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Struggling Through New Beginnings	By : HarryGinny4eva Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female > Draco/Hermione Views: 31236 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: Spoilers - I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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Chapter 20

Hermione�s stare wasn�t lost on several others
though. Greg sighed heavily as he saw it. Ron huffed and sloshed water all over
himself when he did. And, Ginny tilted her head before
looking between the two a couple of times.

No one said a word until they were dismissed from class. But, the sound of
voices could once again be heard as soon as people got out of the room. Draco
had been one of the first out, with Greg and Blaise close behind. Hermione
packed her things more slowly and left to wait for her friends in the hall. She
looked up the stairs in time to catch the sun shining off of Draco�s hair as he
turned at the top step and disappeared.

She didn�t even realize she sighed until Ginny whispered in her ear, �Looked
good carrying those water buckets, didn�t he? All those quidditch muscles moving and shifting.�

Hermione nodded before she thought about it, and then turned
red as she faced her friend, �Ginny!�

�What?� Ginny asked innocently. Harry and Ron joined them just as she
said pointedly, �Just because I love Harry, doesn�t mean I can�t look and
appreciate, Hermione. Quidditch does a body good!�

Hermione smiled a little, but didn�t get a chance to answer because Harry
stepped forward and stood close to Ginny. �You still love me?�

Ginny glanced up at him and put her hand on his arm, �Of course, Harry. I told
you that last night.�

�I know,� he mumbled, �but all day you�ve��

�As much as I enjoy the angst of teenagers, with your love of publicity,
Potter, I am sure I will be able to read all about this in tomorrow�s Prophet. Now, I would like go enjoy my
lunch and have it stay down,� Snape spit out. �So, please remove yourselves
from my vicinity.�

Hermione was the first to turn and head up the stairs. When she reached the top
she turned to look back and noticed that Harry and Ginny were once again
holding hands. Behind them Ron smiled at her happily and behind him Professor
Snape scowled up at the group. Hermione turned back with a smile lighting her
face. For at least that moment, all seemed right in the world once again.

The feeling lasted until she neared the doors of the Great Hall and saw Pansy
waiting beside them. Her eyes met Hermione�s and the look of sorrow and fear on
Pansy�s face made Hermione stiffen. She wasn�t up to fighting with anyone. And,
she honestly couldn�t say she was upset with Pansy, so much as herself for
allowing the thoughts and feelings she�d been having to affect her so much.
With a sigh, she waved her friends into the hall and went to stand near the
steps. When Pansy didn�t move she waved her hand.

�Weren�t you waiting to talk to me?� Hermione asked.

Pansy nodded and walked slowly toward her, �Please don�t hate
me.�

�Oh, Pansy, I don�t hate you,� Hermione chided. �And, I�m not even
really all that angry with you anymore.�

�You�re not?� Pansy asked in surprise. �Why not?�

Hermione laughed and sat down on a step, �Do you want me to be?�

�What? No!� Pansy giggled a little as she joined Hermione on the step. �But, I
am confused. What happened in the last two hours?�

Hermione shook her head, �Two hours, two days, two months, I don�t know.�

When Pansy just looked at her in confusion Hermione sighed, �You see, the thing
is, I think I�m interested in him, too, heaven knows why. But, I don�t know if
it�s real, or if I�m just confusing sympathy with other things. He seems so
different, more approachable, and�I don�t know what to do.�

Pansy looked shocked for a moment before her face lit up in a huge smile. �But,
that�s great, Hermione! He likes you, too, so you can just��

When Pansy trailed off at a loss as to what Hermione should do, Hermione
laughed a little, �Exactly.� Then she sobered and looked out of the windows,
�We�ve been�at odds since the day we met. And, he was so hateful to me. Then, so much happened during the war, to me and to him; to me in
front of him, at least in part because of him. As much as my hormones
seem to be in charge right now, I can�t just forget all of that.�

Pansy said softly, �But, can you forgive it?�

Hermione looked at Pansy for a moment before she answered, �I already have, I
guess. I know the choices he made in the end. I know what he loss. I know he�s
changed. Vati told me this morning that I should keep in mind that we�ve all
grown up, even him.�

�You told Parvati you liked Draco?� Pansy asked in shock.

Hermione shook her head, �No, not in so many words. But she�s pretty smart when
it comes to relationships and stuff. Smarter than I am, that�s for sure. She
knew what was going on with me before I did.�

�Well, what do you want to do about it? What do you want to happen?�

When Hermione just shrugged, Pansy leaned closer and said, �Look, I am really
sorry for how I handled things this morning. But, I meant everything I said.
Now that I know you, at least a little, I do believe you two would be great
together. When he�s not being defensive, he�s actually a very nice and loyal
person. And, you�re both so smart, I know you�d have
loads to talk about. Maybe you could partner up with him in Muggle Studies or
something?�

�Well, as one of the few muggleborns in the school, I am excused from that
class,� Hermione laughed. Then she nervously added, �But, we did get paired in
Potions.�

Pansy stood and smiled at her, �Well, seems to me you will have plenty of
homework time together then. And, hey, you could still offer to help with his
Muggle Studies homework.�

Hermione stood as she laughed, �Yeah, right. Draco Malfoy
coming to me for help with his homework. That�ll be the day!�

Hermione felt a little better about her sudden crush after having said it out
loud. She had no clue what to do about it, but the
fact that she wasn�t denying it any longer seemed to lift a weight off of her.

�Thank you.�

Pansy looked at her as they approached the doors of the Great Hall, �For what?�

�For forcing me to face it. For letting me talk it
out.�

Pansy grinned and blushed. Then she said half in question, half in conviction,
�That�s what friends are for, right?�

Hermione heard the question behind the question and smiled at Pansy, �Exactly.�

The look of elation and relief on Pansy�s face made Hermione almost feel bad
for the dark-haired woman. Hermione might not have had a lot of friends during
her time at Hogwarts, but at least she had them and knew where she stood with
them. It saddened her that Pansy had never known the same. She reached out and
gave Pansy a quick hug and asked her to say hi to Ginny and Harry for her,
before heading toward her own table.

xxxxx

Blaise watched Hermione and Pansy part at the door,
and stared at her bouncy mass of curls as she strode toward their table. She
appeared to be lost in thought with a small smile playing around her lips until
she saw him staring at her and her steps faltered before she slowed to a stop.

It aggravated him that she straightened into a defiant stance before continuing
on her way. And, it didn�t make things any better when he saw the other
students shift and lower their heads when she reached the table. Their darting
glances between the two made him angry and he snapped.

�Just eat your damn lunch and stop worrying about the two of us!�

A sixth year Ravenclaw student lifted her face and arched a brow at him, �Maybe
that would be easier if you two weren�t always sniping at each other! The war�s finally over, why can�t you two let it go?! I�ve lost
my appetite!�

The rest of the table watched in silence as she pushed her plate back, stood
and left the hall. When he looked back at the rest of the table, the other
students sat with their food untouched, but with their bodies bent over their
plates. Blaise threw his fork on the table and sat back, but when a first year
on his right jumped and squealed in fear he saw the tears on her face and he
realized how much he really scared them.

He was angry and confused by all the changes around him, but it hadn�t been his
intention to scare small children. With a heavy sigh, Blaise turned to the
small girl.

�I�m sorry,� he whispered to her alone. �I didn�t mean to scare you.�

He saw a couple of others flinch when he reached out to put his hand on hers
and knew how much damage he�d done. He looked over at Hermione and saw she
still hadn�t sat down in her shock.

�Granger,� he bit out as pleasantly as he could, �why don�t you sit down.
You�re attracting attention.�

He almost laughed at the way her eyes widened, but she nodded and sat, as she
stared at him.

He took a breath and looked around the rest of the table. Only Granger looked
him in the eye. The rest of them still sat still as statues, much like
prisoners awaiting their fates. It made him feel very uncomfortable to know he
had put that fear there. But, he reasoned, it wasn�t entirely his fault.
Hermione had played a huge part in all of it.

She was�herself! As he continued to stare at her, and she at him, he listed in
his head the many faults he thought she had. She was a Gryffindor. She and her
friends, well people like them, were the reason for all his losses. She was too
nice; she didn�t even have the decency to be smug about her side winning. And,
she was the object of both Greg and Draco�s obsessions, which he felt was
somehow her fault, too. When he thought about it, it sounded trivial, even to
his own mind and he sighed heavily.

He had spent the last few hours with people who seemed to embrace all that he
rejected, even his own friends. He didn�t like the fact that they made him
think about things he�d rather not, rather than simply agreeing with him. Then,
when he�d assumed things couldn�t get worse, he�d been paired with his fellow
head in Potions. He�d spent the rest of the class hearing her mutter under
breath about immature gits, and life being unfair.

He was at a loss. Why was everything on him? Why was he the bad guy? Even Snape
had told him to grow up. Looking at the table of youngsters he thought maybe,
in certain ways, it was time he started to do so.

With a nod of decision he said to the table at large, �Look, I�m sorry you�ve
all felt the tension between Granger and me. But, we�re, uh, working on getting
past our issues. So, you lot can relax and eat. We won�t be fighting at the
table anymore, okay?�

No one moved or spoke for a minute, as they stared from one to the other. They
noted that Hermione looked as confused as they felt. Then a first year
Slytherin looked haughtily at Blaise and sneered.

�Are you going to stop calling her the M word?� he asked bravely. ��Cause I am
one, too, and I don�t really appreciate it from the Head Boy and a member of my
own house.�

Blaise was shocked into a silence; a mudbl�muggleborn Slytherin?! What was the world coming to?

�Well?� the child prompted.

Before he could answer, a fourth year Gryffindor turned to Hermione, �And, are
you going to stop goading him? You know he�s touchy, but you always seem to
take a perverse pleasure in pissing him off!�

Hermione�s jaw dropped at the reprimand.

But, she didn�t get to answer because another voice chimed in, �Yeah, and you
should both know better and be more mature than to squabble like children all
the time. You act younger than me!�

�Not a very good example to set for young people, I must say.�

�I thought seventh years were supposed to act like adults and stuff!�

�My mother told me that being a Head was a good thing. It meant people looked
up to you and could trust you. She said I should want to be one some day. I
don�t think so, now.�

�I just can�t take all this fighting every time I eat; it�s making my stomach
cramp. So, you two will have to learn to get along, just like everyone else.�

�Or, better yet, just don�t talk to one another, how�s that?!�

�Yeah, exactly! Why should we all suffer for the next month
because you two are too stubborn to at least try and act your ages?!�

That statement was followed by an extremely loud silence. Only then did they
all realize that others had stopped eating to watch their table. Hermione�s
face flushed and she lowered her head in shame. Blaise raised his chin
defiantly instead.

Hermione�s voice whispered across the table, �I apologize to all of you. You
are right. We were acting very childishly. It won�t continue on my part.�

All eyes swung to him and Blaise nodded, �Same here.�

His answer, though brief and still borderline rude, seemed enough and sounds
resumed around them. The rest of their table began to talk softly amongst themselves and their forks started clinking against their
plates. The fact that neither he nor Hermione said another word didn�t seem to
worry them, as long as they weren�t fighting. The other tables started eating
again, and he knew most of the conversations centered around
the events that had occurred at their table. He knew Hermione felt the looks
and heard the whispers, too, but he almost admired the way she refused to leave
in shame.

He watched as she seemed to come to a decision, straighten in her chair, and
reach into her bag. He knew before he saw it that she would remove a book and
read; blocking them all out. She seemed to do that a lot. He also noted that
her hands shook a little and she never touched her sandwich.

xxxxx

�Well, that was certainly entertaining,� Theo
grinned. �Both of them getting reprimanded by first and
second years. I never would have believed it.�

Harry chuckled softly beside him and then sobered, �Yeah. But, I hope she at
least eats something. She tends to get in her head about stuff like this. And,
then she starts blaming herself for everything. She�ll starve herself. Hermione
tends to take on more than she should as her fault, then she gets overzealous
in her need to fix everything.�

�Sounds like someone else I know,� Theo mumbled.

But, Harry heard him, �Who?�

Theo wondered how much he should say, but figured their new relationship
couldn�t be hurt too badly by the truth. He turned to look at Harry and said
evenly, �You.�

Harry looked at Theo for a moment before he asked, �Me? How
do you mean?�

�Well, Harry, take this Ginny thing for example��

�Stay out of it, Nott! You don�t know anything about it.�

Theo nodded, but continued anyway, �You are right, I don�t know you, her, or
your relationship all that well, but I do know people, Harry.�

�And, what is you think you know?� Harry asked acidly.

Theo took a steadying breath as he looked away from Harry and spoke softly, �I
know you two love one another; are�right for one another. From what I have
heard, I know she needs time to figure out who she is outside of being your
girlfriend and the Weas�ahem, Ron�s sister. I know
she must have a lot on her mind what with being Head Girl, plus N.E.W.T.S and
all. And, I know anyone would need time and space to get it all straight. I
also know that you need to give her both, or risk losing her. Last, I know you
have a need to fix things, even more so than you say Hermione does. But, Harry,
you have to try to NOT fix this. You have to let her be. Be there for her when
she needs you to be, but give her the time and space she needs, also. Maybe if
you don�t try so hard to fix everything, it will all fall into place as it
should, and you two will be stronger than ever. Besides, I think you need time
and space to figure out who you are, as well, now that the war is over and
all.�

He risked a glance up at Harry to see how his words were being taken, and found
the green-eyed wizard staring at him intently. When the stare became too much
Theo lowered his eyes and cleared his throat nervously.

�Did I overstep my boundaries? If so, I, um, apologize.�

Harry seemed to come out of his stupor as he slowly shook his head from side to
side in a bit of awe at the other man�s insight. �No. You�re, I guess, right. I
do tend to try and fix things all the time. And, I was trying to figure out how
to�well, it doesn�t matter. I need to step back like you said. And, I will.
But, since you seem to know everything, maybe you can tell me what to do in the
meantime. What do I concentrate on to keep from focusing on Gin?�

Theo glanced around the room and saw a certain person watching another certain
person, and thought he�d test the waters for his friend.

�Well, maybe, Harry, you can help me.�

�With what?� Harry asked.

Theo looked at him solemnly with his fingers crossed under the table, �Well, I
happen to know of a couple who may want to get to know each other better. But,
they don�t know how to go about it. And, fear of their friends� reactions is
going to stifle their actions.�

Harry, thinking Theo was referring to himself and Parvati, smiled at him,
�Well, I think people should mind their own business! You can�t control who you
fall for, and you surely shouldn�t be blamed for it!�

Theo nodded, �That�s good, that�s good. Maybe I�ll try
that line on Draco tonight to encourage him.�

Harry�s gasp drew several looks, but he ignored them as he leaned closer to
Theo in shock. The thought that Draco Malfoy was interested in a girl, but
afraid to pursue her was foreign to him. And, that some girl was stupid enough
to fall for him after all he�d done, all he�d been, shocked Harry to his core.
�Malfoy likes someone? And she�s interested in him? Who?�

Theo didn�t answer, but instead looked across the room at Draco. Harry followed
Theo�s eyes to Draco and saw him staring pensively across the room. Harry
followed Draco�s line of vision and his own widened in a mix of horror and
realization.

Hermione and Pansy�s earlier fight played in his head and he clearly remembered
Hermione saying Even if I am the
teensiest bit interested. �No! She�he�they can�t�� he muttered to himself.

Theo raised an eyebrow at him and repeated his own words back at him, �You
can�t control who you fall for, and you surely shouldn�t be blamed for it.�

Harry looked sharply at Theo and reminded himself, that nice or not, there was
a reason the man was a Slytherin. But then he glanced back at Draco and then
Hermione. With a heavy, put upon sigh, Harry leaned back heavily in his chair,
�Well, shit.�

Theo�s soft chuckle grated his nerves, but he didn�t say anything as his mind
whirled and he continued to look back and forth between his best friend and the
man he disliked more than any other.

xxxxx

Author�s Responses:

Rebecca: Thank you. The
fact that I could make someone feel for Gregory Goyle means I am doing
something right. :-)

stella: I am so glad you
liked it! And, now that Hermione knows how she feels, what to do about it�. lol
Thank you, hon!

Moon Goddess: Thank you. I am
glad you are enjoying it.

Mrs.Malfoy:
Every Sunday and Wednesday, hon. :-) I am glad potions worked out that way too.
lol Thank you.

bLondpierogi:
Thank you! I don�t know where the potions class matching came from, but I loved
it when it came. lol Our twosome is going to get together
soon. As a matter of fact, things will jump to her birthday soon, so they will
get moving. ;-)

LadyBlueEyes: Thank you!!! I love my
Theo. I don�t know how he became the center point of things, but it seemed to
work. lol So, what did you think of his meddling? And,
Pansy will do her best, but she is also quite busy figuring out her own love
life. Blaise�yes, he has a long LONG way to go. Sigh.
And, you are right on the money with your thoughts about him. He just doesn�t
know what to do about it all. I love� love love my Greggy. He�s just this
big, lovable, lug, isn�t he? And, no worries, I have plans for him, too. ;-)

Losername: And, I love you for loving
it!! I�m amazed you stayed up all night reading it and I
thank you for doing so! I update every Sunday and Wednesday, so now you won�t
have to keep hitting refresh in hopes of it showing like I do on some of the
stories I am reading. lol I am really glad you are
enjoying the characters and the changes I�ve made to them. It�s been a lot of
fun! And, giving Blaise a �swift kick in the nuts� would only fuel his anger
right now, but I love the idea. ha ha
ha Thank you very much!

� �

kazfeist: Ask and you shall receive. ;-)

��

margaritama: Don�t worry about my Greggy. He will be
fine�promise. Hot Nott. I love it! And, they won�t get
too nice, they�re just going to grow up a bit. ;-)
And, sneak peeks, huh? There�s a thought� Hugs to you!
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Struggling Through New Beginnings