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Marvin the Mad Muggle	By : AuctorRubra Category: Harry Potter > General > General Views: 1883 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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Disclaimer: It�s not mine! *sob* Harry, all of his
friends, and the entirety of Potterverse all belong to J.K. Rowling and I swear
that I�m not making any money off of it. BUT�Marvin is mine, mine, mine and if
you touch him I will hex you into oblivion!

A/N: I just wanted to say thank you to mysticsong for
giving me my very first review EVER! Now that I know someone is reading and
waiting for more it will be a lot easier to trudge along. Don�t worry
mysticsong, I don�t plan on giving this one up. I have plans for our
unsuspecting muggle. Mmmmwaaaahahahahahahaha! Also note that I made a change
to the first chapter (just a small one). Harry originally mentions through his
thoughts that Voldemort had been defeated four years earlier. I amended that
to be seven years earlier.

Auctor Rubra

Chapter 2: WHAT!!

Severus Snape stormed through the
corridors of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. He secretly wished
that the summer holidays were over so that he could gain some small amount of
satisfaction from the fear that would light up in the eyes of the students when
they saw him in such a rage. He should have known better. Every time he
ventured into muggle London he learned one more thing that only served to anger
him further, or as Potter was prone to saying, �twist the stick a bit further
up his arse�. Severus snorted. Albus� little Golden Boy was still as clueless
as ever as far as he was concerned. Worthless brat figured that he knows it
all just because he brought down the Dark Lord.

When he came to the gargoyle
guarding the entrance to the Headmaster�s office, he shouted the password.
�Pepper Imps!�

Clutching a muggle newspaper a bit
tighter in his hand, he rushed up the stone steps and into the old meddler�s
office without knocking. �Albus, this is outrageous! Why haven�t they put a
stop to this nonsense yet?�

Albus looked up with an especially
bright twinkle in his eye and Severus had to forcefully keep himself from
flinching. Damn, that twinkle was never a good sign. �Now, Severus my boy, I
know you were against Pomona�s request for flower beds to be arranged along the
road to Hogsmeade in house colors, but both she and I hoped that with the
proper amount of leafy foliage added you wouldn�t feel that your own house was
being slighted.�

�No, you great bumbling�ARGH!!�
Severus dragged a pale hand down his face in frustration and thrust the paper
before Albus� eyes. �THIS!! That infernal Rowling woman is releasing another
book.�

The old wizard before Severus
cleared his throat, the twinkle growing even brighter. �Well, yes Severus it
is a seven part series if I remember correctly. It wouldn�t bode well for
young Jo�s career is she left her readers hanging.�

�Oh no you, don�t,� Severus
snapped. �I will not let you try and talk me down just because she was a
Gryffindor. I thought they were supposed to be the honorable ones. I always
knew that a Gryffindor would be the death of me if not our entire way of life�I
just thought it would be Potter.�

�Severus, what�s really troubling
you? The Ministry of Magic has been able to keep things under control thus
far,� Albus said with a gentle smile.

�The woman is a liar and she
embellishes wherever she isn�t certain of the truth,� Snape muttered.

The Headmaster chuckled and
Severus went rigid. �Are you sure this doesn�t have something to do with the
less-than-favorable light Jo casts upon you?�

Severus snorted. �As if I care
what that sorry excuse for an I-Only-Scrapped-Up-An-A-In-N.E.W.T.-Potions witch
thinks of me. Snarky, greasy git. Ha! And I do not resemble an overgrown
ba�� Severus snapped his mouth shut once he realized he was whining.

�I don�t think those descriptions
are what really bother you. I think it�s her subtle suggestions that deep,
down inside you might really be a wonderful person.� The Headmaster chuckled
again.

�I have no idea what you are
talking about,� Snape said silkily. Keep laughing you old coot and I�ll
shove you bowl of lemon drops up your�

�As far as her sixth book goes,�
Albus said as he offered Severus a lemon drop. �We will just have to hope that
things will remain calm. She has fans in the wizarding world as well and they
are adamant that Jo be allowed to continue her work.�

Severus scowled and snatched his
newspaper back off the Headmaster�s desk. �I don�t suppose that you being one
of those fans has anything to do with the fact that the ministry has yet to
stop her?�

�Yes, well she does do fantastic
work.� Albus was stroking his long, white beard with a smile as he popped a
lemon drop into his mouth. �There�s nothing you can do to stop it.�

�We shall see,� Severus hissed and
spun about to leave the office. �You haven�t heard the last of this, Albus.�

�One more thing, my boy,� Albus
called.

Bloody hell! I forgot about
the twinkle. Now I�m doomed. �Yes, headmaster?�

�I have someone who needs a bit of
help��

Not Potter. Not Potter. Not
Potter.

�It seems Harry got into a bit of
a jam last night��

NO! Argh!!! Damned
Boy-Who-Lived-To-Make-My-Life-A-Living-Hell!

�It seems that a rather interesting
individual came to Harry�s aid�

Interesting, what does that
mean? Is this the part where he shoves some crazed half-breed child into my
care?

�Harry really doesn�t want to send
him away. He so happy here and Harry feels that he owes him his life. Apparently
the young man is very excited to meet you��

no �It�it can�t be. Please,
dear Gods NO!!

�He�s a very nice muggle and he
will be remaining here until further notice.�

Severus whirled about to face the
Headmaster, his robes billowing about him. �WHAT!!�

A/N: Sorry that this one�s a bit short. Next one
will be longer, I promise!
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Marvin the Mad Muggle