Adult-FanFiction.org : Harry Potter

Precious Mudblood	By : magentasouth Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female > Hermione/Voldemort Views: 79302 -:- Recommendations : 3 -:- Currently Reading : 6
Disclaimer: I neither own nor profit from any part of the Harry Potter universe

Chapter List
- 1-Precious Mudblood
- 2-Ch 2
- 3-Ch 3
- 4-Ch 4
- 5-Ch 5
- 6-Ch 6
- 7-Ch 7
- 8-ch 8
- 9-Ch 9
- 10-Ch 10
- 11-Ch 11
- 12-Ch 12
- 13-Ch 13
- 14-Ch 14
- 15-Ch 15
- 16-Ch 16
- 17-Ch 17
- 18-Ch 18
- 19-Ch 19
- 20-Ch 20
- 21-Ch 21
- 22-Ch 22
- 23-Ch 23
- 24-Ch 24
- 25-Ch 25
- 26-Ch 26
- 27-Ch 27
- 28-Ch 28
- 29-Ch 29
- 30-Ch 30
- 31-Ch 31
- 32-Ch 32
- 33-Ch 33
- 34-Ch 34
- 35-Ch 35
- 36-Ch 36
- 37-Ch 37
- 38-Ch 38
- 39-Ch 39
- 40-Ch 40
- 41-Ch 41
- 42-Ch 42 (edited. longer)
- 43-Ch 43
- 44-Ch 44
- 45-Ch 45
- 46-Ch 46
- 47-Ch 47
- 48-Ch 48
- 49-Ch 49
- 50-Ch 50
- 51-Ch 51
- 52-Ch 52
- 53-Ch 53
- 54-Ch 54
- 55-Ch 55
- 56-Ch 56
- 57-Ch 57
- 58-Ch 58
- 59-Ch 59
- 60-Ch 60
- 61-Ch 61
- 62-Ch 62
- 63-Ch 63
- 64-Ch 64
- 65-Ch 65
- 66-Ch 67
- 67-Ch 67
- 68-Ch 68
- 69-Ch 69
- 70-Ch 70
- 71-Ch 71
- 72-Ch 72
- 73-Ch 73
- 74-Ch 74
- 75-Ch 75
- 76-Chapter 76
- 77-Ch 77
- 78-Ch 78
- 79-Ch 79
- 80-Ch 80
- 18
- 19
- 20
She woke.�

The torch was lit.��

Severus was sitting in the
farthest corner of the room.� He was
drinking from a bottle.�

He sat slumped against the wall, his head turned toward her.� His face had the beginnings of a full
beard.�

He looked like he hadn�t been
sleeping.� He should sleep.� Sleep was the best.

He saw her eyes open and dropped
the bottle, crawling over to her frantically, slipping� and struggling in his drunken
state.�

She watched the bottle sliding and
clirring on the stone floor, amber liquid spilling
out of it all over the floor.�

Severus leaned over her.�

He was �so sorry Hermione�.� Begging her to forgive him.�

Come back.� he�d
never never do it again.�

She let her eyes wander back to
the bottle.� It was almost empty
now.� The liquid
flowing in a little river toward the waste hole.� She wondered vaguely when she last ate.� When she last used the
bathroom.� When
she last walked around.�

Severus was stroking her hair
frantically. Pleading. �

She slid her eyes up to his face and he seemed to
fall apart, sobbing and clutching at her, yelping things at her through his
tears.�

She blinked slowly.�

After a few minutes he became very sad again and lay down on his side on the
floor looking at her and crying softly.�

Her eyes strafed up away from him
again.�

The Dark Lord was standing in the
centre of the room looking down at them both.�

His face was so beautiful.� She was happy he didnt
have to hurt himself anymore.�

She had been so scared when he wouldn�t wake up.�

He furrowed his perfect brow,
looking back and forth between Severus and her.�

She stared at him emptily for a
while and he seemed to become increasingly unsettled.�

Severus was still crying.� He reached out his hand and stroked her cheek
several times.��

she
thought placidly �Go away Severus�.�

The Dark Lord flinched.� He walked forward
and knelt by her, reaching out and slipping his arms underneath her, cradling
her to him.�

Severus seemed to go mad, panicking, clinging to his arm begging him not to
take her away.�� Lord Voldemort ignored
him completely and stood, shrugging him off and turning, disapparating.��

Sunlight streamed down on
her.� She closed her eyes against the
brightness.�

When she opened them again she saw
she was being carried over a grassy field.�
When did she last see the sun.. or see grass..like this?�

The Dark Lord was holding her
gently.� No!� His eyes, he�ll hurt his eyes. She thought
panicked.�

�Do not worry, Hermione.� I am fine�� Lord Voldemort said softly.��

He stopped� in the middle of the field and knelt
with her, laying her down in the tall grass.�

She could hear crickets somewhere.� The
sky was bright blue and white clouds sailed overhead.��

Somewhere there was a bird.�� It was like
her dreams.�

Any second now Harry and Ron would
fly overhead on their brooms.�

�No, Hermione.� Voldemort said
sadly. �That time is past.� You must come
back to me now.� I regret punishing you.
I was very upset. �I should have come
sooner but I did not listen to Severus when he said something was wrong.�

That he was frightened,

that he thought he had.. broken
you.��

...He is frequently quite overdramatic
and ...�� he
fell silent, his red eyes looked her over worriedly.

�Hermione..
Please come back. �Your mind is so quiet..��

He appeared to flinch, his eyes
darting up suddenly� �
I..I need to go and see to Severus for a few minutes.� You are quite safe here.� If you stay here, I will come back.. and.. and..
I�ll do whatever you like.� Tell a joke,
sing a song, do a dance.� Anything.�

Just.. stay here and watch
the clouds and don�t move.� Alright?� Hermione?��

The Dark Lord didn�t sound like
himself at all.�

He disapparated.��

She lay quite still watching the
clouds sail overhead.� The tall grass
framed her view and glinted in green and gold.�

Any second now she was sure Harry and Ron would turn up.� It didn�t matter if the Dark Lord said they
wouldn�t.�

There was a crack and Lord Voldemort
appeared again.� He looked terribly
sad.�

She wished she could give him whatever he wanted to be happy now but she had no
magic.� She couldn�t help him now.

His eyes shot to her face and he
suddenly appeared to be struggling with different worrying ideas.��

His gaze dropped uneasily to the necklace sitting on her breastbone in the
neckline of her robe. ��Reaching out a hand,
he touched it, stroked it.� His face was
full of dread.�

�I could give you your magic back,
Hermione.� Is that what you need?� Will you come back if I do?� Or will you kill me? �

He shuddered, looked like a man contemplating the final walk up to the
gallows.�

�Everything is.. not as I
wished it to be.�� He paused, unhappily
introspective.�

� You were supposed to join me.. We were supposed to
be happy together.. three
together.��

�Perhaps you were right.� Perhaps I poison everything.� I could have simply told you the truth in the
beginning..

...but I ...feared you, I suppose.� And I feared you would not want me, despite
what your magic desired.� �

�You are too good.� You think of others more than your own
happiness. You might have killed me to protect... everyone..
...everyone that is left.��

�I was concerned regarding Severus.� He loved you.�
He might love you more than he does myself.�

You loved him too.� And where would I be?��

The perfect snow white face
tightened as if in pain.

�He poisoned himself Hermione!� Isn�t that extraordinary?!� I-I never expected...�

I had to return because I felt his mark weakening.� ...He is barely alive.��

�I did not listen to him when he
begged me to help.� I was angry with
you.� But you are right.� I poison everything.�

I am always alone.� �

He lapsed into silence, slouched beside her in black and white and red, a
creature of a different colour spectrum to the bright summery world around
him.�

Hermione blinked up at him.� �don�t worry� she
thought.� �I won�t leave you alone�.�

He looked at her desperately.� �Then come back!� Come back Hermione!� Speak!�
Please.. I ..� �

she could see him fighting with himself against the words he wanted to
say.�

�Why does Severus keep hurting
me?� she wondered at him silently.

His eyes flashed and his brow tightened in anxiety. �Because I broke him..Hermione.� long ago.��

�I have known him too long.� He was
already fractured and I destroyed him, just as he destroyed you.�

What is left is ..damaged.�

He does not know who to be for you.� He
needs you painfully.� He has needed you
for so long.��

�He enjoys pain..he
has been conditioned to enjoy pain.. he enjoys your
pain..but he also believes that if he hurts you, I
will allow him to be around you.��

She nodded internally.� �and Lucius?�� The Dark Lord scowled.�

�Lucius
is simply what is technically known as a bastard.� You might say a twisted bastard.. but almost everyone around me is
twisted or warped in some way, I have found.��

�Lucius.. you would not believe it.. but even Lucius cares for you in his own way.� He has an..unusual.. manner
of showing affection, you will have noticed by now.� He equates fear with desire.� Thus when he fears you..
he most urgently desires you. �

In his sublime arrogance, he assumes the same is true for everyone else.��

�He has had considerable influence
on Severus as they were growing up.� They
have frequently shared things in the past.�
Severus is one of the only people that Lucius will share anything with.�

Believing you to belong to Severus, he tried to claim you too � to share that
pleasure with his.. I dont
know what Severus is to him. �...Certainly
�friend� does not cover it adequately.� I
have not obliged Severus to remain �faithful� as you would understand it.� I simply require that his primary loyalty.. his greatest affection.. be always for me.��

�i want to go back now� Hermione said.� Her voice felt strange and sounded foreign to
her ears.�

The Dark Lord gasped in shock and
literally fell on her in overwhelmed
relief, clutching her to him and kissing her forehead, cheeks, nose, showering
her in little kisses, �Hermione..� he moaned.� �I was so worried.� When I saw you in that room and you were so
pale and silent..your mind.. you were almost no longer there.�

I am sorry... for placing you there.��

�I�m sorry for..
for..� he swallowed.

�..-killing your parents.. and
your friends and taking away the sun and�
and.. and your
cat!� Would you like a cat?�

Or a lion??

or a Gryffin?�
I�ll find you one.��

�I want to see Severus� she
said.�

The Dark Lord became very
still.� He looked worried. �I.. don�t believe that�s a good idea..at
present.. Hermione.�

He is very weak. He..�
he-� the Dark Lord�s voice broke slightly

�he will..almost certainly.. be
better in a few days.. perhaps a few weeks at
most.� I�m sure he will recover��

He didn�t look sure at all.�

�Take me to Severus� Hermione
commanded placidly again.�

Voldemort appeared to struggle
internally.� His gorgeous face was
pinched and anxious.� The expression was
as natural on him as a tutu on an alligator.

Finally he nodded silently and stood, offering a hand down to Hermione.� She took it hesitantly and let him help her
to her feet.� The movement felt
unfamiliar and clumsy.�

The Dark Lord pressed her gently to his chest and wrapped his arms around her
tightly before he disapparated.�

They reappeared in the Dark Lords
bedchamber.� It was brighter than she had
seen it before. �The shadows had been
chased away and candles and torches all threw golden light around the
room.�

A very pale unshaven miserable and
ill Severus lay in the Dark Lords bed, his eyes closed, his
face slack.� At the side of the bed, a
woman in pale green robes was carrying out tests on him with her wand and
noting her observations with a quick quotes quill and parchment.�

�Healer Dawes� Voldemort
acknowledged politely.� The woman
nodded, distracted.� �What have you
found?��

The woman frowned.� �It is as you feared.� He has taken some form of snake venom.� It is difficult to ascertain which since all
the vials were broken.� If I cannot
determine what venom he has swallowed, I cannot produce an antivenom for it.��

The woman did not need to spell
out what this would mean.�

The Dark Lord became agitated. �There
must be a way to find out!� Is there no
test you can perform?� How do the muggles manage?�� You
will find a way! �If Severus dies, you
and your entire extended family will be following him through death�s door soon
after in order to apologise in person for your failure.��

Hermione smiled.� He did have a way with people.�

She walked, with stiff weakened limbs,
to the bed and sat on the edge next to Severus.�
He looked so very unhappy.�

She felt sorry that she had not responded to him for the last..
however long it had been.. when
he had been pleading and trying anything to get her attention.

She had just not been able to see him properly..

she couldn�t really understand what he was saying. It
was just all far away and somehow not important.�

But now she wanted him back.�

�Severus� she whispered.�

Remarkably, his eyes rolled under
the thin skin and he opened his eyelids a crack, displaying terribly bloodshot
eyeballs.� He almost looked like the Dark
Lord.�

�-nee� he croaked.��

She smiled at him.� A small smile but a real
one. �Her voice was whispery soft
but she felt clearer with each minute somehow.

�I�m back Severus.�
The Dark Lord fixed me...� Why did
you go and do something stupid like this?!�
What did you take?�

He tried to speak.� Large tears fell out of his eyes.� He could only rasp.

�Think it, Severus!!� Think it clearly so that he can hear
you��

Severus blinked and more tears
rolled down.�

�No!.� Voldemort
hissed.� �Why would you do that?� How could you.. Why, Severus?!��

Hermione looked up at him confused.�

�He doesn�t know what he
took.� He grabbed the first vial without
looking and then tossed the rack onto the floor.��

Hermione spun and looked at Severus,
shocked and sad beyond expression.� She
felt Voldemort step up behind her.� He
was fumbling at her necklace and finally he ripped the chain and tossed it to
the bed.�

�Fix him!� FIX HIM, HERMIONE!!� he demanded desperately.

She turned and looked at him in
wonder.� �I..I�m
not sure how to.� It�s not like you.� He isn�t just magically weak.. he�s poisoned!��

Voldemort� pulled out his wand and for a moment
she thought that he was going to curse her.�
Then he pointed it at healer Dawes and muttered� �You are of no use here.��

He hesitated and looked back at Hermione for a second, a flash of irritation
crossing his face.�

�Stupefy!��

The woman collapsed like a felled tree and he banished her wordlessly.�

Hermione wondered if he hadn�t
been intending to avada her before he thought better
of it.�

The Dark Lord hesitated again
indecisively and then dropped to his knees before her.�

�Please.�

Please Hermione!� I...need him.�
Fix him!� I couldn�t stand it if he died.� He is...he is dear to me.�

He seemed to have extreme difficulty saying this and stilled, looking
ashamed.� Frustrated anger danced with
helpless worried agitation on his delicate features.� His eyes implored her.�

Severus watched him through the
barest milimeter cracked eyes and she could see him
trying to raise a sarcastic questioning brow.�

She smiled.�

Turning, she focused on Severus
body.. trying to see what she
should do.� After a few minutes she
grimaced, confused.� Nothing was
happening. �

�I think my mind is in the way� she muttered.�
�I don�t know how to do it.. where
to even begin.��

She had an idea and climbed up
onto the bed, crawling gingerly over Severus legs, and moved to lie next to him
and put her arm over him.�

�Could you vanish his clothing?� She
asked.�

She thought.. if she could
just...make it more like it had been when she healed the Dark Lord, it might be
better.�

The Dark Lord responded
immediately, vanishing his clothing, her clothing and all the blankets.� She frowned at him slightly irked.�

He pointed his wand down at himself and vanished his own clothing, walking
quickly around the bed and climbing in behind her.� Hermione looked back over her shoulder at him
surprised.�

�That is..
a little distracting, you know��

He smiled uneasily,
the smile trembled and flickered in a rictus. �I thought
It would help you think less.�

�Hold him..� he commanded.�

She curled closer, carefully lifting Severus arm and crawling beneath. �He groaned weakly in pain when she touched
him. �She saw the barest hint of his
eyeball trying to focus on her.� His body
was very cool.�

She wrapped herself around him,
slinging her leg over his and placing her hand on his heart.� She felt the Dark Lord slide up against her.
He raised his leg to follow the line of hers and rested it against Severus
leg.�

It was.. almost.. a complete reversal of the morning they had woken in bed
together. �

She was returning her attention to
trying to find her magic, that place she had flexed a few times before to make
it flow.

Just at that second the world
became slightly fuzzy and golden.. Lord
Voldemort...�

� Tom.� He was Tom, her mind supplied inanely. He is Tom.
Wonderful beautiful powerful Tom.�

...� was unfolding his magic.� It was.. so different when they were all
touching each other like this.� Even Severus
responded. His eyes opened a touch wider.�

She felt around in herself and found that place she had been looking for.. it was.. it
was like it wasn�t IN her at all.�

It was.. kind of in
everything and she just sort of caught it and bent it and then it flowed
through her.�

She pushed, hard..
and she thought about how much she wanted Severus to
be like he was.. not sick.. or
hurt or even scraggly.�

He should be like he was when she saw him the night of the ball when she first
woke up.�

He was so calm and healthy and dignified and wonderful.� Her heart had ached for him. �

She saw nothing,
her mind seemed full of soft golden buttery warmth. Everything was ok.�

She thought about strong beautiful professor Snape..Severus.
�

She felt Tom at her ear all of a
sudden.� It penetrated the gold haze.� He whispered gently.� Wouldn�t it be good if he were a little
younger too..�
You made me young.. he�ll
feel so old with two teenagers.��

It did sound like a good idea now that she heard it.� She wanted to giggle inanely.�

She felt the golden fizzy feeling increase further, it
was almost like a state of euphoria.�

She looked down at Severus.� She was surprised that he looked well
already.� Better than
well, his face looked exactly like he had the night of the ball.�

There were no scars on his body now.�

That was an accident.� It wasn�t really
right, the scars were him.. but she couldn�t really remember
exactly where they had been to put them back. ��

A pale hand moved in her peripheral vision and came to rest gently on Severus
abdomen.�

Severus turned his head further
toward her, gasping deeply and the pleasure on his face was raw and open.� There was something bizarrely helpless and
kitten-like to his movements.� She
considered..

�Tom� is right.� He might feel old..�

She wanted to do something but didn�t know how. �She had only known him to look like this.� It wasn�t like the scars where she just
hadn�t really seen them in her memory�s impression of him � it was different to
just wish him young.� She didn�t have any
idea what that looked like.�

She had seen Severus healthy and she had seen Tom with hair and a nose.. but she had no concept of what a
young Severus Snape would look like.�

�I.. I
don�t know how to do it.� She slurred hazily �You know how he looked, Tom.� You do it.��

She half turned to look at him.� He
seemed confused and faintly irritated.�

�What do you mean?!� .. and Tom?!�

He seemed about to say more on the
topic of appropriate modes of addressing his Lordship � the flight of death
himself.�

�Yes, yes,� she said.� �Tom�
If I pass you the magic, maybe you can focus it?� Or no.� Use legilimency.� You know what he looked like.� You can show me.��

She was startled to note that each of these ideas caused the snake eyed man to startle
and then glow more and more with avarice and anticipation.� The issue of Tom was long forgotten in light of the possibility of him somehow
being able to steer her powers himself.�

She suddenly had a feeling like
she had done something silly again, putting this temptation in front of
him.� It probably would have been better..safer.. to just berate Severus to
create some kind of youthening potion.�

Professor Dumbledore was right after all - the easy way is not always the best
way she mused.�

And then there was no point in
chiding herself anymore because the Dark Lord had already climbed into her mind
entirely and it felt like he was wearing her like a glove.�

She observed herself move her leg, nestling it higher around Severus own.� She watched her fingers flex.�

In her ear a seductive voice
whispered.� �It feels good to be inside
you, Hermione.. although.. I
can imagine ways in which this could be even better�

she felt his smirk on her own lips suddenly.�
Severus blinked up at her in confusion.�

Her eyes turned down toward him and she watched her hand rising from his heart
and slipping deep into his hair, clenching hard in a practised manner.� The man flinched and shuddered, suddenly
understanding.�

He moaned throatily, urgently�
�My Lord.. more!!� Oh.. Merlin! �Like this... So...�

He appeared too aroused by the strange situation and the residual wash of the
Dark Lord�s magic to articulate in coherent sentences.��

Her hand withdrew from his hair
and returned to his chest.� She found
herself saying in a tone of voice quite unlike herself �Mmmm
perhaps another time, Severus. We have more pressing matters to attend to at
present��

Severus moaned needily but remained still.�

Nothing happened for a couple of
seconds and she had a strange feeling that the Dark Lord was fumbling around in
her.. not in her mind.. deeper.. as if he were brushing
through her very essence..

and then briefly it seemed like there was that sensation
of flow..but it was stilted, slow, a trickle
stuttering and then gone again. ��

He had found it, whatever it was, already.

�Tom, stop! She thought
desperately.� Just show me what I need to
see and I�ll do it!��

He whispered in her ear
again.� �That isn�t how legilimency
works.� I can�t show you things inside
your mind, for that you have to come inside my mind, and you don�t yet know how
to do that.� It�s better that I just try to do it myself��

She felt a great gush of icy fear wash over her.� The Dark Lord fumbled around inside her some
more.� He seemed to find it more quickly
this time..

There was a trickle of cold.� She heard a
triumphant breath catch at her ear.�

Then there was a massive roar of cold.�

Severus cried out in pain and the
Dark Lord moaned in her ear. �

She couldn�t move.� It felt like standing
underneath a massive waterfall, except that it was more like standing around the waterfall while it raged
through her body and down her spine.

The Dark Lord was groaning in
pleasure �oh.. Salazar... Hermione... so.. much.. there
is so ..much..��

�STOP!!!� she screamed in her head.. �you�re hurting him!!�

She felt like her blood was freezing in her veins and Severus was stretched and
strained in pain.�

She was trying to take back her body but it wasn�t responding.� She was a silent passenger in her own
mind.�

It was like the feeling of Severus using legilimency to ...to..�� it was like that feeling.

She could feel herself losing grip on everything again.��

�Please..
please stop..� she cried desperately, feeling herself
retreat by inches.�

The Dark Lord was panting at her
ear and her own hand was stretched, trembling in exertion.�

She felt the magic he was channelling shifting, twisting, until it surrounded
all of them.�

He was doing something.�

Whatever it was -It wasn�t what he said he was going to do.�

Why did she trust him again?!�
Why did she keep falling for
these two?! �Aargh.� She was so damn stupid!!��

The man behind her seemed to come
to himself slightly.�

He licked her earlobe lightly and whispered ��Don�t worry.� I�ll fix Severus now��

She watched as the stiff pained
man she was curled up against began to change.�
When it stopped she was looking at a boy in his mid twenties.� He would still be the oldest after all she mused.�

�This was the age I thought he
looked the most lovely� the Dark Lord said softly against her ear.�

She wasn�t sure.� She thought the professor looked pretty
lovely as the man he had been.� This was
almost a boy.� He was slender and pale.
His hair was longer and straighter.�

Severus opened his eyes and it was clear it was the same person.� However where he had been broad and powerful
and harsh and cruel looking, now there was something
still tender about him. Like a young sapling that had not yet weathered the
elements.�

He was dark and otherworldly, but smooth and sweet, rather than rich and
bitter.� She wasn�t sure she preferred
it.�

Severus was looking at her and
proved how little things changed when he after a few seconds raised a hand to
his face and along the length of his hair and said in an irate.. but much younger and less deep
and powerful voice

�WHAT did you do, Miss Gr... Hermione.?!��

He narrowed his eyes at her.�

She smirked.� �I healed you.� The rest is.. not my fault.� Not even my idea actually.� You have your strange serpent god here to
thank for that.��

The Dark Lord uncurled from her and lay back on the bed.� �You�re welcome, Severus� Voldemort said
snidely, with a smirk on his perfect cupids bow lips.

�My Lord..
why would you..�
..Hecates saggy tits I loathe the way my voice
sounded at this age. �

Fix what you�ve done, damn it all to hell!��

Hermione raised an eyebrow.� Well that she should be able to do, she
guessed.�

She concentrated and pushed gently on ..on..everything.. and thought about how
wonderfully sexy the professor sounded.�

�Is that better?� she asked,
curious herself.�

The Dark Lord sat up and looked over her at Severus, lying there soft and
strange and young.�

�I�m not sure..
ah.� Yes.� It seems so.�
Well done.� Two thousand points to
Gryffindor, Miss Granger.�

Hermione smirked against this strange softer Severus� chest.�

He was even more bizarre with a young frame together with a voice that spoke of
several hundred too many cigars and firewhiskeys.�

�Oh.. That
really is an improvement!� The Dark
Lord spoke.� �I had thought you were
utterly perfect at that moment in time, but it seems that some things really do
improve with age.��

Severus took this backhanded insult with aplomb.�

Hermione spoke into Severus
skin.� �You have what you wanted
now.� We�re all back in bed.. Maybe next time we could find a less dangerous way of
initiating intimacy than torture, imprisonment and suicide.��

Severus seemed to suddenly realise where they were himself now.� His breath caught.�

He lifted a hand carefully, turning his head to look down at her on his
shoulder, and brought it toward her, perhaps to stroke her cheek..but stopped, a few inches away... his hand shook.�

�I�m...I�m so, so sorry Hermione.� I-..I didn�t think..it would.. you would.. ...after
our bath I thought..

I�ll never, never
do it again.�
I�m sorry�

his voice was threatening to become a pleading wail.�

�Please forgive me!!� Please.. please don�t leave me again.. I�ll
do anything.. just tell me
and I�ll do it..�

I- ..I was wrong.
I don�t like to see you hurt.� It�s more than I can stand!��

She watched him silently with soft
eyes.� �Sev.� I love you� She whispered as if he were an
idiot.�

His eyes widened to the size of
saucers and he froze, his fingers hovering in the air, trembling violently.�

�I won�t leave you.�

She felt the Dark Lord... she felt
Tom stiffen slightly behind her.�

It seemed like she could almost taste his sudden blind fear filling the
air.� They would have each other now. �Mutual love. �They would both
leave him now, no matter what he did to force compliance. Hermione could use
her ability.�

He had saved them both only to lose them.�
If he had picked only one he wouldn�t be alone.�

She took her hand off Severus
chest gently, looking up at his eyes, willing him not to take it as a
rejection.�

Rolling in bed she turned to curl herself around Tom�s body.� He was lying very
still, a perfectly blank look on his face.�

She put her face on his bleached perfect chest, kissing his skin and whispered
against him, her eyes looking up into his carefully empty ones,

�I love you too Tom.� ...It�s ok.. you don�t ever need to say it
back.� I know you care...in your way.� I won�t leave you either.�

His face melted somewhat into
restrained caught-breath relief.� He
seemed to want to say something but kept stopping himself, unsure.�

She felt Severus turn and wrap his
smooth body against hers.� He reached out
over her and slid his slender newly youthful hand down Tom�s white
musculature.� Hermione nestled back
against him slightly and he turned his head down to look at her in wonder.�

�I want you to bind with me� the
Dark Lord suddenly blurted.

Severus stiffened behind her, his
arms gripping her just a little more tightly.�
The Dark Lord�s slitted eyes darted at them and away again.�

He seemed to expect this to cause a fight. �He looked like he was preparing himself to
argue her coolly and masterfully into submission.�

Hermione wondered cynically about his reasons for wanting this now.�

�Are you still worried I�m going
to harm you?� she asked.�

He hesitated.�

Time stretched out for a minute
while they all lay silently, lost in their own thoughts.�

�Ok.� Hermione finally said.� �I�ll bind with you.� ..With both of you, if you
want.� It makes no
difference.� I want to stay here.� with you.� both.�

Severus clutched at her urgently.
�I won�t let.. anyone..� hurt you, Hermione.��

Lord Voldemort turned his head slowly to look over at them both.� �I do not intend to hurt her, Severus� he
said softly.� Severus looked at him, his eyes hooded, and said nothing.��

�I dont
want you to hurt anyone else either� she said turning to look at the white face
watching her carefully.�

�Or at least.. � she smirked wryly, being realistic,
�I don�t want you to hurt people that I care for, simply out of jealousy.� You don�t need to worry anymore if I do
this.� I will be ...yours.� I- ...I can�t let you..��

The beautiful face twisted into an
ugly sneer and the Dark Lord leapt out of bed abruptly to stand, glaring down
at her.� �Let me?� he scoffed.� His face a venomous mask.�

�You see.. we return
inevitably to the core of our dilemma, Hermione..� You would seek to control me, now that you
have grasped your capabilities.��

�This face-� he
pointed at himself angrily �has led you to imagine that I am your peer.�

I am not!� I have seen and done and
learned more than you can even begin to imagine in your innocence.��

I am not your �schoolchum� or your �boyfriend�, nor
will I ever be.�

�You called me Tom!�

You would seek to command.. ME. .� Lord Voldemort!� You DARE to dictate to me, what I will and
will not do.?!

I have fought and won control over the entire British Wizarding world!! � I have
brought it to its very knees before me - and you would now rule ME?!.

You live, girl, because I have allowed
it!� Because I chose to
SAVE you and hide you from discovery, even to
yourself.� �

The wizarding world would have destroyed you if they knew. Immediately!� They would have done it while you were weak.
You would have been even more feared than I!��

�I allowed you to become strong.� I did not kill you when you threatened me.. when you wished my death even as
I held you, comforting you!��

I did not so much as punish you greatly!
�What you experienced with Lucius was Death Eater foreplay.�

When I realised you were harmed in the cell nonetheless, I sought to restore
you!�

And you would repay me by seeking to enslave me?!��

�You will never command me, girl.� I
will die first.� I will destroy.. everything..
before I relinquish it to your control.�

It is mine.��

She dropped her eyes, shocked and
suddenly strangely guilty.� The thought
of ruling had occurred to her.�

It was still sitting there in the back of her mind. She could twist the magic
and have the world on a string. It would be easy if she just let go
completely.� She could rule
everything.�

It was what he wanted after all.�

He would have her do it at his command as soon as he could get her entirely
under his control. �She should act
now.�

But.. but then she would lose them.�

She would lose him.� He would never stop fighting..

Maybe she could force him to but then he wouldn�t be him at all anymore. He
would be broken.�

She didn�t think he would come
back like she had, like Severus had.�

She didn�t want that, she found.�

It was selfish perhaps � she really should think of the wizarding world but
without Tom it was like there was no warmth anywhere.�

Her thoughts were interrupted by
the unexpected click at her throat and then Severus arms clamped painfully
around her, kissing her neck and her ear and whispering apologies.�

She felt numb and dully angry with him but it was almost..
expected.. she realised.�

�Severus you complete arse� she ground out. �You fucking did
it again!!� ��

He curled against her desperately.

�AGAIN!!� she yelled.�

The Dark Lord was smirking at her
as if to say �don�t look at me, I didn�t do anything
this time.�� He looked at his servant
approvingly.�

Severus whispered at her urgently �I�m sorry!�
I�m sorry Hermione, I had to.� You
would..ruin everything.�

This time it will be different.� I won�t
allow anyone to hurt you.� I�ll stay with
you until it�s safe to take it off again.�

I won�t fail you this time.�

Please.. understand � you
need to see how much better it would
be if you stayed here.. like this...with us.� ..with me..�

I�ll find a way to make you happy.��

He was nuzzling her neck with his large nose and she wanted to be angry and
hurt and scared but somehow.. she
just didn�t have the energy right now.��

The Dark Lord, watching them,
seemed to soften and re-approached the bed, climbing on it and crawling
gracefully to her, shifting to straddle her thighs and lean down over her.�

Severus clutched her desperately, indecisively unwilling to make room but
obviously distressed at the prospect of upsetting the Dark Lord.

Voldemort didn�t bother to speak, he simply plunged
his hand into Severus hair and dragged him forcibly back as if he were
nothing.� Then he crouched lower and
brought his face down, kissing her pouting resistant lips gently.�

�You are safe� he murmured between soft kisses.�
�I will protect you from harm
until you are bound to me�

She felt another small flare of
irritation.� This was not the way it was
supposed to be.�

It was bad enough that he demanded she take the mark..
but a binding purely
out of fear and mistrust..a binding blackmailed with
the loss of her magic - that was so wrong.

Binding meant marriage and marriage was special.�

She had expected something more than this when she eventually married.� She didn�t know what exactly.��

Flowers.�

Bended knee proposals, romance, love damnit!�

Even Severus wouldn�t just require a binding of her without ever
bothering to ask, she thought.�

The Dark Lord brushed his cool
pale face against hers and murmured in the ear closest to Severus seductively

�You know you are important to me, Hermione.
�..You said so.� ...You said you didn�t expect flowery
declarations from me. � that I didn�t need to say it..�
Come.. You know you want this.� Is it simply an issue of pride?��

He licked at her ear teasingly.�

She turned her head toward Severus.� He was watching her silently, his eyes
haunted and full of need.�

�What about Severus.. �

she forced herself not to call him Tom. He was not Tom. But she could not call
him lord right now.�

�Will you bind yourself with Severus?� May he bind himself with me also?��

Voldemort hesitated.�

�Severus does not require that from me, I trust him implicitly ...and I will
not allow him to have such a connection with you.� You are mine
as he is mine. ...Perhaps I may
allow you both to enjoy one another but you will never forget that you belong to me.� Your first loyalty should always be to
me.��

He turned to Severus, who had
crumpled somehow.� His new face was so
different.� He looked...vulnerable.�

It was wrong on him.� He should never
look less than the unassailable fortress of a man she had worshipped.�

The Dark Lord looked at him
intently for long seconds, their eyes focussed on one another.�

After a while Severus squeezed his
eyes shut as if in anguish and nodded unhappily.��

The Dark Lord�s face darkened slightly and he rose up to rest on his splayed
knees over her.

�Perhaps..� perhaps you may be right, my dear.� I will think on it.� ...It would complicate matters to bind you
both.��

Severus eyes flew open, shocked and hopeful.�
Hermione reached out and stroked his chest gently, her hand gliding up
to his hair and tugging him toward them both coaxingly.�

Severus looked up warily at the
Dark Lord, who gave him a wan smile.� �Yes.. join us, my pet.� You desire it so desperately.� Come.. please the one you want.�

Severus hesitated again before
rising up and kissing the snowflake white boy passionately, his hands sliding
over his chest, grazing his nipples, scratching lightly down his sides.��

Hermione watched, entranced.�

They had been beautiful together
before.. But now.. now - both so very
lovely of face and with lithe supple bodies they were blinding.��

She let her hand run down Severus lower back, over his arse and thigh feeling
his warm lean muscle.�

He shivered and moaned softly into the Dark Lord�s mouth.�

Her eyes wandered over their bodies together.. pale and paler.� They
were both already hard.� She could just..

her hand hesitated in midair..� she licked her lips
indecisively.��

Voldemort�s hand reached out and
captured her own, dragging it firmly to his cock and wrapping her fingers
around the shaft.�

She looked up at him, startled, catching the faint smirk as he devoured the
other boy half wrapped around him.�

She stroked him up and down tentatively, watching them..�

He pulled back from the kiss for only a second and muttered something and she
felt her hand become slick with some kind of oil.

Pleased, she took her hand off his hard length and rubbed it against her other
hand, spreading the substance around.�

Voldemort cracked an eye and
peered down at her, probably irritated that his hand job had ceased so
prematurely, but she was already putting her hand back, and now she could take Severus
cock in her other hand.�

He jerked at the unexpected sensation and then groaned deep in his throat.�

She rubbed them slowly,
lingeringly, enjoying the effect she could see it having on their kisses.

The Dark Lord was sucking and biting Severus throat and shoulders now, whose
head was thrown eagerly to the side.�

She could feel Severus heartbeat against her fingertips on his cock.�

He opened his eyes and looked at
her then, his eyes soft and half lidded from the sensations he was
experiencing.�

He bucked his hips into her hand, fucking it playfully and she smiled in
wonder.�

She stared up into his eyes wanting him, wanting both of them.�

They were gorgeous to watch but she wanted to taste... to feel.�

�Kisss
her, Severuss.. I know you
want to..� The Dark Lord hissed against his throat,
nipping him.

She quirked
slightly at the sound.� She had
thought that his slight snakelike slurr when excited
was a product of his other body but it seemed it might just be a parseltongue
thing.� She kind of liked it..� she
liked it when he made those sounds although she wondered what he was saying
every time.. it did
things to her somehow.. sent sparks skittering up her
spine.�

As if in response to her thought
he did hiss something quite long in parseltongue now..
the layered hissing contained strange harmonics.�

She shuddered excitedly and saw Severus react similarly �God that�s sexy.. what did you say?� she said throatily.�

�I told Severuss
to hurry up and kisss you ssso
that I can fuck him..��

She smirked excitedly as Severus
emitted a guttural sound of need and fell upon her, his smooth hot lips
bruising.�

He kissed her hungrily, desperately, as if he might never get the chance
again.� She responded eagerly, running
her slick hands over his shoulders and back, oiling him and pulling him down
closer.�

The Dark Lord shifted back to make room for Severus to swing his leg over her,
to straddle her thighs.�

He pressed himself low against her, his chest touching her nipples every so
often.�

She felt his hard cock resting heavily against her thigh.� That tiny faint glow of fear ignited again..

Severus trying to fuck her in the bath.�

It would only take a movement and the right angle on his part right now, she
was soaking wet, probably leaving a puddle underneath herself on the bed.�

She couldn�t see the Dark Lord
now.� When she did crack her eyes every
so often her entire world was filled with Severus lean pale surly young face
and the dark long black hair��

Obscurely she suddenly wondered what would happen when Lucius
saw his new appearance.� There was a
faint snort out of her view but from somewhere around her knees.

�Probably sssomething
much like what we are doing to him,
my dear, although I exssspect there would be more
blood and possssibly a dead muggle toy or two.��

Severus made a slightly worried
sound that faintly resembled �Huh??�� but did not stop kissing her for a moment.. his hand had moved up and was stroking her as if she were a
skittish animal of some kind.. His fingertips repeatedly moving over her
breast, her side.. down
further..she felt him petting her mons.�

It was a strange way to be touched.. it felt like he was trying to calm her.. there
was something slightly tremulous..or anxious.. to the touch..

She felt his fingers slide ever so gently slowly down, stroking her slit...and
slipping easily in.�

She bucked her hips up at him suggestively, wanting more.� She was sopping.�

He growled aggressively into her
mouth, probing deeper through her slippery folds and running his fingertip over
her tight little hole.�

She gasped slightly and he pulled his fingers back, withdrawing from the kiss
and plunging them into his mouth, sucking on them as if they contained a drug
he was in withdrawl from.�

When he opened his eyes again they were dark with lust and she felt him draw
back off her slightly and then move forward again, angling his cock down into
her lips.�

He was pulled sharply backward and then he yelped, his face creasing slightly
with surprise and pain.�

�No..Severusss. we have dissscussed thisss�� That is mine.�
You may be allowed to have her after the binding.� We sshall
sssee.�
For now, you will lick her only.��

She looked up at the Dark Lord,
kneeling very close behind Severus, he had a lazy amused expression on his face
and he was rocking his hips gently forward against Severus ass slowly.�

Severus face was somewhere between agonized and ecstatic.� He was gasping in little gulps and the
muscles in his shoulders were tense.�

Something clicked into focus and
she realised that Voldemort was actually balls deep inside his arse.�

�It wasssnt
a ssssuggesstion.� Offer your pusssy
to him, Hermione.. he hungersss for you...and I wish to watch him pleasse you..�� His
red eyes flamed brightly for a second in desire.�

She reached back for the headboard
and pulled herself up the bed below the kneeling Severus, till she rested half
reclined on the pillows against it.� Both
men watched her and she felt their eyes sliding over her body.�

Severus balanced himself, making
room as she slowly parted her legs for him.�
He feasted his eyes on her spread pink lips, the neatly trimmed brown
curls on her mons glistening with her juices, then he gripped her below each knee and forced her wider
still.� She heard a murmur of approval
from Voldemort.�

Without warning Severus plunged,
burying his face deep in her wet pussy and licking as if he were starving and
she were his favourite flavour of ice cream.�

She bucked up against his face � hard! It was too much..
it didn�t sate the excited little arousal, it merely
ignited it further like an itch that increases when scratched. ��

Urgent lust twitched her hips under his mouth. �She moaned, but it had a note of desperate
need to it.�

She felt him painting her with long hard laves of his flattened tongue, sucking
up as much of her slickness as he could.�

He was making little excited moans against her.�

She gyrated her hips in response
to his movements and he pressed into her with his face hard then..

After a moment he pulled back again recovering and she realised Voldemort had
begun to fuck him properly now, thrusting roughly into him.� He was moaning and panting as he rocked back
against him

�Pay attention to what you are
doing, Sseveruss..� If you come before sshe
doess,� I will punish you ssseverely.�

The Dark Lord�s voice sounded strained and distracted.� �The sssooner sshe comesss..
the ssooner I will have her ssssuck your cock�

Severus made an inarticulate noise somewhere between a pleading whine and a groan
of need and resumed bathing her with his tongue, quickly moving to pay
attention to her clit. �

It felt amazing.. she
couldn�t stop herself from jerking and moving under his lips, she could hear herself making the most desperate
needy sounds. �But..something
was missing.�

She sighed in relief when she felt
a single long digit invade her body tentatively.� Now it was...more...� she panted and tried to give herself over to
the sensation.. reminded
herself that it was professor Snape�s
mouth that was currently on her.�

He who was fingering her, wanting her..just as she�d dreamed of and fantasized about for years.�

But it didnt change the effect.�

She was writhing in pleasure but
there was also a growing amount of frustration in her movement, desperation
because although it felt sooooo good.. God it felt good... she just couldn�t feel that building
pressure signalling her oncoming climax.�
Instead it was as if this itch just grew..�

She whimpered and pressed herself
hard against his face that was forced against her rhythmically now with Voldemort�s
thrusts.�

She turned her gaze up to the Dark Lord who had been watching her with
glittering eyes while he pumped into the man beneath him roughly and she
suddenly realised what it was... the problem... that itch..�
she loved Severus and she wanted him.. she had wanted him for so long now.�

But now she wanted the Dark Lord more.. perhaps.. loved him more too?� Could that be?�� She whined in unwilling realization.�

The look on his face changed
suddenly to one of triumph greater than any conqueror.� He slammed into Severus hard, violent in his
joy.� She heard a yelp from severus between her thighs.��

She looked up at the pale beautiful boy and admitted to herself that she wished
he were thrusting into her instead of Severus.�

She wished she could have his face
licking her, his fingers touching
her.� She groaned in frustrated
need.� �

And then he hissed.. the sound was dark and
seductive.. it wrapped around her mind like oiled
velvet.�

She felt a change..�
A destination to her pleasure.�

He did it again..
not the same sound but it pushed her hard and she found herself almost at the
edge of her tipping point..

�Just a little more.. oh God.. please..
do that again� she found herself thinking. �Please,
please, please, please my Lord.��

Her mouth only moaned inarticulately. �

�Am I truly your lord?� Voldemort
murmured, almost too softly to hear.�

She tried to think but her mind
was just full of need, blinding, desperate, urgent.� Need she dimly registered
only he could satisfy, despite the
arousing teasing sensations of Severus tongue at her core.� She wondered vaguely whether she could come
at his word even without such
stimulation.�

It was a kind of devotion..a worship.. She worshiped this man more than she had ever
worshipped anything else, certainly more than the muggle god of her
parents.�

Perhaps it was right to call him �Lord� then.�
She could never deny him anything, would never want to..��

She faintly noticed a golden sheen to everything.�

�Yes! Yes you are my Lord!� Yes.. please!� Anything.. for you!�� she cried
out through the pleasure and he hissed loudly, overcome himself, his head
thrown back in the waves of his own climax, his hand coming down on the base of
Severus spine, seeming to affect him like a switch, the loud moans against her
pussy and the way he undulated suddenly indicating that he too had found his
satisfaction.�

She felt herself tip and plunge and plunge into a feeling unlike anything
before.� It verged on pain it was so strong.�

She felt distant from herself, dimly aware of her hands clenched in Severus
hair, clamping his face to her as she bucked and rubbed against him.� Her scream was eardrum shattering.�

As the strength flowed out of her
limbs in the wake of the pleasure she panted, falling back limply from the taut
curl her body had squeezed itself into.��

She felt Severus climbing up her body weakly, kissing her here and there till
he could cast himself down beside her, his arm thrown over her, one leg curled
around hers.�

He watched her silently,
recovering his own breath.� His
fingertips stroked at the skin of her ribs gently every so often.�

The light scratch of a scourgify
swept over them both and they flinched in their vulnerable state.� �

Severus closed his eyes and pressed his face against her arm with an expression
of reluctance, even dread.�

His arm around her tensed marginally.

�Severus.� Stay with her.� I must make arrangements.� Hermione will take the mark tonight. It will be ..in essence..much as I
originally intended.� You will prepare
her for the role i wish her to play.��

Severus winced slightly.� He half turned, his eyes lowered �..Master.. pl-�

She looked up at Voldemort, standing, already fully robed, at the foot of the
bed, his face was closed, resolute. �

He interrupted brusquely

�No Severus. �It must be this way.� There can be no hesitation.� I will not stand for insurrection within my
ranks.� Hermione�s heritage is too well
known - She must stand the trials and prove herself worthy in their eyes or
there will be ..doubt.��

He walked around the bed and came
to her, lowering himself to his haunches and facing her at eye level.�

�If I am ..truly..
your Lord, as you claim, you will be strong�.� He murmured, his
eyes steely.�

He swept her damp hair away from her face with cool slender fingertips.� Leaning forward he brushed a kiss over her
cheekbone.�

She was not comforted by the
gravitas of both men.�

She had thought taking the mark meant she would kneel and the Dark Lord would
press his wand to her arm and perhaps it might hurt a bit but then it would all
be over.�

That seemed insufficient to warrant this degree of solemnity.

She stared back into the red
jewels silently.� After a time he
appeared to sigh and stood, turning away slightly.�

�Watch her.� Do not
leave her side, Severus.� Not even for a
second.� Perhaps she can help you in the
lab, as I had originally hoped.� I�m sure
your little lab rats are chomping at the bit by now, so to speak.��

�No mistakes Severus.��

He swiped his wand impatiently
across his face, his features dissolving into the snakelike face of Lord Voldemort,
then glanced back down at her briefly, his face familiar and unfamiliar at
once, and turned on the spot, disapparating.��

The moment he was gone, Severus
buried his face against her arm and pulled at her. Bemused she turned on her
side, wrapping her arms around him and pulling him close.�

As if pricked into life he dragged her hard against his body, clinging to her. �

He breathed deeply a few times into her shoulder before pulling back and
looking into her face

�You will be fine� he said
reassuringly.� She wasn�t sure whether he
was talking to her or himself.� She
nodded blankly.�

�The..trials...
are similar to what you experienced with Lucius.� You will
withstand them.��

His youthful face skewed with�
something like fear and aversion.�

�I.. can�t stop it.�
You must find it in yourself
to endure whatever happens.�� I.. said I would protect you from anyone.. but.. but.. I..�

She kissed him gently.� �It�s ok� she whispered.� �It will be ok.� Its just pain.� And
embarrassment too I suppose.�

It will be horrible I expect but...� ...it
wasn�t Lucius� cruelty that broke me.�

He jerked, shocked and appeared to
shatter.� His eyes were dark holes.�

�Hermione..�
he choked out.. �Please.. I�m..�
she shook her head.�

�It�s alright Severus.� I understand I think.� He.. he explained some
things to me. ��

Her young former professor looked
at her afraid and disbelieving.� �I�m
sorry� he breathed.� �It wasn�t
true.�

It.. I thought you wanted that from me.� I never..��

Her eyebrows furrowed.� �What wasn�t true?� Severus.�
What are you talking about?!� He ducked his head, avoiding her gaze.� A pale sullen boy with wide tear filled
eyes.� She tried to remind herself that
this was professor Snape.� It was so hard
to think of them as the same person.�

�I ...lied..� I never did those things to you.� It was a lie.� A story..�

You ..you liked it..last
time.. you desired me.�
I wanted you to look at me like that again.� And I wanted to fix what Lucius
had done.��

�If I could make it like the
stories in the bath.. just
something happening to you, exciting you.�
I thought..�

I.. I thought you would convert the pain into pleasure.� It seemed like a good idea.��

I didn�t realise until it was over that it hadn�t worked that way and then you
were so..broken...�

and I couldn�t undo it.. you went further and further
away.��

�I didn�t want to leave you.� I thought if I held you..
you�d come back and it would be alright. �

But you..� you didn�t want me there.�
You didn�t respond.� It was making
everything worse.� So I left you
there.� I covered you up. I thought if you
slept.. if I left you alone
for a while.. you�d be fine.� But you weren�t.� You didnt come
back.� and
nothing I did..�� His words were
interrupted as his face crumpled and she watched him gulping breaths as tears
poured down his cheeks.�

He sobbed messily, pulling her close and burying his face in her curls.� �Her mio..nee.� he wailed through the wet sniffs and gulps.�

She stroked his smooth back gently
over and over and tried to process this.. It hadn�t
happened?� But he knew things about her
room, about how she slept. Was he lying now?� What the hell?!�

After minutes of distraught
weeping and crushing her to him like a teddy bear he seemed to calm down
somewhat.�

She brushed her hands over his hair, stroking him soothingly.�

�What really happened, Severus?�
she murmured into his ear.��

He wiped his face against her neck
wetly, pulling in a ragged breath.� After
a minute or so of trying to control his breathing sufficiently to speak with
composure again he said lowly, against her skin.� �I.. would watch you.� Watch over you mainly. �Those reckless dunderheaded wastrels you
called friends were constantly dragging you into danger.� I knew there was nothing I could do to keep
you from trailing after them everywhere.��

�I..I..would
merely look upon you in the halls.. or in the
classroom sometimes when I felt I would not be noticed.� I..��

He turned his face away from her neck.� �I..wanted you.� I�m
sorry.� I tried to ignore it.� But you
were.. you are..SO
beautiful..so brilliant..and
..and good.� You are too good.� Too good for me.� I knew my feelings were wrong.� He
gulped.�� He pulled away from her slowly
to lay on his back. �She let him go and lay on her side watching
him patiently.�

He wrapped his arms over his eyes as if he couldn�t face looking at her.�

After a minute during which his
young thin lipped mouth twisted and trembled he continued.� �I would take girls at the revels and imagine
they were you.� I..hated that you made me weak.� Weakness is the only truly unforgiveable
trait here.� One day you had been..�� he paused and
pursed his lips, remembering ruefully

�It was the day that you threw Longbottom out of the
way after Draco had dropped billywig stings into his
calming draught.��

�Well.. I call
it a calming draught.� He had used
powdered asphodel rather than ash.� A
rather messy and painful poison when combined with the other ingredients of the
calming draught at brewing stage two.� Billywig stings of course react violently with asphodel, as
you obviously well-realized to have
reacted so quickly.��

�I was so ..angry.. with you
as I levitated you to the infirmary.� To risk yourself... for longbottom.�

Was there ever a more useless boy?!��

�You were unresponsive.� In shock.� Burnt.� Your face and ..and ..� It doesn�t matter.� It was superficial.� I knew you would recover in a couple of hours
when you had re-grown the skin.� I had
poured oil of Agamenthra over you only moments after
it happened so you were spared the bleeding soporating
sores you would otherwise have suffered.�

But I was so ..angry
that you would throw yourself away like that.�
So thoughtlessly, automatically.�

Unlike Longbottom - you knew what the brew would do to you, knew it would permanently scar you, and you did it anyway!� Why?�

To spare that worthless, stuttering, stain of a child undue discomfort?�

It would have taught him to pay closer attention to directions.� He would have had a good long time to ponder
exactly where his error lay as I certainly wouldn�t have thrown away such an
expensive ingredient as that ungent upon his hide.�

It was the last of my oil too! I had to wait for an entire month for new
supplies to come in.��

She couldn�t see his eyes but the
lower half of his face suggested that he was scowling fiercely as he slipped
back into his ire of that day. �

�So I decided to take out my
aggravation upon your likeness.� I had
never.. I had never dared to do so previously.�

I tore a few hairs from your head as you lay sleeping in the infirmary and
later that night.. when the
revel was in full swing and I had selected a suitably innocent muggle girl from
the evening�s offerings..�

He turned his head away from her, tightening his arms over his face slightly

�I imperio�d her and made her drink the polyjuice.� I
released the curse and..� and it was you..cowering before me.� Terrified.� Lovely. ��

But it wasn�t you..� I didn�t have to worry what you might think
of me later or whether you would remember,�

whether you would ..forgive me.� I could do.. anything i desired to you.��

�The girl was panicking - �begging..pleading with me not to hurt her. �She didnt understand
what was happening � the polyjuice, the Death Eaters.� Her voice was wrong and it spoiled the effect
so i silencio�d her.� He
stilled.�

She swallowed, trying not to show
her disgust.� He was just like Lucius.� He hurt muggles..for fun.� Without
remorse.. just because he felt
like it.� He really was..
a Death Eater.�
Like Voldemort had told her.� She
hadn�t really believed it.�

She wanted to believe he was a double agent and had had to do some things from
time to time to keep up appearances and fool Voldemort but clearly that wasn�t
the case.�

He did it because he enjoyed it.� He had
always been a Death Eater and he had been instrumental in killing Harry.� Somehow the thought of Harry�s death didn�t
quite upset her as much anymore as she thought it should.�

She should be sickened.� She should have
at least tried to fight.. or
to free the order members who still lived..

or at least to run away.�

She could have done so after Voldemort
took off her necklace but she was so preoccupied with this perverse little
tryst with these..evil..bloody men..

Her thoughts were interrupted
because the �evil man� or boy.. lying
naked beside her abruptly turned and�
wrapped his arms around her again, pulling her against him like a limp
doll.� He held her as if he were afraid
she might fade away any second.�

She hung indecisively on the brink
of fighting and pushing him away but he started speaking again.�

His voice was muffled against her
hair and her shoulder.� �After I had... after... �afterward � I apparated to Hogwarts.� It was early in the morning.� I was half drunk.. drunk enough for it to seem a good idea, but not drunk
enough to prevent myself carrying it out.�

I thought.. I thought I�d go up to your room and do
what I told you in the bath I�d done.�

I didn�t want a copy of you.. I wanted you.��

Hermione stiffened somewhat and
her upper lip curled slightly in disgust but Severus, unable to see, continued
on speaking into her neck. �

�It took me a lot of effort to
break the detection wards on the common room � although heads of house can
enter all of the common rooms, a head of a different house entering sends an
alarm to the head of that house.�� I
couldn�t have that.� How would I explain
it?� Albus would never have believed
me.�

After I was in, it took me even longer to subdue the ward on the stairs.� I suppose the founders expected that young
hormonal boys would be more persistent ward crackers than invading heads of
houses.��

She shivered.� It was getting cold.� Or maybe it was just the topic.� She wanted to be dressed.� She was uncomfortably aware of Severus smooth
chest pressed against her.� His silky long hair tickling her collarbone.

�When I finally stood before your
bed.. and saw you..�� he gulped.� She could feel his throat move.�

�You were lying there.. Michelsons tetradic
computations in arithmancy lying open on your chest.� You had clearly fallen asleep studying.� An apple core lay on the bedside table, brown
with oxidation.�

Your leg was hanging out of bed and you wore massive woolly orange socks.� You were..stunning..�

You took my breath away.�

I could not move.�

I stood and I watched you sleep, just watched the rise and fall of your chest
for over an hour.��

�Then you turned over and the book
started to slide off you.� I was afraid
it would hit the floor and wake you.. or wake someone else.�
I summoned it and put it away in the empty slot in the bookcase without
thinking.� I wanted..so
badly.. to touch you.�
But I didnt dare.� Never before had I been more completely aware
of my utter unworthiness to breathe the same air as you.�

I suddenly started to grow afraid that someone would wake and find me there and
Albus would do something to prevent me seeing you again.� I needed to see you.� Even if it was only at breakfast watching you
laugh with Potter.�� I left.�

I.. I never went back.��

Hermione pulled back, rolling onto
her back and staring at the ceiling, trying to work out how she felt about this
new information.� Her professor was a
sadistic bastard.� Unfortunately.�

He was also probably actually in love
with her.�

How often had she wished for
this?�

To be completely fair she had also fantasized about the sadistic bastard part.. but in less extreme terms.�

Perhaps a little detention fantasy or a bit of intimidation
against a wall in dark corridors.�
Not.. actual torture..or uh.. murder or anything.�

Severus lay on his side, not
trying to touch her, his dark eyes were fearful.� He whispered, continuing.

�and then.. at the Victory
ball.. you were there.�
..Here.� And I was afraid the Dark
Lord would kill you, simply because of who you are.� Even more so if he knew how
i felt about you.�

And when I realised he..wanted..you..�

I thought you would be lost to me forever.�
Worse.. that I would
watch you succumb to him.� I would lose
you.. and..and
I would lose him too.� I love him, Hermione!� I know that you are disgusted at the things
I�ve done.. the things he has done..and will continue to do.. There is
nothing I would not do to protect him.��

She turned to look at him.� He didn�t look like himself at all.� It wasn�t just the face..
although that only emphasised the change.� It was the raw vulnerability.�

Professor Snape was never..ever..vulnerable.� Never wide open like this
slender youth.� ��

She could not bring herself to say anything that might shatter his fragility at
this moment.�

She leaned forward and pressed her lips to his, stilling him.�

�Everything will be ok� she
mumbled against his mouth.�

His hair was so silky and long.
She let her fingers play in it.� It was
as if he were a different person.� Not
the man she had a certain impression of as her severe professor buttoned to the
throat and protected by leather and dragonhide but a
boy.� Surely it was wrong to think
that.� This was professor Snape, no
matter how he appeared.�

But it was very hard to see him in this face, especially as he was acting
now.�

As if he suddenly became aware of
himself, the face of the boy lying curled against her became shuttered.

�Yes.� He agreed neutrally.�

He seemed to sigh slightly.� �We should rise.� There are several things I must do in the lab
before this evening.� Come.��

He turned away and sat up, stretching slender legs over the edge of the bed and
standing, unabashed in his nakedness.�

She admired his form.� Still broad shouldered but less thickly
muscled than he had been in his older body.��

He turned and observed her eyes taking him in.�
His posture shifted slightly in the awareness but he did not shy away or
attempt to draw his shoulders back.��

She got to her hands and knees and
crawled to the edge of the bed near him.�

When she was standing next to him,
he reached for his wand on the bedside table and drew her close, apparating
them into her bedroom.�

�

Author note.

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Precious Mudblood