
“Don’t be mean.” She whimpers and I look up to see worry in her eyes. “I just convinced him you don’t hurt me.” She adds with a blush.
I smile at this and tighten my hold of her hair again so that I know I’m hurting her. She gasps and I can see the effect it has. “You don’t want him to know how much you beg me to?” I ask making her flush again. “You don’t want him to know how much of a pain slut you are? Or how bruised I left your arse yesterday?”
Her breath is shallow as she shakes her head. “No. Please don’t make that sort of trouble?” She has a begging tone in her voice.
“What will you do for me not to?” I ask as the hand not holding her hair plays with the cleavage of her gown.
She licks her lips as I see her mind working behind her eyes. I watch her try to look up and down the hall with her eyes as I keep her head positioned to my liking. “What would you like Master?” She asks softly.
I smile as she uses the name without me having to tell her. I let my fingers dip into her gown pulling it and the under-gown off her round breast. Her nipple is the peak of hardness and I can't help but pinch it until she gasps.
“Think about that for the rest of today.” I tell her before stepping back and leaving her exposed. “Tonight you will warm my bed. I have some new toys you can look forward to playing with.”
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Shame's Desire