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When the Mind Breaks	By : Schwertlilie Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Harry/Snape Views: 5123 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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I�m not very nice to Harry am I? Well, there be some angst on the horizon.

Sharp pain in his lower back has Remus grunting awake. Someone as old as him shouldn�t be sleeping on couches. Remembering exactly why they are on the couch, his stomach clenches as he realizes there�s no warm body pressed against him. Flicking open his eyes, Harry is no where to be seen. Looking to the left he sees only the form of his slightly drooling lover. Rolling his eyes he smacks the other across the back of his head.

� Oi! You could wake a bloke nicer than that!� Remus pushes against him, ignoring the complaint of a grumpy Sirius.

� Do you know where Harry is?� He asks urgently. This brings the other to full attention once again. Looking at each other the same thought crosses both their minds. Untangling from the blankets and sunken cushions they begin a dash around the house calling out for Harry. After checking their designated sides of the house, they meet in the front hall panting and shaking their heads. The creak of the front door has both men turning, staring at the light shinning in through the open crack. As one they reach for the knob and step into the morning.

Blinking, they�re forced to take in the first rays of dawn spreading through the valley. When they�d first bought the house they�d taken down the railing separating the sprawling deck from the lawn, giving it a welcoming quality. From anywhere on the porch you could see down the small hill, covered in only a few trees and to the horizon softened by fields, small mountains and valleys. Every morning the sun would make it�s way up, birthing right in front of their home.

Its here they find Harry, gazing out at the rising sun dressed in pink and golden clouds, a blue tint hazing just above it, marinating lilac and lavender in the mix. Scattered in front of the boy are open tubes of Life Paint. He always left some in the extra bedroom just in case inspiration struck him, but he had no brushes with him. For a substitute, judging from the multi colors staining his clothes and skin, he�d used his hands and arms instead. But it�s not the boy the two men are left, mouths agape, to look at.

It�s the painted canvas sprawled in front of Harry, one of the larger 6 by 9 feet. What had started as a bleak white field, Harry turned into a blazing landscape of lustrous colors. They were all there; Sirius, Remus, Ron, Hermoine, Dumbledore, Tom Riddle, James, Lily, The Dursleys, Draco�.Severus�and so many more that had touched Harry�s life. The bodies and faces were moving in a continuous swirl and neither man can focus properly on one person before they are gone, only feel them in turn. When each man sees himself they can feel stronger emotions than from all others. Harry�s feelings for them. All the people seem to be dancing in a sky that mirrors the sunrise in reality. The only figure that remains still and constant in the flow of images and the river of emotions is the naked form of Harry, his expression one of untainted pleasure. They look, as one, into his endless green eyes,

A sudden wave of sensation has both men trembling, hands instinctively reaching for each other. The feeling around them is familiar, but magnified to proportions neither thinks they can endure. Soon it ebbs back, turning to a dull throb.

� It feels so sad.� The steady voice has Remus and Sirius forgetting the painting just as fast as they had become ensnared inside it. His godfather takes a step forward, but neither seems able to move further.

� What is Harry?� Remus tries and the sitting figure turns to them. Whatever they had been expecting they�d never thought they�d find Harry�s demeanor overwhelmingly calm. But the air around them is stale with unease, something isn�t right.

� The sunrise.� He states quite clearly, but he doesn�t appear to be talking to them. � It�s the beginning, the birth, the start of life. And yet---it brings the realization that there is an end, a stop�a death.� The last causes an inexplicable shiver to run through them.

� Harry�� Sirius chokes. The sitting boy ignores him.

� But this sunrise will remain.� He touches the canvas reverently and it ripples to his hand like a great cat arching up to its owner�s gentling. � Everything in my life can fade, but this last sunrise will forever hold this one feeling I will cherish even when I die. For true art is more than worth a life.� With these words the young man closes his eyes and collapses to his back, unmoving.

The thud of Harry�s body snaps the stillness inside both men and they run to his side. Skidding to a halt next to Harry Remus feels his foot kick something away and he watches it skid across the pine wood. He stares stupidly at the large bottle for long moments before his mind realizes what he�s seeing..

� Gods�Sirius he�s taken the rest of the calming potion!� Sirius� head snaps up from his position, cradling the unconscious body in his lap.

� But that bottle had over a hundred doses left�.� The dark haired man�s eyes widen before he flips his godson over, shoving two fingers down his throat. Immediately Harry�s whole body convulses and a thick mix of stomach acid and clear liquid spews onto the deck. Tears leak from his dark eyes as he continues to purge Harry of what he can. He barely acknowledges Remus moving away to firecall Poppy.

� Remus! What can I do for you this morning?� The pleasant face of the Hogwarts Nurse does nothing to calm the other man who�s close to hyperventilating. Finally he manages,

� Harry has overdose---on calming potion!� Then Remus watches something happen he�d never seen before. As soon as the nurse understands what is being said, she disappears for only a moment before she comes leaping through the flames, almost running into Remus and sprinting out to Sirius, a bag zooming after her. Only truly powerful wizards could move through fire without the aid of apparation or floo powder. He�d never think the woman a simple healer again!

An hour later finds the two men pacing the hallway outside of their guest bedroom. Poppy hadn�t let either of them in, instead ordering them to get Dumbledore and keep out of her way. Since then she hadn�t immerged, not even letting the Headmaster in when he arrived not ten minutes after the woman. The younger men had taken turns explaining the entire situation to the Headmaster, finding it necessary if the man was to help them help Harry.

� A savior in a world of hate, a victim in a world of love.� Was the last thing the bearded man had uttered before falling silent in his chair opposite the room.

Finally the door creaks open and the tired nurse steps into the hall, shutting the door behind her. The men wait expectantly.

� He�s alive.� She says, but immediately bursts into tears of anguish. Dumbledore is at her side in an instant, holding her to him. Neither of the other men understand, if Harry�s alive then what�s the problem? They rush past the older adults and into the room. Harry lay on the bed surrounded by bottles, looking completely at peace, his face and eyes relaxed and calm. They would have thought him dead despite the nurse�s announcement, if it hadn�t been for the magic line above him showing his heart beat. Moving into the room each man sits on either side of the young man, but his eyes turn to neither of them. Their only movement is when he blinks his lids languidly.

� Harry?� Remus calls gently. � Harry, it�s Remus and Sirius.�

� He won�t answer.� A trembling voice says from the front of the room. They turn to see Dumbledore leading the woman into the room to stand at the foot of the bed.

� What�s happened to him poppy?� The Headmaster asks gently. She takes a shaky breath.

� I was able to stop the potion from putting him into a coma that would have proven fatal, but��

� But what?! What�s happened to my godson?!� Sirius cries, unable to take the suspense.

� A calming potion�it works by suppressing all feeling but one of peace and calm. Harry�he took so much�.his other feelings, they can�t��

� He can no longer feel.� Dumbledore finishes.

� Not only that Albus, he�s not even awake really, he�s not aware of the world around him, he has no sense of free will. I�.I can�t bring him out of it.� The other three are caught in shock. � He will listen to simple commands. Harry, sit up please dear.� Remus moves back as the boy pushes himself into a seated position.

� What does this mean?� The tawny haired man asks. The nurse is quickly composing herself, moving back into the physician role.

� Basic functions he can handle; eating, drinking, breathing, sleeping, moving. However he cannot talk nor respond. He has no will power of his own.� Tears stain Sirius� cheeks as he pulls the young man to his chest while Poppy continues. � I�ve called St. Mungo�s��

� There�s no way in hell he�s going there!� Sirius growls, sounding very much like his animagus form while Remus agrees with him.

� I thought you both would feel that way. So I had them approve some spells that will help you take care of Harry. There�s a saliva spell that will help him eat and digest, also one I won�t go into detail so you won�t have to worry about bathroom use. I�ve included a locator spell that you can activate by saying Harry�s name to his heart line. I�ll be in to check on him everyday, you know where I am in the meantime.�

� Thank you Poppy for everything.� Sirius whispers. The nurse nods and leaves the room. Dumbledore walks to Harry�s side and lays a hand across the faded lighting scar.

� I suppose it is I that should be the one to inform Severus.� The two other men look at each other, they hadn�t thought about telling Severus yet�� He deserves to know.� The bearded man continues. Sirius bows his head.

� This is neither of your faults, even though some of your actions may have played an intricate role�� The door bursting open once more has all three men on their feet.

� What�s happened?� The deep voice of Ron Weasley�s cries out, rushing to Harry�s still sitting form. � Harry, Harry are you all right?� Remus put his arms around the red-head�s shoulder, Sirius pushing Harry to lay back down.

� Sit over here Ron, we�ll explain everything.� The boy, who used to be well known for his temper, sits passively as the two men tell the tale once more, glancing over at Harry every now and then, who merely lays blinking at the ceiling. When it is over, Harry�s best friend is in tears.

� I knew about Draco. Harry told me before we went kayaking. Why do you think my letter sounded so suggestive? I felt the same way you guys did, I wanted Severus to feel the same way my mate was� Both men take in the new information. How could everyone in Harry�s life see what was happening besides his lover? One word; Draco.

� What are we going to do now? Is there a chance he�ll come out of it?� Ron whispers desperately.

� Poppy says it�s like amnesia, except instead of starting from nothing he hasn�t started again at all. She said to try and bring him to familiar places, get him around things that have a lot of meaning to him. But it�s likely he�ll be like this the rest of his life.� Dumbledore answers. Ron nods and stands.

� All right then, I�ll take the bedroom next to Harry�s I just have to go to my apartment and get a few things.�

� What?� Sirius blurts.

� There�s no way I�m leaving my best friend at a time like this, if there�s any chance of him coming out of it I�ve got just as likely a chance as either of you. Hermoine�s in Romania and I doubt the delicacy of her work will allow her to come here for a while.� Sirius grins as the redhead runs his hand through Harry�s hair before retreating from the room.

� What should we do with the painting?� Remus asks breaking the silence. � It�s so�.intense.�

� What painting?� Dumbledore inquires.

Dumbledore had stared at the painting much as the other two had before levitating it into Harry�s bedroom, carefully covering it with a cushioning shield and then a sheet Remus had provided.

� I don�t know any other place better for it, perhaps it could serve a purpose in here. Gentlemen, I�m sorry to say I must take my leave, I will return tomorrow afternoon to check in and then I shall inform Severus of this news. Goodnight Sirius, Remus.� Moving to the bed as Ron had Dumbledore leans down to whisper in the still boy�s ear. Standing the older man moves out of the room.
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When the Mind Breaks