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Coming of Age (Female Potter)	By : stargazer67 Category: HP Canon Characters paired with Original Characters > Het - Male/Female Views: 11694 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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When he comes to her that night, they don’t even make it upstairs. She complains in frustration at the number of buttons on his clothes, and he gives her a small grin and pulls out his wand, uttering a spell that undoes them all at once.
She runs her hands and eyes over his body, in a way that only yesterday he could not even fantasize about her doing while awake, and he can’t wait and leads her to the couch. He slides into her while alternating between kissing her hungrily and licking her nipples feverishly, almost as if he’s afraid she’s going to disappear out from under him at any moment, and he wants to get as much as he can before she does. Fortunately her urgency is no less, she’s been thinking about the previous night all day herself, and she climaxes quickly and he soon after.
Once they can both breathe again, they can’t seem to help smiling at one another, both somewhat amused by their shared impatience. She never realized that he could have such an engaging smile; and he never imagined he could ever have anything much to smile about. He shifts over and wraps his arms around her, glad that the couch is at least deep enough to accommodate both of them comfortably.
She traces the smile on his lips with her finger, and he says, “I hope you know how much of a problem that is causing me.”
She laughs and gives him a very impish look, saying, “Why, is smiling making your face sore? After all, those particular muscles can’t have seen very much use over the past decade or so…”
He gives her a mock glare (that he can’t quite hold) and says, “No, but I have found myself smiling at my own thoughts several times today, and I am afraid I’m going to do it where someone else can see it, and then be at a complete loss as to how to explain it. Dumbledore and Phineas already have caught me at it in the office today.” They both had teased him about it a bit also, of course; as well as cautioning him about masking his features better.
“You’re right, I’m sorry – I shouldn’t make fun, I can see that being a problem, potentially a bad problem.”
He pulls her closer and says, “It’s nothing I can’t overcome, just that it's nothing I've really ever needed to try to overcome. I am not sorry to have had a reason to be presented with this particular challenge, though.”
He caresses her face and then follows the lines of her body, with a touch that is both firm and at the same time gentle. He follows the movement of his hand with his eyes, almost like he’s memorizing every contour, every hollow, learning it with both hand and eye so that he can reproduce it at will for himself later; almost as if he were a sculptor, who knew he would sometimes have to work with no model in front of him.
There is something sensually possessive about it, as though he is staking his claim to every inch of her, and Evie finds it very arousing. When his hand and eyes make it back to her face, he pulls her to him for a deep, slow kiss; and she moves on top of him, sliding him into her when she feels his renewed erection. He again just watches her for awhile as she makes love to him, enjoying watching her desire build to a peak and then fall over it as she controls the pace.
She climbs off of him after her climax, and takes his hand to pull him up as well, changing places with him. He kneels between her legs but doesn’t re-enter her right away; instead taking the time to follow many of the lines his hands had traced with his mouth this time; again as though he’s both learning them, and claiming them.
When he does finally penetrate her again, she can see a possessive look in his eyes when they meet hers as well. He thrusts slowly and deeply, and the desire and acceptance of him that he sees in her face and eyes are eventually enough to bring him to another climax without needing to increase the pace.
Sated again for now, Evie suggests that the bed would actually be more comfortable, and Severus has to agree; they gather up their discarded clothes and make their way upstairs. Once in bed, they settle comfortably, just caressing one another without needing to talk.
After a long while, Severus rolls onto his side and looks Evie in the eyes, touching her face and telling her that he is glad that she gave him another chance; he missed her terribly while they were apart as it was, but it would have been infinitely worse to have missed this as well. Evie blushes and smiles, but has to agree.
He asks, “What did Dumbledore say to you, that made you not just throw away the flask when I sent it? He never told me, just said that he’d already made sure you would have to look at what I’d sent.” Snape doesn’t really care what the answer is, he’s basically just opening the door for her to ask about the memories he gave her, if she wants to. He appreciates that she didn’t say anything about them immediately afterwards, being sensitive to how raw he’d have been from sharing them.
“He told me the day we went to retrieve the Horcrux from the cave, that sometime in the future you’d want to talk to me, and that I’d know when the time came. He said that I had to promise to hear you out completely no matter what. I was completely confused at the time, I could not imagine what would ever make me not want to talk to you at that point.” He smiles at that and she smiles back, and goes on, “But he was insistent, saying that he might be a sentimental old fool but he wanted me to promise, so I did. He also said you cared about me.”
He caresses her face again and looks deeply into her eyes and says, “I did. And I do.”
This sends a thrill up her spine and she kisses him softly. She thinks for a moment whether there’s anything else she wants to ask about (having understood the tacit permission he'd given about the rest, in asking her that question); but decides that there really isn’t. The memories of her mother especially were quite complete, she has no questions about any of that and it explained so much (about him, about his actions/reactions towards her and others, about why his loyalties changed).
Finally she does think of two things she’d like to say – one for herself, and one basically for the entire wizarding world. Looking into his eyes, she says, “Thank you for all the times you watched over me and protected me, when I didn’t even know that you were.”
He starts to say something, but she puts a finger to his lips and goes on, “But even more, thank you for being willing to carry out Dumbledore’s last wish, especially knowing what it was going to cost you in so many different ways, and what it’s still costing you now. I think a lot of people would thank you if they knew the truth; but since they don’t and can’t, I will say it for them as well as for myself.”
This hits him in a spot he didn’t even know was vulnerable, and tears spring to his eyes. He cannot speak, he just buries his face in the hollow of her neck and holds her tightly. She can feel him sobbing silently and holds him without saying anything, knowing that it is an outpouring of multiple things; his own grief (that he probably hasn’t had any chance to release before now) over losing Dumbledore as well as having had to be the one to take his life, and being deeply touched by her understanding of why he had to do it, and what it cost him.
He knew only that he had no choice about doing it; he certainly never expected anyone to ever thank him for it. In fact, if not for needing to explain to her (because he wanted her back in his life), he probably would never have told anyone why he’d done it, even once Voldemort was defeated and he would have been free to.
It just wasn’t in his nature, and he has to admit that it likely would have served his purposes just fine to keep everyone just that much farther away, for not having known the truth. He’s not sure even now that he does want anyone else to know, later; but he figures it’s not something he needs to decide right now anyway. But having one person know, understand, and accept it so fully, even when it hurt her so deeply at the time (for itself and for the perception of his betrayal of her as well as Dumbledore) is a healing balm to his soul that he never even realized he needed, or would ever need.
Finally he pulls away and looks into her eyes, telling her without words how deeply she has touched him. He leans in and kisses her very gently, losing himself in her and completely unafraid of letting it happen. They make love again, and this time he almost doesn’t notice any individual thing that happened along the way, so joined are they this time emotionally as well as physically. He holds her for a long time afterwards, then finally kisses her and says he needs to get back, before he falls asleep here and doesn't show up for breakfast at Hogwarts.
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- 20
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Coming of Age (Female Potter)