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Happiness	By : SlytherinWench Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female > Draco/Hermione Views: 2307 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. And I do not make money from these writings.

Chapter List
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Chapter 2

Draco gazed around the hall, his
food sitting untouched on his plate. He didn�t have much of an appetite lately;
instead he preferred to constantly and mindlessly rearrange the piles of food
he put in front of himself. He didn�t interact much with the other Slytherins
either. He wasn�t feeling particularly sociable. He wasn�t feeling particularly
anything but numb lately. Draco pushed his peas around as he thought back to
why he was back at Hogwarts. His parents were on house arrest until further
notice, their �lenient� punishment for turning on Voldemort at the last minute.
And Draco was made to return to school so that he could �finish his education
properly and further himself in the wizarding world�, �to make a better name
for the Malfoys�. He sighed. His stupid, bloody, misguided parents; they had
gotten him into this mess in the first place and now here he was back with a
bunch of snotty, loathsome, unintelligent prats. All of whom gave him a wide
berth wherever he went. That last part was fine with Draco; he didn�t really
come back to school to make friends anyway. And really, what else should he
have expected? That the students would welcome him with open arms, just because
his father decided to turn tail? HA! Draco knew better than to expect anything
like that. After all, if the situations were reversed, he probably wouldn�t talk
to himself either.

As Draco stabbed his chicken for
the third time, his eyes wandered over the other students around him. None of
his usual cronies were here anymore. Crabbe, Goyle, Parkinson, Zambini, Nott-
all of them were gone. Crabbe, Parkinson and Nott had been killed while the
others had fled or were in prison. It was odd sitting at the table, or in
classes, or in the common room without them. Draco had never realized how much
he had actually depended upon and enjoyed their company until they were gone.

�� Gone
and never coming back,� he mumbled to himself as he continued looking around
the hall. His eyes surveyed the other house tables, a lot of faces were missing
it seemed. The once crowded room was now barely half way full. Slytherin hadn�t
been the only house to rack up casualties it seemed. Draco spotted the
Gryffindor table and two of the members of the Golden Trio. His anger rose up
inside of him. Of course they were back- Potter and Weasel wanted to become
Aurors so they had to finish school. And Miss Know It All Granger would never
pass up an opportunity to show off. They made him sick. Here he was sitting
alone, his friends all lost to him, and they all still had each other. It was
the same as it had always been, every year they would get themselves into one
sticky situation or another and each time they would come out on top. Pristine.
Perfect. Golden. They made him want to vomit bile.

Draco pushed his plate away from
him and stood up. He hadn�t been hungry before, but he definitely wasn�t hungry
now, not after seeing the Golden Fucking Amazing Trio again. He wished for the
millionth time that he had not been forced back to school. It was like torture.
But, he supposed, that�s probably why he had been sent back. It was his
punishment for the part he played in Voldemort�s Army. His parents were
imprisoned at home and he was trapped here at Hogwarts with the memories and
the reminders and the bloody fucking war heroes day in and day out. Was it
worth it? Was it worth living every second in their presence, being haunted by
their gallantry, constantly reminded of his cowardice and faults and bad
choices? As Draco stormed out of the Great Hall, he reminded himself that
Malfoys were above killing themselves� no matter how much they wanted to do so
sometimes. He had to keep his head and suffer the rest of the school year. Then
he could get the bloody hell away from these halls, these people, these
memories and start anew. Maybe he would move to America or Australia- somewhere
far from here where no one really knew the murky pond scum that had become the
Malfoy name.

Soon Draco found himself atop the
Astronomy Tower. Despite everything that had happened to him up here, he found
that he came here quite often. It seemed peaceful and comfortable somehow. He
took a seat on the ground and leaned back, gazing out at the sky. It was
another beautiful, clear, starry night. There had been a lot of those kinds of
nights ever since the Dark Lord was defeated. The stillness, the quiet, the
surrounding darkness all seemed to echo something deep inside him and he felt the
darkened sky was a part of him and so he sat up here almost every night, just
wrapping himself in the comfortable feeling he experienced- the feeling of
being numb and free at the same time. It was an odd feeling, like the world was
crumbling down around him, but he didn�t care. He supposed he just couldn�t
make himself care anymore. Maybe that was the problem. But why care when no one
else seemed to? No one cared that though he may have made some bad choices in
his life he hadn�t really known better- and when it came down to making the
worst choice of all, he hadn�t done it. He hadn�t killed Dumbledore. Draco may
have a rotten-mouthed, ill-tempered, bigot during his childhood, but he was not
and never would be a murderer. And though it mattered little to everyone else,
it mattered to him. When the chips were down, Draco hadn�t been able to cast
the killing curse. He had failed his father and mother that night, he had
failed the Dark Lord, but he knew deep down inside he hadn�t failed himself-
and right now, that was the only hope he had for himself. He knew if he could
just get away from the past and start over, he could let that little spark of
hope inside of him flourish and he could become a completely different person.
He just had to get through the school year.

Draco�s eyes slowly closed as his
mind started to quiet down. He had done a lot of reminiscing tonight, too much,
and it wore him out. Now, he just wanted to drift into that peaceful void of
silence he felt when he was up here. Some nights he would fall asleep up here
for a few hours, he felt like tonight would probably be one of those nights. He
was so tired, even his bones ached inside of him. Draco focused on the darkness
behind his lids and felt his mind still. Silence. Nothing. Perfect.

Suddenly Draco sat up straight, his
whole body alert. He had heard something and it sounded close. He stood up and
looked out over the tower walls, off into the Forbidden Forest, his eyes and
ears searching for any hint of disturbance. Draco ran his hand through his
hair, how long had he been up here now? That was the problem when he shut his
mind off, he lost track of time. From the looks of the sky it seemed like it
was probably well past curfew now, he should head back. As he turned towards
the door, he heard a creaking sound followed by muffled footsteps. Draco wrapped
his cloak tight around himself and sank down into the shadows. He certainly
hoped it wasn�t a professor doing rounds; all he needed was another detention. He
sat waiting in perfect silence until the door opened a tiny bit and then closed
itself. At first Draco thought he had been seeing things, but then he heard a
rustling sound and a head appeared in the thin air. Draco grimaced at the image
before him- he blinked once, twice, and shook himself- why was Hermione Granger�s
head floating in front of him? �It took
Draco a moment to realize that she was wearing Potter�s stupid invisibility cloak.
She had used it to sneak up here, to invade his private utopia. How dare she?!
Anger and indignation welled up inside Draco as he stepped out of the shadows.

�� Well,
well. What have we here- The Gryffindor Princess sneaking out and breaking
curfew? Tsk Tsk Granger. You�re setting a bad example
for the other students.� Draco drawled as Hermione jumped, obviously startled.
She spun around to face him, and one look at her told Draco this was going to
be an awkward meeting. Tears streamed down Hermione�s face and the pain in her
eyes made the smirk on his face drop. What the hell was she crying about?
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Happiness