Derailed | By : SickPuppy Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Harry/Snape Views: 19739 -:- Recommendations : 2 -:- Currently Reading : 3 |
Disclaimer: I do not own the Harry Potter universe. I make no money from this story. |
Chapter Nine: Runaway train, burning in my veins
Early morning. Pale spring light came filtering weakly through the grimly windows. Harry had just vanished the collar around his neck and was idly rubbing the skin, feeling bereft as he always did, and sick, again as he always did.
A knock at the door. Silence in the house apart from the shuffling of a young man, still licking blood from one arm. He pulled the long sleeve t-shirt down to hide the wound and stumbled down the stairs.
Having only just woken up, and recently climaxed, Harry was less than fully awake. Wearing boxers and the top he opened the door without stopping first to check who it was.
It was Snape.
“No! No! Nononononononononononononononono!” his voice started softly, but rose to a scream. “NO!” Harry backed away, terrified, stumbling to the floor and trembling all over. He lay on his back and stared up at Severus Snape and could think of nothing but what this man had done to him. But he also blushed, as his erection made his underwear bulge.
His visitor stared at him, unspeaking, unmoving.
“Go away!” Harry sobbed. Tears finally, for the first time since he had come home, started to fall, “Oh, go away! You did enough to me! Just stop it! You did this to me! You made me like this! Now leave me!”
He shook helplessly, hands clenching pointlessly into fists, making the scar along his left hand stand out, a silver line of hurt to match his slashed heart and soul. The wound on his arm began to spill red fluid but he ignored it all. “Go away!” he croaked, screwing his eyes shut tight. He was silently thinking that maybe if he just wished hard enough, Snape would just vanish. And did he want that or not?
Severus just stood on the threshold and waited. A silent figure all in black as usual. No concession made to the warm spring weather. No sound came from the older man, not even as he watched Harry slowly disintegrate before his eyes. His eyes burned with that passion that had made him claim Harry so thoroughly.
At last even Harry had to pull himself together. He swiped an arm across his nose, leaving a glistening trail of snot on one sleeve. He stayed on the floor, not trusting his legs to support him, hoping his arousal wasn't obvious, and looked up, eyelashes clumped together with tears. “What do you want?” he mouthed, utterly unable to speak; his throat had closed over as all his hatred, guilt, self-loathing, revulsion, and distress came back and dragged him down.
Finally, after aeons had passed, Severus spoke. “To explain.”
***
Voldemort screamed in mounting rage as he read the final details of Snape's betrayal. Snape, his faithful servant, had been the one to order the boy's rescue?! Snape, the man who been most enjoying the boy's body?! He screeched in fury as he learned more and more of the truth. After all this time, Severus Snape's affection had turned to the boy.
“I will kill him myself.”
***
“Explain?” Harry’s voice rose hysterically, his throat clearing, “Explain?! Explain what? Your obsession? Your torment of me? Your lies? Your freedom now?” He gulped, bottom lip trembling with frantic emotion.
“All of that. If you’ll let me.”
“Let you? When did you offer me a choice – a real choice when I was captured?” Harry felt suddenly so tired, so very tired. His anger just drained away as he looked at the slender figure haloed by the early morning sunlight. “Just … go away. Go away.”
“Just listen, that’s all I ask.” Snape stared intently at Harry. He saw, of course, the erection, and it made his own cock throb. “You heard everything at the trial, but I want you to hear it from me. I want you to know what a monster I am, despite being found not guilty.” His gaze dropped deliberately to Harry's cock. “You still want me, and that must be destroying you. Let me tell you everything so that you'll despise me, and then you'll be free.”
Harry clenched his jaw. “Okay,” he said at long last, “Come in. Explain. But don't expect me to forgive you.”
Snape took a step forward. Harry suddenly seemed to realise what he had said; his eyes widened and he scrambled onto shaky legs and backed away, keeping the same distance from his former teacher.
Harry backed onto the stairs. “Stay there,” he said, holding out one hand as if to ward off the other, although Severus had stopped at once, “that’s close enough.”
He settled onto a step and stared determinedly at the older man’s feet. He wanted to glance up, to meet those onyx eyes, but couldn’t.
It took Severus a few seconds before he could begin speaking. “I don't want to just repeat what I said at the trial, but I have been obsessed with you since you turned seventeen. I wanted your body, knowing you were a virgin, wanted to be the one who first claimed you, the one you'd never forget.” Snape stared intently at Harry, who made the error of looking up and seeing the passion still blazing in those dark eyes.
Harry's mouth was dry. He was remembering how forcefully Snape had laid his claim. “You enjoyed it.”
“Of course I did. A young, lithe body like yours? You hard and wanting my touch? Of course I did.”
Harry clutched his hair, fingers shaking as he was assaulted by memories of pain and pleasure achieved at the hands (and other body parts of this man). He wanted to flee his own chaotic thoughts – the thoughts that made him want to lead Snape to his bed and submit once again to him, knowing the joy to be had, the thoughts of feeling lost and out of control and needing something to grab onto.
He looked up into Snape's face, young and lost. “Help me,” he whispered. “Make all the pain go away,”
Severus stepped forward and folded the younger man in his arms. Harry tensed, but relaxed into the tight grip. Here he was safe.
END OF PART TWO
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