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Juxtapose Rapture	By : ladysinistra Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Harry/Draco Views: 1431 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

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Juxtapose Rapture

Written By: Lady Sinistra

Rating: NC-17

Pairing: Harry/Draco

Warning(s): sexual situations, angst, reference to death and
self-mutilation, slash/yaoi

Genre(s): angst, drama, romance, songfic,
one-shot

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do I own the song
�Missing�. Those are property of J.K. Rowling and Evanescence, respectively.

Summary: Dark songfic. For Harry, love
and pain were juxtapose feelings� Given time both
created feelings of rapture. HP/DM

Author�s note: This story came to my mind late one night while I
was reading a rather angsty Harry/Draco fiction.
There is light at the end of the tunnel, but I warn you: it�s a rather long
tunnel� But don�t let it shy you away from this or the rest of my stories. I
just had to get this one out of my system.

**********************************************

The final two weeks of Harry�s sixth
year flew by, every night finding him in that same bathroom, sitting on the floor
of that same stall with his knife in his hand and his blood pouring onto the
concrete beneath. Ron had begun to notice that Harry would disappear every
night, but never said a word. It was his belief that Harry was a big boy now,
and if he had a problem he�d come to him or Hermione when he was read to. Or,
at least, that�s what he told Hermione when she approached him about it.

Harry had confided in his friends that he planned to sing at the
Ball, and that he wouldn�t be joining them. It saddened them both a little to
know their best friend wouldn�t be there with them and told him so, him
responding with a simple �You two have each other, you�ll be fine.� When they
questioned him about what he was singing, and why or to whom, he told them
they�d have to wait like everyone else.

The evening of the Ball came, and Harry found himself standing in
the boys� bathroom before the mirror, staring back at his now unrecognizable
reflection. His glasses were gone, replaced with temporary contacts given to
him by Madame Pompfry to use until she had the time
to correct his vision magically. His eyes were lined with kohl; making them
stand out and the emerald of his irises look startling bright. His dress robes
matched the kohl that lined his eyes with the Black and Potter family crests
monogrammed over his heart. His dress pants matched his robes and his shirt was
a soft gray short-sleeved crushed velvet that reminded
him of Draco, clinging to his well-trimmed body.

He ran his hand through his mess locks, giving him a �just snogged� look that suited him well. Well, this is it� No
turning back now�Harry thought with a sigh as he grabbed his knife, sliding
it into his pocket as he turned and walked out of the bathroom and down the
stairs to the common room.

He was greeted with shocked gasps of awe and wonder. No one in
Gryffindor had ever thought that Harry, the Boy-Who-Lived, the Gryffindor
Golden Boy, had such a dark side to him. Harry did his best not to look at his
housemates as he walked down the stairwell and crossed the common room to �his�
seat near the fireplace.

�Harry� Is that really you, mate?� Ron asked, his deep brown dress
robe billowing slightly as he walked.

�Yeah, of course it is Ron. Why? Do I really look that different?�
Harry asked, already knowing he looked very different.

�Well, yes. Neither of us ever really noticed how different you
look without glasses�� Hermione answered, her hand wrapped in Ron�s.

Harry just nodded and got up, making for the portrait hole. He
looked back at Ron and Hermione. �Have fun you two, you�ll see me soon enough��

They nodded, and Harry stepped through the portrait hole and out into the hallway. He took his time getting to
the Great Hall, taking a longer route he�d discovered with the Marauder�s Map
sometime ago. He could hear people talking happily, peals of laughter
fluttering in the air as he got closer to the Hall, and the huge party that
awaited him within.

As Harry reached the doorway, so did another sixth year student.
One with white-blonde hair and silver eyes that haunted Harry day and night
that was dressed in the most beautiful crimson dress robes Harry had ever laid
his eyes one. Harry froze at the sight before him.

Draco Malfoy, Harry�s
rival and the object of his affection.

�Good evening, Potter� You know that is a rather nice outfit.
Black suits you well. As does that gray.� Draco commented lightly as he walked
up and opened the door.

�Um� Uh, t-thanks Malfoy� That crimson
is a wonderful color for you, by the way.� Harry muttered, snapping out of his daze as he stammered and blushed like a first year with a
crush.

�Thank you�� Draco replied with a smile as he held the door open.
�I see I�m not the only one of us who decided to put this stupid rivalry behind
him� After you.�

�No, it seems you�re not�� Harry nodded and walked through the
door with a small smile towards Draco. Perhaps�
He thought, tonight will go better then I had
hoped�

**********************************************

Laughter, music, and joyful conversation rang throughout the Great
Hall. Seamus Finnigan and Dean Thomas had snuck Firewhisky into the Ball with them and spiked the pumpkin
juice. Needless to say, many people were either drunk or well on their way to
being so. Snape had been doing nothing but brooding
and drinking glass after glass of pumpkin juice for the first hour of the Ball,
and was now thoroughly smashed and hitting on the school�s newest DADA teacher,
Professor Areiana Black (who also happened to be Severus� school boy crush
during his time at Hogwarts as a student and Sirius� sister).

Harry laughed for the first time in months as he watch the antics of his drunken professor and Godfather�s
sister. It was all rather funny to him, watching her try to avoid him the whole
night. Almost as funny as watching the Headmaster ask Professor McGonagall to dance
and seeing her turn as red as the Gryffindor banner that hung from the ceiling.

A few more songs went by, the last of them a slower one meant for
the couples. He saw Ron and Hermione together and half-smiled; he was happy
they had found each other before the war� At the end of the song, Dumbledore
glanced at Harry and winked, Harry taking that as his cue to take the stage.

Dumbledore brought his wand to his throat and said �Sonorus!� and then walked up onto the stage to
speak.

�Dear students, welcome to the end of another year at Hogwarts!�
Many students, and professors, broke into applause and cheers at this. �It has
been yet another interesting year and what better way to end it then in a very�
interesting way. We have a student that wishes to perform for us. It�s a
dedication, but to whom he will not allow me to say. I wish to see� who can
figure this out� But, now I give to you, Hogwarts � Harry Potter.�

Harry took center stage as he saw Dumbledore raise his wand back
to his throat and mutter �Quietus� to bring his voice back to normal.
The band that was there as a favor to the Headmaster made room for Harry,
wishing him luck as he walked up to the magical microphone.

As Harry took the stage, the entire Hall had gone silent. Harry
Potter? A singer? No one had ever thought he did
anything other then Quidditch�
And his clothes! No one would have guessed that the Gryffindor Golden Boy was
that sexy, especially in black. They stood there in silent awe. Hermione and
Ron sat together, waiting to hear their best friend sing, something they�d
heard once before by accident, the pure emotion in his voice bring tears to
their eyes.

�Hello,� He started. �I know all of you know who I am. I will be
singing a song by an underground wizarding band that
has hit it big in the muggle world. Its called �Missing� and this is
for someone special� Though, they don�t know it yet. I wanted to do this before
the War begins� Before I must do what so many of you know I must.�

Harry looked over his shoulder to tell the band they could start
playing. He heard the chilling melody start and let himself become lost in the
music, his eyes closing slowly.

Please, please forgive me

But I won't be home again

Maybe someday you'll look up

And, barely conscious, you'll say to no one:

"Isn't something missing?"

You won't cry for my absence, I know

You forgot me long ago

And am I that unimportant?

And am I so insignificant?

Isn't something missing?

Isn't someone missing me?

Harry held onto the microphone with both of his hands as if he
needed an anchor. As the next verse of the song started his eyes flew open, the
emerald depths holding more emotion in them in that moment then they had in
months. Hermione and Ron both gasped, seeing the fire in Harry�s
eyes that had been lost since the day Sirius died.

Even though I'm the sacrifice

You won't try for me, not now

Though I'd die to know you love me

I'm all alone

Isn't someone missing me?

His eyes quickly locked with the silver ones belonging to who this
was all over: Draco Malfoy. Draco seemed entranced my
Harry�s voice his eyes boring into Harry�s. He let the words sink into him, understanding that
they were meant for him and him alone. He clutched his chest, the words sending
a lancing pain across his heart.

Please, please forgive me

But I won't be home again

I know what you do to yourself

I breathe deep and cry out

Isn't something missing?

Isn't someone missing me?

Even though I'm the sacrifice

You won't try for me, not now

Though I'd die to know you love me

I'm all alone

Isn't someone missing me?

Harry let all the feelings he had for Draco pour into his voice,
the raw emotion bringing many in the room to tears. Pansy let out a small sob
next to Draco, but he couldn�t bring himself to look at her, to ask if she was
all right. Tears were falling from his own eyes as his feet took him to closer
and closer to the stage of their own accord. As Draco moved closer, Harry
pointed at his as he began the next verse, showing to the world just who it was
the song was for.

And if I bleed, I'll bleed

Knowing you don't care

And if I sleep

Just to dream of you

I'll wake without you there

Isn't something missing?

Isn't something...

Harry brought his hand back to the microphone, tears falling from
his own eyes, leaving streaks of kohl in their wake.

Even though I'm the sacrifice

You won't try for me, not now

Though I'd die to know you love me

I'm all alone

Isn't something missing?

Isn't someone missing me?

The music ended and there was silence throughout the entire Hall.
Everyone was still in shock from the pure emotion that had just come from the
Boy-Who-Lived. Suddenly, as Harry stood on the stage still clinging to the
microphone and trying not to collapse, the entire Hall broke into applause.
Harry gave the crowd a shaky smile before his knees gave out. Draco gasped and
sprinted the short distance left to the stage and caught Harry as he collapsed.
Hermione jumped up out of Ron�s lap and took his hand, the two of them running
for the stage.

**********************************************

Ok, so if you�ve read book 7 then you know something about Snape isn�t right but I don�t care because this is my story,
haha. I really hope you guys are enjoying this� If
you are, I�d like to hear from you J
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Juxtapose Rapture